'kin hell
'kin hell
Urgh. It's such a good place and full of heart. These cunts don't realise they're being played.
Being surveyed about your girlfriend
"The stamp duty land tax was calculated using the HMRC calculator" Well that's your first mistake.
Every day is a school day. Great thread.
Was thinking just the same this morning when an O'Neill meme popped up - genuinely hadn't given him a thought in forever until then.
Loving the Kaitlyn Aurelia Smith
Tip top
"I'm not tolerant of people who I believe are coming here to take the mickey" 👀
These remnants of a bowl of guacemole are proving unfathomably hard to finish off armed only with Walkers French Fries.
Well who got to the biscuits before me, huh?
The BTL Guardian feed was mostly despairing for their LGBTQ fans, if that helps
Well, let's get the bad news over first. Got a parking fine in Aberdeen yesterday.
"my dad was a flag."
Tilted my office chair backwards and now can't get the bloody thing to return to upright. Maybe it's telling me it's nap-time.
always good to check the edit history on Twitter as they can sometimes be revealing What Douglas Carswell has written today is awful bad in its final form, but his original tweet was worse He's not correcting a typo "From Epping to the sea, let's make England immigrant free" just showed his hand
![Douglas Carswell @DouglasCarswell From Epping to the sea, let's make England Abdul free 5h [Quote tweet @GBPolitics] NEW: Epping locals vow to stop paying council tax after the High Court ruled that asylum seekers can stay in a hotel [@DailyMail] Last edited 1:27 PM · Aug 31, 2025 60.9K Views](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:2kf2qj56o2vq7jfaq4x4ogp6/bafkreiaumorv4doqx6ozqqxlsrvs4rne3cuqiyetljv3cdwozck6vszoxq@jpeg "Click to view full size")
![Douglas Carswell @DouglasCarswell From Epping to the sea, let's make England immigrant free [Quote tweet] @GBPolitics *NEW: Epping locals vow to stop paying council tax after the High Court ruled that asylum seekers can stay in a hotel [@DailyMail] 1:25 PM Aug 31, 2025 509 Views There's a new version of this post. See the latest post](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:2kf2qj56o2vq7jfaq4x4ogp6/bafkreihz7cel6hmysoidvh5whqaenwplsnan2nabdaega3dc6rmdzunree@jpeg "Click to view full size")
From his mansion in Minneapolis or Minnesota or wherever it is he's plying his libertarian balm
The original notion that HMRC would provide free filing software should have been retained, without a doubt.
As a resident of a small town which has been bestowed with a Patriotic Roundabout this hits hard
Did someone on their bench just get sent off?!! #coyp
"Pat, why do you carry that ridiculous 600mm lens on long hikes?" Buddy, I can see mountains reflected in the eyes of a trailside pika.
I saw someone painting a red cross on some white dog poo earlier. Made me proud. And nostaligic.
*applause*
I mean, I shouldn't have laughed but...
My working theory was NFTs was a trial run on operating without shame
*wry laughter* Rich pickings for @mascotsilence.bsky.social though, so silver linings and all that.
I think their 8 foot tall defence and eleven behind the ball dictated Edouard being brought on...
Gaah, if only they graded GCSEs by letter
I mean, Michael *appears* better at pointing?
The man re-tweets Yaxley-Lennon
Strictly-speaking, from the employer's perspective, a tronc scheme is an Employer's NI dodge. The tax is the individual's liability, whether salary or tips. Re-reading it I see what you were getting at. The employee tax is never the employer's cost though, just their duty to deduct and pay over.
"The full £1.60 price increase can go to staff tax-free through the tipping system. This means 47% more money for staff without the pub operator having to pay anything extra to HMRC" It's NI free not tax-free, Jim - even cash tips are taxable on the individual (their responsibility to declare them)
Companies House - one of the better online agencies generally - still requiring a physical cheque to accompany some forms in 2025 is just remarkable.
Iso Forty Five is here. All things H.O.U.S.E that I'm loving at the minute, with bang up to date tracks, and as always, the odd classic gem thrown in for good measure. Shares much appreciated. Spread the love ✊ www.mixcloud.com/deandeep/dea...
Just before it gets too hot. Perfect.
Do you have a contingency plan? My daily scent of perhaps two decades was abruptly taken off sale and I've been a bit all at sea since...
Ha ha ha.
Yeah, I was about to say it will have been '97. If we won. '96 if we lost.
Probably your first game since Gazza's spectacular in 1996..?!? Do you *only* watch games at Wembley?
*gasps*
Very much enjoyed Robert Jenrick filming himself telling people they should pay for using the tube.
You mis-spelled 'racist'
why aren’t Tory MPs next jobs simply in cyber
I mean, that seems astonishing but you're already two lines beyond what's acceptable
Croydon and Bromley councils' social media damage limitation, of how shit our victory parade is (who knows which of them it might be down to), is hilarious. Don't fret people, Palace are well capable of fucking it up whatever the circumstances.
