My brain just asked me to consider if I'd pick up a gun in defense of the great state of Maryland, so that's my cue to go do a drug or two

Would you do it out of spite, though?

I am absolutely stupid enough to do it out of spite, yes

I try really hard to not let that part of my brain drive, but she gets rowdy sometimes

On one hand, I don't ever want to hear from the part of my brain that thinks the military is okay. We did it your way and it fucking sucked now shut the fuck up. On the other hand, it's nauseating to think "what if my state needed defending from my country"