this is hilarious to me as a woman on the left because it seems like every conversation is absolutely dominated by this topic, either explicitly or implicitly
Replies
We're constantly talking about how we're never talking about this
aug 2, 2025, 9:54 pm • 2 0 • view
I've now raised two sons to adults. They laugh at these "think pieces" because they don't give a rat's ass about "masculinity" -- because my husband and I don't do gender roles but we do focus on being good and kind. They've always been SWAMPED by girls. At all levels of education and in the world.
aug 1, 2025, 8:31 pm • 18 0 • view
I really tried to give this guy a fair shot and read the article but it kinda just turned into a letter to his younger self. He didn’t want to write about a legitimate problem, he wanted to claim it’s a legitimate problem and then make himself the hero problem solver
aug 1, 2025, 7:54 pm • 14 1 • view
That tracks, because there's a narrative in which the Hero Problem Solver always gets laid. Mario gets Princess Peach, Indiana Jones gets Marian, and so forth... ...as if women can be given as prize rewards... as they were in the Iliad. Achilles got SO angry, when Menelaus took his prize!
aug 1, 2025, 9:38 pm • 7 1 • view
If men are that hard you, they can get together and fuck each other. There. Problem solved. Everyone has agency and consent, as opposed to whatever the fuck this article is.
aug 1, 2025, 10:24 pm • 11 0 • view
It’s difficult to me, because you are absolutely right, but I’ve also seen that post generate more good conversation on the topic than I’ve seen before
aug 1, 2025, 11:17 pm • 1 0 • view
also the sex positive community is largely liberal/progressive and unsurprising, they have a lot of sex. But many lonely men don't connect with the community because they are taught by conservatives and self improvement grifters that talking earnestly about desire and consent will make them gay.
aug 2, 2025, 5:37 pm • 3 0 • view
Classic passive aggressive behavior. Start out passive, become aggressive.
aug 1, 2025, 9:47 pm • 3 0 • view
Yet another right-win claim just as factually accurate as "they're eating the dogs". - I'm a left-wing man. I don't get laid as much as I'd like. The right wing wants me to blame feminism. No, feminism is not the problem. I blame creepy, predatory men, because they force women to take fewer chances.
aug 1, 2025, 8:58 pm • 8 1 • view
Why do these guys think getting laid is The Most (or Only) Important Thing for men? The right is "winning" with young men because they encourage that incredibly narrow view and then play to it; but that's exactly *why* men are flailing and failing in other areas of life.
aug 1, 2025, 6:41 pm • 38 1 • view
Seriously- you can get young men to do a lot more crazy shit with the promise of being surrounded by other young men than the promise of being surrounded by women. Look at the military and fraternities. Communities and friendship are obviously as or more important than sex to men this age.
aug 1, 2025, 6:59 pm • 32 1 • view
When one variable has a high value, that doesn't necessarily prove that other variables have lower values. If there were a mutually exclusive choice, if the cost of joining a fraternity was giving up sex and breaking up with my sweetie, then at age 19, I would not have joined my fraternity....
aug 1, 2025, 9:28 pm • 0 0 • view
...and when men join an all-male military, how many of them chose that _in preference_ to an equivalent option which surrounded them with women? What exactly are those options?
aug 1, 2025, 9:28 pm • 0 0 • view
College and most retail jobs.
aug 1, 2025, 9:32 pm • 1 0 • view
Most men wont admit it: the feeling of belonging is no less important to us as adults than when we were growing up. Having a sense of community is very fullfilling and easy to manipulate if people are feeling alone and lost. The forces of patriarchal capitalism impose isolation as much as possible
aug 1, 2025, 9:19 pm • 13 0 • view
Indeed. Patriarchal capitalism doesn't want us growing vegetables in our back yard, nor creating community without its involvement. Patriarchal capitalism wants to charge fees for Premium Prestige Membership, whether at the local bowling league, or on an airline, or on a dating app.
aug 2, 2025, 7:26 am • 2 0 • view
Exactly. These institutions exploit something that can actually be quite beautiful when used towards positive ends. Young men needing to belong to each other is how we got the Beatles and sports.