"If one actually did a survey on this sort of thing nationally" This has been done, trans people are disproportionately found in the most deprived areas of the country. transsafety.network/posts/study-...
It's chaos.
Huzzah!
A shame (for him) that you can't Substack in green ink.
Nicely, our kid - appreciate it. And looking forward to the Community Shield now obviously x
#HMRC are regularly writing off £10 or £20 of credit interest on my clients' corporation tax accounts as a 'permanent overpayment', rather than crediting it to the subsequent accounting period. Seems a bit like theft?
Nicely
I mean, all credit Everton - that's how you do it.
Sad. But as you say at the end, that's football. Big up Wardy
This is bullshit. You can say there are costs, you can even claim the costs outweigh the benefits. But to say that immigration has caused incalculable damage is not just hugely offensive to millions of people and their families, but simply empirically demonstrably wrong
this is not an exaggeration
Oh my. Thank you.
Orbital - The Girl With The Sun In Her Head Nowt better to have to lie down in a hot field to because you "feel a bit fuzzy"
My earliest memory of my mum actually being a woman and not just a mum is her expressing her adoration of the man. And he is pretty hot, to be fair to mum.
The Conclave, now they've closed the doors
I was once rumbled by a teacher having sellotaped several biros together to 'write lines', back in the day when writing lines was a punishment (do they still do that)
Fukka Khan won't you tell me what you wanna do? Do you feel for me the way I feel for you? Fukkaka Khan, let me tell you what I wanna do I wanna love you, wanna hug you, wanna squeeze you, too
Look for the smoke coming from Tasty Jerk just outside Selhurst Park - they're usually first to know.
I’m not overtly suggesting racism, but I find it VERY interesting that neither Mr Boombastic or Mr Loverlover were accepted into the Mr Man franchise
Because if I wanted someone to confidently make up answers to my questions I would simply ask a man
Encouraging, given some of the Everton chants from not many years prior :-/
Unsurprisingly, the FA shows itself to be full of shit once again. What a nonsense. "our role is to make football accessible to as many people as possible" Oh ay? Just not *those* 20 amatuers.
Just had this from HMRC: "I just checked the timescales ... for an OPR received 27/08/24 the reply is expected by 18 November 2025" 👀
Well, durr.
THIS is what I've missed. Go on, sir....
Broken, surely?
And an honourable mention in today's PopBitch newsletter!
Just noticed that the drop-down box on one of our tax calculators gives 'No/Aye' for the Scottish taxpayer question :D
A few weeks ago, the nephew of a friend of ours died suddenly. Faizaan was a passionate Palace fan who attended matches with his uncle. He was just 24 years old. To commemorate him, we would love it if you could applause in the 24th minute of Saturday’s game. RIP Faizaan.
Ah, I'm sorry man.
Octopussy
Southampton is on Wednesday next week, no? ;-)
Doing it right #conman
Software supplier: " We think you'd like to switch to our cloud solution - you can do this and that" Go on... Software supplier: "annual cost based on your current client profile will be £4,950 + VAT" I paid £689 for desktop last year, with functionality they haven't programmed for the cloud yet.
That becomes quite the flight without the Miami stop, but I think it wise.
"I presume you support" doesn't sound like the pointy-laughy-guys I know
I like their stuff - the pastrami is great for a New Yorker
Surprised to hear that it's not already listed, and that it's failed recently to be listed. An integral part of Croydon's skyline through the 70s and 80s, though outmuscled since.
You're paying them to enable them to chase people that haven't paid them. I think.
Until today I had missed the detail that Nick Clegg made £100M - ONE HUNDRED MILLION POUNDS - working at Facebook. (To put that in context, it's the same figure he pledged in British aid for Syria in 2013.) Good morning, I hate everything again.
Yes Probably
Our local Co-op stocks those, if that's an option? Your local being an option I mean, not mine. Unless...
Must. Avoid. Tasting. Too. Early. When. Considering. "Is that spicy enough?"
It’s weird that MPs are being paid by a member of a foreign government & it goes by without comment
What about the octopus that predicts world cup results?
Well that is good news ;-)
I'd first ask the rice truck/brother in law story guy from Twitter
Just got the rates bill for my office
Infuriating that my 14yo is finally developing musicial tastes of her own, but ofc all the artists are big hitters so every gig is either sold out or £200 a pop or (usually) both. She gets to a couple of little festivals each year with me, but the opportunity of a mega-gig seems remote these days.
"Why aren't kids reading any more?" "Because the only books aimed at them are written by David Walliams and called something like 'Granny Fart's Massive Christmas Bottom Burp'."
Knee-slide required. It's the law
