Like, they dedicated half the movie to a family that was just on a sailboat who they had to rescue randomly, but they fucked around on the island BY THEMSELVES for the entire movie ANYWAY, and the only payoff to this B-plot is that the small child can fit through the bars of a gate at the end.
Yea I don’t know why they keep insisting on having a family subplot to the movie. The first Jurassic world was brought down by the kids going through a divorce and we don’t even get anything out of that. The daughter clone in the second for it to barely be relevant for the third one.
I just don't think it's even possible for this series to be good anymore
Chekhov's Child
Here's why I think this is the worst one: With ALL the Jurassic films, except the first one which is perfect, you can ask yourself "why is this happening?" You'll notice that in all of them except this one, it's happening for a reason, even if that reason is stupid. in this one, things just HAPPEN.
And the first one was "we spared no expense, except for the IT guy."
Or just "capitalism"
The opening scene shows this mysterious hybrid monster and then it show up in the last 20 minutes to eat a guy and be the last obstacle before they get away, like. This is the movie equivalent of when you start writing something out on a sign and realize you're running out of space for the letters.
Last line on the sign: "They're truly beautiful and deserve our respect - RUN!"
I read somewhere that the reason this one was made in the first place was just because the studio realized they had nothing to release for summer 2025, and they just rushed to put this film together to take up the slot. I don't know if it's true or not, but it sure feels like it.
I wouldn't be surprised, given the claims this will be a stand-alone film, rather than the start of another trilogy.
*And* the mysterious hybrid monster looks dumb as hell and not at all scary or intimidating.
Probably why its never shown clearly in the movie. They modeled the whole thing just to show us the head and like an arm. I think there's one shot where you can see its extra set of arms.
good lord this. its so goofy and dumb looking
This is the movie equivalent of when you start writing something out on a sign, you realize you're running out of space for the letters ... and you write the rest of your text on the BACK of the sign where no one will ever see it.
They really are determined to ride this genetically modified dinosaurs story, but just think even they realised how bad the D.Rex looked that, they kept its appearance limited.
I'm imagining this with the T-rex in the first movie: shown in silhouette in the opening, and then only showing back up to eat the velociraptors at the end
But the 1st movie starts off with them delivering the Alpha Velociraptor to the park. Followed by the explanation of their hunting patterns. Then feeding a cow to them. T-Rex wasn't the opening dinosaur.
Thank you for acknowledging that the first film is (correctly) perfect
I think calling it the worst one though is just off the mark when Dominion exists. That's just... Such an undignified work, like all around. The type of official product that is as outlandish as bad fanfiction I enjoyed it as a mid movie, I just was praying it wouldn't be like World and it wasn't
Hmmm... In general I think that going into it to ask "why is this happening" is just setting oneself up for disappointment, sadly. I don't think they'll do better. They haven't in a long, fucking long time. Then that just means this is what the franchise is now. We'll always have the original
Like, maybe movies now are about making you feel something rather than being something? When the evil business guy took the gun in secret? That felt scary, yeah. But I know nothing came out of that really. It was something I enjoyed feeling, so then they felt comfortable enough in... Dropping itlol
And I don't mean "All movies" but... That sure can be seen in the ones that don't try a lot. Comedies and action and whatevs I just think the answer to your question is "because it's the formula". And at that point, the exception to the rule, will be just that. And in the meantime. Idfk
I feel like that’s par for the course of Gareth Edwards. Brilliant dude that just can’t stick the landing for some reason.