So we log in and realize Adam has put a half dozen downer nu-metal songs in the queue, and mutually unite to spread the word of how the queue works, and work together to make sure that when a song ends, we bump a good song to the top
Replies
What you needed was one of those long vaudeville hooks from Looney Tunes to yank him off the stage
aug 27, 2025, 1:02 am • 3 0 • view
I entered into a brief fight with BETH, who tried to push herself ahead of our group TWICE with DISNEY SHOWTUNES need i remind you that we had ONLY AN HOUR for everyone to sing
aug 27, 2025, 12:48 am • 187 1 • view
at least Beth wasn't _also_ trying to sing Staind
aug 27, 2025, 12:55 am • 2 0 • view
Could be worse, could have been Hamilton
aug 27, 2025, 12:50 am • 1 0 • view
But the key was to scoot your preferred singer/song up at the very moment the last song ended, so you had to pay REAL CLOSE ATTENTION to bump people friends, it was BRUTAL COMPETITION
aug 27, 2025, 12:49 am • 217 2 • view
I am delighted to report that we got EVERYONE in the pro-abortion queue on stage within 40 minutes, no duds only bangers, because that is what COMMUNITY ORGANIZING looks like
aug 27, 2025, 12:50 am • 520 14 • view
drop the playlist my friend!!!
aug 27, 2025, 12:54 am • 1 0 • view
- Friends in Low Places (me, my favorite, a classic, always bangs) - Smooth - Pink Pony Club - No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems
aug 27, 2025, 12:58 am • 9 0 • view
3 icons and a new classic, songs everyone can sing along with you! this is how you do it (this is how you do it)
aug 27, 2025, 1:06 am • 2 0 • view
lol i nearly literally sang This Is How You Do It (which ALWAYS SLAPS)
aug 27, 2025, 1:09 am • 6 0 • view
I'm scared about the virtual queue era. a skilled KJ who can manage the room is worth their weight in gold. not everyone will be clutch like y'all, there will always be an Adam, from whom you might even enjoy the downer song sung badly - but Adam all night is a horror show with clown shoes
aug 27, 2025, 1:16 am • 3 1 • view
absolutely
aug 27, 2025, 1:17 am • 1 0 • view
I wish I was there for this, I would've banged out Rumor Has It by Adele and then monitored the queue for my folks like a hawk lol
aug 27, 2025, 2:00 am • 3 0 • view
hell yeah
aug 27, 2025, 2:02 am • 0 0 • view
When everyone in our fuck-Trump/hooray-abortion group had sang their bangers, we defected and fuckin ADAM closed out the rest of the night to ABSOLUTELY NO ONE singing like five duds in a row, culminating in an absolute decimination of Jeff Buckley's 'Hallelujah' that cleared out everyone else
aug 27, 2025, 12:52 am • 231 0 • view
There's fucking custom to karaoke. It was put in place long ago. This thread got me angry at Bachelor Party Dick
aug 27, 2025, 12:53 am • 8 0 • view
we live in a SOCIETY
aug 27, 2025, 12:58 am • 7 0 • view
Instant follow for this thread.
aug 27, 2025, 1:06 am • 2 0 • view
OMG NO. This song shouldn't even be an option on a Party Karaoke song list! At the same time, I'm having a lil fun imagining The Worst Debbie Downer song queue. Starting with Everybody Hurts - REM And a Grand Finale...
aug 27, 2025, 4:11 am • 1 0 • view
open.spotify.com/track/0tUELg...
aug 27, 2025, 4:11 am • 0 0 • view
ahahahahhaha
aug 27, 2025, 1:27 am • 1 0 • view
He should have just owned it and been like, "anyways, here's Wonderwall"
aug 27, 2025, 5:09 am • 1 0 • view
could have absolutely smashed it if so
aug 27, 2025, 5:09 am • 0 0 • view
That's a long long hour. Does time in Mexico go differently?
