I think also non religious folk--I mean this is an endemic issue, none of us can just snap fingers and solve it--are generally hurting for a lack of a (non online) third space. I'd love cafe society but everyone on their phones at Starbucks (closed at 7) is not gonna be the vibe.
I wonder how long an "open late" cafe with all electronics but e-books banned would survive? Would people actually TALK with strangers? Used to have a coffee place w artists and cops that was remarkably social and welcoming. People DID talk to one another. Not sure why that worked so well but it did
I think yes, but it'd be a bit sui generis, not a chain, in a city and it'd have to have committed and good-at-the-books owners. It's a good idea. In SF there is or was a nice fantasy/SF bookstore that had a cafe next store, with frequent author presentations and groups in the back, that was nice
also I should say there's the LGBT center that has a cafe and also rooms; and city community/rec centers, there's at least one group I've attended meetings at my local. but not everywhere has those. They should!
and then there are bars and pubs, of course. I'm not much of a drinker, but I'm happy enough to go, and Working Families for instance does a monthly think at an outdoor pub; thing is, they can get noisy when it's not like theirs where they actually reserve a whole big space.
There are libraries. There are parks. Struggling. And libraries aren't always comfy esp in a back room where you don't have to shush, and parks, there's weather. and omg I went to a WeWork one time for a meetup. I HATED IT SO MUCH FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FAAACE Kombucha on tap. Nuff said.
then I read the Cult of We after those imploded and it was so very...now. these people are all fucking insane. The techbrozillionaires--well, WeWork was never tech, but he SOLD it as tech somehow, which is why he was able to scale up tremendously before it all crashed. high on their own farts
Miss Aja, if you follow her - she's amazing - did a letter writing campaign in a library. I went several times and had a blast. Yeah, the chairs were uncomfortable, but I had a grand time, good talk, and she provided SUPER food. That was great fun!
don't know her!
Oh check her OUT! She is freaking brilliant, also very funny. She is lovely to know in real life, too. She has some of the BEST commentary! She's a strong Black woman who wades social issue and policy waters with enormous skill. I always learn from her. She will link you to others equally fine!
does she have an account here?
oh, is she based in SoCal?
We're in Sacramento. And yes, she has an account. Just look her up as Miss Aja. You won't be sorry. She's GREAT.
Not political as such, of course, but nice. Unfortunately they ended up closing the cafe because it wasn't making enough money. You start to realize how challenging it is when you're in book clubs. Now since Covid a lot more are on Zoom, which is nice bc easier to attend, but...nicer in person.
That's a really good point. People hang onto congregations as community. We've tried "church without walls" that SORT of works, but having secular safe space w conversation and interaction is hard to find. Someone either wants you to draft an 'action plan' or has music that makes you gag. 🙄
it's also a question of--is rentier the right term here? well, again: physical places to just hang out, that you WANT to just hang out and aren't prohibitively expensive. the destruction of public spaces is very much a right wing project for a reason. in cities I just wish cafes stayed open
i guess we could plot the Revolution (TM) at a Denny's
Hell - the servers would become the vanguard!
I still think it'd go better over Viennese pastries and Art Nouveau, oh well
Well...what wouldn't??? But Denny's servers have seen it all and are ready to revolt if ANYONE is!
I gather Waffle Houses would be even more ripe for it--I heard of the Waffle House sign that the hurricane's REALLY serious when they finally send the servers home--but I've never been to one, not being in the right region
My one visit was odd. Driving back roads in SE TN and NW GA during a HUGE smoke event from Mexico. Gag worthy. We stopped for AC and food at a Waffle House only to find something had cremated on the grill. Worse inside than out. Food was good though. That was my only trip. I'm OK w that.
yikes. per the Cracker Barrel blow up 🙄 I've been once too, well twice same day bc nothing else in town. And yeah, the food wasn't bad! but the front room looked like Holly Hobby barfed Precious Moments all over it. I'd get the bends if that were my regular hangout.
Used to eat at one weekly because I taught about 40 miles from home, and that was the only decent lunch place between home and campus. I spent a LOT of time looking at that "Precious Moments" stuff they sold and discovered tons of things I did not need. So that was that. Food's OK!
Cracker Barrel is bizarre(/bazaar)
It's true. I live near many and on the Atlantic where there are hurricanes. I've seen them closed only a few times.
true true
...stayed open later. course we're all phone addicted on top of it.
Went to Applebees (sue me; I like them) w older people there all laughing and talking. Four young people came in, sat down, never said a word, all on phones. Server took the order, gave it out, they ate, never said a word or put down the phones. Left. So...why BOTHER? 🙄
Sometimes I sort of get it; as a Terminally Online person who's neurospicy & has friends of the same ilk, I've been in rooms where we're all on the same chat on our various devices *to each other.* Or sometimes just doing "parallel play," you know. But yeah generally. Face to face can be...nice.
also of course most of my friends there's no choice because literally scattered over the world. we need a TARDIS
I guess. I admit because our house while small is oddly laid out, and hubs and I can't hear each other room to room. So recently I've started CALLING him rather than walking 20 feet. The lure of phones is real.
speaking of. I should really start to tear myself away and head to bed. It's been good talking to you! I followed you, hope that's ok.
Oh wow - I thought I WAS following you. Now I do! That's super. Thanks for the GREAT talk. And not even on phones! Good night! I'll head to bed soon, too. Sweet dreams!
heh.