After Gavin Newsom exited the stall, he walked up to me, wagged a finger in my face, said "How do you like that, sport?," then he smirked and walked away.

While Gavin Newsom was in the stall, he was having a loud phone conversation with someone. He was talking about how Internet Explorer is his favorite web browser and he makes all of his employees use it.

After Gavin Newsom got off the phone, he tried to talk to me while I was doing my business in another stall. He told me he always keeps a bar of chocolate in his pocket so he can give pieces to strangers' dogs.

Gavin Newsom also told me he uses generative AI to write his responses when he gets texts from his wife and children. He said it's so much easier than thinking of what to say and that everyone should try it.

UPDATE: A spokesperson says that Gavin Newsom wiped his rear using a handkerchief he keeps in his pocket and washes once a week. "Any suggestion that Gov. Newsom did not wipe is categorically false," the spokesperson said.

The spokesperson did not deny the report that Gavin Newsom failed to flush and wash his hands

Sources tell me that this isn't the first time Gavin Newsom has displayed concerning, unhygienic behavior in the bathroom. In one instance, two close associates said they witnessed Newsom exit a restroom stall while eating chocolate soft-serve ice cream in a cone.

UPDATE: Gavin Newsom has invited me and Jack Posobiec to discuss these allegations on his podcast. "I'm giving you a chance to sit at the Big Boys' Table," Newsom wrote in an email. I've reluctantly accepted.

UPDATE: Gavin Newsom told me that he's cancelling the podcast because he just learned about a new homeless encampment and wants to destroy desperate people's possessions with his own hands. He said it makes him "feel so powerful."

You heard it here first, folks!