Flamin' Hot Peetos

so many options here: is it a sunburn because sunscreen is woke and gives you cancer? is it heat stroke because drinking water is global warming alarmism? is it benzo withdrawal again? is it high blood pressure? is he having a rage stroke?

yes

Por qué no los dos? Also, it looks like his hands are normal-ish human color

Probably.

he's combusting through the weight of his own contradictions

Is it the tell for lying?

no, that's just him opening his mouth

Piers: vibing, sipping tea out of a Simpson's mug, in his element, serene JP: YOU WOKE MORALISTS DONT UNDERSTAND HOW YOUNG MEN ARE JACKING OFF TO PORNO ALL DAY LONG JUST JACKING IT WITH NO CREAM AT ALL STRAIGHT JACKING IT INSTEAD OF MARRYING A WOMAN THEY DON'T LIKE TO HAVE KIDS THEY DON'T WANT

He who eats the M E A T, becomes the M E A T

That is his spleen burst.

People will do anything to look like their Fruity Führer

If we’re lucky he’ll od soon

Red Sulk

It's over Mr Peterson, I already drew you as a crying soyjack and me as a Chad.

TIL these characters have names.

I don't know how much they do but the style of weird traced image is called a "Wojak" for some reason, the ones with scraggly beards used for nerd jokes are "Soyjaks", which I think is to do with a conspiracy theory stemming from gym culture about Soy making you weak effeminate

(which I guess the creators of those memes see as consumerist nerdy men for some reason) Chad is an incel term for the sort of annoying jock stereotype, though within these sorts of memes it has sort of evolved into a symbol for ones on conception of the ideal male figure of sorts.

Oh, then you might not know that both of those characters are soyjaks. Chad is the handsome bearded one that's commonly opposing soyjak

I’m going to pretend I never learned this. *erase*

Those are basic wojaks. Soyjaks have stubble and glasses to resemble a generation of youtubers and poscasters.

oh, gotcha, thx

I want to note that the first iteration of "chad" as an archetype is largely from this specific image. The wojak chad with the beard and the disproportionate hypermasculine gigachads are inspired by this guy.

A happy minor detail is that this Ur-Chad's head is shaped like the borders of the African country Chad.

correction: both are wojaks, and the contemptible one is a soyjak

Wojak is the species, Chads and Soyjacks are different subspecies with their own breeds

Can they cross-breed or are they too different?

Hypothetically yes but years of war made it culturally impossible. Best we get is Romeo and Juliet style situations where they die before things go too far.

If only their tribes could bury the hatchet and get past their vendetta.

They're but puppets and mirrors for a higher power, unfathomable to themselves. That being us and our world. If we want them to heal, we must heal ourselves so we have no need to create divided clans even as societal reflections. Like the Lego movie

Was not expecting meme lore at 10 in the morning

He and Alex Jones both have that quality of being unhinged enough to make Piers Morgan seem sane.

which cartoon for little babies is he crying about

fuck you for making me side with Piers Morgan here

Lmao fucking benzos man

As someone who sounds like Kermit with a headcold. JP is the worst thing to happen to me as I've been compared to him instead of Kermit. I used to hate the comparison to Kermit. But you don't know what you lost until it's gone.

Not easy not being green.

Piers is doing Kermit here

he got a tanning bed for the tax savings

I've seen JP cry in public more than any other human being in my life

did piers bring up elmo or something?

Brought him in for an interview, by the look of it. Except Elmo has more emotional control.

I think the question is a reference to the fact that Jordan Peterson famously loathes Elmo and goes on bonkers rants about him when given the opportunity

That is clearly Elmo to the right. He was just asked about Rocky

More basic weird ass Jordan Peterson crap. Who wants to give me a platform? I'll cry all you sonufabitches want.

JP took being red pilled so seriously he has changed colour like a flamingo with shrimp.

The dumbest “smart” person alive.

He is a smart person, the problem is that his psychological problems completely warped his thinking

Many such cases

He feels strongly about the rats.

color correction way off

He was sunning his butt hole but fell asleep

But its his face that's re..... Oooooooo, i get it

Same energy

In his Clifford era.

Someone find him an epi-pen.

Let's not and say we did.

You know what? I stand corrected.

Peterson is the color of an actual Simpsons character.

Pinchy?

More tasty to be fair.

me after spending time outdoors

he looks like Alex Jones after taking his supplements

No way is his face actually that red it's like his face is about to explode

That debate he had with those atheist really cooked him.

