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Keep on throwin that ho, coach
Hey, maybe this means Pete is fixed too and…oh
man i just did this and it's beautiful
which in turn has us remembering Nick Esasky
Hey….maybe Cam Smith will turn out to be bad! That’d be all right, huh?
Happ 100 percent would’ve fucked that ball up. GIVE CASSIE THE GOLD GLOVE
He’s gotta be hurt, right?
HELL yes
My man drinking out of a damn rivalry trophy.
I can smell that picture and it’s delightful
(JFK pronouncing Arizona)
Because the pen was planning on throwing batting practice today
Same for “I’m not the boss of the customers. I’m the boss of you. And I’m telling you to leave that Shit…KICKER hat…at home”
🎶Immmmm the beeeeeeear on the TRAMP
Seiya has now reached the always fun “man, I hope he strikes out so he doesn’t hit into a double play” stretch of things
If you would really like to add onto that nostalgia vibe, go to the game day tracker and look at just how many middle middle pitches, cub hitters are not doing anything with.
SCROOGE (Walton Goggins) (VO): It had been seven years Old Marley had been dead. Unless this is known, nothing fantastic can be understood MARLEY (Danny McBride) flings open BEDROOM DOOR: Hey Scrooge what's up you sassy son of a bitch. Who decorated this place Jack the Ripper
“That suuucks, man”
/host introducing the musical guest for their second song on SNL voice
I see you, King
It must feel amazing to launch a dinger out of Truist Park. Sending a rocket through the front window of a 300-seat Bonefish Grill in the adjacent mall, all the Vineyard Vines dudes in there are so scared at the sound that they instantly jump into their Sorcerer-size SUVs and drive 55 minutes home.
One other good plot is James caan and Craig Schaefer winning a conference title with 3 losses
HOLY SHIT
Watching movies in which heroes stand up for the little guy, do the unpopular brave thing simply because it is right, help those in need, are kind to people different from them, and grinding my teeth in frenzied rage at this political bias that is personally attacking me, a massive piece of shit.
(Jim Rome voice) that’s not funny NORM IN MINNEAPOLIS
“You owe me 15 grand, pal”
Dune it to me one more time
Patrick you’re familiar with the real life Joe Jamail “you ain’t runnin this deposition, big boy” clip, yes?
10.0
General Cornwallis’ “doing great Mike, how are you” is a Phillip Seymour Hoffman level line read
I have told family members that this is not the time to be a hero. It is time to get them clothes or a Sandra Boynton book.
I've been thinking a lot about the difference between doing a "search" and doing "research" and how that works with conspiracy theory/lies to control our public sphere. Here's an old thread from 2023
This is perhaps my favorite one of these you have ever done
That was the one we were all hype and Dick Mountain gave up the lead off homer, yes?
Tyrese Haliburton is really good, and I can see how what I am about to write could read as critical, but there are some subtle but noticeable Jar-Jar Binks Notes to his style that make him extra interesting to watch. He's about as silly-seeming as a player this good can be.
That was one of the worst sends I’ve ever fucking seen
45 minutes into an hour-long sensory deprivation float session. My brain: “Was Samuel Dalembert ever on the Kings?”
Idk man but when the administration that tried to reject humanitarian aid for Los Angeles when it was burning tries to justify their illegal military occupation by saying they aren’t going to let LA burn it kinda sounds like bullshit
Island of Dr Moreau -ass sandwich
Spencer I’ve watched this clip conservatively 45 times this morning
If you hear “like a force of nature” and get choked up, you and I can hang
You can’t talk to me like that Bobby I don’t care who you are You don’t wanna hang your own drywall? Don’t push me too far
The next hit that guy gets with runners and scoring position is gonna be the first one
I see you, king
“It’s a beautiful day out - what do you wanna do” “I wanna watch Colin rea miss armside and see Justin turner run into one”
Don’t bother ringing it up!
Sophie B Hawkins, playing immaculate grid and getting a 25% rarity for Cleveland - giants player 🎶Damn. I wish I’d used Brett Butler🎶
MUST BE NICE
@clueheywood.bsky.social - man this diamondbacks bullpen. Are you still watching this stuff nightly?
Take THAT, Guernica
HELL yes. Man you throw in as many the critic references as you can, king. I see you
Yo but is he The Pope tho? Prob not
Holding antiquated long sharp weapons with an uzi slung over shoulder in that fit is a damn BAR
lol I was looking at hits. Surely THIS washed astros closer will work this year, right Jed?
Better than the 8 he ultimately gave up
I’m sure once they get that fluid out of his knee everything will be right as rain
A real man Would sooner DRIVE DRUNK than stoop to this level
Many, MANY children’s books include a character that sounds like Michael Caine and also a character that sounds like Dennis Mello on the Wire
Man, hell yeah
Now wait a damn minute here
A piece of Steve Trachel art like those billboards that change images as you drive past, but it goes into his delivery ever 95 seconds
DROP THE PUCK (drum fill)
“spam in a can”
It almost feels like Counsell saying fuck you to Jed every time he’s in the game
Running over a bunch of fuckin sticks and rocks with the lawnmower and just letting that shit pelt the shit out of my legs. Fuck you and fuck me
You figure out REAL quick where things like Taco Tuesday came from.
This is watching Max Scherzer try to work out a 6th plus-plus pitch. It’s an honor to just watch a master at the craft.
kind of like watching your car go up in flames on the side of the highway. undeniably mesmerizing, but also it's your car
Edward Gorey reference has me going Def Jam audience member
Put a fresh one in between your lips and a beer between your legs, amigo
“WHERE DO WE GET THESE PLACEBOS?!?!!”
I feel like he could have Yu Darvish “I love this guy, notwithstanding the fact that this garbage family franchise fucked him over” status
Ryan Pace likes where this bullpen is to start the year. Almost too many options, he says
“This guy throws 98! How come no one else picked up on him?” ( hitter fouls off 4 straight fastballs, walks on slider that bounces 7 feet before plate) “Oh”
He is such a little shit out there. Love it
The CPD guys are the Chicago equivalent of the diamond district guys in Uncut Gems. Just the platonic ideal of the form
This Richard Kimball? must be some kind of lad
AOC speaks for me.
Not to harp on this concept again, but the way a protection racket works is, once you pay once -- just once -- the mob owns your ass for life. Of course you will have a change of mind later. It won't matter.
You know, I thought I was done giving money to Democrats. But I’m going to happily donate to whoever primaries these feckless, weak motherfuckers
Kid…..
This one went off after it hit the ground but man, nailed it
Wot? You don’t think oive got the minerals?!?!
Yes/King crimson and toad the wet sprocket tribute band Prog and Toad
Absolutely mind boggling concept with just flawless execution
I am ordering all of my opinion-writing employees to only write about the importance of personal liberty, if they don't want to write on the assigned topic, they will lose their jobs
I see you, king
Every American non-asshole hockey fan I know is pulling for you guys as a result. This guy fucking ruins everything.
This whole saga has, I think, demonstrated very well my contention that American political journalists believe that they deserve all of the respect and deference that comes with filling a vital societal role, while rejecting the idea that holding such a position also entails duties and obligations.
Goddammit that’s good
Lol I was at that game and I’ve never been more sure of something happening before it did
It is the greatest 12:50 o sketch of all time
I am Spartacus style queue of suitors
It’s almost as if there was a famous psychological experiment demonstrating this very principle that everyone seems to have forgotten
