“war, what is it good for?” - Tolstoy

The fact we need reminding, after millennia of it, is worse.

Committing atrocities because you have nukes to hide behind is even worse.

it's very profitable.

Agreed

Good thing the anti-war candidate got elected!

But good business I hear.

Can’t believe you have such a hot take

"Low Rider" is not that bad a song.

mmmkay

Anyone remember who made the tee shirts in the 1960s that said: War is not healthy for children and other living things Because I want one again.

I preferred Edwin Star's version, gonna to be honest...

the trump admin right now:

Note to trainer: It’s both immoral & ineffective to threaten an animal with violence to achieve training outcomes. Have you tried praise? Treats? Palantir™️?

more news at 9

Unless it's killing nazis, or rebelling against a despot government. Eventhen it's not preferred it's merely the only sane option. Cuz otherwise you die.

Iran has a right to defend itself duh /j

No shit.

War. What is it good for?

I'll get even braver here: egging on nuclear war is even worse.

Yeah. Scrolling even faster because war mongers. Also noted the stock traders are very excited which means things will suck for a lot of the working class soon because War Good Culture Bad. On the other I'm playing more video games.

well fuck Tim we're gonna wake up the mole people

China/Russia seeing WW3 might kicking off with most of America's troops/tanks in DC.....

Honestly, if you wanted a real WW3 Pearl Harbor moment, that would absolutely be a helluva way to kick it off. But the U.S.'s enemies would never do that because they know that the current administration in DC causes us more harm by staying alive.

😂

Actual nuclear war would top that.

More nukes so people don't use nukes or everyone dies gambit. Cold war 2 electric boogaloo? too soon?

But what if you’re being cross-examined in your corruption trial and the parliment almost dissolves? Is war still bad then, smart guy?

radiation is an evolution unlock

Am I at least allowed to edge on nuclear war? Need to know quickly please.

Oh good I'm gonna meltdown nnnnggghh

Where is my “I’d Rather Be Vaporized” bumper sticker, TimOnion? Where?

Parades are nice...

What's bad about it? Israel hits Iran, Pakistan hits Israel, India hits Pakistan, Russia hits India, we hit Russia, we enter nuclear winter, modern civilization ends, and the planet starts healing after a few decades or so. So other than that, I mean.

It's one way to deal with global warming

And overpopulation

Haven't you heard, overpopulation isn't a problem, anymore, because the rich figured out they need more proles for the portfolios.

Ah, thanks for the update. The bastards.

Whoa whoa whoa. I feel you are crossing a red line here

How am I supposed to get nails like these without nuclear war?

I'm thinking full asteroid strike...

Right on top of tel-aviv

Takes too hot to handle

You can't hug your children with nuclear arms...

Yah, Its kindah obvious isnt it? Trump & Netanyahoo way underestimate the worlds intellectual capacity

'Nuclear winter' as an anti-global warming strategy, I'm sure it'll be fine.

Fallout was right predicted the whole thing

I'm starting to think that whatever's in those Epstein files that Elon was talking about might have been a big deal...

But what if I really really want the world to end before Q3

the hottest take

bsky.app/profile/news...

The brave Onion man we need in these trying times. Seriously though, Threads should be mandatory viewing for all humans.

Well what else am I supposed to do with my Friday night

do you even know why Putin doesn't try to take Alaska back? threat of WWIII, every minute of every day

bsky.app/profile/popp...

In all seriousness. Absolutely. The damage both short term and long is too much for the planet to bear. And if we do have secret societies of aliens living under ground, who have left us alone all this time? I think we may rouse the mole people.

But have you tried sparkling war?

Trump said last year that we were going to be engaged in ww3 if Kamala got elected, it appears he was projecting as usual.

Wow. Like wow man. Wow

Really? I never knew.

is this a bit

Trump, Putin and Netanyahu are all in trouble. So blow up The Middle East to hang on to their dwindling power. Beware of Executive War Powers The shit George Bush needed to invade Iraq. The cause of Torture Memos The Patriot Act now being used against US!

Unhealthy For Children and Other Living Things.

I don't know, Tim. I don't think any future election is going to push these yahoos out. When they bring militia into a state to overrule the elected officials, that's a coup. I'm not sure we will overcome these nasties without some war here.

M’kay

Wow, why are you so anti-semitic?

War is here.

War. Huh. What is it good for?

War, it ain't nothin' but a heartbreaker War, it's got one friend that's the undertaker

Absolutely munitions makers. Say it again yall.

fuckin sucks

Been there. Done that. Anyone who has been there will agree.

Invasions are worse…

But good for certain business... Nothing like war to jumpstart sluggish economies. Age old remedy. Europe is having to do it because of a looming threat. The US does it for the money...

whoa hey come on do not jump to conclusions about complicated issues 🤓

people die when they are killed 😞☯️

when they die they no longer get to drink coffee and this is sad

Easy there, cowboy. Let’s examine all sides of this.