Sad attempt by JP to lobsterate himself

jordan peterson looks like he's holding off a scanners attack at all times, but sometimes it looks like he's losing

support those brave scanners

That description of him was so startlingly accurate I had to stop what I was doing for a second to process it for a second

Jordan Peterson turns a completely clear idea into a confusing shit so he can sink into it and pretend inside that he knows something that others don't. By pushing this on children in "debates", he reaches the line where "Canadian psychologist and author" ends and "intellectual pedophile" begins.

that’s what happens when you abuse Rogan supplements and Russian research benzos I guess

here it looks like Piers is a scanner.

Me when I need to take about the dancing, demonic rats.

I joke about the dude and lobsters, but this is too easy

Yeah, I'm passing on this too because obvious joke is obvious.

mug homer simpson

Is peterson the testosterone lobster he told us about?

youtu.be/V2EGmmoCxro?...

Why did that feel like a confession?

Was this just before he spontaneously combusted 😳🤞🏼

Vermillion is the opposite of woke

The human struggles to try and fail to regain control from the alien parasite that is slowly growing to fill the human shell it has set up in.

Honey new meme just dropped

self-help man needs help.

It almost doesn’t even matter anymore what is AI generated or not.

This has to be edited, right? I refuse to believe a human being can turn that colour without dyes and not need a paramedic!

A very strong sub burn will give you that colour. We are talking about a serious sun burn

Saving this for when I need healing

This screenshot taken just seconds after Peterson opened the Ark of the Covenant.

i legit want that homer mug

It's this a new Hot Ones episode ?

What did he swipe from the Wonka factory tour

(Sobs) “The snozzberries used to taste of snozzberries.”

Why is he that color

Jordan Peterson has moved from benzos to some other addiction that may well kill him.

What happened?

Did i miss the best part?

The Qs #piersMorgan asked #jordanPeterson was " How are you?? "

real.

I like that Piers seems to have realized that he’s likable if he has on unhinged idiots and just kind does nothing.

I too support Piers Morgan shutting up.

He needs to balance that color out by taking some colloidal silver. And by some I mean a lot.

Then he’ll be purple!

You say that like it's a bad thing. ;-)

He got burned by the Dragon of Chaos

my make a wish wish is to fight him in public barehanded

But he's an ultra-alpha male! He is the paragon of traditional masculinity. This is suicide! Don't do it! (if you do get the chance though, let me know when and where so I can watch)

i would risk humiliation for the opportunity

If there was a pay-per-view of Jordan Peterson trying to fight his way out of a wet paper bag, I would rent it, and place a significant amount of money on the bag.

time to clean your room kermit

Did Peterson die?

And yet, utterly unsurprising.

No seriously how can someone be that red and not die somehow

He's gonna have an aneurysm unless he starts shooting steam out of his ears

Oh, we just need to wait it out.

Look, if it didn't work for orange I'm not holding my breath

It has to be the lighting right?? But then I look at his hand am like uhh dunno

I have managed that shade one and survived it. But it hurt like a bastard.

Through the power of only eating red meat, he has truly become red meat

Oh he’s pissed.

Animorphs, but its Jordan Peterson turning into a lobster.

Is this extreme sunburn or a heart attack?

Were the only available makeup artists people he despises and wouldn't let them touch him, or did the available makeup artists refuse/sabotage?

Let the poor man die from his 30 lb fecal impaction in peace

Also this needs to be his pic on Wikipedia asap

Yep when I see a red face, I think someone is full of sh!t.

I shared this screencap with so many people tonight, and it spread nothing but delight.

who knew the koolaid man was far right?

is this Bad Omens?

Pagliaci's in trouble y'all

When people say "Red Scare" I didn't think they meant "so scared that they turn red".

📌

yknow I never liked Piers Morgan either but I have to admit this shit is funny af

He... looks like he's about to disintegrate. 🦀

‘Schizoid’ works.

Damn, he's about to go Red Hulk on us all

Guaranteed to break your brain. On purpose. (the devil is in the details) bsky.app/profile/tall...

wait …. what

Everybody staring at Jordan Peterson's red-faced crying crash-out or the psychotic, Eye of Sauron neck tie; but I'm just here admiring his knock-off Dr. Evil pinky ring.

Did he go to a Russian Rehab again? Or a scientology one?

what i look like after spending literally any amount of time in the sun

that's a cool mug, also WHY IS THAT MAN SO VERY RED HE'S LIKE A BRITISH TOURIST

Yep, we all saw it.

I can't believe I had to scroll down this far

Holy shit

Holy shit, that guy's turning into the red hulk.

The devil is just mocking us now.

Pinky ring is always the sign of bad guy

there's gotta b some kinda legal action we could take against people calling jp a "clinical psychologist" the man is a wooey business consultant

0.9 seconds before Hokuto Shinken death.

