This week, Mr Pip has barked at Savilleian barbers Lobscouse Charlton Athletic Variegated anything Synonyms A Flock of Seagulls Lanthanides Puttees Pangolins The absence of Woolworths Crypto zoology Mince Leviathans Popcorn Corduroy Treadmills and, Sheffield.
Very fine Barkings, Mr Pip
Great Barking Mr Pip
Few years back Paddy barked at too much light & space. Didn’t seem that bothered about barking at The Sea, Sand, nothing specific. Just… I need to bark at the whole world in front of me.
Cryptozoology? As a concept, or a specific such as the beast of Bodmin?
These fearsome creatures bark back (they have mates in Sheffield).
Great Barkings Mr Pip! They were all asking for it, especially the puttees.
Oh no, not Pangolins? It was going ok until then ...
So, Mr Pip barks at ‘popcorn’ and ‘pangolins’—sounds like a tasty crypto snack mix! If only Bitcoin grew on trees like popcorn, we’d be the richest raccoons in Canada by now!
Bleedin' lanthanides, thinking they're so rarified. Bloody deserve a good barking.
Barkings: The absence of Woolworths: Where do kids steal a boiled sweet from now ?🤷🏻♀️ Treadmills: Going nowhere… Popcorn: You’re salty with no butter Mince: Initially not nice when cooking, but really can’t complain about dishes made with it ! (Lasagne) Lanthanides: Most can be licked ! (58-71)
But if it's crypto zoology can he really see it?
He must know something about pangolins that I don't, unless he was barking encouragement to a gentle, harmless creature endangered by human greed and stupidity.
🙂
I seem to recall we had some Solar Weather activity this past week, leading to the Aurora Borealis coming into view a bit further south than usual, so not that surprised A Flock of Seagulls were trotted out onto the playlist for him to bark at.
Australia has Woolworths. Take him on jollybobs
Wülferhampton Top Table when the mead flows. No wonder he barked.
Who the fuck gave you access to the CCTV?
I’m a fucking phantom. How do you think I got it. BTW please can you sing or something when you’re in the bath. I drifted through the wall unawares last bath night¹ and it was disquieting². ¹ couple of months ago ² traumatic
Not so much ‘love’ as ‘morbid fascination’.
You're the reason I get held up every Friday on the M5/M6 interchange you rubber necking prick.
Been driving for umpteen years have you? Never had an accident? Seen hundreds.
OMG! Are you saying he's Jasper Carrott's mother?
It's Wülferhampton. Anything is possible.
Everybody's Talking About Wulfie!
He's terribly clever. I had to ask Mr Google about a fair proportion of them thar barks.
Squirrels never seem to make the list?
Kill on sight policy.
They're under standing orders. My 🐕 has got to the point where she barks at the wind rustling the top branches 🙄
Again pangolins?
The man who cuts my hair now used to live in Spain and did in fact work as a barber in Seville and no one had ever picked up on that before I made a merry quip about it.
Wasn't "The Absence of Woolworths" a Half Man Half Biscuit B-side?
No. But it should have been.
I can only assume you've kept him well away from coverage of the Reform conference?
Bet he wouldn't be barking at the seaman's stew/corn beef hash if he had some.
He's on a protein balanced diet, so, no.
Fair enough, apart from Lobscouse. A Viking culinary delight. We brought that to your shores a while ago. Mostly around Liverpool but also Blackpool, which were both towns we set up to trade with Dyflin, one of the ports we held in Ireland at the time. BTW, Dyflin means black pool!
Sheffield had it coming.
But Charltons my team!!!
Dogs always make my day. Great work Mr. Pip.
Great work? Like he amuses you? Like he's some kind of clown?
Absolutely Corduroy, especially the mustard coloured type, well barked Mr P
Is he baking at mince or in excitement because of mince. I mean he's a dog and it's food...
Excellent barkings Mr Pip! I bemoan the absence of Woolworths every day.
He should be laughing at the clowns, not barking at them. Throwing little pink pigs onto the pitch sometimes works as well, apparently.
Some controversial barkings there, Mr Pip - may have to adulterate your master's wine in reewengay. P.S. Is Crypto Zoology animals dealing in Bitcoin?
Flock of seagulls? Popular 1980s beat combo?
Yes. I've beaten at least 1980 Seagulls to death. Does that get me an extra coffee?
Several.
Awwww. That wee face.
We've done this before. It was tedious then. It's more so now. THREE. TEEFS! Be warned.
Did he get an implant or grow another one?
He's actually got six. But three is the most he'd waste on your rancid carcass. He tells me.
Four new teeth? That's quite the dental miracle!
You’re assuming the Titanium Tit was sober when he counted them.
Titanium Tit 🏆😂😂😂😂
Cryptozoology, you say? Has Mr.Pip been visiting the lepers at the gate again?
Puttees eh? Understandable.
Darling Mr Pip. Such a good boy. Heroic- putting up with the rusty bucket hat-boy
Why 🥺
Yeah. Why bark at them when you could kick them like a football?
Reticulated is fine, but variegated is right out. I'm not arguing with a python or a giraffe. Those fuckers kick. (not pythons)
He was thinking of hedges. But you do you.
I cannot fathom the mind of Mr Pip. & I have tried. Bensons Hedges It's surprising what litter he might find to bark about.
B&H - I gave up smoking when they went up to £1.20 for 20
At the time that did seem expensive! Recently, a friend asked me to pick up a 30g pouch of rolling tobacco. £25. I'm so glad I don't smoke nowadays.
Me too the GP said it was that long ago now that I should tick the ‘never smoked’
Suggest you find him some therapy - he’s obviously one angry pooch!
Labskaus? He’s made a (corned beef) hash of his barkings this week.
lobscouse, a hearty and frugal beef stew with split peas, potatoes, carrots and swede. Budget friendly and freezes well.
Hey, I’m Hanseatic, I know Labskaus, complete with herring, gherkin and a fried egg on top.
Gazuntite Hugh. Labskaus is not widely eaten in Birkenhead ; Viva la.
Lobscouse ... is this a Northumbrian sport?
