Hear me out: A maki roll made with tuna, spicy mayo, lightly pickled cucumber is... a tuna fish sandwich
Unabashedly blue in my politics. Profane in my wit (or half of it). Adept in the Way of Absolute Candor. Pronouns aren't hard to learn. Anti-assclown/troll/MAGAT curator of the #BlockTheseTwitteratwits list. Living Among Clouds, Emerald City. Always Ω
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Hear me out: A maki roll made with tuna, spicy mayo, lightly pickled cucumber is... a tuna fish sandwich
But until then, I will give him the same benefit of the doubt I might give any other sewage-outflow bathing, heroin-addictes, roadkill-eating, brainworm parasite-afflicted dumbfuck trust fund kid who has never had to work for a living
I'm going to be real. The day that RFK brushes his teeth, stops chewing tobacco, and doesn't have advanced gum disease is the day I might consider giving him the same credibility as a 5th grader from Texas
As a citizen I am writing to Trump to tell him he is fired immediately based on the fact that he is a convicted fellow who overinflated the value of his properties to obtain loans. #ProudBlue#Voices4Victory apple.news/ACaTvSHxQSWW...
If only Trump's hands healed as quickly as his ear did.
Maybe Ken Martin should have stopped handing out pencils, then.
It's cannula bruising. He's getting infusions every other day. Whether it's blood or drugs or saline, it's absolutely clear that he is unwell, unfit to serve, and in a steep decline both mentally and physically. Anyone else would have been removed via 25th Amendment five minutes into his term.
Good. Let's start with all the Jan 6, 2021 rioters and the instigators.
I'd rather have actual democracy and slightly more crime than a syphilitic felon and rapist as a fascist dictator.
I don't track Taylor Swift stuff, but I'll say this: If she and Travis Kelce get divorced, the next album is going to go quadruple platinum. They may actually have to create a new category of album for it. And Kanye West can sit his shitty fascist crazypants down at the awards show.
Which begs the question: Can't they auto-darwinate in less expensive ways?? And on ugly and cheaper bikes that don't make me cringe when I think of $50,000 of bespoke machinery getting destroyed?
Awwww. Well, at least her staff were there to listen. All 8 of them www.thedailybeast.com/nancy-mace-c...
i love this journey for her
Two, women who are attracted to men doing stupid shit on motorcycles without the safety gear are not looking to have your babies. Nobody wants stupid kids.
Deer summer motorcyclists: I know it's tempting to do your crotch rocket revving and everything- lane splitting, wheelies, and all the summertime hijinks in shorts, t-shirt and a helmet. But consider two things. One there's a reason my ER doctor and nurse friends call them donor cycles.
They gaslit you all throughout the election.
“I was r*ped sometimes 3 times a day on that island… and I was not the only girl on that island… Ghislaine must die in prison, because I’ve been in hell and back for the last 17 years.” Listen to the survivors.
"limp" is pretty much Bret Baier's default setting
But sunblock is still higher on the list than either of those.
Think of it like someone claiming to be a player or alpha male and not understanding that the term is both idiotic and classifies them as a complete douchenozzle. So what I'm actually getting at here is that Donald Trump can't even aspire to the level of being categorized as a douchenozzle.
I never said that. I just said he's not classy enough to be one.
Dear Alaskan volcanoes and seismic faults: It sure would be awful if you did a thing when Trump and Putin were near you. Just awful. Terrible. Sincerely, the world
Trump is a RAPIST! Needs more coverage. Threat to women everywhere 😡
Spoiler: he knows fuck all about grass except for how it affects his cheating at golf.
WHERE IT WAS LITERALLY HER JOB THAT SHE DIDN'T DO. So, yeah, fuck that extra ugly fat fucking slob of a human being who abused her government position to deny marriage licenses to LGBTQIA+ couples based on her halfassed religious idiocy. She gets nothing. You can compare her to a alligator cloaca.
Those who might say she fell from the top of the fat & ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down? I remind you that all human beings, regardless of their appearance, are valid and should be treated with respect, except for those who refuse to do the same for others as a public servant.
Kim Davis is still the absolute worst person you could ever use to make the argument for marriage being between a man and a woman. She's been married four times. Divorced for three. And she's as coherent a defender of marriage as Donald Trump after 8PM.
I keep getting people asking me to help fund something. After 2024, I don't fund a damn thing until I see some kind of actual legal requirements. Don't come at me with "we need $5 to defeat Trump's agenda" when you had all that and still fucked it up. Do better. Like Mamdani.