aug 27, 2025, 11:40 am • 0 0 • view
and look, I'll listen to a good karaoke version of 'Hallelujah' if the time is right, but THE TIME IS NEVER RIGHT FOR DOWNERS AT THE PARTY RESORT
aug 27, 2025, 12:53 am • 236 0 • view
We did ultimately and of course tip the hell out of the KJ, who did an incredible job trying to get people jazzed about Adam crying at the crowd for minutes at a time, but woof, that poor dude, I'm sure he has some amazing shit to tell his buddies about the goofy shit tourists get up to on vacation
aug 27, 2025, 12:56 am • 188 0 • view
My friend calls that Staind song "the sad stripper song" lol
aug 27, 2025, 12:57 am • 17 0 • view
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
aug 27, 2025, 12:58 am • 3 0 • view
I respect the logistical impetus of taking the queue out of the hands of a staffer who shouldn't be burdened w fucking w assholes and navigating whatever nonsense ensues, but if anything will bring me back to that resort (lots will, it was lovely) it's going back to ensure people know THE RULES
aug 27, 2025, 1:08 am • 165 0 • view
anyway the rules of karaoke are 1) no songs over 5 min, ideally under 4 2) no showtunes 3) no signing people up w/out consent 4) NO AMERICAN PIE (see rule 1) 5) NO SCENES FROM AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT (see rules 4, 1) 6) NO DOWNERS UNLESS YOU CAN KILL IT (and if you don't know, there's your answer)
aug 27, 2025, 1:16 am • 373 29 • view
...So "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" is right out, then.
aug 27, 2025, 3:13 am • 0 0 • view
if you're not the reincarnation of Marvin Lee Aday, you're not allowed
aug 27, 2025, 3:14 am • 0 0 • view
YES. American Pie is THE WORST karaoke song. I discovered that at our little neighborhood bar. I was the only one singing English-language tunes, and I went "OH, American Pie! I love that song!" While singing I discovered it's 8 ½ minutes long, w/ LOTS of boring repetition.
aug 27, 2025, 2:18 am • 6 0 • view
But you can't really appreciate just how bad a song American Pie is until you & your boyfriend pop into a random bar for a quick drink in downtown Indianapolis that turns out to be a strip club and an earnest stripper unexpectedly begins s-l-o-w-l-y disrobing to the world's most monotonous ear worm🤔
aug 27, 2025, 7:22 am • 3 1 • view
oh BLESS you can always tell when someone thinks AP is a great idea and then ends up with the slow, horrific realization dawning upon them of how long and boring it is
aug 27, 2025, 2:20 am • 3 0 • view
The only time witnessed brilliant Karaoke was a dude in Bulgaria rocking out Nothing Else Matters by Metallica. It breaks the five minute rule but it was awesome and so much better than the awful and repetitive Celine Dion and Mariah Carey songs
aug 27, 2025, 8:30 am • 0 0 • view
Does 4 also apply to The Saga Begins (which I realize is still technically in violation of 1, but is still much shorter than American Pie and does kill with a certain crowd)?
aug 27, 2025, 3:29 am • 1 0 • view
American Pie is only seven verses. If you can't emote enough to keep audience interest through seven verses (and the last one is a freebie anyway) you have no business singing American Pie.
aug 27, 2025, 4:22 am • 0 0 • view
ok this is gonna be controversial but i think weird al should be 7) no weird al
aug 27, 2025, 3:30 am • 2 0 • view
Last time I did SOB by Nathaniel Rateliff and Night Sweats and it fucking killed. The perfect karaoke song.
aug 27, 2025, 3:54 am • 3 0 • view
i looove to sing this one in the car
aug 27, 2025, 3:55 am • 2 0 • view
I still think of the woman I once saw who sang nothing but Aerosmith in a deadpan tone, including "Pink." She arrived alone, talked to no one.
aug 27, 2025, 2:41 am • 3 0 • view
an icon
aug 27, 2025, 2:49 am • 1 0 • view
I think number 2 is "be very careful with" rather than outright ban. Disney or Rocky Horror are showtunes but you're probably ok. "Memory" is probably fine. It's a minefield though.
aug 27, 2025, 7:47 am • 0 0 • view
My hot karaoke take is there should be karaoke versions of songs without overly long guitar solos and 13 repetitions of the refrain at the end.
