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Ol' Simpkin

@simpkin.bsky.social

؜ .just a little guy

created June 22, 2023

402 followers 236 following 1,355 posts

view profile on Bluesky

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Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I don't know what this means, but I'm imagining Megatron being eaten by a Dune worm

2/9/2025, 9:01:11 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

drowning in ai slop on this rapidly deteriorating app but otherwise alright

2/9/2025, 8:59:29 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

goblin belly troll head

2/9/2025, 8:56:10 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I'm not getting my hopes up again after I got my heart broken when he survived Covid

2/9/2025, 7:43:28 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

ACAB excludes Harry Du Bois because he's only barely a cop.

2/9/2025, 2:45:30 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

The irony of wanting a con man under oath. Surely he'll cease his lying if his honor is at stake!

1/9/2025, 1:29:44 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Sounds like a recipe for a pants-shitting

1/9/2025, 1:25:29 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Red-blooded American here. They're right. You don't treat unhoused people like animals if you're pro-human rights. Newsom will gladly turn heel if he manages to slither his way into office. He is not our champion Oh, and AI art sucks. Its not exactly trolling to act exactly like the people you hate

1/9/2025, 1:21:50 PM | 18 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

teach me your ways soup witch

1/9/2025, 3:49:14 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

cute! I have so much trouble with hair, I have no idea why

1/9/2025, 2:57:25 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Do you like your lasagna wet or crunchy?

1/9/2025, 1:29:31 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

okay but like slap some beef bolognese and ricotta between two slices of toasted garlic bread and what's the difference really??

1/9/2025, 1:16:16 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

more like lapoopoo

1/9/2025, 1:10:12 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture 🎃No Comrades Left Alive🎃 (@spiralrings.blue) reposted reply parent

Oh boy another sex gymnasium. No, once again, I only came here to use the phone, sir.

31/8/2025, 11:19:00 PM | 6 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

is a grilled cheese sandwich lasagna

1/9/2025, 1:05:21 AM | 14 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

The people who clutch their pearls at this movie should be made to watch Mad God or Bestia to adjust their sense of "fucked up" because clearly they're a bit sheltered.

30/8/2025, 10:34:25 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Jordan (@slclunk.brighamyoungmoney.com) reposted

29/8/2025, 7:08:25 PM | 6637 1977 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Haha which volcano are you getting updates about...? 👀

30/8/2025, 4:16:15 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I stay stupid on purpose to preserve the magic in this world

28/8/2025, 11:25:03 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

shoutout to Digimon Frontier's english opening, as well

28/8/2025, 11:19:00 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Chaaaaaange In-To Digital Champions Toooooooooo Save the Digital [ W O R L D ]

28/8/2025, 11:15:32 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Jeremy Faust, MD (@jeremyfaust.bsky.social) reposted

Massive walkout underway at CDC. RFK jr. must resign so that we can be safe.

28/8/2025, 6:49:54 PM | 33565 7854 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

What if we got our best minds on cultivating glow-in-the-dark weed??

28/8/2025, 6:16:27 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

What if we had some kind of... nationwide pizza party? Surely that would boost morale and productivity??

28/8/2025, 6:13:32 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

sheesh, what did France ever do to you??

28/8/2025, 5:51:34 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture bites u (@bitesu.kawaii.social) reposted

I HATE MICROSOFT I HATE MICROSOFT I HATE MICROSOFT

27/8/2025, 2:06:02 AM | 703 100 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Zack Whittaker (@zackwhittaker.com) reposted

NEW: The Social Security Administration's chief data officer has blown the whistle, saying Trump's DOGE team uploaded a database containing the hundreds of millions of Social Security records of most Americans to an AWS cloud server, allegedly without proper access controls or monitoring in place.

26/8/2025, 5:36:52 PM | 524 280 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Punched in the turd hole

26/8/2025, 6:37:10 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I refuse to believe this creature has ever had a thought

26/8/2025, 6:31:47 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

i've never found chapstick, gum, or tampons in a taco but okay I guess

26/8/2025, 6:27:08 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I cool toddler.

26/8/2025, 6:24:32 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Somewhere between Forest Gump and Chris Farley

26/8/2025, 6:24:06 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I am an average human bean.

26/8/2025, 6:14:26 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Hareem Adbool Jbarr

26/8/2025, 6:09:50 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

this is a blatant ripoff of Bachelor Chow

26/8/2025, 6:08:14 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

ain't that that flying bugman from the Star Wars prequel??

26/8/2025, 6:06:48 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

At midnight, I gain the ability to eat my body weight in ice cream and have nightmares all night long. I'm expecting psychic powers to manifest from this routine any day now.

26/8/2025, 6:05:06 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Oh man, Darkness Falls!!! I still remember reading the book. Very gripping.

26/8/2025, 6:01:32 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Cabin Fever always leaves me with a deep feeling of dread. It's kind of corny by today's standards, but I watched Deep Rising when I was young and it made me scared to use a toilet for a couple days.

26/8/2025, 5:59:36 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Slutty Fucko, my beloved.

26/8/2025, 5:50:22 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I say this without the slightest hint of irony; The West has fallen.

26/8/2025, 5:49:44 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Bill Mudron (@mudron.bsky.social) reposted

image
25/8/2025, 12:01:50 AM | 3784 1312 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

You don't scare me. That gun doesn't even make sense.

26/8/2025, 5:46:06 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

Gonna start making up wild and potentially dangerous lies like "bears are afraid of techno"

26/8/2025, 5:44:49 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

25/8/2025, 2:10:28 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Animals wish *we* could talk.

