This was so fun! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/h...
You might know me from stand up, Baskets, Euphoria, or calling people cunts on Twitter. Sorry.
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This was so fun! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/h...
I can’t quit TikTok because just this morning I saw people post comments about Millie Boppy Brown and L Rob Hubbard.
Okay. I just came back to this and you aren’t calling these efforts resegregation yet, you absolutely should be
Spiders having the time of their lives out here hiding under trash can lids and acting like they’re the startled ones. You got me again fellas.
Look at this graph. The share of national income going to the richest 10 percent was lowest (and share to lower 90 percent highest) when union membership was at its highest. As unions have weakened, inequality has widened. This is why we must build back union power.
If you played me this clip of a Georgia congressman named "Buddy Carter" talking with this accent, I would've called you a hack filmmaker.
I love that there’s a faction of Gen Z who sincerely refers to Rolling Stone magazine as The Rolling Stones
No matter what @MarshaBlackburn keeps saying, it’s not criminals they’re targeting. www.cnn.com/2025/08/30/u...
www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...
May I ask you to closely read this v short piece I wrote in October 2023? Like really parse it? It makes me sick that it now reads like a blueprint. Shame - unforgivable, irredeemable shame forever on our leaders. ❤️🩹🇵🇸https://tribunemag.co.uk/2023/10/rob-delaney-gaza-palestine-israel-genocide
On one hand, reducing car use reduces urban pollution. But on the other, everyone likes it and cities become more livable
trump finally appearing on a balcony on sunday like first of all my doctor said i may have set the world record for health
RFK Jr looks like he’s been sampling the diseases at the CDC
Hi I’m a bothsides guy: I loudly enter a conflict of obvious one-sided oppression, seeking “dialogue” and “mutual accountability” between lopsided aggressors and victims. I inevitably devolve into supporting the more powerful badguys, because they are better at flattering and bribing me!
To Donald Trump and his administration: If you hurt my people, nothing will stop me — not time or political circumstance — from making sure you face justice under our constitutional rule of law.
TRUMP: *Signs order to put congressional Democrats in front of a firing squad" NYT: President Trump took the extraordinary step of moving to reduce number of Democratic votes in a legally dubious maneuver that could undermine the independence of the Congress.
Called it.
If I had one wish from a genie it would be to have video of every time I’ve ever tripped, stumbled, or fallen. Guilt-free laughs for the rest of my life.
They won’t release the Epstein list because two of the muppets are on there
Love this song and this band so much. Listened to the album over and over when it first came out. Thanks for sharing this video! 🙂💗
This They Might Be Giants TONIGHT SHOW performance of "Birdhouse In Your Soul" from 1990 remains firmly lodged in my noggin thanks to the Tonight Show Band's full commitment and Doc Severinsen's incredible trumpeting... It took an already great song and made it transcendent.
This is so important… Sharon has been tracking license plates on cars driven by ICE agents, and she’s finding they don’t match the vehicles. In other words, ICE is using secret, illegal tactics—just like we suspected. REMINDER: the DMV is not a federal agency. @governor.ca.gov 🧵
For real? The NFL wants to stop players from enjoying themselves too much?
Barry using Gary as a pillow
Listen, if you need a pick-me-up during these sad & scary times, head on over to Instagram and watch videos of people trying not to laugh in church
This is how you stand up to authoritarianism - by fighting for the targeted people, not by throwing them overboard.
Not only did I make my own sushi, I drove myself to the E.R.
I think James Dobson was directly responsible for a lot of the anger and cruelty displayed by so many self-identified Christian MAGAs. May his poisonous influence on families be buried with him.
I spent the 2010's arguing with my white colleagues that we were facing a crisis in newsroom diversity. The smart, dedicated, talented cis white journalists I thought of as my friends didn't want to hear it. Most of them ignored me. At least one of them told me to go to hell.
i'll say it again, my loud and vigorous support for any democrat who calls for televised hearings and criminal charges for everyone involved in DOGE. this guy should never be able to live in peace again.
this is the future liberals want
Dreaming of bedeviling people by going where he’s not supposed to go and sitting just out of reach 💗💗💗💗💗💗
just thinking about it makes me so angry. the worst kind of open race baiting in american politics since george wallace.
