Zoe, Parker, and Lolo’s mom. Urbanism enthusiast. Disability inclusion professional. Pathological people pleaser. Opinions my own. 🇧🇷
1,259 followers 392 following 860 posts
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Does anyone have a self tanner they love
Tommy needy drinky
Posting about her journey to leaving corporate America has amassed her a 50k+ following for saying “I quit corporate America” 6 ways to Sunday
A former friend’s ex girlfriend has become an “anti corporate deinfluencer” and it’s just being not like other girls on instagram
Why does Travis Kelce get to live my dream
The day before my wedding…am I…better than everyone else?
Fox News is currently running a segment saying the WNBA dildo throwing is soooo funny, but imagine if the ///CHILDREN/// were EXPOSED to SEX at any other sport?
Suddenly I have never seen him before and I am deeply offended he dared offer anything
Among my many toxic traits is the discomfort I telegraph to my fellow gym patrons whenever my dear fiancée gives me form feedback
D*vid protein is now selling cod fillets (4 6 oz fillets for $55, instructions only read: boil before consuming). It is rage bait and I’m falling for it.
If I get an LLBean boat and tote mini I blame @noraprinciotti.bsky.social
German car
Car maintenance: $5,000 and you will not feel a difference Bike maintenance: $90 and we will change your life
My apartment gym is shutting down literally from now until my wedding and I feel like suing
I should be the one apologizing
There is a fun, funny 1 hour 20 minute movie in this 2 hour monster unnecessarily featuring both of his daughters, who look identical, and we have to pretend aren’t related at all
Man I had faith in Happy Gilmore 2 for all of 5 minutes
I just watched King of Kong for the first time and I was hoping to find out Billy Mitchell was desperately alone and sad
AI is so good
Literally never speaking again. Shutting the fuck up forever.
Heading to final jeopardy
Just finished Jeopardy round. Scared for what you want me to see.
We’re watching Happy Gilmore no spoilers pls
Take on a longer lease and pay more! I say, making perfect logical sense for all parties involved
One of the more ridiculous things I’ve seen from a landlord in a while www.redfin.com/CA/Dublin/72...
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery
And frankly? It worked
Google search: How to unsend or edit RCS message
I am a democrat after all
See above
The most obnoxious people on earth
If you’re not paying attention to Jeopardy rn I would suggest you tap in because the current champ is on a 16-game $455k run
That’s right
Being an incredibly dense, majority Asian community makes Dubliners extremely vulnerable to ICE attacks and profiling. It also will lead to an increase in ICE activity in the Bay Area, putting our neighbors in extreme danger. We cannot allow this to happen.
The planned site is in Dublin, CA - a city that is 56% Asian, 11% Hispanic, and a major transit hub connecting to Central Valley and the Stockton metro area. It contains the end of the BART blue line and a drop off spot for shuttles from Stockton and other majority Latino Central Valley locations.
Please sign this petition against converting the federal corrections institution (known for having a r*pe club) as an ICE facility. We cannot allow them to open a detention center in the Bay Area. actionnetwork.org/petitions/d6...
Put on my fiancée’s glasses
For years, disabled passengers have complained about Amtrak and its poor service — that it's too hard for them to ride the train. A new federal report looks at its efforts to get better.
I rent all my clothes but honestly Abercrombie is goated rn
@johnsonator.bsky.social
Some of y’all should enroll in this class at my local community college bc you seem to do it for neither
Why be outside with your affair lol
lots of speculation about the obamas getting divorced but the thing you have to understand is that we need affordable housing
No protein, just fiber and carbs. Suffer 🤗
The violence I experience as a non-meat eating person at any conference
😭😭
“California is so far using forty per cent less natural gas to generate electricity than it did in 2023, which is the single most hopeful statistic I’ve seen in four decades of writing about the climate crisis.” www.newyorker.com/news/annals-...
