But! There are patterns among trans female populations that need to be understood better because they have to do with our needs, our differences, our health. It isn't about defining the boundaries of transness, it's about better understanding those of us who are different from birth.
I don't know if the differences lie in our brain anatomy (there is some real evidence of this), something endocrine, or more subtle pervasive differences. But you can often see them.
I was noticeably different from both my cis brothers pretty much right away, and those differences showed up in childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood. They're behavioral and physiological. Some are subtle, some are more obvious.
My parents have always noticed this, and clearly others do too. It isn't even that I'm queer and the other "males" in my family aren't—we're a pretty queer and GNC-heavy family.
When I talk about being constitutionally different like this, I'm not arguing that it proves or validates my transness—I'm saying that I had to live with these differences not being understood or tolerated, not even truly named, for all of my formative years, and it was very traumatic.
Honestly, anyone looking at such a definition and being sad or even "thankful in a grudging way" that it doesn't include them has it backwards; there's a whole pile of yearning for and fear of belonging without specific symptoms that encompasses being trans.
My own frustration was realizing things only in retrospect but only to expunge shame, not even to tread this path earlier. I'm thankful that my mom misidentified what was going on (as did I but in a different way) but still vowed to keep nasty people angry at non masculinity at arm's length.
I'm sure there's a wide variety of differences like this among trans girls and women, and they don't all show up in the same ways. But there is something there and it can have a big impact on our lives.
I want people like me to be better understood just like I would for any difference, not just so we can be more accepted but so that our needs—social, medical, emotional—can be better met.
This is also why I prefer a definition of "transsexual" as something like the sibling of being intersex, something constitutional. Not as the only definition that everyone has to identify with, but at least as one definition. It still proves the best way for me to understand myself.
interesting. thank you very much for making this thread. it doesn't much line up with my self-conceptions wrt transness, but i can definitely see why people might prefer this model now
I think it’s less common these days
that makes sense, the people i know who mentioned favoring a biological view of transness have generally been much older than me. i ended up being sort of put off by their arguments because they didn't carve out space for my friends and i. thank you for doing that!
After late in life discovering (actually more a case of accepting) that I am what we call “trans,” I saw my entire life history in a different light. All sorts of “signs” were there in childhood. One of the oddest things to me is I’ve always had bottom dysphoria. As a kid, how did I even know?
🙏🏻😭😭