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Parker

@jeffparker.bsky.social

Writer of BATMAN/SILENT KNIGHT RETURNS all December long! And then the ZOOTOPIA comic in January! Join me in the fight against Motion Smoothing, heroes. In between missions I cease to exist https://www.jeffparkerwrites.com

created May 13, 2023

10,065 followers 1,407 following 12,799 posts

view profile on Bluesky

Posts

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

maybe he'll have some cops plant something on Cuomo

5/9/2025, 9:20:16 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

haha

5/9/2025, 9:19:19 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

everyone should be wearing clown noses now, this place is Clown Town

5/9/2025, 9:17:59 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Oklahoma Comic Arts Foundation (@okcomicarts.bsky.social) reposted

PANEL ALERT! GIMME A BREAK! How Three Comics Pros Made it to the Mainstream Find out how to break into comics from Isaac Goodheart (Christopher Chaos), @gavinguidry.bsky.social (Action Comics) and @jeffparker.bsky.social (Zootopia), moderated by Brian Winkeler (Garbage Pail Kids)!

Photos of Isaac Goodheart, Gavin Guidry and Jeff Parker promoting their BREAKING INTO COMICS panel!
5/9/2025, 2:13:58 PM | 11 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Phil Hester (@philhester.bsky.social) reposted

If you like Swamp Thing like I like Swamp Thing, you should attend Hero Initiative's Drink and Draw at this year's Rose City Comic-con for an opportunity to own this giant sketch by yours truly.

An ink sketch of Wein & Wrightson's legendary creation Swamp Thing, as drawn by me.
5/9/2025, 4:43:49 AM | 285 44 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

Duke Leto, bite down on the tooth

5/9/2025, 4:47:41 AM | 18 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

👏

4/9/2025, 10:39:39 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I know your will be their

4/9/2025, 10:12:38 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

Google should be embarrassed and tech bros, stop shoveling your garbage AI at us

A Google AI Overview that says John Mulaney does not appear in Peacock's POKER FACE. It is displaying a picture of John Mulaney playing an FBI agent on POKER FACE.
4/9/2025, 6:28:14 AM | 66 6 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

gosh!

4/9/2025, 4:41:44 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

yeah, the implication that you are the worst people to entrust a dog too is funny and just going to get funnier

4/9/2025, 3:46:21 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

yes, fuck that guy

4/9/2025, 3:33:17 AM | 65 5 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

read my post again Paul

4/9/2025, 3:30:02 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

worst barbershop quintet ever

4/9/2025, 2:08:34 AM | 59 3 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

🥳🎵🎂

4/9/2025, 12:41:43 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

turn back! this way lies madness

3/9/2025, 10:33:13 PM | 15 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

and this from a YALE man

3/9/2025, 10:25:57 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

what, did he give Scott a lift from the airport one time or something

3/9/2025, 10:06:05 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

tobacco is good, actually

3/9/2025, 8:38:49 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

one day someone will make Hugo a little turtleneck sweater.

3/9/2025, 8:35:31 PM | 8 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Rob Levin (@roblevin.bsky.social) reposted

Happy BATMAN #1 Day to all who celebrate!

A physical copy of BATMAN #1 by Matt Fraction, Jorge Jiménez, Tomeu Morey, and Clayton Cowles. And it’s beautiful!
3/9/2025, 8:11:38 PM | 98 11 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

"the rest of us introduce ourselves by our first names"

3/9/2025, 7:21:10 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

*Bounty Hunter*

3/9/2025, 7:19:43 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

you can bring Memoryman into the DCU

3/9/2025, 6:22:30 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

and find out Chloe's uncle is a puppet

3/9/2025, 4:39:24 PM | 26 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

you can't beat that end where Mary starts looking back and forth at Elvis and Jesus and goes aha

3/9/2025, 4:23:38 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

Spinch is like the Elves of LOTR, she can walk on snow without sinking in

3/9/2025, 4:14:24 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

he's the best part of Hail Caesar

3/9/2025, 3:51:07 PM | 12 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Zoe Tunnell (@zoewithasword.bsky.social) reposted

Hey it is a BIG COMIC DAY and in all the fuss you should make sure you pick up CLOSER. Kieron, Steve and Tamra have told a beautiful, haunting apocalypse romance one-shot here that is so deeply, clearly something that could only have been made by this specific creative team. Go buy it!!