I guess he forgot to make his bed.

Ok I had to look this up because I was pretty sure you were fucking with us and OMG

I AM A SURGEON

IT'S TIME TO OIL UP www.youtube.com/watch?v=7emo...

Peterson looks like a bag of fries sitting under the heating lamp for an hour.

Guys was roleplaying a Berserker heroic class in some dnd session

Is he back on the raw meat diet?

Or the benzos?

There's just no way to take Jordan seriously when he sounds so much like Shorsey. I keep waiting for him to say "give your balls a tug."

He dies a version of this constantly.

i feel like a small victorian child

quick! someone needs to draw the wojack!!

Saved for future use.

Nice argument, however I have already depicted myself as the smug, unshaken Piers Morgan and you as the seething red Jordan Peterson

Wait that's Jordan Peterson?! I knew he traded his "people are wolves" the rhetoric with "people are lobsters" but I didn't know he was trying to prove it by becoming one!

Oh shit, the lobster let's out his last gasps as he boils live on air

Sponsored by:

Consider the Peterson.

Lol

What do you mean by "red"

aaahahahaha

Tis the voice of J Peterson I heard him explain "you have boiled me too red and exploded my brain"

I wouldn't want to depict myself as either of these men

I like pretending I'm the image border. I'm containing it... If I want... Maybe I can squish it....

what video is this from?

he looks like a baby w jaundice

Babies cry less

Immediately thought of this

j peterson when he sees a woman being paid as much as a man

Peterson would capitalize "man"

and he would have said “a female”

so would a german

When jp sees a homeless person get money

Unresolved mommy issues? Jr high unrequited love?Just guessing...

Is he fucking crying?

he is, but his tears are being instantly evaporated, for obvious reasons

Guy walks around all day looking like he just got maced.

Is that Jordan Peterson? Cartoon villain. They claim to have ALL the answers but they look like death warmed over.

He's finally embracing it.

Stealing this

The Red Scold

Those AI generated images look sloppier every day.

Is Morgan using his mug to hide a grin?

🔥I'LL SHOW YOU THE LIFE OF THE MIND!!!🔥

Rat man changes colors in an attempt to show dominance

No, no, lobster man

They really should have let him die in Russia

insanity

Whats wrong with him

A very long list of things not withstanding his color.

That looks like a severe sunburn Jordy you're supposed to put sunscreen on, sunburns that bad can kill you.

If i were Piers Morgan I would just interview this guy every day

He flew too close to the sun

He looks great. For a... ROCK LOBSTER OOOOH AHHH ROCK LOBSTER OOOOH AHHH

He’s 2/5 of the way to animorphing into a hotdog.

I think his tie might have the T-Virus

Fully cooked, just like Jor Jord here

I need someone (not AI) to do this

Live from the gates of hell type tan

Jordan Petersen is the world's most capable academic because only he could manage to make Piss Morgan look good by comparison

Too many redpills

Does anyone buy the crying Peterson shtick anymore? He step his game up and wear eyeliner like Tammy Faye Bakker.

I buy that he's so emotionally unstable the slightest psychological perturbation will send him spiraling.

I thought Red Lobster went under.

They're still open, at least in my region

Private equity stripped them for parts, restructured after pocketing value.

according to evolutionary psychology, jordan peterson is red because deep down he wants to be harassed by his boss.

You mock but this is true. I goon for hours by eating scotch bonnet peppers and letting my lips and cheeks remain red

lmfao where can I watch this footage? Is he crying about the young men being jizz milked in communist loneliness camps or some shit?

He looks like if Hellboy went to grad school

THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU

if I were JP I would simply be less red. just how I would do it

Gosh I hope this is a sign of Peterson being super sick and will die soon 🤞🏽

Is he crying because he burned fuck out of his face or because trans people exist ?

DESPERATELY need the video clip

If I was in that condition - is he crying- I’d cancel that appearance

Who wore it better?

Why is bro crying

My gosh that man is a tomato

Tomatoes taste better.

Probably has more brains too

Why do you know what Peterson tastes like

Extrapolating from existing information.

nice try, toenail clipping enthusiast

^just loving this sublime repartee

Amazing response 💯

Very hot & wet worms

I love that Grima Wormtongue was also Chucky.

I’m going to guess beef jerky and apple cider vinegar.

Canada, come get your boy. He done

You break it, you bought it.

Do we have to? I’m okay with him being nice and far away.

Y'all have so many islands tho

I would genuinely think this is something you'd have made up.

discourse.jpg

hey he needs to chill on the vape wow wowww

This fucking guy.

Pretty good couples Halloween option

He's taking the whole "be a lobster" thing a bit too far.