Just remembering the time Barry bedeviled someone who accidentally let him outside. Sat in a bush with just his feet sticking out for a solid 15 minutes. King shit.
“The daily cost of the D.C. troop deployment is more than six times what it would cost to operate affordable housing for D.C.’s entire unhoused population. The government’s priorities could not be more clear," said @hannahomestead.bsky.social of @nationalpriorities.bsky.social
I refuse to believe we are going to relitigate slavery. SLAVERY. It’s too much.
If you want to put back statues and memorials and names of Confederate traitors while tearing down museum exhibitions on slavery because they don't show the greatness of the nation... the nation whose history you're celebrating is whiteness. The kind of nationalist you are is a white nationalist.
much easier to understand the sheer bloody intensity of the civil war when you have a good grasp on just how terrible slavery was.
I remember as a kid wondering what 2025 would look like. We all speculated flying cars, robots doing work... Never would I have imagined the world got completely stupid as we are now. We can see the problems, there are solutions to the problems, but we don't act. Why? Because greed won't let us.
There is no moral equivalence between bullies and the bullied, between tyranny and democracy, or between brutality and decency. No individual can be free in a society devoid of justice. There can be no liberty where brutality reigns.
Agreed. I want to be happy he’s aggressively trolling Trump & MAGA but the way he gleefully dehumanizes homeless people is sociopathic.
I really don't try to yuck anyone's yum, but all this Newsom stuff has real "That Week Everyone Was Horny For Michael Avenatti" vibes
if the rage-bait works too well it might be fake ::clap clap:: if the rage-bait works too well it might be fake ::clap clap:: look, we’ve all been fooled before when a deep-fake makes us sore but kindly doublecheck your source, it might be fake ::clap clap::
“Uber received a report of sexual assault or sexual misconduct in the United States almost every eight minutes on average between 2017 and 2022. So, the total number for that period is 400,181. That is much more than what the company has publicly disclosed.”
“Putin would eat you for lunch.” Today, exactly that happened.
#booksky
The "oh you won't compromise and abandon [marginalized group]? enjoy the nazi takeover!" argument rings pretty fucking false when you consider that the horrors of a nazi takeover begin with the abandonment of marginalized groups.
Macey hugging one of her stuffed squirrels. We love to see it.
Imagine if they’d had sandwiches. 🥪
Damn, Wendy’s.
[from bathroom floor] I’m good how are you
Ya boy Gary has fucking HAD IT
There’s a certain type of person that can only respond to something bad currently happening by going “things have been bad for a long time!” Ok? Congratulations? If you get food poisoning do you go “this is nothing compared to the Challenger exploding”?
The President cannot commandeer any local law enforcement. The President does not run the Smithsonian. The monthly BLS jobs report is required by law. Release the Epstein files. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Science is slow, flawed, and full of dead ends—but it’s also the best hope we’ve ever had. It turns questions into answers, superstition into understanding, wonder into solutions.
To condemn the poor and homeless is to blaspheme against Christ
It’s a truly bananas movie. Glad you liked it! 🙂💗
Alan Dershowitz Sues Farmers Market Vendor For Refusing To Sell Him Child
the intensity of my anger at those who would criminalize the homeless — a population literally created by the greed and callousness of the ruling class — is very hard to contain. it was you who dismantled the safety net. if you don’t like the results, put it back
going through it (the neighbor’s trash)
Barry came in to join me, Macey, and Gary napping but sneezed and woke us all up instead
There are too many spiders in Los Angeles. Every time I see a spider in my house it’s a completely different type of spider than I have ever seen before. What are we doing guys? There should be no more than 12 types of spiders MAX
There's no rule that says a dog can't be a priest
So true 🙏💗
And part of the reason it's so hard to grasp is that so many of the prominent people who have figured it out aren't willing to say it out loud in public.