Slightly diminish a band: Blind Melonballer
The best thing about Keith Ollbermann is that over the decades I've watched him go from someone on cable TV barely holding it in to someone who just DGAF who hears him say exactly what everyone is thinking.
The links to each predator are posted on my Twitter account. x.com/antifaoperat...
There were 34 church leaders & christian school employees who were arrested, pled guilty and/or were sentenced to prison for child sex crimes in the month of July.
This is the proud work of some lovely Alabama Democrats!
youtube.com/watch?v=jdCp...
💯
Koh: If he were serious about cutting crime he wouldn't be proposing cutting $400 million from the ATF or cutting $500 million from the FBI, 700 agents or the DEA with with drug enforcement or the office of violence against women, 100 million from there
This tracks
Trump is on every page of the Epstein files. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
Trump is a dementia-riddled pedophile. That's it's that's the skeet
This is perfect.
I have always, ALWAYS been highly suspicious of evangelicals and evangelical religions, even as early as three years old. Right now? All of my worst assumptions are being proven true.
Thought Trump's Epstein scandal might bother evangelicals? No, they couldn't care less. The collective shrug is part of a long evangelical tradition of falling for narcissists who pose as saviors.
Don't be this asshole.
Abbott just issued arrest warrants for the Dems who fled the state. Rep Jasmine Crockett: unbothered. “You have a lot of intelligent attorneys that serve in the Texas House, and so they know there’s nothing he can do outside of the Texas jurisdiction.”
Seriously, someone needs to give these Republicans a makeover so they DON'T wear the glasses most likely to remind their voters of 1980s Afterschool Special pedophiles.
Republican Rep. Mike Flood’s town hall was a dumpster fire: for him. “There’s been a lot of misinformation out there about the bill,” Flood said. Yes, there has. From you and Republicans trying to hoodwink us. The crowd yelled, “Vote him out!” as the hour-and-a-half meeting ended.
... I disagree, unless you're describing the notion of why billionaires are bad and we should have zero of them
Okay but seriously WHAT IS IT WITH MAGA IDIOTS AND THEIR TONGUES TODAY
I can't believe I'm saying this but I have a feeling that was just straight up fucking genocidal incompetence not actual intentional genocide
Her expression is the same one I've seen on so many journalists' faces listening to him. It says, "I could be doing something less demeaning and pointless. Like installing left-hand signals on BMWs and Priuses"
"Yeah, that guy might have created a terrorist state and intentionally starved millions to death while manufacturing a crisis designed to purge an ethnic minority from his nation in direct violation of the UN charter and against the Geneva Convention, but Elon is such a douche" I mean I see it, but
But but but if you tax 2% on $1m that's $20k the millionaires can't spend on something vital and important like shoes they're never going to wear
I mean I'm just saying, holy shit, Musk is a complete incompetent douchebag who has one of the most punchable faces on the planet but HOW IS HE BELOW AN ACTUAL ARCHITECT OF GENOCIDE
Okay but for real how is Musk BELOW an actual genocidal dictator
If any of this was true my prescription wouldn't cost $20 today instead of the $3 it cost when Biden was president.
Chances are in the Epstein room at Lard-A-MAGA
I just want to point out that Comer invested a bunch of money with sketchy AF marijuana grow-ops out of China and also has a face like an aged pancake. And he's approximately 5 years older than me, which makes me wonder if he drank from the wrong holy Grail but like just a sip to be polite
It is Tuesday, August 5, 2025! MAGA: Trump as proof that there is a God. Me: He is the is proof there isn't a God. Me: But there is a @thegodpodcast.com podcast. MAGA: Jesus Christ! Me: Yeah, he's on there too.
A modest suggestion.
Like oh God that is SUCH an eye bleach moment in history
Okay but can we maybe talk about exactly what RFK jr is doing there with his tongue and why he's giving Trump a complete eyefucking because I want to be clear holy shit this is the worst slashfic timeline ever
SO NOTHING TO SEE HERE FOLKS! Oh wait, YOU ALREADY SAW IT! So we don't have to release anymore stuff. WE THE PEOPLE DEMAND TO SEE THE UNREDACTED EPSTEIN FILES. NOTHING REDACTED.