By Chris Cillizza

💀

“The Democrats that are being unfair.”

🤣 no boyz let's wait & let the dems do some polling on this issue first, then we can make a rational decision.

And now to Jake Tapper to explain how this is Biden's fault

Some folks WANT to run headlong into a buzz saw.

who am i to violate their civil liberties with my red tap regulations

Not when it ends evil regimes like Iran

Is a war against fascists bad? Is a war against slaveowners bad? is a war against your colonizers bad?

Yes! The fact that we'd have to resort to war due to any of these things is bad! People shouldn't have to die! The thought that it isn't is the thought that the ends justify the means, but does it? Both sides have casualties. Even if you win a war, it doesn't mean that war was good.

They never declare war on poverty or hunger. I could get behind wars like those.

Mmm-kay

Depends who your sell your arms to then it could be very good 💰💰💰

I dunno, it may not be U2’s best album but I like it!

Sunday Bloody Sunday, 40 -- both solid tracks!

And New Year’s Day. I also like Two Hearts Beat as One.

Did you know if you bomb another country. They *might* bomb you back?!?

Donald Trump is worse

War is bad. Some people are asking what is it good for? Absolutely nothing, I tell them.

BREAKING NEWS

of course it's a liberal

shut up

Usually

but tim onion, think about all the poor starving war profiteers who would go hungry without war! /j

Orange Mussolini is bad

I know right!? I'll take care of it in a bit, I'm just a little preoccupied with being tiny at the moment :/

What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!

The authorities need to be informed!

Big if true

But not such bad timing for Trump going into a weekend of terrible and embarrassing international coverage for the birthday boy.

Always… it represents failure!

When I worked with Greenpeace decades ago the Gov sent cops and dogs after us at nuke dump protests so expect Rittenhouse at this juncture.

Indeed.

I'm so tired of this echo chamber

Especially on Trump's watch.

NYT: Coastal liberals say war is "bad" but here at Kurt's Diner in Earlstown, Ohio, everyone I talked to owns an M82 and is ready to make their weekend hobby a full-time job.

Psh since WHEN?

It sucks diddly poo

I thought Edwin Starr covered this already? 🧐 youtu.be/01-2pNCZiNk?...

I LOVE this song!

The duality of man

vs no its not

M'kay....

Apparently it’s just a game to Senate Republicans

Not if it is to defend your home and loved ones against an evil invader called russia.

M'kay

Ah you beat me to it!

YES war is bad!

Always, Everytime!!! The only ones who Want war are those who have Never been in one. Leaders and comanders are rarely ever subject to the horrors of having their property bombed or burned to ash, or their family tortured, raped and murdered. Suffering is on us rarely them. 😓😓😓

Those Epstein records must be even worse, to be wagging the dog at this level. Was Netanyahu also a passenger on the Lolita Express?

Famine is bad.

"What is it good for-absolutely nothing"

Maybe it will topple both regimes. We can only hope.

Trump is bad.

How dare you attack the hard working people at War! They have families to feed too!

Apparently its good for absolutely nothin, too.

Amd fucking scary. How many people don't understand the reality of death. Like never seeing your kids or loved ones ever again. And our administration is focused on the wrong shit.

Woah…calm down with the antisemitism, Tim!

That sounds like propaganda from “Big Peace”

🏆

So is Iran having nuclear weapons.

N'kay?

I see you posted the short version to demonstrate that people will flip out no matter what you post... good move

But also, you should always be prepared to finish a fight that the fascists start. It's just common sense practicality.

Chat is this antisemitism?

Oh shit! Really? You know that one song that goes, "War, hngh, what is it good for? Absolutely nothing!" Yeah, makes sense now.

War is Peace

I read that as "war is back" and I thought, "when did it go away?"

And what is happening today could have been avoided if Trump wasn't such an egotistical, ignorant idiot.

War is not healthy for children and other living things.

My mother’s favorite slogan in the 1960s and 70s. She had the poster and wore the necklace. ☮️

sOurCe?!?!?!

What is it good for?

Absolutely nothing

Say it again

What is it good for? Absolutely nothing.

nothing except exposing diddy bluds

I like war youtu.be/BsrqKE1iqqo?...

But oh so profitable (which is why we are always doing it)

Yes, she is

Evil! 😭😭😭😭😭

Sure, but do you condemn peace?!?! DO YOU

Woah woah buddy, that's dangerous talk

Well how else am I supposed to kill people without consequences? Become a cop? A CEO? A lobbyist?

A military contractor, join the IDF...