aug 27, 2025, 2:22 am • 21 0 • view
I'd love to sing (along to) a karaoke friendly version of Free Bird, with just enough of the guitar solo at the end for some soul cleansing air guitar and head banging
aug 27, 2025, 3:56 am • 2 0 • view
You're correct!! I love to do "Friends in Low Places" but often KJs will put on the "live" version which is something like 8 minutes long with a guitar solo in the middle and it's the fuckin worst
aug 27, 2025, 2:24 am • 6 0 • view
There is also the obscure, unwritten rule that if there is a lounge version of a song it should take higher priority. Richard Cheese's cover of Gin and Juice tends to throw off the audience.
aug 27, 2025, 4:16 am • 1 0 • view
Ooo his down with the sickness is gonna be my next choice!
aug 27, 2025, 4:33 pm • 0 0 • view
There also needs to be max number of Evanescence/Linkin Park per hour limits.
aug 27, 2025, 3:18 am • 3 0 • view
I will say the most hype I have ever personally gotten a crowd is when my brother and I sang "Bring Me To Life" at a karaoke bar in Winter Park, Colorado. Several women complimented me in the bathroom. I think my brother might have signed someone's tits.
aug 27, 2025, 3:56 am • 2 0 • view
you're not wrong but this gets into KJ management rather than general rules, certainly any KJ worth their salt should be spacing out numetal/opera metal so that everyone doesn't just get fuckin exhausted
aug 27, 2025, 3:19 am • 2 0 • view
No Rickrolling?
aug 27, 2025, 3:52 am • 0 0 • view
rickrolls must be deployed with the utmost care and also the consent of the KJ
aug 27, 2025, 3:53 am • 1 0 • view
Okay I mostly agree with this but one time I saw a dude sing Piano Man the night before Thanksgiving in Austin and he brought his own harmonica and rocked the harmonica solos so I guess my addendum would be if you’re going plus 5 (pushing 6) you better have a hook and it better go hard as fuck.
aug 27, 2025, 2:56 am • 28 2 • view
Case in point: my showpiece is doing "La Vie Bohème" by myself, with all the voices. My range isn't quite what it used to be, but I've still got three full octaves in me and I'm damn well going to use them.
aug 27, 2025, 4:18 am • 1 0 • view
i'll allow it
aug 27, 2025, 2:57 am • 4 0 • view
I’ve had enough Bohemian Rhapsody in this lifetime too
aug 27, 2025, 1:08 pm • 0 0 • view
What's a good downer for you (in the right situation). Just curious.
aug 27, 2025, 5:07 am • 0 0 • view
But I just want to sing Paradise By the Dashboard Lights by Meat Loaf 😭😭😭😭
aug 27, 2025, 3:21 am • 0 0 • view
I’ve Been To Paradise But I’ve Never Been To Me, is my choice if we’re singing about paradise. youtu.be/SZgIk2b68gQ?...
aug 27, 2025, 3:32 am • 2 0 • view
No showtunes? Why not?
aug 27, 2025, 4:53 am • 0 0 • view
**cranks guerilla radio** Which is fun because the bridge is just long enough of two reps of a the chorus from another song on the same album, and always gets people a lil surprised when I go without words on screen XD
aug 27, 2025, 1:31 am • 2 0 • view
A bad singer doing a Great Karaoke song is always better than a good singer doing a Bad Karaoke song
aug 27, 2025, 3:29 am • 44 4 • view
Addendum: you would think the platonic ideal is "a good singer doing a great karaoke song" but it's *actually* "a decent-but-not-amazing singer doing a great karaoke song" because really good singers ruin the vibe for everyone.
aug 27, 2025, 4:13 am • 2 0 • view
Absolutely. I stan that girl who is singing her entire heart out and never even glances at the right note
aug 27, 2025, 4:10 am • 2 0 • view
10000000%
aug 27, 2025, 3:30 am • 2 0 • view
Good karaoke requires active consent
aug 27, 2025, 8:04 am • 0 0 • view
Rule number 4 didn't need the rule number 1 caveat.
