just had the most cursed beer i've ever had in my life it tasted like fucking goddamned hair conditioner, there was sediment at the bottom of the can coconut should not be an ingredient in beer and people keep making coconut an ingredient in beer and it should be Illegal Food Crimes to do that
there are federal laws ag– …oh, right, you're on your own
coconut is the Devil's Nut and I cannot abide it in any form
(this last statement is a joke, i expressly do not believe food crimes can be real. but oh my god people keep making coconut beer and it's. why. why. i guess this is what i get for unironically enjoying IPAs)
I had a Southern Tier beer based on Samoa girl scout cookies, but that's the only good coconut beer in the world
huh I'm kind of surprised I haven't run into that yet. I haven't had a Southern Tier I didn't enjoy, and they've pulled off some absolutely wild nonsense
They also had another girl scout cookie one called Thick Mint that was *legit*
I HAVE HAD THAT. it was INCREDIBLE lol. I did not expect it to work, at all, and it somehow did
I have never heard of coconut beer and now I am intrigued
this beer actually breaks the threshold of "this was a fascinating experience and I do not regret having it" in the end accounting, I'm not sure it's *successful* at what it's trying to do but it's making a very bold statement, as opposed to JUST smelling like sunscreen
side note that this entire excursion has been an exercise in why when my first reaction to something is "WOW THAT'S CURSED???" i always go back to it to try more to see if the flavor evolves. there is a dimensionality of malflavour beyond cursédness inhabited by CPU thermal paste and bad sea urchin
but everything that does not descend to such abyssal depths -usually has something interesting going on worth exploring-; if it's just mundanely bad it'll be more BORING than anything else and I'll just set it down, it's like a reverse uncanny valley effect
a cocktail i deeply love is one where, every time i have the first sip of it i am like "this is poison, and i am going to die", and then the second sip is "brother why did you take a second sip of poison?", then the third is "...huh" and after that it's delicious this happens EVERY TIME
Data: "I hate this. It is revolting." Guinan: "More?" Data: "Please!"
lmaoooooo yes continued adventures of Data being the character I vibe with the most I guess
bro me too, I'm so glad to hear someone else does this so I'm not crazy by myself
hell yeah hell yeah
i have an interesting relationship with flavour
This is legitimately fascinating to me as I have anosmia (not covid-related), so my relationship with flavors, if I manage to have one at all, is like big primary color splotches instead of intricate details that can change over time
i think genuinely all of my ability to perceive fine detail went into wringing as much out of the senses of smell and touch as the human body in its artless and undignified limited fashion will permit me
my brain was like "well the eyes suck and the ears may as well not be there. what do we have on the ship that's GOOD" and in another life i'm designing perfumes about it or something, a thing i actually really wanted to do as a kid, & i made perfumes for family members for a while, I was good at it
And apparently British spelling.
somehow I picked up British spellings for words around the same time I drowned my natural accent in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean (I think it's actually that I grew up on the Internet with a lot of international and UK friends and was a rebellious teenager during the Bush administration)
It's fine, it's not like it makes you a bad person or unable to use spices but I repeat myself. I only ever use the re in theatre but I do think licence is more correct. I can't remember which gray/grey is which. And I lived in the UK for 4 years.
i wonder if there's a cilantro thing happening where because I did not grow up really strongly associating coconut with food and drink but DID strongly associate it with sunscreen, my brain smells coconut qua coconut and goes "ew! yuck!" the way people smell the limonene in cilantro and go "soap"
I'm weird: I associate coconut with sunscreen and I still love the stuff. Even shredded coconut and coconut-filled candies. Mmmmm... sunscreen.
i've had various of coconut candy and loved all of it, something about it in a *beverage* fucks with me. I cook with shredded coconut and coconut milk/cream a fair amount.
(the cilantro thing isn't a genetics thing after all - there's a gene that makes cilantro BITTER but the main thing people are reacting to is cultural; were you raised in a culture where limonene is in foodstuff, or in a cleaning agent?)
I have this problem with blueberries. My mom constantly covered the house in blueberry Yankee candles to the point of giving me headaches and to my brain it's a do-not-eat smell now.
Wait When is it used as a cleaning agent?
It's apparently used as a solvent: > Used as a solvent for rosin, waxes, rubber; as a dispersing agent for oils, resins, paints, lacquers, varnishes, and in floor waxes and furniture polishes.
Reminds me of the Shimmer commercial from SNL: It's a floor wax and a dessert topping! www.youtube.com/shorts/HY4MI...
that makes a LOT of sense
oh god I hate that taste in cilantro, I'm not sure i knew that that was limonene but it makes sense
yeah the primary flavour component in cilantro and coriander is a scent that's VERY strongly associated with cleaning products in the modern West and I'm *convinced* that's what's behind cilantro aversion b/c It Tastes That Way To Everyone
Oh yeah just want i want on a hot day, a beer that tastes like my kids sprayed sunscreen in it 🤢
I love coconut itself but coconut flavoring is almost always a mistake without shreds of coconut present imho
you got to the bottom of the can?
i poured it into my beer stein because it's not a shitty American pilsner (positive, complimentary) and I'm not a barbarian, and I'm [gestures vaguely in growing up poor] about wasting food and its vileness is oddly compelling, so I'm probably going to finish it i'm not happy about it, though
this is the CLOSEST a beer has ever come to using coconut and being good and i'm intrigued by what they're doing right. they're not afraid to let it be... murky. the mouthfeel is unbeerlike in a way that i find profoundly interesting. if i do not breathe in until it is in my mouth i... like it?
if i do breathe in as I take a sip I get this big smack to the face of hair product, though, and that's unfortunate. maybe drinking this one from the can WAS the right play and I fucked up
i am reliably informed that there are coconut-related drinks which are good. i am willing to believe that this is true or take the statement on faith. i have yet to experience a good coconut-themed beer.
you put the beer in the coconut and throw the can away
ok valid