Arriving en masse in a nondescript rental truck is a tactic white supremacist agitators have recently developed www.npr.org/2022/06/11/1...
No shade to Simon and Theodore though they’re talented too
FAIR POINT BUT ALVIN IS THE BEYONCÉ OF THE GROUP AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT
Hegseth and trump's vision of american history is more or less one where it's illegal to teach that a non-white person ever did anything good or that a white person ever did anything bad
For my money, this is the most striking part
At an event commemorating the 200th birthday of the United States, a sitting Supreme Court Justice was invited to celebrate "the memory of the Founders and the document they drafted in Philadelphia." Justice Thurgood Marshall declined
ALVIN HAS BEEN WORKING IN THE MUSIC INDUSTRY SINCE HE WAS A CHILD YOU NEED TO PUT SOME RESPECT ON HIS NAME
Climbing out of the back of a rental truck, so you can chase down day laborers looking to do some roofing work or whatever, all while wearing your little cowboy hat. Come on, hoss, there's got to be another way to live out your midlife crisis that isn't so pathetically sad.
Some of my colleagues who are currently crying online about TX Democrats leaving the state are the same ones who left D.C. early so they wouldn’t have to vote on releasing the Epstein Files. Kind of interesting how that works, huh?
Got Macey a new bed to make up for the stress of moving. Honest to god I can’t stand how cute she is 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗
let me throw some fuel on the fire that is the discourse about boys getting laid!!! current-day manopshere content is not good at getting boys laid and that's an effect of the incentives at play. you cannot build an audience of resentful little virgins if you succeed at helping them to have sex
Macey’s review of my driving skills
it’s sooo easy to get laid. of course i know how to do it. let’s just all say how to get laid out loud at the same time for fun though
I’ve never seen Wicked, but the premise of The Wizard Of Oz is that the whole thing was a dream, so Wicked is just like, “Hey guess what, that dream also has a backstory”?
This reminded me that I was well into adulthood before I understood Dorothy dreamt the whole thing. I thought the adults back home just didn’t believe she went to Oz because they were hiding in the storm cellar the whole time she was gone.
goddamn this guy is good
They ask why Black people can’t get ahead, meanwhile several times in American history Black communities were massacred for being prosperous.
Whether it's students at Oberlin asking for trigger warnings or the Department of Justice opening an investigation into George Mason faculty who criticize Trump, both sides have taken brazen steps to limit free speech at universities.
the US profoundly needs a children's rights movement. children are not property... they deserve opportunity and learning and autonomy and security.... and our country just does not acknowledge this
And you’re trying to tell me this is a real guy
"It's ok, honey. The Sears Tower experiencing a blackout won't hurt you!" The Sears Tower experiencing a blackout:
NEW— "A lot of children have passed the point of no return...The gut lining has started to auto-digest & will no longer [absorb] water or nutrition. Death is imminent for 1000s" An American doctor who just returned from Gaza on where US-Israeli policy is taking us: www.huffpost.com/entry/gaza-s...
The first kitty to fall in love with Rosie was named Henry. He was born with feline leukemia and only lived a year. Gary & Barry came after him, and Macey came after Rosie. Every single one of them is the best there’s ever been 💗💗💗💗💗
Two leading Israeli human rights groups said on Monday that Israel was committing genocide against Palestinians in Gaza. Their announcement was the first time major Israeli rights groups have publicly concluded that the Gaza war is a genocide. Read more: https://nyti.ms/3J4IfyE
All I think about when I hear people say that it’s bad taste to dance on Hulk Hogan’s grave is that Emmett Till’s monument had to be replaced with a 500lb steel bulletproof monument because white people simply won’t stop riddling it with bullets. So now it just has tons of dents. From bullets.
🙂💗
