…as a heckler at the Glasgow Empire once said of Mike and Bernie Winters: “Christ, there's two of them!” I have not made any effort to contact Mr Coates in Massachusetts to inform him of this kind offer, because it’s clearly not kind, but extremely dubious
When Eric Morecambe was asked what he and Ernie Wise would be if they weren't comedians, he replied "Mike and Bernie Winters"
Yes, I just read that when I looked them up to confirm that my memory (of the heckle) was right. A great line from Morecambe, that
Bizarre discovery to make first thing in the morning, though. And discovering that I have an exact namesake raises the question of what I’ll do when an enterprising publisher sees sense and offers me a million-dollar contract for a book of weird history…
Ooh, an update. This is a keen scammer (as you would be, I suppose, if you thought authors were easy marks)
![Screenshot of email from Sylvain Marigold: Re: [rocket emoji] Helping Erased find its readers and reviews Hi [waving emoji] I just wanted to kindly follow up on my previous message. I completely understand you may be busy working on your book or the next one [book and stars emojis], but I’d really love the chance to hear your thoughts. As a quick reminder, I’m part of a private community of readers and reviewers who genuinely enjoy supporting authors by boosting visibility through honest reviews, discussions, and exposure. We’ve already worked with other authors, and it’s always exciting to see how much impact it brings. No rush at all just thought I’d check in and see if this might be something you’d be interested in exploring. [smiley face emoji] Looking forward to hearing from you whenever you get the chance. Warm regards,](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:vckf3haopb3yncclmf7o2m3f/bafkreicbbjxiy2lpxfi3tzbseag2hxthpuvzcjjmx6pvzcr5cayejd7kee@jpeg)
Tempting though it is to reply with a lecture about the importance of cursory research if you want to discover that I reside in Essex, not Massachusetts, I think the greatest public service here is done by ignoring, so that Ms(?) Marigold continues to waste her time
Fuck me, Marigold’s persistent. And the longer this goes on, the more tempting it is to reply...
![Re: [ricket emoji] Helping Erased find its readers and reviews Hi [wave emoji], I just wanted to kindly follow up on my previous message. I completely understand you may be busy working on your book or the next one [book, stars emojis], but I’d really love the chance to hear your thoughts. As a quick reminder, I’m part of a private community of readers and reviewers who genuinely enjoy supporting authors by boosting visibility through honest reviews, discussions, and exposure. We’ve already worked with other authors, and it’s always exciting to see how much impact it brings. No rush at all just thought I’d check in and see if this might be something you’d be interested in exploring. [smiley face] Looking forward to hearing from you whenever you get the chance. Warm regards,](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:vckf3haopb3yncclmf7o2m3f/bafkreifxcwrfyl5thvgepr5wg3wvzk5oq5tsh2td5uuhmihdps5jjsh5mm@jpeg)
Blimey, it was a week between messages before. Things are hotting up
Finally put my finger on what Sylvaine Marigold / Marigold Sylvaine reminds me of: Martin Amis’ reversible cab driver names in Money. Always loved the line “Or maybe it was Wypijewski Si”
How much will they charge to do down your rivals?
Ooh, good question. That could be something to put to them
I think Marigold Sylvaine works much better than Sylvaine Marigold I’ll get the popcorn ready if you tell her
I have several namesakes including a musician in 'Bark Psychosis' and a meteorologist (dec) responsible for releasing anthrax on Gruinard Island. 😬
Surely I have shared with you my surprise on first day at Uni seeing your name on the fellow students list? I was at school with a Chris Coates and wondered aloud to Hollis if it was him. He told me no, it was *his* school chum, not mine
Oh, you may have told me that, but I forgot. It rings a vague bell. I now picture him saying it with an air of 'oh dear: Coates'
Have you ordered a copy though?
Well, call me a terrible snob, but I still prefer published to self-published. So many books, so little time. We have to whittle them down somehow...