aug 1, 2025, 9:22 pm • 4 0 • view
I hate it so much! Ive had some deep and meaningful friendships with groups of both men and women thanks to music and nerdy stuff and it has always been such a lovely and positive thing. I am not religious by any means, but it is like these institutions are spitting on something holy and sacred
aug 1, 2025, 9:26 pm • 5 0 • view
YES. I don’t think you’re wrong about it being holy- there are so many religious traditions based around male kinship and it makes sense as an instinct that would help a group survive. In many ways nerd culture can be very subversive in the way it can encourage healthy male friendships.
aug 1, 2025, 9:30 pm • 3 0 • view
Absolutely! I LOVE how nerd culture can bring people together. There are certainly a lot of toxic men who engage in nerdy stuff, but ive personally seen a few men stop engaging with incel/podcastbro content when they realized that real life doesnt work that way. Only works if they actually go out
aug 1, 2025, 10:13 pm • 4 0 • view
And meet with other people though. I think that ties back to the isolation thing. It is VERY difficult to manipulate people away from a strong community, but conversely very easy to manipulate them into a toxic one if they are lonely
aug 1, 2025, 10:14 pm • 4 0 • view
I am profoundly grateful for all of the nerds who have taken care of my nerd brother over the years.
aug 1, 2025, 10:40 pm • 4 0 • view
Me too 😊
aug 1, 2025, 11:12 pm • 3 0 • view
My God but you people live in a strange society.
aug 1, 2025, 7:28 pm • 0 0 • view
Who is "you people" here
aug 1, 2025, 8:14 pm • 11 0 • view
Anyone who fucks along party lines
aug 1, 2025, 8:15 pm • 0 0 • view
I'm not sure what that has to do with my skeet?
aug 1, 2025, 8:16 pm • 14 0 • view
I’ve seen many versions of this post and as I have been informed by another poster, people in the US are having sex along party lines. Which, if true, is really weird. Or just take it as an offhand observation
aug 1, 2025, 8:41 pm • 0 0 • view
My post has nothing to do with people having sex along party lines.
aug 1, 2025, 8:45 pm • 22 0 • view
But why do you hate waffles?
aug 1, 2025, 10:26 pm • 17 0 • view
No? “this is hilarious to me as a woman on the left because it seems like every conversation is absolutely dominated by this topic, either explicitly or implicitly” My mistake then
aug 1, 2025, 8:50 pm • 0 0 • view
Yeah, exactly. I'm not sure how you get anything about people having sex along party lines from that.
aug 1, 2025, 8:53 pm • 12 0 • view
I’m not American so I understand subtext? I don’t know what to tell you. If right wing men are complaining about sex and the left and if your left wing friends have this conversation then what was it about? Checkers?
aug 1, 2025, 8:56 pm • 0 0 • view
Bongo, when you say "subtext", you apparently mean "my narrative and my interests, regardless of what the author was writing about". That's not particularly sane.
aug 1, 2025, 9:45 pm • 9 0 • view
I mean that every conversation I have outside my close personal or professional circles which touches on cultural issues at all eventually becomes about men getting their dicks wet, either in the text or in the subtext.
aug 1, 2025, 9:01 pm • 9 0 • view
People come right out and broadcast their proclivities for everyone, don't they?
aug 1, 2025, 8:50 pm • 4 0 • view
Which is ok, I guess but this one is weird
aug 1, 2025, 8:51 pm • 0 0 • view
Oh, I'm sorry that you read my rhetorical question as agreeing with you.
aug 1, 2025, 8:56 pm • 5 0 • view
I don’t care either way. Not all posts need to be analyzed or approved. Have a nice day.
aug 1, 2025, 8:57 pm • 0 0 • view
I mean, I don't fuck dipshits, so I guess in that sense I could be said to fuck along party lines, but it's not my fault that one party is comprised entirely of dipshits
aug 1, 2025, 8:57 pm • 14 0 • view
I would have thought crazy weird radical leftist inventions like birth control and abortion rights helped men get laid, but that's just me. Also not treating women like sex objects and maids. Crazy radical ideas, I know. I should probably be sent to a reeducation farm to cure me of them.
