I don’t lend out books anymore, after a few times of getting them back with bent spines, dog eared pages, ripped dust covers, Cheeto dust fingerprints or not returned at all, no more lol. If there's a book I really think someone should read, I'll buy them a copy before they get mine.
It worked out. The first novel I gave him was Gravity’s Rainbow, and he felt bad about tearing it up, so he pieced it back together with packing tape on the spine. I winced but said: “Screw it. It’s not a collector’s item.”
That weekend I ran across a review copy, first printing, at a used bookstore, cheap. I bought the collector’s item. I still have both, but the one with the tape on the spine is more precious to me. He was the only one I could ever talk to about that novel.