🤮

🤮what a groveling puke face why?

Paying tribute to Dear Leader.

Tim Onion > Tim Apple

fucking sad

So Tim Cook is cool with gifting pedophiles. Congrats pig. Survivors never forget. 🖕

The knee pad industry is booming under this administration.

Some real Idi Amin shit here.

it gets worse

Tell me this is just an Ocean's 13 remake.

Gghhaaah😖

sick: I hope he scrubbed his face when that mess was over! also: Cook says the gold bar is from CA, the engraved glass is off the Corning line (that's upstate NY), & the base is from Utah - & then our so-called commander in chief says "the great people of Kentucky" - WTF IS HE TALKING ABOUT???

Right? Tim Cook is from Alabama.

Trump can't wait to get his tiny fingers on it, look how eagerly he leaves the podium.

Let’s hope someone is writing this down because Presidents receive gifts on behalf of the United States and when he tries to take this back to his resort after his presidency - which he will - that will be theft. Another felony.

Is it paperwork showing he legally changed his name to Tim Apple?

Wow.

Remember to cup the balls, Tim.

Note: Trump announcing 100% tariffs on chips, is displeased with the goldiness.

Trump is going to be really disappointed that he can’t take it to the other side…

Everything is just a meme now.

It's a bribe over the tariffs.

Cocksuckers, all of them republikkkans ..

The tech bros are unbelievably cowardly. It's such an embarrassment. It's hard to believe that they don't worry about the respect of their kids and grandkids. Money won't erase the stain.

“Thank you for the rich-people tax cuts! I will now publicly debase myself.”

Trump will lather the dome of the white house in gold On the outside So Americans always remember their first Russian president

These groveling candyasses would’ve paid their taxes. We could have had universal health care.

Ass kisser

Gag… gag….. gag

Pathetic

When do you get on your knees to complete the deal Tim?

If you can’t say Fuck You to power, what good is being one of the wealthiest people in the world? What a cuck.

Let's give him a 24 carat casket and throw him in to the sea.

Tim, hast du das schon mal ausprobiert?

Ngl, looks like shit.

His name is Tim Apple, damnit!

Sickening 🤢

He protected stockholder value and will avoid tariffs paid by his customers for the price of a tchochke.

The way to approval from Trump is through his wallet

this looks like a segment on the shopping channel

what if someone showed up with a 24k gift, but it was like a taco, or a catheter...

These guys will all understand what it means to be an oligarch soon. It doesn’t go so well… check Putin’s record on oligarchs and those close to him.

Interesting, considering the promised PedoPhone is about to be released by the child rapist. Wait...it's not? But he said...oh...

Oh did I not set up Face Recognition on my iPhone? Huh weird that…

Fuck I hate Apple now.

Steve Jobs would have none of this.

🤢🤮🤮

A fucking corporate trophy gift picked out of a catalog... Fitting.

Pathetic people, aren't they.

Just because transnational corporations are based in the US doesn’t mean they support democracy. They’re all about selling goods in as many countries as possible, regardless of the type of government. They’re fine dealing with dictators to do business. And this is an example of how they do it.

It’s sickening but a strategic move because Apple can’t bring iPhone or iMac production back to the USA. This is like distracting a cat with a shiny object.

ya I gotta admit Tim really knew what he was doing there. he knew *exactly* where to lick Trump's taint. that stupid gold pedestal he placed on the Resolute Desk just saved Apple investors a shit ton of money

This is disgusting.

Imagine Tim Cook licking a President Bernie Sanders’ balls for instituting a wealth tax, raising the corporate tax, empowering labor unions, or using antitrust to break up Big Tech. You can’t because Big Business is ok with an autocracy it can bargain w/ but not ok w/ systemic bottom up change.

This sounds exactly like Italian corporations kowtowing to Mussolini in WWII.

So disappointing.

Tim Apple...

Thankful to have never owned an Apple product.

Another reason Apple sucks and always has. Every update actually makes something worse.

Congratulations Mr Prezidunce

Sad.

It's like the "I'm a Mac, I'm a PC" but in reverse...

Anderson Cooper really let himself go

Where is the backlash against Apple products that Tesla suffered? Are people that addicted to their toys?

Yes, yes they are. I am due for a new computer and it looks like time for something with Ubuntu on it.

elon musk went on a terror spree throughout washington destroying departments, copying files and firing people. tim cook gave an idiot a gold plated trophy.

It's still kissing the Ring of a tyrant.

Wonder what Steve Jobs would make of this. They are all afraid of Trump with good reason. We, the voting public are responsible for this. This is still a democracy for now. We are living with the result of an election. Personally I will give Cook a somewhat disgusted pass on this. Us, I don’t.

Yeah, I'll join to express some sympathy (?) that Apple is just incredibly exposed to Trump's insanity... OTOH it seems like we should have some Snyder-type rules for CEOs like "do not lick boots in advance or more than absolutely necessary".