The cover to Closer by Steve Lieber and Tamra Bonvillain
3/9/2025, 3:33:56 PM | 77 21 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

they really don't get that when she ran, and also Jeb! was running, it just came across as dynastic trade-offs, where your options were either a Bush or Clinton. That was a big part of voters staying home and no one takes the lesson

3/9/2025, 3:08:02 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I have to think after all she grew up seeing she's not considering running for office at all and this is just some rando's post

3/9/2025, 2:45:13 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

"C'monnnn, cash-app the money so I can send ya the pill."

3/9/2025, 2:36:41 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

the one where he pours the Bud Light down the toilet, I am ready for the constant emails

3/9/2025, 2:28:12 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

hell yeah, this is the New Ark 2!

the crew of ARK 2 standing in front of ARK 2
3/9/2025, 6:17:42 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture John Allison (@badmachinery.com) reposted

I've finished re-tooling my complicated pages for my Webtoon editor. I moaned when I realised I was going to have to do it but every one was a fun logic puzzle to be solved. On some I had to extract elements from the page so it could be chopped up...

2/9/2025, 3:04:50 PM | 98 10 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

what do you have in the bottom, bricks?

3/9/2025, 6:05:43 AM | 16 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

the high-up chuds will probably try to hang together as long as they can, but they will definitely chuck her in the bin immediately

3/9/2025, 3:03:36 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Dylan Todd (@dylantodd.bsky.social) reposted

COMIC BOOK EDITORS & CREATORS! I'm available for logo work, book design, brand design and consultation, marketing/social media templates and graphics, etc. If you’re a cool person and want to make a cool thing, drop me a line. dylantodd.com/work

Logo for the comic book The Department of Truth. Looks like it's composed of photocopied papers what have been shredded and put back together again. Logo for the comic book Grim. Large, distressed letterforms communicate the premise of a new young woman becoming the new Grim Reaper. Front and back cover for the first deluxe hardcover for The Department of Truth. Logo for Variant Edition, an Edmonton comic book store.
2/9/2025, 8:39:51 PM | 81 59 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

just one of those stray thoughts that a site like this helps me purge, no Yoakum news or anything

3/9/2025, 12:42:52 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

there was one parked on my street the other day and it put me in a horrible mood!

3/9/2025, 12:42:03 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

Dwight Yoak-them

2/9/2025, 11:59:14 PM | 10 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Owen Dennis (@oweeeeendennis.bsky.social) reposted

I'm constantly telling people in these studios that, if you're thoughtful, a 2D movie with a budget of 7-10 million can feel like a 50-70 million dollar movie. 3D? Not as likely. Cheap 3D tends to look like cheap 3D, no matter how hard you try to hide it. You can really do amazing things with 2D.

2/9/2025, 6:26:35 AM | 1045 263 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

Oh you're an AI-Artist? You're legit? I bet you really shred in Guitar Hero too

2/9/2025, 11:36:05 PM | 99 18 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

ok, setting it up to expect 3 letters was sloppy, sure

2/9/2025, 10:18:35 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

my dudes

2/9/2025, 10:15:30 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

why is lamb and mask throwing em

2/9/2025, 10:14:33 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

here's what they are, I couldn't think of the name: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electro...

2/9/2025, 8:08:09 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

my dad briefly ran an arcade around then and it had those early cabinet games which mostly had a light gun to shoot targets in a diorama with some little props like flying saucers

2/9/2025, 6:57:28 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

or a milkshake

2/9/2025, 6:51:29 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ken Lowery (@kenlowery.bsky.social) reposted

Apple cider donut, imo

2/9/2025, 6:22:05 PM | 47 5 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

The age gap, even wider!

2/9/2025, 5:54:27 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

Thanks for nothing!

2/9/2025, 5:29:02 PM | 8 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

when the bros die laughing and then say "I don't even know what that's from!"

2/9/2025, 5:08:41 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

especially when presented by a boyfriend

2/9/2025, 5:07:57 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

it really was!

2/9/2025, 4:53:34 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

John Mulaney as the new Robert Culp

2/9/2025, 1:54:32 PM | 9 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

The one Columbo tradition I'd kind of like to see them try, though it might be too confusing with modern always-accessible tv, is to bring an actor back as a different villain

2/9/2025, 1:48:21 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

48 to 14, Yikes

2/9/2025, 1:29:38 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

that's kind of how I already dress, I want to work up to that stately farmer look one day!

2/9/2025, 7:35:55 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

6 is the one I'm talking about. The first half of the season I really only was into the Mulaney episode, and the second half of the season got much stronger.

2/9/2025, 7:24:18 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

imagine AI trying to emulate the horniness of Wally Wood art.

2/9/2025, 7:22:49 AM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

did you get to the Bad Seed/Evil Girl episode?