Trump officially has a lower approval rating than spray cheese ravioli and unsolicited dick pic text messages
This cat keeps grabbing my arm and snuggling like "no. Too early. Silly human give more belly scritches"
I have avoided Texas for the last 25 years. I don't go there. I don't buy Texan products. I don't patronize Texas companies, and I generally won't buy stuff from Etsy or eBay shops operating out of Texas. I can't "avoid all Texas" because logistic supply chains are a thing but yeah. #MessWithTexas
I tend to think of it like a bender. You know, if going to Vegas and drinking for a whole week every day from morning to 3am. After a while you probably don't notice that anything is wrong, you just order another triple martini and omelette special and stumble out to lose another $50b at Idiot Poker
Ever notice women don't post shit like "nobody wants a man who [insert things here]"? I'm just sayin'
Good morning 🌞
Now let's look at Jerkules 10 years later... oh god, he drank from the wrong holy grail, didn't he
Surprisingly enough this worked a lot better for me growing up than any "method" or pick up artist bullshit. It truly is weird how the best method to get a relationship absolutely still comes down to "don't be an asshole."
Then you make sure they understand that treating a woman like a person and not a lesser being simply because they have a double X chromosome and boobies tends to get you laid far more often than being a douchebag
I have a surefire way for teenage boys looking for love to find it. It's really easy. You increase availability of birth control, make sure that every one of their peers has access to excellent healthcare and family planning options, including pregnancy termination services and care.
I see her, resplendent in her wedding dress, beaming as she walks down the aisle to her husband, a redheaded boy in a suit so happy to be her husband he cannot sit still. If there is a next life, We shall seek for you there. If not, then there, too.
Bonney Shideler passed today at 2:30 pm, PST. She is preceded by her husband, Ed Shideler, her son, Scott Shideler, her grandson, Ryan Shideler, her sister, Jody, her brother in law, Elmer, and countless others. She is missed. She is loved. She is with those who have waited for her out of our resch
I am saying farewell to a truly honored person who is loved by so many people in my life this week. Her gifts of love and compassion, humor, comfort, and grace have been a bedrock of the lives of so many of us. We step into her room, and even as wasted and thin and exhausted as she is, she shines.
Part of me thinks my spirit animal is the bear. The part of me that's honest knows my spirit totem is the Nac Mac Feegle.
I mean, he doesn't want to see Democrats like Pelosi enriching herself. Which is fair, none of the Democratic base want that either. Where we differ is that he just wants that for HIMSELF and his cronies, and we want him in prison for that shit.
My wife and I when seeing a bunny in our garden: OH HEY hi there little guy, don't worry, go ahead and nosh on whatever you want, it's cool Our cats: OH YOU GODDAMN PIECE OF SHIT BUNNYFUCKER I WILL KILL YOU SO DEAD ONCE THEY LET ME OUT OF THIS HOUSE
What's your summer road trip secret? Mine is that there is a Greek Orthodox Monastery between Goldendale and Yakima, and it has the BEST baklava. I always stop there on any road trip involving that route, and will avoid doing that road on Sunday (when it is closed).
Okay but your post actually gave me a headache to decipher and process because you spell like an epileptic walrus. Please, just go back to Xitter.
The DC Bar recommends Jeffrey Clark - an architect of the insurrection - be disbarred.
No way. The guy who literally created troll and bot farms to boost himself on Xitter also lied about his advertising traffic?
I'm okay if they want to play with lawn darts. For real. Just as long as they're also drunk
Like I don't know how to say this but the phrasing in this article is entirely "my perspective is the only valid one" and beyond tone-deaf to literally every other parenting experience
Wow. I mean, good for your personal choices but also fuck you on behalf of all single child parents, adults who were single children, and also parents who have lost children, both as kids and as adults
Most people I know have seen this. But, MAGA needs to see it, so please share it elsewhere.
I'm beginning to think Trump doesn't understand the concept of shutting the fuck up
Dems should vow to impeach Bove and any nominee who did not testify truthfully under oath
If you are over 70, you should not be able to run for office. End. Of. Story.
She is truly honored among a large number of humans whose lives she brought to this world, whose lives she has touched, and who she smiles as they come to visit her in her room. As I travel home I hope that one day as I lie dreaming in my final twilight, that I dream about as joyous a life as she.
She still dreams, and she smiles, and her face lights up like a wildfire when she sees other of her beloved. But the time comes soon. I am bereft for the joy of knowing her. I am bereft for the agony of letting her go. I am heartbroken that I cannot be with her. I grieve for a woman not yet gone.
And when she slips into the dream, and her breath quietly ends, I will still love her and be loved by her and her beauty, her grace, and her dreams.
"But why are you all here?" She asks, in a cracked whisper. "We came to see you," I whisper back. "I've always loved you," she says to my daughter and squeezes her hand with all her strength, which is none at all, and I know she means all of us, here and not here, there and not, born and unborn.