He loves golden showers

Tim Onion, you need to talk to your cousin Tim Apple.

So gross

Looks like something you put together the night before the assignment is due. Tacky and dumb AF.

This is like watching the Marx Bros in the 1930's

This feels like a history book moment under the heading “American Business Capitulation to the MAGA regime”

Look at all the old white men grinning at the latest grift. The worst government that money can buy.

And while some may see them as the crazy ones We see genius Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can bribe a sociopathic fascist into submission Are the ones who do

Tim Onion cooks Tim Apple

One soulless mutherfucker kissing ass to another.

A disgrace to the Tim name.

F this shit

Jobs is reassembling himslef in some Chinese factory to kick Tim Cucks ass for this here bullshit!

Rotten Apple been kissing his ass since he won.

One of the worst things I’ve ever seen

Looks like someone has been blackmailed 🤔

It would be terribly embarrassing if everyone added the words 'Epstein' or 'Pedogate' to their Bluesky handle

Gift? More like a bribe. Trump demands personal high value ‘gifts’ in return for preferential treatment Thats a bribe by any definition

Awful

My comment when I saw this earlier: “I long ago lost respect for the POTUS buffoon and the Tesla buffoon and have now lost it for the Apple buffoon. American billionaire buffoonery proliferates.”

“Billionaire buffoonery” I am immediately adopting that term. Perfect

It was approved by The Federal Bribery Agency, with its new bribery czar, David Dennison.

John Barron assisted

24k lahbewbew :o

I'll take "Self-polishing Apples" for $1,000

Could you imagine if Steve Jobs did that?

Tim Apple can eat a bag of dicks

Another one bites the dust.

We’re so fucked.

Ha, there goes Apple stock. Just saying.

Oh, crapple!

Is that Tim Apple’s twin brother? Huh

What did Kentucky have to do with this?

Tim Apple-shiner

Paying tribute to the King. Pitiful and excruciatingly embarrassing.

Tim Cooked

My OnePlus 7 Pro is at least 6 years old so I've been considering getting a replacement within the next year and I was still undecided on whether to get my first iPhone or stick with Android. Glad to see that Timothy D. Apple has made this decision (and all related future ones!) suddenly very easy!

What a disgrace!

He might as well just give him a BJ.

Tim Cooked

Tim Apple needs to grow a pear

Why do I suddenly feel like selling all my Apple products?

Same and just ordered a new MacBook, ugh.

I like and enjoy my Apple products and I will not cut off one's nose to spite one's face. However any future Apple purchase has been put on hold indefinitely.

Because we should.

I like that our side doesn't feel the need to destroy items sold by a company we no longer agree with that we already purchased like fucking lemmings.

Hell, yeah. I'm not destroying anything (but I won't be buying Apple for a while).

. I've never had an Apple device . . . ... and I never will. 🖕 these disgusting bootlickers Looking at you, Tim Apple ! 💠 😠 💠

Happy Thursday, Marko!! ❤️💙❤️

Hey, wish you a great day too . . . 💙 👋

💙

He LOOKS like a bootlicker. Doesn't he? I never try to judge a book by its nasty cover, but there's just some traitorous nazis out there that look the part. Even without the uniform. Can he spell "SS"?

Golden Sphincter award.

Quisling

we need to select one pro-Nazi businessman to make them the term like "Quisling" but for a capitalist. not an actual Nazi but a "hey these guys seem useful" capitalist

Ooh maybe he’s earned “Cookald”

Problem is that it seems like a tougher needle to thread every day

Those are just Nazis, you don't need another word

More bending at the knees. This is freaking ridiculous and sickening.

Lame af

What a spineless simp.

🤔

Amazing "this you?" post.

Great pull.

It’s disgusting what a man who needs nothing will give up for a few more dollars.

Wait, didn’t Trump pardon the insurrectionists?

Yep! But kissing his ass publicly now is all the rage. 😒

They both can kiss my 24 karat ass.

Embarrassed, Embarrassing, embarrassment are no longer words in the American vocabulary or dictionary.

Why is it ugly

What is it?

You mean 24 carat bribe. Let's not call it anything other than it is.

Time to stop associating Microsoft with bill or Melinda gates.

So…he can’t “take that with him” can he? Sounds over the ethics limit! Why wouldn’t the next guy do this too?sfs

JFC. Fuck Apple

"I bugged the Scotch."

As gross as the gold gilded oval office

I bet your spaghetti falls right through that hole, though.

I'm starting a petition to rename Tim "Tim Apple" Cook to "Tim Complicit" instead. It's not very punchy, but it's accurate.

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

Is QVC still around? QVC Tim Cook is your man.

Uh..gross.

many people have humiliated themselves publicly when appearing with Trump, but Tim was the icing on the cake today. what an embarrassment.