aug 27, 2025, 6:19 am • 0 0 • view
also NO BULLYING YOUR FRIENDS WHO DON'T SING some of us are audience only and that's okay
aug 27, 2025, 2:45 am • 66 2 • view
my idea exactly
aug 27, 2025, 4:42 am • 0 0 • view
YES CORRECT
aug 27, 2025, 2:49 am • 6 0 • view
100% for this rule. I am still traumatized by Freshman Choir, a required course at my Catholic hs, where we spent the entire semester singing songs from Fiddler on the Roof. The final was to sing solo in front of the entire class - 98 other girls.
aug 27, 2025, 3:15 am • 0 0 • view
Blister in the Sun or Goodbye Earl--both easy to sing and the crowd loves to join in
aug 27, 2025, 2:22 am • 6 0 • view
I genuinely hate 'Blister in the Sun' as a song, like I'll turn it off if it's on the radio, but it slaps at karaoke every time
aug 27, 2025, 2:25 am • 2 0 • view
7. One Tenacious D song per night maximum
aug 27, 2025, 3:19 am • 5 0 • view
this is actually a good one, I loooove the D but it can't be a ... thing
aug 27, 2025, 3:20 am • 2 0 • view
Excellent rule.
aug 27, 2025, 3:47 am • 0 0 • view
oh god
aug 27, 2025, 3:20 am • 1 0 • view
I’m kinda sad about “no show tunes” but I grew up in Oklahoma. So it’s complicated.
aug 27, 2025, 1:18 am • 11 0 • view
I’d love to hear someone belt out Oklahoma at karaoke!
aug 27, 2025, 4:26 pm • 1 0 • view
Careful. Total Eclipse of the Heart is 5:34, and karaoke bars would go bankrupt without it.
aug 27, 2025, 1:17 am • 15 0 • view
100% the song I break the 5 minute rule for
aug 27, 2025, 6:00 am • 0 0 • view
I SAID WHAT I SAID* *i may have done total eclipse of the heart a time or two, whomst among us is without blame
aug 27, 2025, 1:19 am • 9 0 • view
I need you to know, that as a former KJ, American Pie represents a whole cigarette AND a piss break. Please consider the workers, comrade.
aug 27, 2025, 1:36 pm • 3 0 • view
Raising an anecdotal flag on #2, if only because there's been too many Rocky Horror/theater adjacent folks in my life who have had good song selection there.
aug 27, 2025, 1:58 am • 5 0 • view
It's wonderful to yell (the right things) at people singing Rocky Horror songs.
aug 27, 2025, 3:27 am • 2 0 • view
I don't doubt it, but for genpop, the rule applies
aug 27, 2025, 1:59 am • 2 0 • view
You could not be more wrong about rule 2. I got a straight up standing ovation from a room full of strangers singing “consider yourself” from OLIVER! (Please note that exclamation point is part of the title of the musical.) I was recognized on public transportation months afterwards by a stranger
aug 27, 2025, 3:03 am • 7 0 • view
Weird Al Polka-Style medley of American Pie / Scenes from an Italian Restaurant that clocks in at 4m30s?
aug 27, 2025, 4:37 am • 0 0 • view
i'm dying, if anyone on earth makes this exist they have to wait to perform it until i am present
aug 27, 2025, 4:38 am • 2 0 • view
I was once at an impromptu post-work karaoke room evening, and my friend Dave and I were K-I-L-L-I-N-G on a duet of Paradise By the Dashboard Light. Someone "accidently" pressed next song when we were about halfway through, and tbh, they were right to do it.
aug 27, 2025, 4:01 am • 4 0 • view
and see now, everyone plus y'all got to have the moment, but didn't have to live through the whole thing! a gift!
aug 27, 2025, 4:03 am • 2 0 • view
When I hosted a karaoke night years ago, I pulled a regular aside who had a great voice but always sang downer tunes. She was upset she didn't get better responses. I talked her into singing a banger, bar went wild. Next week she was right back to dirges.
aug 27, 2025, 1:26 am • 14 0 • view
youtu.be/UX0f92HXaCM?...