aug 1, 2025, 6:18 pm • 215 9 • view
Mmm. I think that misogyny has a left and a right-wing version. Plenty of men on the left who enjoy women’s reproductive freedoms mostly because it means they don't have to exercise any personal responsibility, or demonstrate commitment.
aug 1, 2025, 6:25 pm • 45 0 • view
Lol no. Left wing misogynists are the same, looking down on women leaders and being more credulous towards men. This no responsibility is just patriarchy trying to tie women down.
aug 1, 2025, 11:55 pm • 3 0 • view
It's not even "versions," its just that misogyny is non-partisan
aug 1, 2025, 8:16 pm • 84 1 • view
aug 1, 2025, 9:15 pm • 10 0 • view
They're all taught since kidhood, whatever their politics, that cishet men are very important & their needs must be prioritized. If they have a problem or an unmet want, we must solve it, or they'll be even worse rulers than they are now, which they should totally still be, don't depose them.
aug 1, 2025, 7:52 pm • 4 0 • view
This has been explicitly spoken about since gamergate. Consent has been a punchline joke for more than a decade for comedians. For that matter, how many young men really fall into this confused can't talk to women incel category? www.theguardian.com/news/2024/ja...
aug 3, 2025, 7:54 pm • 1 0 • view
From what I have read, not as large a proportion of population as the MAGA or some Democrats would like everyone to believe. Similar conversations about young men in Europe but the statistics for most countries is between 5-10% of men who like fx. the Tate brothers agree with them about women.
aug 3, 2025, 7:59 pm • 0 0 • view
Srsly.
aug 1, 2025, 9:48 pm • 0 0 • view
I dunno, I think angrily and vocally abandoning the entrenched politically dominant demographic to uncontested indoctrination might not be the path to the glorious egalitarian society they resist.
aug 2, 2025, 3:20 pm • 0 0 • view
What?
aug 2, 2025, 8:30 pm • 3 0 • view
🛎️🛎️🛎️
aug 1, 2025, 9:14 pm • 1 0 • view
yeppppppppppp
aug 1, 2025, 6:30 pm • 0 0 • view
Lmaooo yeppp. As a leftist woman it seems like I never hear anything else but "male loneliness suffering in silence" Look, being lonely sucks and I agree it can be hard, but I think that men need to start looking in house and at THEIR OWN shit and maybe figure out what THEY are doing...
aug 2, 2025, 7:42 pm • 5 0 • view
Maybe listen to the women who are telling you why they want nothing to do with you, don't force women to date you or interact with you. You'll notice that normal, well adjusted men who treat others like humans and equals hardly ever complain about the "male loneliness epidemic"
aug 2, 2025, 7:42 pm • 0 0 • view
it’s the classic “it’s women’s fault Im not getting laid because of my sexist beliefs about women”
aug 1, 2025, 8:42 pm • 91 0 • view
aug 2, 2025, 1:05 am • 9 0 • view
Oh lady of the left, please explain the exact formula to get in your pants
aug 2, 2025, 1:22 am • 1 0 • view
Stop making getting into lady pants the premise of your interaction with women.
aug 2, 2025, 10:02 am • 4 0 • view
I think that's kinda the point of the article, isn't it? But that only the right/manosphere explicitly offer (bullshit, awful) "solutions".
aug 2, 2025, 12:28 am • 0 0 • view
not if he thinks the left is silent on the topic of dudes getting laid
aug 2, 2025, 12:58 am • 13 0 • view
Did you read the article? He's talking about the fact that the vast majority of "advice" on how to get laid that's pitched at horny teen boys comes from the manosphere, and how that can be addressed. That doesn't seem very contentious to me?
aug 2, 2025, 1:04 am • 0 0 • view
I'm responding to the first like of his skeet, in which he says that the left is silent on this topic. I assure you, the left is not remotely silent wrt dudes trying to get laid.
