[staggers back in holding a gaping head wound] Sexually Responsible Investing

GOOD. BYEEEEEEE

FICC Daddies was taken (I didn’t look but I bet it is)

Oh my god DT(F)CC

I'm not sure how you're going to work in EBITA, but I'm excited for it.

he has to earn it before you start considering long term success

You're going to make so much money.

There’s also a similar level of “you’re assuming he know how to properly manage debt, taxes, and certain laws” common between companies & potential boyfriends I can think of several otherwise blue chip companies with potentially severe future write offs because they couldn’t resist aggressive acctn

What about guys with phenomenal ARR but who are still EBITDA negative because they're quote working on themselves unquote

sell

"You need to diversify your bonds" can go a whole lot of ways...

actually, that exact phrase being used in my voice note to someone tonight is what sparked this idea

“Let’s dollar coast average our way through Hinge, sis!”

This is an amazing idea.

The mall does have that financial advice kiosk that no one is using. I'm just saying.

feels like a bear market, but, like, not in a cool way

You need a solid ROI

is he compounding interest or just costing overhead

making a margin call after seeing a few too many suspicious likes on his IG

You will hate yourself in the end But you will have so much money that you can pay for an excellent therapist to make you feel better about yourself So I say do it.

as if I’m not already / have been in therapy for hating myself from religious trauma lmao

If he is accruing that revenue, then he is a keeper.

Does investing in this relationship clear your hurdle rate of being single?

I prefer asset allocation to single-account investing

A well-diversified portfolio of significant others means that if one relationship tanks, you can offset that loss with gains elsewhere.

Determining the value of that futures contract. When should you hold, and when should you sell that relationship?

I would listen to this podcast.

key to know your risk tolerance before making a new investment,

Past performance is not indicative of future results.

He’s always in designer, drives a leased Benz, but Venmo requests you $6 for coffee? Overleveraged. Lifestyle financed entirely on vibes. Expect an emotional margin call.

Already debating between calling myself a T-Bill or a municipal bond

Return on Assets

Getting people out of long term situationships by explaining the cost of capital!