Tim Onion • Feed
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Tim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social

Mr. President, you are 100% correct. Cracker Barrel has the opportunity of a lifetime. It is time for the ultimate rebrand.

Cracker Barrel should go back to the old logo, admit a mistake based on customer response (the ultimate Poll), and manage the company better than ever before. They got a Billion Dollars worth of free publicity if they play their cards right. Very tricky to do, but a great opportunity. Have a major News Conference today. Make Cracker Barrel a WINNER again. Remember, in just a short period of time I made the United States of America the “HOTTEST” Country anywhere in the World. One year ago, it was “DEAD.” Good luck! @gayhooters Beer Entertainment Naps (wet naps after wings) Gay Hooters Airblade Zima It's all here
aug 26, 2025, 4:36 pm • 537 27

Replies

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Kari Johnson @karijohn.bsky.social

This shit is really becoming a national nightmare we cannot wake up from.

aug 26, 2025, 4:54 pm • 2 0 • view
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Pat Host @pathost.bsky.social

I hate this place

aug 26, 2025, 5:01 pm • 1 0 • view
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Annette Shaffer🇨🇦😷 @misskachoob.bsky.social

Guess he hasn't seen this list, or heard that Civicus added the United States to its watchlist for urgent concern over civic freedoms in its March 2025 and July 2025 reports.

Stats show Canada with the highest international reputation. Meanwhile the US makes the watch lists for human rights violations.
aug 26, 2025, 4:42 pm • 4 0 • view
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acrison.bsky.social @acrison.bsky.social

He meant hottest in terms of temperature

aug 26, 2025, 8:41 pm • 0 0 • view
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Sneaky T @tri-stan.bsky.social

Secret BENGHAZI?

aug 26, 2025, 5:01 pm • 1 0 • view
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Robert @spider76x.bsky.social

Must suck you guys can’t keep up with his insane shit.

aug 26, 2025, 4:43 pm • 0 0 • view
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KSK @dktrstrangelove.bsky.social

My takeaway: Always capitalize “Poll”

aug 26, 2025, 7:30 pm • 0 0 • view
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Lets @leticiandretta.bsky.social

Did he stop using ALL CAPS?

aug 26, 2025, 4:43 pm • 0 0 • view
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Lord of The Gays® @gaylord.pink

Somehow it seems like he's whispering because he stopped using all caps. Well done, Newsom.

aug 26, 2025, 4:42 pm • 1 0 • view
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adriana1o5.bsky.social @adriana1o5.bsky.social

I’ve got $20 on Trump never heard of Cracker Barrel before this or stepped foot in one in his life

aug 26, 2025, 4:41 pm • 7 0 • view
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Barack "Insane in the Hussein" Obama @thoughtbird.bsky.social

BRING THE CRACKER BACK TO CRACKER BARREL!!!

aug 26, 2025, 4:49 pm • 0 0 • view
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BigFigNewton2024 🇺🇦 @bigfignewton2024.bsky.social

Imagine the President of the United States having time to make social media posts about a company's logo. Or even thinking that they should weigh in on what a private business does with their logo. This country has gone batshit crazy.

aug 26, 2025, 6:41 pm • 1 0 • view
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A Horse of Course @charliehorsephotos.bsky.social

This whole thing reeks of a planned conservative meltdown cycle. CB: "We changed our logo." Fox: "YOU WENT WOKE!!111! Where's the hard R droppin' white dude?!" CB: "We're changing it back! 😉 New Coke crisis averted! Bring your whole clan y'all!"

aug 26, 2025, 8:03 pm • 0 0 • view
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Sarah Kelly @sarahkelly.bsky.social

Man I haven’t thought about Gay Hooters in ages

aug 26, 2025, 4:47 pm • 4 0 • view
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Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Max @2xaught7.ing

The hottest flapjacks at the hottest restaurant in the hottest country.

aug 26, 2025, 4:47 pm • 0 0 • view
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L @lahwrites.bsky.social

It is very far from the most salient issue here (that would be the horrors) but can you imagine this guy being your boss and he spews all this crap at you and is then like "so now go do that" jesus christ.

aug 26, 2025, 4:39 pm • 4 0 • view
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Generally Jenny @generally-jenny.bsky.social

Fuck off grandpa

aug 26, 2025, 4:37 pm • 1 0 • view
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Bill Fair @billfair.bsky.social

