I can’t wait for Trump’s heartwarming Christmas message where he rants for ten minutes about Rosie O’Donnell, takes credit for the invention of the cotton gin, deports Yogi and Boo Boo, and then farts himself gently to sleep.
Replies
I can. Oh how I can wait. I’ll wait so hard that I miss the inevitable post.
may 27, 2025, 6:11 am • 0 0 • view
"Farts himself gently to sleep" being code for: "Shits himself violently, and dies from dysentery."
may 27, 2025, 10:09 am • 0 0 • view
While standing nonetheless
may 27, 2025, 6:08 am • 1 0 • view
Oh boy, I can already feel the holiday cheer! Can we just get to the part where he farts himself to sleep?
may 27, 2025, 6:22 am • 0 0 • view
That's what happens when you steal pic-a-nic baskets.
may 27, 2025, 6:10 am • 1 0 • view
He also co-wrote "Yesterday", and fumes that Paul Beatles has never thanked him.
may 27, 2025, 6:40 am • 2 0 • view
Yogi and Boo Boo, terrible bears! The worst bears. Very unpopular. They stole my picnic lunch once. Right off the table! It was horrible. I wanted to tell the ranger, but somebody fired him. Nobody in the shack. So I'm sending them to El Salvador. It was a beautiful lunch.
may 27, 2025, 7:10 am • 3 0 • view
You know that man has never had a gentle fart in his life. Every one of his orifices only spouts violence and rage.
may 27, 2025, 6:16 am • 2 0 • view
He'll probably also announce a 200% tariff on the North Pole because Santa is a "woke, radical, left-wing communist" for giving away all those toys for free, and for only hiring elves.
may 27, 2025, 7:55 am • 4 0 • view
"He gave away thirty dolls. That's as many as three tens. And that's sad."
may 27, 2025, 8:53 am • 2 0 • view
Likely won’t get one because by then not able to talk or text
may 27, 2025, 6:44 pm • 0 0 • view
You expect him to last til Christmas?
may 27, 2025, 6:12 am • 0 0 • view
He’ll cancel Christmas. Too foreign.
may 27, 2025, 6:30 am • 4 0 • view
“Please welcome my newest Cabinet member, Krampus. Thank you for your attention to this matter”
may 27, 2025, 6:15 am • 1 0 • view
Oh no, not Boo Boo
may 27, 2025, 6:08 am • 0 0 • view
Don't forget Melania's Lovely Liminal Christmas
may 27, 2025, 6:10 am • 2 0 • view
"I'm pardoning Gargamel!"
may 27, 2025, 6:13 am • 1 0 • view
Smurf Village isn't sending it's best and brightest. It's sending it's Grouchys and Vanitys and Jokeys, and, one assumes, it's very fine Smurfettes.
may 27, 2025, 10:36 am • 0 0 • view