You could have fun coming up with slogans that _genuinely_ capture universities' brands, mind. Oxford: "Where your next six Prime Ministers come from." Cambridge: "Newton, punk." Imperial: "All the money. Because London." St Andrews: "I really hope you like golf."
Surely St Andrews is "No, you won't meet a prince who's slumming it with the plebs for a couple of years before going back to princing. But you might!"
"We're a whole sub-genre of romance!"
And in the meantime you'll spend four years tripping over Americans
University of Aberdeen: “the *proper* Uni in this city.”
When I was young “Wolverhampton Polytechnic… were at the back of the book for a reason” (GYAC, a went to the Wally Poly so I’m allowed to say it)
Damn typo!!!! “We’re at the back of the book” Typical wolves poly student not checking properly.
Another Wally Poly! What is now Bournemouth University is located in the part of town called Wallisdown. And used to be a polytechnic. It was an obvious step from there.
The battle of the Wally Polys !
What's your Wally Poly good at? Ours is video game design and midwifery if I remember correctly.
When I was there (end of the 80s) it was environmental science and law as I recall. Video game design is the coolest, but midwifery and environmental science probably the most worthy.
There's great crossover potential here: design a game about an environmental lawyer and her experiences in childbirth. Or something.
Production company called “WWP Games” (Woke Wally Poly)
Where do I sign?
Sign? We’re running the company!
Got it! Where's my executive office?
Leeds: The North for people who never venture beyond the M25
Friend of mine at St Andrews was the first in his family to go to uni. Family lived on the Medway, always had done. His gran’s comment on his choice of uni? “Ooh, that’s a long way North of York.”
It may come as a shock to realise that there is still 'North' beyond Glasgow ...
Plymouth: "Cider near the beach." With regards branding I started at Plymouth Poly, which became the awful potato print Polytechnic South West before graduating from University of Plymouth. Via the HES in Amsterdam. One degree four institutions.
The Open University - You can say you studied in the place you're living in
-I studied in Edinburgh -You studied at Edinburgh -I studied in Edinburgh -Did you ever go into an Edinburgh university? -Yes... -When it wasn't a Saturday? -yes -And you weren't going into the library?
From my dealings with UoE in particular, this sounds like by far the best kind of engagement to have with it. (Nothing against most of the academics, but as an institution it really makes you feel that it's just scraped you off its shoes.)
The library was great, as long as I didn't take a table in a popular area. I could spend all my free time in there away from my terrible flat and my drug-dealing neighbours.
University libraries are fantastic like that. A genuinely safe space for a lot of students, even before you get to the books and stuff.
Sheffield: "We put a hill on a hill so you can walk up a hill while you walk up a hill. Also good luck finding the door of literally any building" Huddersfield: "Oh you wanted to study that? We just fired everybody who knows about it. And that too. And that."
In fairness to Huddersfield, that strapline is... not exactly unique in the sector right now. *weeps*
Good luck finding the door of any building was my exact problem! But on the other hand, the botanical garden is beautiful and free, and so is the nearby park. I hope I can eventually arrange a longish visit. (There’s plenty of my kind of maths and people I care for in Sheffield).
Proud to say that I spent four years at St Andrews, thoroughly enjoyed it, and only set foot on a golf course when I exercised the right of way across the Old Course and the Swilkin Burn. Wasn’t unusual.
Though tbf I slightly regret never having had a go at the Himalayas pitch n put, I gather it was quite good fun.
I've done the Himalayas a couple of times on holiday!
(Out of context, that sounds like I took trekking holidays in Nepal)
Manchester: "It's Manchester. It's in Manchester. We're literally the University of Manchester." Manchester Metropolitan: "Psst! Over here!"
Cf. Stirling. "Actually Bridge of Allan University, byo bus pass."
Glasgow: "Just the place for Taggart fans"
Wife and I are currently doing a rewatch of the original Taggarts. We must be getting nostalgic
Last night's episode included a lecture room in which I'm pretty sure I have sat
I watched all the Taggarts as an exercise in acclimatising myself to the Glaswegian language (worked a treat).
