I’m really trying to learn where the line is in terms of paying attention because I can actually help with something, and paying attention because I feel guilty about looking away, but there’s actually nothing I can do, so I just end up feeling anxious and helpless.
Sharing this because I think it’s important to talk about. I feel like I can’t be the only one feeling this way, and so maybe it’ll help someone else feel ok about drawing that line too.
I’ve been limiting myself from all the madness of everything (especially social media) the past week because the anxiety of having a wildfire 3 km from my house is ENOUGH. I think breaks and self-care are completely OK.
Oh Angela, I didn’t know you were so close! I hope you’re holding up okay! I’m close to where the Tantallon fire was, and it was awful. Sending hugs.
I have absolutely curated my follows and my mutes - it feels like a whiny, privileged position to be in to choose when to look away, but there’s some stuff I can’t influence and that’s just going to drive me crazy. I’m getting (a little) better at accepting that there are things I can’t control.
I genuinely think it’s okay to decide that for you, social media is for conversation and not for activism. I don’t think that’s anything we need to apologize for.
For me, it’s helped to realized that if I overwhelm myself with things I can’t control, I’ll be too mentally burnt out to help in areas where I CAN make a difference. It’s about conserving energy so I can still be effective, I guess.
My dad set a really good example for identifying limits. He set boundaries for himself around media about certain topics when he already understood the complete horror of the situation. He knew that it would be debilitating to constantly expose himself to the trauma. I try to do the same.
I’ve come to understand that my nervous system is highly disregulated by certain triggers, and while some of them will jump out at me, if I can choose to avoid repeat exposure to known injustice and selfishness and cruelty that I can’t affect - that conserves my energy. I know this - now to live it.
I’ve muted a few folks recently. And ignored a bunch of new followers who feed is predominantly the same horrors I’m muting. It’s too much.
That’s it for me. It’s just the sheer volume of it. We’re not meant to absorb all this at once, all the time.