When you put those together: someone else's not engaging in the gender practice shows that the practice is not natural. But then *my* gender practice isn't natural. But it's *part of the practice* that it be natural, and engaging in the practice is also how a lot of people identify themselves.
So if the practice isn't natural, then who am *I*, who *defines* myself as engaging in this natural practice? Nobody! Your cross-dressing (or whatever) is my death. ...and that's why other people not doing gender your way "harms" you. ...I think.
I think it’s more that conservative are freaked out about not being able to control their kids gender expression.