frankly it is unacceptable that parenthood requires you to be something other than a slack-jawed zombie in the morning and do things like “get the kids breakfast” and “walk them to school”
Replies
realizing this morning, of all mornings, that i'd run out of coffee...help
sep 2, 2025, 2:59 pm • 4 0 • view
Oh no
sep 2, 2025, 6:09 pm • 1 0 • view
agreed, it's entirely unreasonable
sep 2, 2025, 6:20 pm • 0 0 • view
get up earlier and earlier to beat them at their own game
sep 2, 2025, 2:42 pm • 4 0 • view
That's not beating them, that's joining them
sep 2, 2025, 2:46 pm • 7 1 • view
that’s what they want you to think!
sep 2, 2025, 2:47 pm • 1 0 • view
I struggle to dress myself in the morning and now I have to dress myself and two OTHER human beings? All before I have caffeine? WTF.
sep 2, 2025, 2:44 pm • 6 0 • view
they should train dogs to watch kids, and when you give different whistles the dog escorts the kid to the correct room and a different whistle-sound … will remind the kid to get this item out of this box and so on, the dogs and young kid hands should help move things around like it is a “song”
sep 2, 2025, 2:53 pm • 3 0 • view
Honestly it was really helpful when California shifted to providing free lunches for all school kids bc then we could take “make lunch and snack” off our morning list.
sep 2, 2025, 2:45 pm • 9 0 • view
Alas my child hates the school lunch And so they get the same “fling some stuff in a bento” lunch every day instead
sep 2, 2025, 2:47 pm • 2 0 • view
Time honored method and your kids are fed. Outstanding!
sep 2, 2025, 2:51 pm • 3 0 • view
see we’re 50/50 on that because the five year old will generally eat school lunch but the eight year old we have to make lunch for sometimes because if he doesn’t like the school lunch he will just not eat anything and he badly needs the food
sep 2, 2025, 2:48 pm • 9 0 • view
That’s fair. Just bc they provide it doesn’t mean every kid can eat it. And I will admit that we had to resume food prep when my kid got braces and couldn’t chew many of the basic offerings but it was nice while it lasted.
sep 2, 2025, 2:50 pm • 5 0 • view
"what do you mean i have to make you snacks for school? didn't i do that yesterday?"
sep 2, 2025, 2:42 pm • 38 0 • view
it’s like dishes! you keep having to do it!
sep 2, 2025, 2:43 pm • 31 0 • view
a self filling lunch box i'm offering a 5% stake for 10 million
sep 2, 2025, 2:44 pm • 11 0 • view
... Only a 200MM valuation, for something as life-changing as that?
sep 2, 2025, 3:22 pm • 0 0 • view
Laundry is my Achilles. I do the dishes because I hate laundry. My wife does the laundry because she hates dishes
sep 2, 2025, 3:56 pm • 1 0 • view
sep 2, 2025, 2:46 pm • 40 3 • view
my kids are adults now and i still haven't managed to catch up on either of these
sep 2, 2025, 2:49 pm • 7 0 • view
Honestly, I think monks have it right. "Everybody gets one habit and one bowl! That way we can spend a lot more time doing nothing. I mean meditating."
sep 2, 2025, 3:07 pm • 7 0 • view
And being silent while making incredibly mind bending booze if you joined the right monks!
sep 3, 2025, 6:47 am • 1 0 • view
It sucks even if you fill your kitchen with bars you can just fling in a bag!
sep 2, 2025, 2:49 pm • 3 0 • view
don’t get me started on the laundry hamper that instantly refills a you empty it.
sep 2, 2025, 3:13 pm • 2 0 • view
Instantly refills and yet the one acceptable pair of socks/shorts/whatever is somehow not in the hamper or the dresser.
sep 2, 2025, 3:14 pm • 2 0 • view
Then after that "do work"
sep 2, 2025, 3:16 pm • 1 0 • view
Meanwhile moderating any given social media to screen for inappropriate contact and users is a full time job
sep 3, 2025, 1:43 am • 0 0 • view
I'm child-free. I get to be a slack-jawed zombie ALL DAY.