This just convinced my wife to get an android. I've been laying the groundwork for this moment for years. Tim Cook just helping me cross the finish line. Very appreciative of what a complete piece of shit Tim Cook has revealed himself as in this moment.

Of course it's gold because Trump is a gaudy surface level 80s guy

Two total tools in the same room

Pedophile of the year award. Tax the rich

At least Apple has been slow on AI. Hopefully deliberately slow b/c they know it’s a fucking scam.

EWWW

Glad I'm not an Apple customer. I was one, for over a decade, but got wise.

Word of the day: Genuflect To bow down in servility

😂 Trump called him “Tim Apple” and yet here he is. Add him to the pile.

Sickening

Don't matter to me, never would have bought and Apple product regardless.

This is so gross

Pathethic and corrupt

Ghost of Steve Jobs: WHAT THE FUCK AM I LOOKING AT HERE!?!?

That comes across as a bribe, I guess Im just old fashioned.

🤬🤬🤬

Tim Apple has done for Macs what Trump has done for democracy —

All the cool kids wear Apple Nazi shit? Trump regime hates gay people, a gay man kisses Trump's ass. Trump's goons are trying to destroy California, Apple HQ is in California. Apple needs a new leader. www.macworld.com/article/6718...

Peter Thiel is gay and one of the biggest supporters/proponents/masterminds of all this Project 2025 technofascist bullshit.

Thiel and Musk are two fuckers who were born outside the US and who happily fund hatred against immigrants. JD Vance's vile disgusting sugar daddy (Thiel also hurt the free press in the US when he funded the anti-union racist, Hulk Hogan). 2022: www.forbes.com/sites/zachev...

And it means nothing to Dear Leader. forgotten 2 minutes later

I wish we could get an ass kidding emoji.

Hoping Trump lowers 25% tariffs on India where a lot of his stuff is made now.

I’ve run out of companies to boycott

🤢. Gross syncophant. Kiss the germ invested ring of TyrantTrump (ruining the country )🤑 Get some self respect man!!!😲

Can you imagine Jobs or Woz doing this?

Is there an easy way to transfer my iTunes playlists to an android phone? Genuine question. Asking for when I need to buy a new phone.

Why did Trump mention Kentucky? Cook only referred to California and Utah. Does it have something to do with Kentucky or was Trump having another moment? These CEO’s grovelling to him are nauseating. They know his colours from the Musk nonsense: he will turn on you no matter what.

Giving tribute in exchange for trade privileges.

🤮

I’d like to throw my iPhone into the Pacific Ocean.

Famous power bottoms always disappoint.

And just like that, this will be my last Apple device

I'm embarrassed that this guy is the CEO of my iPad, iPhone, and Mac.🤢

“Remember me? I’m the good gays. Don’t forget me when the box cars start running.”

This administration is so flagrant with who is bribing who that they might as well start wearing gear like nascar drivers.

What the hell did I just watch?!?

You would think these “people” who were made possible by the opportunities made available by a democratic country would not aid and abet its destruction. They make me sick. To step on the necks of Americans that bought your products and made you possible shows you are a monster just like them too.

Damn I’m gonna need a new phone

When is the bribery going to stop. All these top executives kowtowing to Trump and giving him gifts worth many thousands of dollars. Unthinkable under any other regime, but now commonplace.

These Trump nut garglers will never recover from this. We will not let them forget what they did.

Don’t let the cringe distract you from the fact that this illegal

People should crash apple websites

You mean "Tim Apple"? Not the first time he's been willing to be publicly humiliated by Trump.

Fuck Tim Cook

Tim Apple trending but Tim onion trending in my dome

Gross.

I rather live like a f*cking monk that have to bend over and take it my my gold-plated supplicating arse like this filthy pathetic coward

As he always does. He represents a Corporation he wants to bleed taxpayers money from Trump to his company. Whe do we have a say where our tax dollars go.

My favourite bit was the evidence the Graphic Design Is My Passion (GDIMP dept.) team took over as it was holidays for the Apple Graphic Design department. And sent a word file to the box printers with an Apple logo

So help me, Apple fans.... Get your ez interface needin' asses in the game.

Destroyed the oval office With his gold wainscoting? Looks like shit

Onion > Cook

I've never witnessed so many men lose their manhood over an obviously inferior fellow human. They might as well castrate themselves in front of him; he might enjoy it. Meanwhile, don't tell me they are models for my grandsons.

Jobs would do same.

You can hear Tim C**k slurping on PornoPOtuS’ pork sword

Let Tim Cook. Finally found something even more embarrassing than dying by auto-erotic asphyxiation. It's a good thing Tim's in charge of selling scraps from Steve Job's crypt instead of hawking ShamWow's on tv at 3 a.m.

You almost can't hear Tim Cook clearly with that little dick in his mouth

Trump can’t even be bothered to know his actual name.

given apple's track record regarding the congo, i had a feeling tim apple was flaky as shit

Tim Apple.

So glad I own zero Apple products.