A snack /ball throw machine that gives kisses and scratches? I'm weird enough for most already

That might even be too aspirational. LOL. My big old German Shepherd is currently laying on my lap.

😀

The..the food dispenser?

Jono agrees

I want to be the person who my cat could care less if I am or not.

I don't know if many of us could live up to that expectation, though we should try to.

My dog thinks I'm a horrible, treat withholding monster. She's currently sulking.

Love this

Instructions unclear, became the person my cat thinks I am.

It is time that I begin my Metamorphosis! INTO MY TRUE FORM!

❤️🐶❤️🐶

they keep raising the bar!

I could never be that wonderful.

My non-existent canine companion thinks I am a monster. I do not think I should listen to my non-existent canine companion.

The way my love bug looks at me has me all in my feels. 🥰

Are you sure that look isn't for the biscuit in your hand 😉

Yeah, you’re probably right! 😂😂

So good to see you here!

She thinks I'm a playmate

My goal every day!

I wish I could… my dogs think I’m independently wealthy, should never leave the house (or at least not without them) and have $$$ for endless toys and treats! I SO want to be that person!

🤗

www.threads.net/@iampolitics...

Love the cup 🥤 Luna says hello 😸

Necklace by groovy jewelry artist www.webbartgallery.com/margaret-sul...

... the person who passes out chewy bones?

Noooooo

And always remember DonOLD *rump does not have a dog. He does not like dogs. It appears he is actually afraid of dogs.

I really shouldn't bite people.

I have this as a tshirt and I love how everyone innately gets what it means too.

All of a sudden I’m full of tears. I miss my first pet so much and I just realized what I might mean to her.

A chew toy?

Be the person your cat thinks you should be. 😻

I Love This!!

My dog doesn't give a fuck about me.

Great thought

🐶🐶

Just follow you! 🤗✨

I don’t have a dog

My dog can’t work out how to get through a half open door. Not sure I value his opinion!

I have 2 cats. They think I'm the help. 🙃🥰

Mine, too, lol...

I am the food bringer! The disperser of snackies! The custodian of cuddles! BEHOLD MY GLORY!

someone worthy of all those precious tail wags

The one that feeds her or the one that accidentally knocked a folding chair over on top of her? I think she thinks of those differently.

Probably.

I am

💙💙💙💙

I am… god?

😄

My dogs think I'm fucking mental

Mine too 😂😂😂

explains all the treats I give myself

🩵🙋🏻‍♀️

I just love this!! 💜

what if my dog thinks I'm an idiot

Nah

Pretty sure this is the person my dog thinks I am.

lol, thanks I needed a laugh.

He's looking at me right now 😂

Also…

Why is your name spelled wrong Mark Hamill?

I try! ❤️🐶

For Mark: 🍰 Welcome Buddy!

I'm a gluttonous, selfish doorman.

I really like that!

This one thinks I’m there too lean on.

He (Chewie) thinks I'm a really funny guy. You know, in a dry sort of way. He's probably right.

My dog is inbred and likes to bite me

Wow, what a great Motto!

Always

Or your cat… I know they are aloof but they really do like to snuggle.

A food hoarder? 🤣

Love this. Goals

Sweet message!

My cat sent this to me and I’m confused

Thank god we didnt lose you to the screaming void. I hope your brain inst too sore and that your managing to process.

At least try!!!

I have a non-existent dog with non-existent dog thoughts, so being nothing comes very easily to me. I dread to think what my cat thinks of me. Not great at the moment. I'm on eyedrop duty.

I don't want to be a vending machine / massage robot.

💯

I am the person my cat thinks I am... a food server and a permanent pillow. 😜👍

I just have cats and sadly, I am exactly who they think I am

💙

That would be nobody.

There are still some good people in the world although sometimes it doesn’t feel like it.

He has so much attitude, it can't be good thoughts 😩

Guarding my human while he is sleeping.

I try every single day and night! 🐾🐾 My dog is the best office mate ever! 😍🥰

So right!

That is hard.

What if my dog is hyper critical of me?

I love this post so much

A God?

Oh believe me, we are not playing here snd treat our little lady of leisure very well

Impossible 😅

Yeah, well, Not sure about that. He and I often end up rolling around on the floor growling at each other over a bone. Not sure WHAT he thinks I are....

I'm the person who gives her all the treats!

You’re a good person .

Absolutely

I couldn't live up to that. My dog has no idea that I'm a grumbling potty mouth most of the time, because each time I look at her my heart melts.

I brought tacos for everyone 🌮🌮🌮... Who wants to go on a walk?

As long as you’re owner, isn’t the governor of South Dakota….

This really means a lot☺️

💙🙏💙

bsky.app/profile/call...

do or do not, there is no try!

