Now would be a good time for you to resign in disgrace.
Video game guy. Coffee achiever. Pre-Crisis refugee.
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Now would be a good time for you to resign in disgrace.
The last sentence of Mr. Jefferies’s skeet is so ironic that Alanís Morrisette just slapped her forehead and exclaimed “ohhh, now I get it.”
For karaoke? If you’ve got the pipes, Thunderball and Skyfall are way up there, no doubt. If you’re good at reinterpreting, Live and Let Die and No Time to Die work well. NTtD gets bonus points for the sudden “Surprise, Billie Eilish can belt when she wants to” moment.
Thank goodness you weren’t looking up whether Mary’s dress sways or waves in “Thunder Road” - you probably would’ve broken Google entirely.
Well, there were those gentlemen in the Shining, but I’m pretty sure that was a Kubrick embellishment. Do hedge animals count?
To be fair, they appear to be working on it.
Hep! and its follow-up, With a Little Hep From My Friends
It's more of a Shelbyville idea, anyway.
There’s “I’m due to win the MegaMillions this week” delusional. There’s “I still have a shot with Taylor Swift” delusional. But these pale in comparison to the level of delulu that this particular writer has achieved. It’s actually rather impressive. And also sad.
To be fair, “Useless Tool” is Schumer’s middle name.
Bonus points to the rando who broke out the Gollum voice.
It’s a riff on the opening of many lame 80’s comedies, in which there would be a freeze frame, accompanied by a record scratch, and the lead character asking the question in out posts.
There should be an AI account that’s entirely dedicated to generating obvious punchline posts in response to low-hanging set-up lines. I’d be oh so happy if computers took that job from me.
“You may be wondering how I got here.” - Dr. Monarez, probably.
Shame.
Those are, to quote the bard, rookie numbers.
I read that as building a bridge *out* of Cuomo, and suddenly wondered why we were trying to prove that he was a witch.
Strong Chanandler Bong energy.
Conspiracies and cat videos, but primarily... www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTJv...
This Sifl and Olly reboot doesn’t appear to be crescent fresh.
This is Sigmund erasure.
Increase a Band The Almighty Mighty Bosstones They Are Most Definitely Giants Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Jupiter Staff Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band Bigger Country Katrina and the Tsunamis
Gavin's my governor, and I appreciate him for what he is - a no-holds-barred political street fighter who will do whatever it takes to win the day. He's an absolute monster to have on your side. But he *is* a monster, make no mistake. Eye him warily at all times.
With all due respect (ie less and less with each passing day), endorse Mamdani or embrace irrelevancy.
Dude.
Slightly Diminish a Band Just as Good as Ezra Multiple Choice Test Dummies They Might Be Marginally Taller than Average The Mighty Bosstones Toad the Somewhat Damp Sprocket Diana Ross and the Value Meals The Vice Presidents of the United States of America Pearl Vegemite Men at Paid Time Off
As an Oakland-adjacent resident, I feel secure in saying that it would be unadvisable to attempt that shit up in here.
Cathedral of Liberalism is the name of my 200 person Woody Guthrie/Pete Seeger tribute choir.
While there is something to be said for critiquing the blue sky* proposals of idealistic politicians like Mamdani, there is much more to be said about the absolute white-knuckle wagon-circling terror they inflict on the billionaire class. The latter, imho, far outweighs the former. * So to speak.
There really needs to be a word for that moment when your suspicion that someone online is just doing a bit goes from 49% to 51%.* That said, Vonnegut’s warning about who we pretend to be remains undefeated. * “Derpiphany?”
Well yeah, the leap from “current AI seems to be a bit naff and probably shouldn’t be crammed into everything quite yet” to “AI is an abomination that must be strangled like baby Hitler” is a more than a little Beamonesque. Still, my eyebrow of extreme skepticism remains arched. Arched, I say!
I think you could probably combine those last three or four…
I think the distrust comes from the fact that AI has proven to be actually quite good at some rather esoteric tedious tasks (eg creating art for PowerPoint presentations), but has also shown itself to be notoriously unreliable with 4th grade-level history (today’s viral example).
Urban legend has it that, when obliged to spend time together on extended family vacations, their shirtbirdiness cycles eventually synch up.
Well, that should be a huge boost to Cuomo's efforts, what with Trump being so beloved in NYC 'n' all... But seriously, fuck this guy.
