the second the ink dried on my insurance card I was out the door, lol
the second the ink dried on my insurance card I was out the door, lol
I have had health insurance for a grand total of 3 days and I am already in the ER, hell yeah
wait until I tell you about the pet hospital that takes ownership of your pet and leases it back to you to “cut down on veterinary bills”
Hilarious that they offered Adams a position at the US Department of the only thing they hire black people for
if i need to engage in an ultrawide handheld experience i will call your mom
how do right wingers reconcile their irrational fear of declining birth rates with their irrational fear of vaccines 🤔
I have to remember to breathe? On top of everything else? Freaking basic life skill issue failure
just came to the awful realization that when focusing on a task I will just stop breathing for like over a minute
as goofy as it seems I do believe laura loomer is our own modern day rasputin
lol got’em
if you are a 40 year old man complaining about being “bullied” on a social media platform, I have great news for you: you are allowed to log off
well at least you’re not even a tad self important
Well that rules out Noah Berlatsky
Have the people that claim Bluesky is a haven for harassment and infighting tried being less obnoxious, I bet that would work
the most charisma-less man I’ve ever seen
Saw a video of him the other night trying to be a bike Portland guy in which he admitted he never bikes and was visibly scared of people walking around doing normal stuff
Lowest bar imaginable
as mayor of Portland I will make every public cemetery also a fun putt putt mini golf course
at least we should allow disc golf in cemeteries
think about all the land use problems we could solve if we allowed golfing in cemeteries
Can’t stop thinking about my neighbor’s garage door
genuinely saw a liberal talking about newsom as doing some things wrong (anti-homeless policies) but some things right (trolling trump on the internet) and i really wonder about the worth of that second thing, there. is that doing anything at all
If they would just use services we deny them access to then we would provide them those services, is a hell of a take
this site is bad! it's going to fail! its user base has plateaued! it's not making any money! nobody here is smart except for me! everybody here is stupid! nobody is having any good discussions! i don't like being here! ok that's it for now. be back in 90 minutes
In honor of Skynet's birthday, here's the Terminator 2 teaser trailer with the music from Sesame Street's Making Crayons short
mark cuban isn’t even cuban but he’s definitely a gusano
if you eat the radioactive shrimp you can become shrimp man and your special power is slinging a stream of feces out of your digestive tract to subdue your foes
everybody have a great labor day weekend and remember: no war but class war
my brain alternately reads it as “news cum” or “new scum” and I guess the later isn’t as accurate
hate to hand it to him but trump was kinda cooking when he came up with “gavin newscum”
Slicing into a clevery-disguised cake made to look like a coffee pot The pot yells in pain You look closer, discovering in horror that you've inadvertantly cut method actor Daniel Day-Lewis
In America we have city cops, different cops for your county, cops for the whole state, cops for soldiers, cops for malls, presidential cops, cops for the stock market, mail cops, federal cops, cops we secretly send to other countries. Even your neighbors get to pretend to be cops. We’re very safe
my name is gavin newsom and I’m here to say I’ve got a dope meme coin on the way donald trump is poo poo I got 48 labubus You’ll never get rid of me I’m just too skibidi
people on this website want to throw trans rights under the bus for this clown, omg
stupid podcast host even stupider governor
who’s doing the disenfranchising kevin hmmm
Bluesky needs a shame labeler for people that paid for a checkmark on the other website
Since you’re not getting paid here why don’t you fuck off
Check this shit out motherfucker *embargoes own country*
Lmao
- person struggling with suicidal ideation turns to chatGPT for “therapy” - chatGPT provides detailed guidance on how to fasten a noose, then alerts police - police execute a “wellness check” then murder the person because that’s the only thing police are good at
if the national guard can’t look over my grammar than this is a huge waste of tax dollars
in east county, where we live, people were posting “thunder with no rain? isn’t that impossible?”
thanks to the national guard keeps our streets safe, kids doing sick wheelies are down 2%
MMMMM BOOT TASTE GOOD
remember folks, we cant have gun restrictions because if we do the federal government will occupy our streets, imprison people without due process, ship dissidents to foreign gulags and things of that nature
We are a collection of rugged individualists but also sky makes noise? How to fill gas tank without exploding?
Portland is cool because it thunders so infrequently that people here forget it even *exists*
Hi authors! Please remember to file a claim!
Keith Edward’s calling anything “predatory” is rich considering he actively ran cover for a sex predator at the Lincoln project, lmao
yeah that’s the problem with state/local police they’re underfunded, lmaoooo
Teaching Civics right now must be wild, like "Congress used to pass laws but now they just kinda seem to be publicly jerking off in our faces"
the fbi did bad stuff before I joined and they started doing bad stuff after I left but it was chill when I was there
Your account should be suppressed it’s nothing but AI slop
every time I see “third way” on here it takes a sec to realize it’s not a reference to butt stuff
You may not like that it takes 100 years to pass some watered down social welfare program because of the constitution but that's also what protects us from dictatorship [some dumb slob does dictatorship in 6 months]
This is how I do it, and it works
that’s like 15% chest max
I don’t think you’re really using you’re whole chest you need to put more chest into it
the longer our son takes to nod off the longer that song gets. “The air brakes on the bus go pfff pfff pfff” etc.
it’s unfortunate but it’s “the app on your phone goes, tap to pay, tap to pay”
ma’am you need to settle down
Now I’m only failing a fart
You’re not looking so good you need to take tomorrow off
It rules so hard. I love that movie. Missed my chance to see it in imax, but I did see it in theater.
I would never compare my marriage to the dem party simply because I actually love my wife
lmao
You should also be able to try out any other priced home
My husband saw a post on Craigslist calling a chop saw a radial arm saw and he's still ranting about the difference and the types of saws 30 minutes later
Homelander irl would still be a more talented actor
why is your head so fucking fat
I don’t know the backstory here but this is pretty cool
get your goofy ass copy pasta out of here
lmao
thank you bill for being the lone hold out and keeping your integrity
I like ur cornrows
I like ur cornrows
now that cracker barrel is woke i will admit their hash brown casserole is pretty fucking good
every other week a new article regurgitating the same argument for staying on twitter gets pumped out like it’s original content, lmao
Those wokes are always throwing around disgusting terms like “stakeholders”
what’s to argue
the argument > 13 songs
plenty to hate on here but personally, you do not get to name your shitstack the same name as fugazi’s best album
Gothaaam citaaayyyy
Replace “GPT” with any mainstream horror franchise here to see how stupid this sounds
i’m gonna setup a shopify store for a product called “AI supplements” and not explain what they do but they will cost $90/bottle
the thing about AI evangelists is that they are all shameless and will seamlessly transition into hawking the next juicero or whatever
Autocorrect always changing Mayo to Maybe
Problem being they are just using my number to sign up for shit, I can’t spoof theirs
Cuomo is also a trump supporting right winger so that tracks
I’m gonna find whoever authored this and dunk them in the toilet
that’s co-deputy *to* the director