That's tough because kizzy, Yorkshire, worships the ground I walk on but we, Labrador, very much sees me as the spare human

Words I've tried to live by since 1999.

Thank you for coming! ❤️❤️❤️

What if your dog thinks you're an asshole? 🤣🐕‍🦺

Impossible standard

Impossible standard

My cat says no 😼

Beautiful! I miss my baby lady like crazy!

📌

My dog thinks I am a mattress. 🤣

Lovely photo you're her comfort zone. Max sometimes doses give me a whole different kind of vibe but he's still my buddy 😊

My dog thinks I’m a chronically late-to-dinner harpy with a poor notion of personal space and appalling inflexibility with regard to his (lack of) desire to do stairs at his age. I also keep taking him out to pee when there’s a perfectly suitable floor in the morning room, which he considers rude.

Then I guess I’m a pillow.

The human who doesn’t feed them all day everyday. I’m constantly judged around here.

I'll try🐾🐾

My dog thinks I'm a bed. Maybe a heated bed. She is sleeping on my lower back while I try to type this

Like that

❤️🐶❤️

We don't deserve them. They are the best.

My daily goal.

I try but Ginger is so damn sweet

She's so huggable🤗

My dog thinks I vanish for 8 hours and then randomly reappear. I don’t know if I can be that.

Always! 🙌🏻❤️🩷

My dogs know I'm an arse so I'll just keep on being an arse then

Unless it’s Kristi Noem then don’t be that poor dogs owner.

I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm a badass secret agent.

🔥

🐶

Right now she thinks I am the one who only feeds her twice a day when she’s sure it should be 6 times.

And what does my dog think of me exactly???, Because I don't know, I am not a dog whisperer, Woof Woof...😅😅😅

I try everyday.

My dog thinks I’m an asshole… he always sniffs me when I come home. Whelp… when in Rome…

My dog looks at me like I'm a lazy asshole that never walks him so idk if this works. (I walk him 2.5 miles almost every day byt.)

❤️🐾

Like!

And cat(s)

I like cats

Or, in my case, my cat

Max is special ❤️ he's everything to me 🥰

I favor cats. The pets that have absolutely no illusions about who you are, and aren't familiar with the "benefit of the doubt" concept. But yeah, if you have a dog, aim to match their opinion of you!

I think my person is too stingy with the treats. Also waaaaaaay too trusting of the squirrels

I am, my DOG thinks I’m GOD 🐕🫶🤗😂🙏

Indeed!

Someone once said, "I can tell what type of person you are just by seeing how you treat animals." So true.

A cheese delivery system?

Yes, absolutely 🥰🙏💙⛅🫂💕

I guess I'll need to take God classes when I get a dog...

Me:

That would be a chef and a maid, unfortunately.

this is a fake accnt, folks. Best to block these fugazis now.

So .... A cruel mistress who STARVES I tell you STARVES her goodest girls but nevertheless gives good belly scratches. Got it.

🐶

Finally you’re here to save us!

❤️😍🐾🤗

My dog thought I was a lamp post

I'm her pet!

Here is my support dog Beanie

That's an impossible standard, but we can only try.

My bathroom has a far less attractive view...

The treat lady!

A person who can instantly flip from playing to yelling to stop chasing the chickens?

This is THE guiding principle in my home and it works

💙💙💙💙💙

Our Charlotte 🩷

Yes!

👍

GOT THAT @officialmarkhammil.bsky.social the real MARK HAMILL is here. At least his pic is... and yes his name is misspelled. And we certainly need #THEFORCE to Be WITH US. #ThatIsTheWay

I’m the person my cat thinks I am (beneath contempt)

A humorous response …

www.threads.net/@iampolitics...

It’s a high bar but I try!

I want to be the cat, my cat thinks I should be.

That's going to be tough, Mark. when I adopted her from the mean streets of Oakland, I told her we were rich. May she never find out otherwise.

💖and cat😸

My dog knows how horrible I am and loves me without expectations. 💀

I have this on a coaster on my desk as my daily reminder!

My dog thinks that I am the weakest link when it comes to treats.

It’s a high bar, but I’ll try.

I think I am. But I will try harder. Belly scratches anyone?

She is so forgiving. She’s Whitby because she’s jet black, she joined our family on International Dracula Day 6 years ago & she’s a total Goth.

Solid.

or your cat!!!!!

Ah wise up

Right now, my dogs think I'm the person who loves them so much that I take them out at 4:30am because of the time change....Momma needs some rest.

Dogs are God's best things.

So glad you are here! 🥰

I’ll be the person my cat could care less about.😪

A can opener?

the lunch lady 😁

My girl knows I'm a Trump hating fur mom, we're good.