Nah man, steer into it. At this point I solidly believe that I get most of my foot-in-the-door interviews because someone wants me to regale them with stories of The Before Times When We Had To Send Our Sprites Down The Hallway To The Rendering Floor By Carrier Pigeon.
Best I can get you right now is a crate of free-floating existential angst. Gently used, of course.
I read “mushroom, mushroom,” as “mushroom mushroom,” and now I have the Badger Song in my head. Trump is a snake, ooh, he’s a snake.
Or, in a few cases, books to the face. Preferably Oxford Unabridgeds
My impression that there’s been exponentially more “conversation” about this “conversation” than the actual “conversation” itself. Maybe try covering some actual fires, instead of random sources of heat, NPR?
I’m thankful for the reminder. Even as terminally online as I am, I’d somehow memory-holed him before his latest round of “juicy gossip that conveniently confirms my priors” popped up. Yeah, he’s not a credible source.
After you get past ennui, schadenfreude, bemusement, and topography, a cheerful badger will give you a power up! Or maybe those are the meds.
Nonevent Horizon Phantom of the Light Opera Dead Tired Zone Two Thousand Minivacs! Silent Night, Medley Night #MildHorro
Ugh. That's all I got. Ugh.
It's what plants crave.
Oh, and Ewan MacGregor as Ewan McTeagle.
With Tilda Swinton as Teddy Salad and Kate Winslet as Anne Elk.
On my leisurely social media hero's journey from "shitposting grenade thrower" to "almost reasonable human being," I'm somewhere in the middle of the "don't instantaneously join in dogpiles" step. It's been a struggle.
Ooh, that’s a potentially good bit of bar trivia - multi-generational action figure actors. Hammils, Fishers, ‘n’ who else?
Iguanas are Zeppelin. Ferrets are the Tubes. Monkeys are the Who, not the Monkees, who are hamsters.
"Quirky?" Anyone describing Peter Thiel as "quirky" needs to be slapped repeatedly with a thesaurus.
“One does not simply take the 1:30 Blue Line into Mordor.”
Yeah, that one properly did me in. And you just know that Gunn had that bit in his back pocket ever since the first movie. Bastard.
Hold on - are you saying there’s a connection between Ben and Glory?
Pete Ross, mermaids… young Clark was definitely making the rounds.
This is bad journalism, and everyone involved with publishing it should feel bad and/or consider seeking out a new profession. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
While I enjoy Green Day, my enjoyment is exclusively limited to their uptempo songs. Slow pseudo-punk psucks. (It helps if you read that last sentence in Strongbad’s voice)
It’s weird, but all those songs have circled all the way back around for me from “crap” to “actually kind of enjoyable.” But, musically, I am rather basic. “Built This City,” however, remains unforgivable.
I thought that was what Lois was for. Heyooooo! (I’m so, so sorry)
Dave Gilmour-like typing detected.
I concur. This Epstein kerfuffle is providing a very convenient off-ramp for both Bongino and Patel, if they’re smart enough to take it. Which is, of course, the crux of the problem - neither gentleman is, to put it delicately, graced with the intelligence that God gave a chipmunk.
I’ve been reliably informed that it only had one ball.
Blast Hardcheese!
Could we arm them all with rusty sporks, the lock them in a room for about a week?
I think it’s some sort of adult diaper for aging white supremicists.
“After much deliberation, I’ll be eating this triple pepperoni pizza on biblical grounds.”
Way to stay on top of breaking news, NYT. I eagerly await your review of the latest Indiana Jones movie, as well as your opinions on the new mp3 players.
Back when my family lived in Pasadena (1st - 3rd grade), we went to Disneyland often enough that I got to know the tunnels really well. They were insanely uncontrolled. The Disney of today would never permit such chaos.
It's only a matter of time before one of them starts shouting "fireball! fireball!"
Oh no, they didn't go under the river... that would be insane (esp in so cal with the eathquakes 'n all). They went to the shoreline on the island - but they were mazelike, and intersected with the giant rock tower. Great place to get lost or make out.
The TSI at WDW is a bit naff. The one at Disneyland, however, is an essential "let your little kids run around for an hour to blow off steam" attraction. As an old fart, I miss the old tunnels at the Disneyland version, which ran all the way from the fort to the shoreline. Kids got LOST, man.