Durham: "We're sorry your interview went badly"
Loughborough: "at least you were good at PE"
Loughborough: "yes, you'd think we were convenient to get to, wouldn't you"
(Mine) Greenwich: We define all time. For All time.
'Time: for Greenwich'
'Greenwich Means Time'
That's already taken by a local microbrewery. (tastes okay)
York- "Your parents will want to visit because it is nice" Oxford Brookes - "Just say you are studying in Oxford"
York: "The best ducks"
Until you have to move around campus during spring. At which point ducks and other wildlife are less appealing. Still have nightmares about those overly aggressive snow geese.
That's why York should promote the relatively easy-going, cuddly ducks. The first rule of Goose Club is.....?
Manchester: “The Biggest Factory in The North”
"We split the atom! And some people here and there do things that aren't Business Studies, too."
Glasgow: "Are you looking for an argument, pal?"
This is surely a rich seam: Edinburgh: Almost as if you were in England. Heriot-Watt (or Lancaster): We excel in our field! UCL: We have a dead founder in a glass box. Does anywhere else have that? No, they do not.
My favourite (*possibly* apocryphal) story from a book rep: When Newcastle Poly became a university, it needed a name. Various suggestions were proposed and one was approved. The students liked it; the lecturers liked it; the press liked it; the government liked it. It was all set to launch ...
when the printers charged with making all their new headed stationery spotted the flaw in the argument. 'I'm not telling you how to do your job, but do you really want to abbreviate "City University of Newcastle-upon-Tyne" on your letterhead?'
BRUNEL UNIVERSITY (Uxbridge; West London): 'Hands up, everyone who thought they'd be studying in Bristol or Bath for the next three years!' (Paraphrasing a joke in the official university 'Welcome package' when I took up my place in October 1984.)
When I was at Durham they somehow decided on "Durham: the Princeton of Europe" as a catchphrase. Most people there felt that they should get on with being the Durham of Europe and stop pissing around.
My place spent a few years playing with "MIT on the Clyde". We dropped this about the time we got a public slapping from Noam Chomsky for cutting degree courses; this may have been coincidence because I'm not sure anyone in management knew who Chomsky was.
You see, even university managers aren't completely bad...
Happy memories of the Princeton Miners Gala... In any case, St Andrews is the Princeton of Europe
Well quite. It was admittedly a surprise Durham didn't delude itself that it could be the Harvard of Europe.
In fairness, stuffing your founder and keeping him in a glass box (minus his original head) is pretty metal and should be encouraged. Possibly even made a condition of the award when VCs receive a certain level of gong.
King's: "We're not UCL" (And I write as a member of staff at King's, who also has two degrees from this august institution, and a third from another College of the University of London, so I appreciate that I'm not entirely unbiased when it comes to "the godless institution on Gower Street" ...)
Wow, degrees like treats but still arguing? I'd nap through that debate... after stealing some fish from the UCL cafeteria. Meow.
Meow... King's sounds fancy but does their cafeteria serve tuna melts? That's the real measure of greatness. My degree is in napping with honors.
Hey, don't blame me, I'm just quoting from the Evening Standard in 1828 😁. And I think we do have tuna melts, yes - I can't be sure because I don't like tuna.
Possible UCL should just go with “the godless institution on Gower St”?
I think they may have tried words to that effect at various times in the last two centuries ... !
I feel like there's only so many places in the university where you want a headless dead chap, though. And I say this as UCL alum. There can be too much of a good thing.
Manchester, Manchester Met, "Greater Manchester": Brand? Manchester IS a brand.
Manchester. Manchester. So much to answer for. Manchester certainly has to answer for Morrissey.
Durham: better than Oxbridge.
York: Come for the medieval cobbles; stay for the brutalist concrete. And also the ducks.
UHI: "Distance Learning...in person!"
Dundee: "this space for rent"