Smelling napalm is good

So brave of you to use your platform to make such a controversial take

😂

.... but none of it is Trump's fault. 😏

I remember one time I was coming down off some acid, I had drifted off, not asleep, but not awake either. The room was golden hour yellow from a sun refracted through the smoke of a distant forest fire. I was unaware of time, totally chill in the serotonin soaked moment. I remember hearing a …

shitload of crows cawing in slightly offset unison when a sound starts ramping up. It was a sound we all were trained to recognize because of the civil defense flyers in school. “WTF‽” My brain changed gears and a cold sweat because the siren was howling in a wavering attack tone. I got up …

And went to the window. Pulling back the curtain revealed the orange looking sky with a couple yellow streaks that looked to be coming in from above. That can’t be good. I thought I could see little bright spots at the end of the yellow streaks. That really can’t be good. …

A few more moments of my stomach flip-flopping in not entirely unrelated to the remaining psychedelic changes made me cough. Then, the siren changed. The wavering became longer and volume trailed off. It was quiet again. Even the crows had been put off by the siren. I felt sick, and confused. …

I pulled the drape open again and looked again at those yellow streaks in the sky, and after moving my head around some, I noticed that the ends of the streaks weren’t headed to the ground, but they weren’t, I fucked up the perspective and as I watched the bright spots kept going overhead. …

“Jets … contrails … fuck.“ I turned on my stereo and the announcer said it was 12:03 PM. It was the monthly test of the sirens. Noon, 1st Wednesday of the month. Dazed and Confused came on the stereo. And then I threw up.

Rules of war: Rule #1: Young people die in war Rule #2: No one can change Rule #1

WAR IS INEVITABLE... BUY A GUN

All we are saying ... www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3_0...

Bold position there, Tim Onion. "When the battle is engaged the war is lost." Sun Tzu

So brave

Hold up

What is it good for?

Très.

And not really necessary.

Evil leaders, make it !

It never works out for anybody. But maybe this time?

Israel's Iron Dome defenses were resupplied. That's very good for the MIC. $$$$$

Narrator: It won’t

Raytheon Exec: “I’m tired of wiping my ass with silk. Need to upgrade to literal gold leaf. I needs it”

Bibi spent a lot of time outside of Philly as a kid. I was hoping someone would do the SNL "Murder Durder" sketch but with Bibi trying to figure out who sabotaged the West Bank-Gaza political deals and then realizing it was himself the whole time.

🤬⛔🚫📡🛰️

Peace is baderer (if you’re a despotic male politician)

Take a shower you damn hippie!

Current president doesn't think so, he just started a new one.

Not according to capitalism! Damn liberals

Huge if true

Whoa whoa whoa... are you saying Israel doesn't have the right to defend itself from things that haven't happened?!

There is only one true war, the class war

As a kid listening to Tom Lehrer, I didn’t get that the line “it takes a certain amount of courage to come out in favor of things that everyone else is against, like peace and justice and brotherhood” was a joke because it did seem like everyone was against those. Feels that way again.

Whereas occupation and Apartheid is based and very cool.

This is exclusionary against all non-wars!

It is always unpredictable.

Not for my stock port folio 📈📊 BAZINGO! ᵢ 𝒹ₒₙ’ₜ ₕₐᵥₑ ₐₙᵧ ₛₜₒ𝒸ₖₛ

M'kay! Mr. Mackey has weighed in.

Especially within our borders and it has started with the assassination in MN and troops on the ground in Los Angeles.

Mmkay?

Mmmkay!

Yeah but it gets us cool model kits of giant robots

Genocide is more than bad.

War is so bad, even our soldiers that come home are scarred

Eat the rich?

And…

Excellent book. An hour read tops. Smedley Butler

"no way to prevent this," says man pushing button to launch missiles

Imagine reporting in the last month of the 2024 election that Democrats were responsible for war as if the word "war" was newly coined

Another lunatic leftist obsessed with purity smh

Yes it is.

Being able to kick the shit out of someone who attacks you is cool.

yah. it’s hard to feel bad for anyone but the civilians here though. it’s like shitheads fighting with fuckheads and a bunch of people that don’t want any of this shit are caught in the middle.

You're talking crazy

But some assholes insist upon it. And the only way to stop it is to drop a bomb on their head

War is bad. Genocide is a crime against humanity. Autocrats should be removed from power. Just not *THIS* war, *THAT* genocide and *THESE* autocrats.

i wonder if there are any songs about this

Hmmm, generally, yes, but you must understand that sometimes strength of arms is necessary to ensure peace.

Whoah there Ben, are you some kind of radical subversive?

Always. War is always bad.

Wack

Mkay

How dare you have such a brave, yet controversial oppinion?? 😮

Mmmkay

Hot take!

How dare you >:[

Source????

Me Want food

Sometimes

Now steady on

hot take there