aug 27, 2025, 3:20 am • 0 0 • view
guhhhh well sometimes you can't talk people out of their worst ideas, bless you for trying
aug 27, 2025, 1:27 am • 6 0 • view
There are so many easy wins, why make it complicated Just bust a move or don't go chasing waterfalls,, don't overthink it
aug 27, 2025, 1:22 am • 4 0 • view
The only even plausible exemption to the four minute rule is leading a group sing of bohemian Rhapsody I'm sure they'll like it Everyone will appreciate it You're so novel What a good idea
aug 27, 2025, 1:25 am • 6 0 • view
7) No 'My Way' en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Way_...
aug 27, 2025, 3:25 am • 3 0 • view
LOLOLOL understatement of the year.
aug 27, 2025, 3:56 am • 0 0 • view
Frankly, no Sinatra at all, Philippines or not.
aug 27, 2025, 3:54 am • 1 0 • view
My personal rule is that I never judge someone's singing but I will always be judgy about song choice.
aug 27, 2025, 1:32 am • 15 1 • view
put this on a pillow!!
aug 27, 2025, 1:33 am • 3 0 • view
Went to karaoke with a first-time host. She was a drag queen and she was lovely...but she performed THREE or FOUR songs herself (two of them from Wicked!) before some people had even gone a first time! She was also doing unsolicited backup vocals! I tipped well and haven't been back.
aug 27, 2025, 1:32 am • 4 0 • view
i mean if the queue is light i don't mind if the KJ sings a bunch but taking up singing time up front??? NO
aug 27, 2025, 1:32 am • 5 0 • view
I know the "but MY SHOWTUNE is an exception" crowd will dislike this but the truth is NO SHOWTUNES AT KARAOKE i don't make the rules!!!!* *yes i do, you're breaking them
aug 27, 2025, 1:18 am • 243 3 • view
I made the mistake of singing Keith Sweat’s “I’ll Give All My Love To You” not remembering that it is 7 minutes long and during instrumental breaks I’d meekly mutter, “sorry,” and “wow, this song is long…”
aug 27, 2025, 4:36 am • 2 0 • view
Best song option I ever did see in a giant karoake list was an instrumental song from Cats.
aug 27, 2025, 1:29 am • 38 0 • view
I thought for sure this was going to involve a bad rendition of a Journey song, I'm glad I was wrong! My go to is "Crazy Little Thing Called Love", I have a mildly amusing Elvis rendition I used to do. This was all back when I still drank alcohol, so there's that too
aug 27, 2025, 4:11 am • 3 0 • view
You have just put the kibosh on every cast party and it must not stand
aug 27, 2025, 2:06 am • 7 0 • view
Public karaoke, fair enough, but hiring a karaoke room for you and several showtune friends, ALL showtunes all the time!
aug 27, 2025, 4:11 am • 1 0 • view
Query? Is “I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts” a show tune?
aug 27, 2025, 1:25 am • 1 0 • view
What about white people rapping? This used to be my thing but now it feels awkward. (We’re talking Baby Got Back, Humpty Dance, Baby Got Back..)
aug 27, 2025, 3:10 am • 1 0 • view
At the risk of asking a stupid question (I’ve only attended karaoke a couple times, and never sang), why no showtunes? Are people just less likely to pull it off?
aug 27, 2025, 3:21 am • 1 0 • view
ADAM
aug 27, 2025, 1:26 am • 7 0 • view
Rule 15: only sing rainbow connection if you can do all the muppets voices.
aug 27, 2025, 12:20 pm • 1 0 • view
Well I won't argue for an exception but I still remember a guy who killed at Ego's by doing "I Believe" from "The Book of Mormon" and had the entire crowd on his side because other choices were so vanilla
aug 27, 2025, 1:28 am • 13 0 • view
youtu.be/aYIwPu50Fic?... Have you seen this yet? Best music intrusion story ever!
aug 27, 2025, 1:26 am • 9 1 • view
YOU ARE HILARIOUS!! 😂
aug 27, 2025, 1:28 am • 1 0 • view
Also no "Paradise by the Dashboard Light." I do not care how much you love Meatloaf, it is not worth it to listen to you for 8 and a half minutes at karaoke.