aug 2, 2025, 1:12 am • 16 0 • view
The original skeet is a link to an article he wrote, in which it's very clear that the "silence" he's talking about is solely relating to advice on how to get laid being offered to hormonal teen boys. I genuinely don't know how anyone who has read the article it links could interpret it wider.
aug 2, 2025, 1:29 am • 0 0 • view
The original skeet, the one I quoted, contains no link at all. The article is maybe a collateral part of the conversation here, but only a collateral part. If I wanted to talk about the article, I'd be in the comments to his article. I'm talking about the thread here.
aug 2, 2025, 1:30 am • 10 0 • view
It's a three skeet thread, the first of which links to the article, and the other two fine a brief precis of it. I see where you're coming from re "I was specifically referring to skeet 2" but it seems odd to excise context. (Fwiw I absolutely agree with your main point)
aug 2, 2025, 1:41 am • 0 0 • view
It has over 750 replies and nearly two thousand quotes -- the conversation goes a lot farther than his three skeets.
aug 2, 2025, 1:42 am • 10 0 • view
“They aren’t offering advice on the subject” is not even remotely the same as “they are completely silent on the subject,” even if I were inclined to grant that first premise to begin with.
aug 2, 2025, 1:07 am • 8 0 • view
Why do people have to be so weird about sex in the first place?
aug 2, 2025, 1:13 am • 2 0 • view
Typically because it's easier than a spending minimal amount of effort on trying to get your shit together.
aug 2, 2025, 1:18 am • 4 0 • view
I like a challenge
aug 2, 2025, 1:27 am • 0 0 • view
Yeah. I don't think the problem is lack of advice. The problem is that a lot people don't want to hear: "Be a functional human being, have realistic expectations, and acknowledge that women have agency"
aug 2, 2025, 3:31 am • 1 0 • view
I'm not quite sure what you mean by that, sorry. "They are completely silent on the subject of how to get laid" and "they aren't offering advice on how to get laid" seems broadly equivalent to me. Maybe I'm misunderstanding what you're saying.
aug 2, 2025, 1:15 am • 0 0 • view
not even "how to get laid" but "getting laid." I promise you, there are a LOT of ways to talk about getting laid that have nothing to do with advice.
aug 2, 2025, 1:25 am • 4 0 • view
Being completely silent on a subject means being completely silent on it, not talking about it at all. Not offering advice means not offering advice. Offering advice is only a tiny subset of the ways in which you can talk about something.
aug 2, 2025, 1:18 am • 2 0 • view
Oh come on lol. It's abundantly clear from the article that the "silence" referred to is limited to advice to hormonal teen boys on how to get laid. It's a willful misreading to ignore the context and pretend it's saying something it absolutely isn't.
aug 2, 2025, 1:25 am • 0 0 • view
From the article, maybe. From the posts here on this butterfly site? I'd disagree.
aug 2, 2025, 1:27 am • 3 0 • view
I think it's fair to say that, regardless of the article, the lede sucks at best or is a straight-up lie at worst.
aug 4, 2025, 10:41 am • 0 0 • view
I mean, it's literally a post advertising this week's column on a journalist's substack. It seems a bit weird to pass negative judgment without bothering to check whether the impression you got from a (necessarily) tiny precis was actually what he was saying.
aug 2, 2025, 1:37 am • 0 0 • view
He describes the subject as "a progressive approach to romance and attraction," not about "advice about getting laid." Are you really saying that men using leftist spaces to creep on women is outside the remit?
aug 2, 2025, 1:40 am • 3 0 • view
It seems more than a bit weird to be this committed to disputing whether a throwaway comment on a microblogging platform addresses a topic to your personal satisfaction.
aug 2, 2025, 1:39 am • 0 0 • view
I read the guy’s piece, idk. It seems like he got his heart broken at one time and has had a hard time of it since. I get that. But pretending like men are the only ones that like to get laid is his fatal flaw imo. It comes off as kind of whiny.
aug 1, 2025, 8:53 pm • 6 0 • view
Silly me thinking it is unseemly to bitch and whine how women just won't drop their panties when I tell them I listen to Joe Rogaine. Pookie, and I mean this with way more sarcasm than he can process... You getting laid or not isn't something anyone cares about but your parole officer checking DOB.