sep 2, 2025, 2:43 pm • 2 0 • view
Both of my parents were factory workers. Even in grade school I got my own breakfast and walked myself to school. After school I walked myself home, and I was Latchkey before Latchkey was cool.
sep 2, 2025, 4:25 pm • 0 0 • view
I love having a 14yo who is pretty self-winding in the morning (though I'm not sure if he would be if we didn't homeschool) but I have a border collie who tells me in no uncertain terms how long it has been since we were last outside playing fetch and the legal limit is apparently 90 minutes.
sep 2, 2025, 4:59 pm • 2 0 • view
When a border collie wakes up in the morning, it has been approximately 12 hours since that dog last played fetch outside. That is far too great a gap in sessions, and must be rectified.
sep 2, 2025, 4:59 pm • 3 0 • view
I throw Pop Tarts and a jar of Nutella at mine. And if they're not in the car by 8:15, they've got an 18-hour shift at the salt mines waiting for them.
sep 2, 2025, 2:44 pm • 11 1 • view
Sometimes I scream "HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR FUCKING INDEPENDENCE NOW YOU LITTLE SHITS?" while I pelt them with sugary breakfast comestibles.
sep 2, 2025, 3:20 pm • 5 0 • view
Thank God for frozen waffles and peanut butter
sep 2, 2025, 3:51 pm • 2 0 • view
The lack of sick days is troubling, as well.
sep 2, 2025, 2:47 pm • 5 0 • view
My parents actually didn’t do any of that and my Mom honestly thinks she did a great job.
sep 2, 2025, 3:32 pm • 1 0 • view
Gives you a real understanding of the concept of “duty”.
sep 2, 2025, 3:06 pm • 1 0 • view
Yet another reason I am considering homeschool/hybrid learning. I am not a morning person, so if my kid isn't one either then I won't make them wake up so darn early
sep 3, 2025, 4:03 am • 0 0 • view
I am childfree (by choice) and I can barely get myself out the door, no idea how people do it with kids. especially older kids who screw around in the AM's and can't manage themselves
sep 2, 2025, 6:13 pm • 0 0 • view
Being a responsible adult is tough when your kids are satisfactorily programmed to do things like "get up", "go to the bathroom", and "put your clothes on" and yet refuse to do so when you are on the clock.
sep 2, 2025, 2:50 pm • 7 0 • view
It’s extra fun if you have a kid who is also a morning zombie
sep 2, 2025, 2:48 pm • 3 0 • view
Every night, my kid asks me what time I intend to get up in the morning. When I tell her, she's like "why can't you sleep in?"
sep 2, 2025, 2:44 pm • 11 0 • view
Do you just point at her?
sep 2, 2025, 2:46 pm • 7 0 • view
After the third or fourth time I started looking like Willem Dafoe in The Smile Man
sep 2, 2025, 2:54 pm • 5 0 • view
Having responsibilities really is tiring. I just don’t have the energy to hear about other people’s complaints anymore. All I hear is “blah blah blah”
sep 2, 2025, 2:57 pm • 4 0 • view
Every day
sep 2, 2025, 3:10 pm • 0 0 • view
Milk (or soy milk). A serving of powdered peanut butter. Cereal. Mix and serve? Just a thought.
sep 2, 2025, 6:08 pm • 0 0 • view
This is the primary reason I’m child free. I’m the auntie who will babysit and help with overnite shifts, but you’re on your fucking own for mornings.
sep 2, 2025, 5:26 pm • 1 0 • view
I was both happy and sad when, middle of last year (their first year in public school), my kids insisted they could walk to and from the bus stop without me. I mean, I still need to get up with the toddler and also get their lunches together, but... I don't have to leave the house if I don't wanna.
sep 2, 2025, 9:22 pm • 0 0 • view