he’s gonna apologize for jan 6
here lies fatty pinner
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he’s gonna apologize for jan 6
??
high five
yeah either is fine, as long as you also have tiny shards of bowl mixed into it
follow for more recipes
the groove is stored in the butt
😥 oh no
that’s not the translation lol
the Cat YouTube channel has become my go to for actual video evidence of the atrocities perpetrated upon cats by mice & birds
me and a buddy had cheeseburgers last night and he said “cheeseburger in paradise” and i said “what’s that, a fuckin Jimmy Buffet song?? 😂 “ and he said “yes actually”
For sale: Presidential diapers, never worn
*mist it (i shoot a cloud of vapor btw)
where’s the lie.
yeah! it’s the story of how the takeover happened. imo not quite as fantastic as the trilogy but still worth finding
they’re super good! i had the deeply satisfying experience of reading them to my son, then when he could read he read them a bunch of times too
John Christopher is the author. there’s a prequel book too, so four in total
the tripods trilogy. follows a young teenage boy in a post-apocalypse where aliens have taken over the earth and put mind control caps on all the adults. the boy has to first travel to join a resistance group, then he infiltrates an alien city, they mount a desperate last stand etc
oh i will
man i read the FUCK out of those books as a kid
fuck i forgot the illustrated diagram part. fuck
>looking for a new enhancement of the Trump photo >ask Christopher Webb if he used decades of experience to enhance the image or if he used AI >he laughs and says “it’s a good enhancement sir” >look at the enhancement >its AI
just saw someone call him “DementiaConOld” get it? ConOld? DO YOU GET IT
i’m saying it is incorrect 👍
“i enhanced the image” “i cast a wizard spell”
my followers? funny and smart your followers? stink like a fart my followers? the best in the business your followers? came down with a sickness
my followers? funny and smart your followers? stink like a fart my followers? the best in the business your followers? came down with a sickness
imagine a phone case with live grass growing on it
ah, the unassailable Monty Python Defense
“smooth and a half”
i love sandwiching a filling
okay but now picture Alan Rickman saying it
you have my permission to throw me to the zombies if it comes down to that
man literally what use would i be in a zombie apocalypse? find some warlord to play guitar for? i have no other skills. just feed me to the zombies. this would also have the effect of slightly lowering the overall dangerousness of the zombie horde, since i would also be a pretty flimsy zombie
[twirling my hair] so is there a Queen Arthur?
having a rehearsal in my buddy’s new studio. it’s called Shabby Road
i’m the hat man but like, a pleasant version
i’m not eating the poop, but i am also pooping in your yard and my poop also disappears by morning
you should buy a manual transmission car and THEN learn how to drive it 👍
ha ha what a hoot!
osama’s been laughin
follow your heart ✨
seems like as good a time as any for you to watch my spec ad for tacobell www.bbc.com/news/article...
sounds like you’re rolling 😎 a fatty pinner
for real
okay, so you get good gas mileage
that car is all i aspire to
yeah well i guess you’re not a true coffee guy
dude are you having a stroke
lol “communism sucks and my proof is this sensible car” dude it’s too early in the morning for this
the squirrels scold me from the walnut tree. they chide me. they disparage and mock me. they make lewd comments about my female relatives
gn
i was right. that was delightful
(please don’t tell anyone that my avatar photo is 8 years old)
in all seriousness that would be extremely delightful
yeah that’s fair
im an elder, but not in a mormon sense. in a bluesky sense
all women on earth: yall need to get your eyes checked. men too. and NBs
i love when the hint contains the entire answer
im extremely handsome in a way that nobody ever seems to really get
you know you guys are allowed to each have your own bluesky account
i don’t even wanna know what THAT stands for
is that David Marble Madness?
alright so it seems like skip is a racist bully then. i think it’s official
post
whoa
it does kinda contain a racial slur though. not sure if this makes you or skip more problematic
just tell me one of them. whisper it
If you wait long enough to cook dinner, everyone will eat cereal. Follow me for more recipes.
which ones?
some people get all the luck
i don’t think skip should bully you. SKIP STOP BULLYING THE ELDERLY
🫂
my cat has a UTI
Ah no, we also have "Das Mitochondrium ist das Kraftwerk der Zelle" in German😂
how am i supposed to keep merrily rowing my boat down the stream, gently no less, when you keep saying spooky bull shit like Life Is But A Dream.. cause now it's like, fuckin.... can anyone row anything... is there anything to row.. is there anything?? whole day's dicked now, nice one. cool song
kneel mcauley
No more outsourcing from abroad—the US will now cultivate its own tired, poor, huddled masses yearning to breathe free domestically.
oh ok that’s a whole category of type of person i didn’t know about
wanna start playing minecraft again just so i can name a sword this
okay but consider this: a lot of those scientists & researchers are probably on the spectrum so
lol shut up. what is this nonsense. do something better with your time
get a paper cut
eat my poop
suck my balls
DON’T
Old Soviet joke for today: A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves. After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?” “I’m looking for the obituaries.” “The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.” “Not the one I’m looking for.”
yeah i mean ideally he would be rotting in a cell
first day i showed up, there was a pamphlet about it in my welcome package
the world would be a little bit better because Trump would be dead
im the pearls right?
can’t fire yourself if you quit first
nah man they do tell us that, explicitly
guy who wants live music for a party he’s throwing on his property, shopping around trying to find the cheapest band, lying about how much x band said they’d charge to try convincing y band they should do it for less… what you fail to realize, my friend, is that I’M IN ALL THE BANDS
this guy keeps on being accidentally based lol
correct
Chaxley “Toenails” Prundt