25/8/2025, 12:40:12 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

can't go wrong with beef and cheese

24/8/2025, 11:07:06 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Bubsy in: Claws Encounters of the Furred Kind Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales Bubsy is 3D in: Furbitten Planet

24/8/2025, 12:19:57 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I don't know what his wife looks like but I feel like I have a very good idea

24/8/2025, 5:42:10 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

We're getting married, little do they know

23/8/2025, 9:49:10 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

This doesn't even sound good on paper, imo

23/8/2025, 1:27:15 AM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Peppy do a little steppy

21/8/2025, 8:41:48 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I think slop like this is astroturf by rich donos because if you're a poor person why tf would you be making crap like this? Judging by the sheer volume of this vacuous slop I've seen posted by accounts like this, I can only assume money has changed hands.

21/8/2025, 2:10:05 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

So you lot are all mad that time proved Susan Sarandon and Bernie supporters right?

Thumbnail from Secular Talk's YouTube video
21/8/2025, 8:31:06 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Human rights for all or human rights for none. You're hurting your own cause by defending this shit.

21/8/2025, 6:58:18 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

If whoever funds this account sees this, know that it only makes me hate the DNC more to know their fundraising dollars are being spent on slop like this.

21/8/2025, 6:53:53 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

that's one fuckin' nice kitty right there

21/8/2025, 6:34:13 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Moo Deng, my beloved

21/8/2025, 6:25:32 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

There are 32 comments on this post and they're all saying the same thing. Can you really not figure it out...?

21/8/2025, 6:18:51 AM | 39 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

fūd

image image image
21/8/2025, 5:57:58 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

"Sony Will Begin Scalping Its Own Merchandise After Today"

20/8/2025, 8:52:24 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

not sure if I should be proud or embarrassed that I "um, actually"d you by 12 seconds

20/8/2025, 8:48:50 PM | 15 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

bad analogy because steering into the iceberg might have stopped the ship from sinking

20/8/2025, 8:44:58 PM | 16 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Beer! Beer! Beer! Beer!

18/8/2025, 8:08:23 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Or bbq sauce. Or honey mustard.

18/8/2025, 6:34:51 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

When did this app become 90% bots??

17/8/2025, 1:45:13 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

alright, $15 is fine. not great, but fine.

16/8/2025, 8:34:00 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

$26.99

16/8/2025, 8:28:00 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

And I'm NOT just saying this because I'm similarly lummox-like!

16/8/2025, 11:14:50 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

My hot take is that liberals are too fixated on his appearance and should oppose him for the many many legitimate reasons to hate him

16/8/2025, 11:14:11 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Was it the one dressed up as Princess Peach?

14/8/2025, 8:22:32 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I'm allergic to sports

12/8/2025, 11:40:17 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

People pushing Pro-Genocide Pete are trying to handicap the party, you're absolutely correct

12/8/2025, 10:15:40 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

careful, he's fixin' to scurry

12/8/2025, 10:14:18 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

nostalgia flashbang

12/8/2025, 10:04:38 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

hero's death tbh

12/8/2025, 9:43:02 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

This should be a disqualifying statement. Anyone championing Pete to take up the mantle as the Democratic Presidential nominee is a saboteur.

12/8/2025, 7:26:35 AM | 4 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Small Gray Games (@smallgraygames.bsky.social) reposted

[NEWS HEADLINE]: "Experts Call Griffith's Latest Gambit a 'Distraction,' Question Leadership Qualifications" [ATTACHED PHOTO]:

The Eclipse from Berserk. Black and white, Boschian mess of demons at the foot of the towering hand, the members of the God Hand on its distant finger tips.
11/8/2025, 7:41:03 PM | 2 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

with he's friends

12/8/2025, 5:36:11 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

You absolutely need a typewriter. Break free from the tyranny of Microsoft Office

10/8/2025, 2:15:41 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

thank you for protecting his modesty

10/8/2025, 1:47:30 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

He got hit by a 0 damage attack with full knockback

9/8/2025, 10:43:13 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

the book kind of looks like a gun and now I'm thinking about tome-guns

9/8/2025, 9:16:56 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social)

Mahjong is confusing at first, and then makes less sense as you learn the rules.

9/8/2025, 10:04:23 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

they're calling him "The Best To Ever Do It"

6/8/2025, 5:37:00 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture garb (@papagarbage.bsky.social) reposted

getting a rib removed so i can more easily put on socks

5/8/2025, 11:11:15 PM | 20 3 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

"y-you!! STUPID!!! SHITTT!!!!!!"

5/8/2025, 5:41:18 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Nuclear power is basically just glorified steam power, right?? So my question is... what the fuck kind of moon water do they plan to use?????

5/8/2025, 12:10:41 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

???

image
4/8/2025, 8:08:43 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

is that Eddie???

image
4/8/2025, 6:20:15 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

why does this sound like a Chinese proverb

4/8/2025, 6:08:19 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

or a bigger guillotine

4/8/2025, 5:32:42 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

yo, same!! next time I move, I'll opt not to have my desk up against a window

4/8/2025, 1:02:31 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Would you have played it if you knew??

3/8/2025, 11:52:20 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Oh it is AGGRESSIVELY French. Unapologetically French.

3/8/2025, 11:48:26 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

Insane game to play around Christmas of all times

3/8/2025, 10:26:22 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I love when they show teefs

3/8/2025, 7:23:38 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ol' Simpkin (@simpkin.bsky.social) reply parent

I don't have a cat and I'm a piece of shit. Correlation or causation??

3/8/2025, 7:22:49 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view