Can you imagine the arraignment judge? "The suspect committed assault with a what now?"

🤣🤣🤣

Prosecutor looks away, lowers voice: “a SOFT roll, your honor”

Your Honor, my client is INNOCENT and was enthusiastically participating in the free subs for facists giveaway program.

Hot or sweet peppers? Both your honor.

Comedic gold!

a projectile sandwich is no more lethal than a dildo flung at a wnba game, but watch clay travis demand life imprisonment for the former & inclusion on the presidents council on physical fitness for the latter.

If the bread was fresh, was it assault or bologna with no salt.

judges are extremely childish and petty you can’t ever assume they’ll be the voice of reason

$5 foot-long resistance!

against me!: reinventing axl rose. pink polo bro: reinventing jared fogle.

There’s a Pink Polo Bro parody version of Pink Pony Club out there just waiting to be written by someone creative!

if only the capitol steps weren't rtghtwing shitheads who conveniently decided to hang it up on the occasion of donold's first win.

🎵Pink Polo Sub🎵

Even better 🤣

I’ve seen several verses & versions of the chorus circulating already.

I can think of at least 3 MLB teams who need to call this motherfucker.

@freedcproject.bsky.social Protest idea: people buy subs and give them to Fed officers in honor of Sandwich Bro, aka Hoagie-won Kenobi (used bite-Sabre vs. Stormtrooper — saw this in another skeet).

somebody please catch them on video flinching, then sloooowly and timidly reaching for the sandwich...

Exactly!😀

“give” them at high velocity.

Ah but cans of soup are so much cheaper

No. Cans of soup can be seen as dangerous so might get you shot. A sub can disarm Fed, physically and emotionally.

What about cup noodle.

Wait i thought you were joking when you proposed subsidizing the gestapos food budget

Partially. But, part of the reason large scale peaceful protests work is that the some government enforcers refuse to enforce orders or put down protests. Giving a sub undermines the Feds because then they owe you something.

He took on the Stormtroopers with his bite-sabre. Henceforth, he shall be known as hoagie-won-kenobi.

🤣🤣🤣

should it be “his bite-sbarro” ?

Runners need their carbs! Really he was trying to help.

Surprised they could catch up, he has a runner's build

"“If you touch any law enforcement officer, we will come after you,” Bondi wrote. “I just learned that this defendant worked at the Department of Justice — NO LONGER. Not only is he FIRED, he has been charged with a felony.” - January 6th would like to have a word.

Meanwhile: DC’s college bros are making thousands of subs this morning to be deployed through the day.

That is, deployed to food banks and mutual aid networks.

If anyone asks, it's "Subs, for my family."

Hoagies are also acceptable resistant tools.

You can’t throw a brick, it’s too heavy. But a Subway sandwich, you can really put some power into that, right?

I know my brain is poisoned because I understood this reference

Excellent use of subs!

This thing copyrighted?

no tbh it’s just AI slop but for a good cause

Ew

New subway spokesperson "Eat Fresh and punch a fascist"

I just offered the fascists a meal, a succulent subway sandwich meal!

Footlong did nothing wrong! *Clap clap clapclapclap*

legit lol

Did you make this? Would love to know who did!

Yeah but I used ChatGPT because I have no artistic skills

Not gonna bust on you for it. You made a cool thing even if you use AI. And respect that you just say it

We have to take the tools of the oligarchy and use them to fight back

I make slap stickers that I also give away for free. Do you mind if I incorporate this into one of them?

Not at all

youtu.be/bWcASV2sey0?...

Jim Malone: You wanna know how to take over DC? They throw a sandwich, you throw a panini . They throw a thin crust slice, you throw a 16” deep dish. That's the Chicago way!

Bravo!

You know what goes good with a sandwich? A giant can of hot soup, served as quickly as possible.

Are you the artist?

Sort of. I used ChatGPT because I have ideas but no artistic abilities.

What a gyro!

The Guardian (2025) – Trump is spreading false narratives about crime in D.C., just as he did with Los Angeles, using fear as a political weapon instead of addressing real issues.

‪@briansantacruz.bsky.social‬ is this your original art? We had some folks asking us to make some stickers of this and we wanted to find the original artist to see about getting permission/licensing/donating the proceeds or something like that.

Yes i created it. I’m ok with granting a non-exclusive license to make stickers if you donate all of the net proceeds to Planned Parenthood. Feel free to DM me.

DM inbound!

"It has to start somewhere, it has to start sometime, what better place than here, what better time than now"

T-shirts when?

The “Earl of Sandwich” . A hero among common people. A threat to MAGA fascists.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=-v5d...

This guy need to be booked on Jimmy Kimmel immediately.

Good thing it wasn’t something bigger and harder… like a baguette 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

This stupid assault charge is as ridiculous as the little child running the USA

The Hero we need right now

Literally and figuratively.

The *gyro we need

nice

Not all heroes wear capes!

But villains wear mustard! And pickles, and ham and turkey and cheese and…

👏💪✊👑

Did it have double meat? Could show intent.