aug 27, 2025, 4:15 am • 3 0 • view
Sweet Transvestite is a fantastic karaoke song.
aug 27, 2025, 7:02 am • 1 0 • view
I feel VERY STRONGLY about good karaoke, so much so that my husband and I literally had a karaoke wedding reception wherein we sang the song that brought us together—"Brandy" by the Looking Glass—because we both put it in at a 'roke night when we were dating and realized it was meant to be
aug 27, 2025, 2:00 am • 163 1 • view
So you're saying you wouldn't come to my karaoke party exclusively of Disney Show tunes if invited?!
aug 27, 2025, 2:18 am • 4 0 • view
this was a wild ride
aug 27, 2025, 1:50 am • 7 0 • view
You are one of the reasons why I'd never ever sing karaoke in public. The level of judgement is crazy, for rules I wouldn't know anyway. Private booth or never.
aug 27, 2025, 2:16 am • 10 0 • view
I just read this whole thing to my professional musician husband. Thank you for making him laugh so hard.
aug 27, 2025, 4:32 am • 3 0 • view
you've just reminded me of the time someone brought an air guitar competition to a screeching halt with the full version of Stairway to Heaven, I think he was still going when we got to our dorm room after a beer run (we were among the first to bail)
aug 27, 2025, 1:27 am • 27 1 • view
In HS, I knew this group of guys who sang “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” every week. They did all the parts. That song is 8 min long. And it was never funny.
aug 27, 2025, 4:01 am • 24 1 • view
So does KPop Demon Hunters count as showtunes?
aug 27, 2025, 5:11 am • 0 0 • view
Omg, yes. As someone who regularly ended up (somewhat reluctantly) at the same karaoke bar as the musical theater kids from UMich and EMich... good lord an amazing singer doing a show tune really well is somehow worse for the vibe than any amount of bad singing (except sadboi nu metal ballads, fr)
aug 27, 2025, 3:44 am • 11 0 • view
There ARE a handful of exceptions to the “no showtunes” rule, but they are pretty much all found in Grease. They do NOT include every song in Grease.
aug 27, 2025, 1:29 am • 2 0 • view
You can pry my Popeye songs from my cold, dead hands! I yam what I yam!
aug 27, 2025, 2:14 am • 7 0 • view
I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS SHOWTUNES ERASURE 😤
aug 27, 2025, 3:49 am • 1 0 • view
why no showtunes? (honestly asking. I'm not out here trying to be the 31st person of the night singing Defying Gravity)
aug 27, 2025, 11:45 am • 0 0 • view
Hard agree on 6). I remember a beautiful male friend doing an *exquisite* version of Chris Issac 'Wicked Game' one time. Not a dry seat in the room when he hit that long high note. Ooft.
aug 27, 2025, 10:13 am • 0 0 • view
Co-sign. All the people who are capable of singing showtunes should go audition somewhere, not harsh our mellow. I need to get myself hyped for my next cover of Creep.
aug 27, 2025, 3:13 am • 1 0 • view
community theater exists for a reason!!
aug 27, 2025, 3:15 am • 3 0 • view
Speaking as someone who DJs and KJs, naaah - the resort needs to pay someone who runs the queue with an iron hand. Having THE RULES and a benevolent dictator means everyone gets a chance, and one person can’t swamp the queue. I gots OPINIONS about how I run sessions.
aug 27, 2025, 1:47 am • 10 0 • view
There are those who would say there is *no* good karaoke version of Hallelujah (they might be right, they might be wrong, but the Party Resort is not the place or time to find out)
aug 27, 2025, 12:54 am • 11 0 • view
strong agree
aug 27, 2025, 12:56 am • 4 0 • view
Nothing can stop a sad drunk boy from singing, it's impossible
aug 27, 2025, 2:12 am • 0 0 • view
Like, you do “Hallelujah” to say “say, this song’s about fuckin’ and I got SOUL for fuckin’” - but if you’ve done fucking STAIND beforehand with a straight face, you can rest assured that you can’t in fact sell that statement and shouldn’t even bother.
aug 27, 2025, 1:41 am • 10 1 • view
amen
aug 27, 2025, 1:45 am • 2 0 • view