2/9/2025, 7:18:08 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I propose a BABE screening for all of us

2/9/2025, 7:06:56 AM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

also I am not the Inktober guy, I always advise people to do their paying work and ignore it

2/9/2025, 7:04:45 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

I really enjoyed this season of Poker Face but since Lyonne bummed everyone out by shilling for AI, there's not as many people to talk about it with this time.

2/9/2025, 6:39:49 AM | 61 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

we all want the Bloody Large Glasses.

2/9/2025, 6:37:29 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

well now, that's all of us

2/9/2025, 6:31:58 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

the white hair fooled me!

2/9/2025, 6:31:44 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

yes I am planning on de-aging Matt, mainly I just want to dress like him

2/9/2025, 6:30:25 AM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

Drop an old person you're going to turn into in the future

2/9/2025, 4:07:01 AM | 47 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Kate Heartfield (@kateheartfield.com) reposted

One of my favourite Graham Greene roles. That dry delivery.

2/9/2025, 12:00:11 AM | 39 10 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture nobody (@petbugs13.bsky.social) reposted

so what if the reason they aren't letting Trump talk is that he had a Fetterman stroke and now he is woke

1/9/2025, 9:58:45 PM | 238 35 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

🏁

1/9/2025, 11:56:08 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

"If found, please return to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue"

1/9/2025, 11:16:25 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I mean the shirt as identifier/reminder alone

1/9/2025, 10:57:40 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

BREATHE with an EEEeeee

1/9/2025, 10:14:41 PM | 12 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

a children of the corn could be sleeping in there

1/9/2025, 9:39:43 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Tim Onion (@bencollins.bsky.social) reposted

"Blueskyism" helped make The Onion one of the largest newspapers in the world in less than a year. If we had spent all of our time on Twitter, we'd be poorer, dumber and terminally ill with internet poisoning. He's just angry he's wasting away over there in a nazi agnostic lane that doesn't exist.

1/9/2025, 8:51:37 PM | 14977 2091 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I've gone back and forth on this, but I get the reasoning.

1/9/2025, 7:38:04 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

this is the way☝️

1/9/2025, 7:35:18 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I thought I felt something click in place, in the universe

1/9/2025, 7:06:36 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

yes. In the article, the only one that sounds interesting is by Dale Earnhardt Jr.

1/9/2025, 6:57:13 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

please! rough in some crappy lettering in your layout so their good lettering has the space to breath.

1/9/2025, 6:56:02 PM | 53 13 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

twice, too!

1/9/2025, 6:54:47 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

I was more attuned to the shelf-space grabbing by celeb picture books when my kids were small, the famous names always get paired with top artists to make their cloying self indulgences seem legit, with a rare good one. But they never stick with kids, don't get requested a lot

1/9/2025, 6:54:24 PM | 15 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

like... from a treatment... that makes one's hair fall out?

1/9/2025, 4:28:01 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

yep, his head is buzzzzzed (and he looks barely reanimated)

1/9/2025, 4:25:05 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

ooh, I didn't see it

1/9/2025, 4:23:27 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

trying to start a movement to egg on a patient into doing something inadvisable

1/9/2025, 4:21:13 PM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

is this other people spitballing too? I mean it seems likely

1/9/2025, 4:18:02 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

Since no news outlet I've heard of before will cover it, I'll be your source with pure guesswork- Trump is laid up from triple bypass surgery. If he wants to prove that's not true, walk outside the White House on live tv, simple

1/9/2025, 4:01:31 PM | 23 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Critical Nostalgia (@highway62.bsky.social) reposted

My wife and I went to Paris last year and on our first day there, we got some labor history. Like how the baguette became common because it obviated the need for workers to carry knives at all times because when Parisians get upset, the guide said, they RIOT. That's what's up.

1/9/2025, 2:38:25 PM | 40 11 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

author Larry Niven, discussing the problems with a Kryptonian under a yellow sun having intimate relations with an Earth woman
1/9/2025, 7:02:43 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social)

this TikTok "Murder a neighbor in their home" challenge goes too far, imo

1/9/2025, 6:57:03 AM | 22 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

Bluescolds 1, Dan 0

1/9/2025, 6:41:09 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

What a world!

1/9/2025, 5:45:47 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

nm I saw the other post, and the rope!

1/9/2025, 5:21:28 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

the one with the rope, right?

1/9/2025, 5:20:05 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

I think of him as Colonel Pickering from My Fair Lady, but sure

1/9/2025, 5:14:39 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Parker (@jeffparker.bsky.social) reply parent

good point, we didn't distinguish the screenplay- it then blurs more when you think about Dahl writing You Only Live Twice

1/9/2025, 4:08:02 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view