I did my duty. I believe I may have used the word "nazi" more times than Mel Brooks's original draft for "Springtime for Hitler."
I’d be willing to bet that you could paint the bottom half blue and stencil in “Auschwitz” in under a minute.
Everyone’s pretty much covered this, but yeah: A) Tutorialize as you go, but B) Provide some way of reviewing everything. Of course, these days my tutorials are basically, “smack the fish, dummy,” so whadoiknow?
Now that is a sign begging to be stolen and replaced by someone with some creative skills.
The phrase “ fuck yourself and the horse you road in on” is used far too freely these days, and yet it seems so appropriate in this case.
Aside from any number of movies I’ve seen gazillions of times on tv/vhs/dvd (Holy Grail, Superman, Wrath of Khan, etc.), there are a handful of movies I’ve seen in theaters at least a six times, including Rocky Horror, and the original Star Wars (I was 10 in ‘77).
For a brief time, the use of "sportsball" was a genuinely funny and self-deprecating way to signal that you knew little, and cared less, about sports. I believe it was a Tuesday. Now it's just kind of sad. I'd say "cringe," but that's also a word that's sort of crawled up its own tailpipe.
Old Me would've jumped all over that like William Perry on a Hungry Man Dinner. And by "Old Me," I mean "The Me of About Six Months Ago." Blocking is fun.
Props for using the proper Earth.
TACO TOWN!
If only you were in a position to do something about this...
At the risk of jinxing things, one of the small pleasures of this site as compared to The Dumb Place is that I'm exposed to far fewer "yelling fire in a crowded theater" comments. Slowly, the hive mind is learning.
What interests are people uncomfortable talking about here? Macrame? Religious themes in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Ketchup on hot dogs?
We loved it, although we did get a chuckle out of playing the "which cheesy 80's power ballad is going to being sung slowly by a breathy female artist at the end of THIS episode" game. I mean, it was thematically appropriate, but as a musical trope it's way beyond its sell date.
I always read "The Los Angeles Angels" with a built-in stadium echo, like "Now batting (batting)... Manny Mota (Mota)..."
I trust Gavin to do the right thing whenever doing so enhances his long term political ambitions. As such, I find it heartening that such an overtly political creature has decided to meet this moment so forcefully.
And by “violence,” you’re talking about ICE, right, Senator? Don’t both sides this shit.
If only there was someone in the state of California is a position to do anything about it. Do you know anyone like that, Governor?
While I always appreciate a Samuel L. Jackson callback, I've often wondered why "hold on to your butts" is considered sound advice in a pending crisis. It seems that, if stuff is about to go down, your butt would be pretty low on the list of "things to secure." I mean, it's not going anywhere.
In a follow up column, Ms. Kahn goes on to argue that Democrats should shove red hot pokers into their eyes, play in traffic, and hook up with that sweaty guy at the end of the bar with the dead, doll-like eyes.
At this point, I have to assume that Senator Collins intentionally uses the word "concern" because the eye-rolling it generates is one of the few things in life that can still bring her a scintilla of happiness.
Oh great, now AI's are writing spaghetti-logic opinion pieces to justify their existence... What's that, a human wrote this? Christ, I guess we *are* doomed, then.
It’s funny… I always heard that they’re supposed to be served in bowls, not bags. Is this a regional thing, like bubblers?
It was Citizen Kane!
Gailing Takes me away to an alternative reality Just an simple question posed innocently Why can't they all see? (Side note: Is it just me or are the original lyrics, like, really bad?)
Especially if it could turn them inexplicably into a giant rubber duck.
We represent The Shitty Miniatures Guild The Shitty Miniatures Guild The Shitty Miniatures Guild And as we represent the Shitty Miniatures Guiiiiiiild We'd like to welcome you to D&D
1. “Must-read” is, as the kids say, doing a lot of heavy lifting here. 2. That sure is a lot of codswollop to say “I just can’t be bothered to support certain oppressed minorities.” 3. I concur with the majority of respondents who are encouraging the author to vigorously fuck himself.
If Mr. Cillizza possessed a scintilla of cunning, I would be wondering whether he was intentionally trying to get his Nazimobile wrecked, both for the insurance and for the future clickbait. Fortunately, "cunning" isn't really in Mr. C's wheelhouse, so I'm free to wonder about other things.