Girl dinner (Botox appointment, Caesar salad, bottle of sparkling rosé, all with my mom)
hey every single journalist who still uses twitter as your primary site, does the fact that the chatbot is promoting the Final Solution rise to the level of a news story or no stop making this the global hub for news communication
Real theater heads will appreciate the abject horror of this experience
Planning my wedding music on the train and my computer just screamed the “MY MOTHER ON A DIET” line from “Without Love” from Hairspray to all my fellow passengers
I pledge my blood to the Dark Lord Oski, dread sovereign of college football
Who do we think we have here
He tried to say it was because the girls would consider me a threat and try to get rid of me and I’m like sure Jan
Conner just turned to me while we were watching Love Island and said “I think you’d get voted off quick”
Literally my whole feed at this point is weddings, bachelorettes, and vacation
Feed posts are for discombobulated monthly dumps and tax filing status changes ONLY 😤😤😤
The people at this wedding I am stalking via instagram are not posting enough.
blasting this from my patio bc my pool was full
Can we increase the extensions budget for Ariana #loveisland
Why did no one tell me about the television program spin city
tfw you've just stripped healthcare from 17 million Americans and ensured the closure of rural hospitals
Turns out he transposed the Miss Universe error onto this
Conner had replaced Warren Beaty in his mind and was doggedly convinced that Steve Harvey messed up the La La Land / Moonlight Best Picture
An email my parents got from my sister’s high school district. The harm these cuts are causing and will continue to cause to all families is immeasurable.
That person has left and a new person is now having a full blown phone call while doing squats. If you can take a call during squats you need to increase weight!!!!!
This is bad security practice and generally not cool!
Someone is on a company call ON SPEAKER doing curls in the apartment gym
California is the fourth-largest economy, the most diverse state in the most diverse democracy, and a leader in technology and innovation BECAUSE of immigrants. Immigrants are what make our state great and they are what make this country great.
Me on bluesky as a non New Yorker rn
![A photo originally captioned “I stopped by one of my biggest hater’s funerals today just to make sure that [man] was dead”](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:el5a4jiffygj4z4gaamf4hmu/bafkreicjiwbonms7rtz4wcmvyudjvlvaeb7mgmnug75bxodda5djd46gjy@jpeg "Click to view full size")
MAAAAAAMDAAAANIIIIIIIIIIII
AND MAY IT NEVER BE YOUR NIGHT YOU UNREPENTING CREEP
Zos
Look not to be a holistic girlie or anything but these literally taste exactly like a Hostess Zinger
Getting roasted on r/stamps for calling a 1999 stamp “vintage”
You gotta make it to 1:07 you simply have to power through
I’m keeping a playlist of every song my 16 y/o sister posts to her instagram story and I hope she doesn’t hate me when I share it with her when she graduates high school
@gavinnewsom.bsky.social answer my subpoena
Happy Father’s Day!!
For the amount of promo I’m seeing Materialists must not be selling many tickets
No Kings except
Uh, whose fault is this?
the allegations of bluesky being an echo chamber are false. all sixteen eras of taylor swift are evenly represented
A girl can have a little fun
Hey if anyone in DC is looking for work this weekend check this out washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/tlg/d/wa...
Been on!!!!!
No they’re not
Mike I’ve had the internet equivalent of two beers and I need them
I sincerely would love to know where these people think all the money is for this stuff
Zohran YIMBY arc let’s gooooo
I remember that too!
congratulations assholes, you’ve bullied Gavin into getting off his right wing podcast circuit and back to pretending to care about his constituents again that’s a hell of a fuckup on your part
L.A. is a Mexican-American city. The majority of the population is made up of racial and ethnic minorities. We are all happy living together and really do not want to see our friends, neighbors and families being terrorized by federal robo-cops. This is bullshit.
We’re eco friendly :)))) and we burn tons of CO2 to generate slop for our own self interest
The last photo in the Airbnb listing, the one of the rules of the Airbnb you have to agree to separately (this is only a short excerpt), the host of the Airbnb
Today was so satisfying as someone whose first high school boyfriend is now a rocket scientist at SpaceX (he broke up with me over the phone)
Need Alaska to switch up the boarding music bc I can’t be hearing Shrike by Hozier every time I board a flight. It is too emotionally potent.