aug 1, 2025, 6:25 pm • 17 0 • view
Every time someone opens a conversation with "Why don't we ever talk about X?", X is something we talk about *quite a lot, actually*. Like... Why don't we ever talk about how ambergris is kinda just whale vomit? Maybe we don't *need* to, but it's at least true that it doesn't come up much.
aug 2, 2025, 5:41 pm • 5 0 • view
Michael Hobbes had the most generous interpretation of this post which is that it is bad that young men looking for dating advice are going to be flooded with PUAs and Andrew Tate, which I 100% agree is very bad, but like ... What is the left meant to do here?
aug 1, 2025, 6:29 pm • 95 0 • view
No normie men want to talk to the left cause they constantly demonize and belittle men’s problems It’s a known issue with the modern left Stop acting like those screw ups are doing anything worth while in this discourse when they gave up on young men over a decade ago
aug 3, 2025, 1:59 am • 0 0 • view
How are you defining "normie men" here?
aug 3, 2025, 2:18 am • 9 0 • view
People who don’t spend half their day reading ideological theory …. Hell the left openly mocks the male suicide rate and I’ve seen them hand wave away the fact that men are just giving up and becoming doomers They don’t care or are actively hostile to them for woke points online
aug 3, 2025, 2:20 am • 0 0 • view
I'm on the left, and plenty of men who have never cracked an ideological theory book in their lives talk to me every day.
aug 3, 2025, 2:22 am • 6 0 • view
Cool I’m the king of England and I have never seen a shark in person Therefore sharks don’t exist …. Cause that is how the world works right?
aug 3, 2025, 2:27 am • 0 0 • view
Nope. So are these men who speak to me despite having never read an ideological theory textbook "normie" or nah?
aug 3, 2025, 2:48 am • 6 0 • view
And this concept of no one thinking of the poor men is not new. going-medieval.com/2023/02/23/o...
aug 3, 2025, 11:36 am • 1 0 • view
Not to mention quoting and then disabling replies is a serious pussy move. Sounds like people were giving him good advice and he just didn’t like it.
aug 3, 2025, 3:47 pm • 2 0 • view
And he quote posts this while disabling comments and quotes on his quote post with a complaint that someone said something that nobody in the thread said.
aug 3, 2025, 3:34 pm • 0 0 • view
I think there is a space open here because people are desperate for community and the right doesn't offer that, they're basically self-help grifters who charge for the tough love stuff that's very generic. The left has the advantage of being in cities, where it's easy to get communities going IRL.
aug 1, 2025, 6:55 pm • 5 0 • view
People often have the idea of creating men's social groups on the left, which I think has a lot of space open. Young men are I think genuinely lost and impressionable, and creating an IRL pipeline for onboarding them into a community is a good idea. (And it's ok if it results in relationships)
aug 1, 2025, 6:57 pm • 4 0 • view
Literally nobody is stopping men on the left from doing this!
aug 1, 2025, 6:58 pm • 7 0 • view
yes, it's a good idea
aug 1, 2025, 6:59 pm • 1 0 • view
I hear this a lot, and I think when acted on it often works. I was part of a book club that was really a men's circle. It was great, but fell apart during COVID. Such groups are necessarily small and we need a lot of them. I want to start something if my health allows me to be near people again.
aug 1, 2025, 8:34 pm • 4 0 • view
Yeah Covid made everything worse.
aug 1, 2025, 8:35 pm • 1 0 • view
In Rome, I saw people buying “soft serve” at McDonalds, when they could have instead bought artisanal gelato at a nearby local store. Such a missed opportunity! - Almost as unwise, as men who choose Andrew Tate as role model, when they could instead have chosen Tom Holland.
aug 1, 2025, 9:00 pm • 0 0 • view
I mean it’s hard for “the left” (whatever that means rn) when most leftist men I know have never uttered the phrase much less considered the reality of rape culture or patriarchy. How can they teach if they won’t learn (by and large, there are obvious and wonderful exceptions)?