Trump always liked Cracker Barrel because it was a way better restaurant than his.

aug 26, 2025, 4:56 pm • 0 0 • view
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Diane @losarcos59.bsky.social

Please join indivisible.org today and shut his hole.

image image
aug 26, 2025, 4:37 pm • 4 0 • view
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Joe @jlaprade.bsky.social

E – Extra biscuits P – Pancake stack S – Syrup spill T – Turnip greens E – Endless tea I – Iced cornbread N – Nanner pudding

aug 26, 2025, 4:40 pm • 12 0 • view
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TakuroSpirit @takurospirit.bsky.social

The worst part of this is that I thought it had been at least a year since... dammit its only been a few months, eh? Fuck

aug 26, 2025, 4:48 pm • 0 0 • view
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Sandwich Brigade member @dangillotte.bsky.social

Of all the venal, terrible, horrible things Trump says his reference of the US as "HOT" is somehow the most objectionable to me.

aug 26, 2025, 4:41 pm • 8 0 • view
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Bill DiFilippo @billdifilippo.bsky.social

you ever wonder what the guys who wrote the book about the democratic cover up of biden getting old that everyone saw and was concerned about think when they see this stuff

aug 26, 2025, 4:39 pm • 35 0 • view
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Ryan Nanni @celebrityhottub.bsky.social

"look what the democrats and joe biden have normalized"

aug 26, 2025, 4:41 pm • 38 0 • view
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dallas @liketexas.bsky.social

The worst part of this becoming a culture war thing is that the new logo actually does suck but now the well is poisoned because it’s a right wing cause celebre.

aug 26, 2025, 4:44 pm • 0 0 • view
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Roxane @roxanefm.bsky.social

Funny how nobody wants to visit the "hottest country anywhere in the world" any more.

aug 26, 2025, 6:05 pm • 0 0 • view
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Ben Norris @bennorris.bsky.social

(the ultimate Poll),

aug 26, 2025, 4:38 pm • 0 0 • view
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karlkoons3 @karlkoons3.bsky.social

tRump's ridiculous statement about Cracker Barrel, a statement from the alleged President of the United States (some say he stole to election), proves that Cracker Barrel is doing the right thing and should double down Anything that triggers tRump is a good thing for America😀

aug 26, 2025, 4:52 pm • 0 0 • view
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Oedipal Arrangements 🇵🇸 @6to12elbow.bsky.social

I remember when presidents didn't talk about Cracker Barrel 🥀

aug 26, 2025, 4:39 pm • 3 0 • view
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Draven Umbra @dravenumbra.bsky.social

aug 26, 2025, 4:40 pm • 1 0 • view
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branan.bsky.social @branan.bsky.social

Maybe he will get the Government to buy a 10% share in the company.

aug 26, 2025, 5:07 pm • 0 0 • view
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Cindy Arnevik @cabbageridge.bsky.social

Sorry. My great grandchildren are under the assumption that it is a restaurant for old people thanks to their 40 year old parents. They aren’t wrong. They don’t care about old tools on the wall. And when they removed the eggs in a Nest they lost me despite having mimosas

aug 26, 2025, 4:43 pm • 1 0 • view
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foxfirefey @foxfirefey.bsky.social

I think it’s weird they’re making so much fuss about a brand that sounds like a slur used to describe a Trump rally

aug 26, 2025, 6:48 pm • 0 0 • view
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🌪️ Hot Coral Summer 🔥 @charltonlack.bsky.social

At last a Benghazi that isn't going away

aug 26, 2025, 4:38 pm • 1 0 • view
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jay-trotter.bsky.social @jay-trotter.bsky.social

Cracker Barrel Classic

aug 26, 2025, 6:25 pm • 0 0 • view
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Brian Ragle @ragle.bsky.social

Sardar Biglari is a Trump supporter.

aug 26, 2025, 6:01 pm • 0 0 • view
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DTL @dtl.bsky.social

The US should take a 10-15% stake in Cracker Barrel. For national security

aug 26, 2025, 4:49 pm • 3 0 • view
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Nate O @nateo.bsky.social

image
aug 26, 2025, 4:37 pm • 67 4 • view
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Chenoa @happyturtlewalker.bsky.social

🤣

aug 26, 2025, 4:42 pm • 1 0 • view