"If a dominant lobster is badly defeated, its brain basically dissolves." — Jordan Peterson

Is that weirdo Peterson with a misogynist ?

*another* misogynist

Before reading the alt text I assumed this was AI

it's radiation burns. some scammer sold him a "nail from the Crucifixion" that was just a hunk of cobalt 60

critical support for the scammer, as well as radiation

cool band name tho

Fuck Co-60, all my radcon techs hate Cobalt 60

"Now you see, Piers, the jalapeño is actually the spiciest pepper known to mankind, as you can clearly tell by the effect it is currently having on me"

you and i both know it'd be a bell pepper he'd be talking about :p

“In your face, space coyote!”

youtu.be/buD2RM0xChM?...

That man is Hegseth drunk.

Men will go on Piers Morgan instead of doing therapy.

...good lord. That's not a photoshop?

Persimmon is his color

Wait this is real?

no

Did he get pepper sprayed?

I thought Peterson couldn't embarass himself more than he already has and I am proven wrong once again

"By all medical logic, steam should be shooting out of his ears"

"His ears if we're lucky!"

very I HAD A BIG BOWL OF CHILI energy from jorp lol

And, I assume this is after the makeup people tried to fix him up for air too. 😳

See how Peterson is asserting his alpha dominance? Beta men need to take lessons from this.

Lots of people are talking about this.

He's auditioning for Vinny's seat on the PBD podcast

I'm sure there's a white balance joke in there somewhere

Lookin like he ate some willy Wonka candy

I hate how Chaotic Evil types like Peterson are very useful for more Lawful Evil guys like Piers Morgan. He seems rational in comparison.

I love it when character creation let's me go into the real crazy skin colors.

Morgan: I’m pretty sure you’re red in the face right now. JP: don’t be so sure. 🤨 The utter intensity with which he says that over something as trivial as a pen will never not be funny to me. 😂

When Jordan Peterson met Richard Dawkins, hilarity ensued. www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wBt...

Oh dear. It’s like watching a patient father methodically deduce whether his erratic brother in law shat the bed in which he slept that was found with an irrefutable shit in it. Does he always shout like this?

Dollar store Paul Tillich with a heaping helping of obfuscation and contradictoriness.

Me after drinking the red potion that makes you red

This is the sinister potion Markiplier was selling

Is he crying?

Always.

I hope so.

Is sunscreen woke?

The alt-text is sublime

Sometimes they don’t use good cut🤷‍♀️

i want the listerine jordan uses

Literal 😡 emoji

Please tell me this is a preview of a YTP

I am become lobster

That is the most fully dressed Mad, Red, and Nude that I've ever seen.

Did he eat another apricot

Why is this man always crying lmao ;-;

liver problems?

Nah, i got liver disease. I never am like this 😂😂😂

Liver problems make you cry?!

certain liver problems can make the eyes watery and sensitive

We should not shame men for crying. We should shame him for defending a toxic ideal of masculinity that is untenable and that he himself fails to embody in spectacular fashion.

I appreciate the sentiment truly, but I’d be hard pressed not to make fun of a 7 year old who cried *this* much

I agree with this on its head. The thing with Japers that is particularly odd for me is how quickly he can burst into tears over the most seemingly innocuous shit, while being stone faced in situations where people are going through immeasurable harm. That inconsistency is worthy of note, imo

Crying is good and healthy for anyone, but being constantly on the verge of tears at all hours of the day is an indicator that some kind of mental health intervention may be necessary. It's an important distinction, I feel

Indeed. I gather that his man has painted himself into a deranged ideological corner, where his apparently high sensitivity gets triggered by the imagined demons that he purports to fight off in his delusional crusade.

Yeah, it's that whole "hurt people hurt people" thing. This is clearly someone who is going through some kind of turmoil, and he has sadly chosen to try his best to inflict that pain onto those he deems worthy of suffering, as opposed to fighting to make sure no one else has to suffer as he does

Was he always like this? I could have sworn that he was a bit less like this before his choma

He's definitely gotten a lot more emotionally unstable in recent years, I'm sure the coma didn't help :/ He also follows an all-meat diet so malnutrition is probably a factor too

Genuinely he has fried his brain with drugs and cannot control his emotions

He was like this before. He considers conservatism to be his religion and progressivism to be a threst to his osiritual sanctity. Telling him about literally anything liberal is like pissing on a statue of the virgin mary to him.

Continually sitting on his own balls

Piers doesn’t know his head about to get crushed

Can't wait for the poop. Will pp jordenson finally have sex with the little rat? Only time can tell, but he can't tell time

this is the most accurate representation for 'seething' i have ever seen