aug 1, 2025, 9:18 pm • 0 0 • view
And…I really wonder if Ian ran this by any women in his life. When I am writing about something that is sensitive, I make a point to hit check with trusted folks. Maybe he did…but if a cishet male friend gave me this I would’ve offered some loving, but productive criticism before publication.
aug 1, 2025, 9:20 pm • 4 0 • view
It wouldn't have taken much research to come up with Dr Nerdlove or the guys on Facebook and Tiktok who explicitly call out bullshit behaviour.
aug 2, 2025, 2:36 am • 4 0 • view
It's not simply a "generous interpretation," that's literally the stated assertion of the piece.
aug 3, 2025, 4:04 pm • 0 0 • view
To me the best path will always be family and friends. It’s our job to not let young men fall down the PUA/Tate/Incel rabbit hole. But it can’t be reactive. That’s too late. It means having hard conversations with them at the dinner table. In the car.
aug 3, 2025, 12:13 pm • 1 0 • view
It means telling them why their friends are wrong and why those YouTube channels are blocked. It means telling them to ask questions of the women in their life and really listen. And doing that by example by staring with yourself.
aug 3, 2025, 12:13 pm • 1 0 • view
Then do the work to start a liberal social club. But it must be as aggressive in recruitment as the incels. It can’t be passive. It must invade every single space young men hang out in and repeatedly bash out pro-liberal and anti-bigoted points.
aug 3, 2025, 12:13 pm • 1 0 • view
There are a absolutely lovely left and apolitical dating advice experts including men, doing their best with solid advice but the thing is they are giving the real tough love which way too many boys and men don't want to hear.
aug 1, 2025, 6:31 pm • 87 3 • view
YES YES YES YES YES YES I swear to God -- it makes me crazy when I hear the responses to good advice and it's all "I hear you but you should say it nicer" or "ok but promise me everyone will love me/have sex with me"
aug 1, 2025, 10:06 pm • 4 0 • view
They think they still don’t have to hear it because they still think this is their market. It’s not anymore.
aug 1, 2025, 6:56 pm • 3 0 • view
I've been looking for a concise way to say "it's not their market anymore"! Thank you. The closest I got was "well, violence and coercion are off the table, trickery and lying and shaming into sex are also off the table, so maybe try real conversation". Yours is better.
aug 1, 2025, 10:19 pm • 3 0 • view
Not "you are hopeless because women be shallow" but "put on a clean shirt, don't be a creep, and actively listen and you'll probably be surprised how your opportunities open up" And like ... Beyond that what is the left meant to do? Make Dr. Nerdlove mandatory high school coursework?
aug 1, 2025, 6:32 pm • 101 1 • view
It's like the "we need a leftist Joe Rogan" bullshit. We have leftist men on twitch and youtube and even podcasts. But these types of men don't want to listen to them. They want validation for all of their anger
aug 3, 2025, 8:56 am • 2 0 • view
Also, I have some friends who do all these things but are stuck in self-sabotaging patterns of seeking only unavailable women or women who are a bad fit for them for many reasons, so it’s probably a good idea to go to therapy as well. Some of them also suffer from “good guy syndrome”
aug 1, 2025, 7:13 pm • 53 1 • view
They think they do all of the above so they deserve to be rewarded w a woman, which is still misogynistic, but they don’t realize it bc they’re doing more than nothing, & the bar is so low for men that they are confused about why more than nothing isn’t automatically enough.
aug 1, 2025, 7:14 pm • 61 1 • view
Men need to be comprehensively educated about how women are people and any suggestion that they are less than men is severelt offensive, starting in very young childhood. Honestly, i think it is the only way to pretty much guarantee they will naturally reject the likes of Tate, Peterson, etc
aug 1, 2025, 9:16 pm • 33 0 • view
Exactly this. Falling for Tate et al *requires* a vulnerability to the falsehood that women aren't fully equal human beings. The younger kids aren't getting the message that all humans are human no matter what they look like on the outside. That allows them to accept this harmful premise.
aug 2, 2025, 9:57 am • 10 0 • view
I went through a phase of consistently and exclusively falling for gay men. That kind of thing comes under You Problems.
aug 1, 2025, 8:28 pm • 6 0 • view
I actually like that idea. Add in Captain Awkward for a diversity of viewpoints, I hear conservatives like that.
aug 1, 2025, 8:23 pm • 5 0 • view
Yes!
aug 1, 2025, 8:18 pm • 2 0 • view
Apparently I just need to start a new podcast and talk about how left dudes can get laid but like... I don't wanna.
aug 3, 2025, 5:52 pm • 3 0 • view
bsky.app/profile/ragl...
aug 2, 2025, 4:22 pm • 0 0 • view
As I told him, he's doing the same stupid thing that the right wing does to men: pandering to this idea that anyone, and especially men are ENTITLED to sex, and propping up the idea that if men aren't getting sex, SOMETHING IS WRONG. The right wing will pander to this the same way they do...
aug 1, 2025, 7:18 pm • 40 0 • view
I am entitled to sex! I'm just not entitled to anyone else's participation. - The core question is whether women are people. If women's bodies were a public utility, THEN I could complain about not getting my fair share; but women are people.
aug 1, 2025, 9:05 pm • 2 1 • view
It's exactly this. There's a persistent and largely unexamined belief in our culture that powerful men are entitled to do whatever they want with women's bodies and attention, in direct correlation to their own power and inverse correlation to the power of other men present.
aug 1, 2025, 9:21 pm • 5 0 • view
As a result, men frequently abuse or exploit women either because they believe they are entitled to do so by their own power, as an aspirational method of establishing their own power, or as a coup-counting method of establishing where they are in the power hierarchy among the other men present.
aug 1, 2025, 9:23 pm • 7 0 • view
Indeed. There's a connection, along this axis, between (A) the wrath of Achilles, in the Iliad ,when Menelaus confiscated Briseis, whom Achilles counted as a prize, assigned according to his rank among warriors (B) DJT's claim about what famous men can get away with.
aug 1, 2025, 9:57 pm • 3 0 • view
thiiiiiis this this this so much this
aug 1, 2025, 9:57 pm • 2 0 • view
IOW, when Trump said "They let you do it," the "they" in that sentence is not referring to women
aug 1, 2025, 9:58 pm • 7 0 • view
I marked "like" as in "agree", though the insight is horrible. - I see multiple levels in "they". At a high level of abstraction, yes, Judge Aaron Persky let Brock Turner sexually Chanel Miller (in the "Stanford swimmer" case), by giving Turner such a light sentence afterwards...
aug 1, 2025, 10:13 pm • 2 0 • view
...effectively over-ruling the two guys on bicycles who, then and there, saw what Turner was doing to Miller, and stopped him. (The two guys were Peter Jonsson and Carl-Fredrik Arndt; they were grad students from Sweden; current POTUS would probably deport them.)
aug 1, 2025, 10:13 pm • 2 0 • view
"Coup counting" is a phrase I have not heard in a very long time. Very nicely applied.
aug 1, 2025, 9:25 pm • 2 0 • view
that's what catcalling is about, I think
aug 1, 2025, 9:56 pm • 2 0 • view
Parallel to counting coup as in "I did this successfully, and therefore I could have chosen to do worse"? - If I catcall an ordinary woman, then she might not choose to risk outcomes of confronting me. But if I ever catcalled Melania Trump, then her security detail would forcefully discourage me.
aug 1, 2025, 10:25 pm • 1 0 • view
You had the courage to lay claim to her attention when the others did not; therefore, you take this prize.
aug 1, 2025, 10:43 pm • 2 0 • view
But ultimately, the guy who want to have that "conversation" that is under discussion don't actually believe that women are people...or, at the least, that women aren't being "fair" to men like him in denying them sex on demand. He's another ChatGPT essay away from mewling for Pity Sex.
aug 1, 2025, 9:10 pm • 2 0 • view
...to white grievance airing, telling the disaffected white person that they are entitled to that job or that promotion over the black person and are being denied something that's theirs. This is why the right wing seems to attract these little Incel LibertAryan types.
aug 1, 2025, 7:18 pm • 19 0 • view