Giovanni Capriglione, a right wing state rep in Texas who had an affair with a stripper, reportedly told his mistress that he wanted to ejaculate into batter for cookies that would be sold at his daughter's bake sale. www.sacurrent.com/news/gop-tex...
Do republican voters care about that?
What part of 'They'll happily vote for Satan as long as he has the 'right' letter after his name' is confusing?
He is retiring
Nope.
He seems charming. /s Typical Pedocon Republican, though.
That's fk'n gross
This is the platform of the Texas Republican Party.
Party of family values, amiright?
If he had a few more people, they could make bukkakie batter.
Chef’s kiss
"Spunkmeyer" tho? That just doesn't sound like the creamy goodness I'd be looking for in a cookie.
😂😂😂
I think I just threw up in my mouth…🤢
There was a couple in Louisiana who got arrested in 2019 for doing this exactly thing with cupcakes (amongst other sex crimes) - she was a teacher and he was a cop. They got caught because they filmed it. She got 41 yrs. He got 100 yrs.
🤯
And they bash Californians
Jealous
Right wing state rep is a weird way to say Republican. Why is Bluesky so hesitant to use the word Republican whilst discussing Republicans .
Sick fucks. I’m not an ill wisher but these sick fucks need be gang raped and then castrated. Real deep issues in the GOP!
EWWWW
The not shocking at all part? Trump endorsed him. I think Trump should get a cookie as reward for picking such a winner.
TX Tax payer dollars hard at work. Sick bastard.
You win the day. I can’t stop laughing. Thank you
🤮
Writes in notepad: no Texas bake sales.
As always…not a drag queen.
Watch out, Ken Paxton. You got competition now.
The funny part? Capriglione voted to impeach Ken Paxton!
lol @ this GIF
JFC this guy’s district is in suburban DFW wtf.
Only the absolute worst people in the repugnican party. My God.
I see a Trump birthday card and drawing in his near future.
But, according to the right wing, wouldn't baking your semen be murder?! It's burning future babies!
bsky.app/profile/rhon...
what in the actual fuck!!! These people are sick as hell.
I guess this guy really sticks to his anti-choice "guns"? Even though they are likely shooting blanks.
Ewww….
What the fuck is wrong with these ppl? And they say undocumented people are a threat 🙄
My Mother would never allow us to buy anything from a bake sale. She always said, “You don’t know what their kitchens look like”. I guess that’ll need to be updated.
The Representative greatly misunderstood his Project Mayhem homework assignment.
Mine too. And when I was a teacher my teaching mentor said, "throw away anything a kid bakes for you." So sorry for all the thoughtful cookies, but they went into the trash.
I had a coworker who brought the best homemade eggnog to the office Christmas party. Then someone said she didn’t wash her hands after using the toilet. I guess there was enough Jameson in there to keep us from getting sick.🤢
That's a other reason. I see women leave the restroom w/o washing all the time in public. Like, why????????? I have hovered for 20 years.
And I’ve been wiping your pee off the seat before I sit down for 20 yrs 👍
who knew that the adult cookies were more dangerous? i always ate the stuff my children baked with or without me. never had a problem
Hmmm... I used to do the cakewalk (musical chairs) on Halloween at the Elementary School I went to. My parents never complained about eating those luscious cakes baked by volunteers.
How DISGUSTING!
It's not a coincidence that those who imagine that sexual predators are everywhere, are the same people with the most depraved imaginations.
That’s one sick mofo.
I will never go to a bake sale again I will never go to a bake sale again I will never go to a bake sale again I will never go to a bake sale again…
Dead
I dont eat anything people make in their homes. Sorry, not gonna get in on that potluck.
Omg. The Assholes with Casseroles run bake sales, yeah? 😦
I actually forgot about this nickname! Thanks for reminding me.
This and don’t let right wingers near your kids.
Oh, you can go, if you choose to, if it’s a good cause, and you can donate or even buy something. But please don’t, and I mean this most politely, eat it.
Slurpy MAGAt.
Who among us has not whacked off into the cookie dough.
🤦♀️
Every time they point their finger at drag queens and trans people, it's a confession.
Typical behavior of GOP elected officials
How even can a person be this disgusting 🤢
No i know everyone wants to go “what?!” but IT’S A THING WITH THESE MEGALOMANIAC CONTROL MONSTERS This fucken guy was a SWAT COMMANDER and he. Actually. Did. It. Louisiana sheriff's deputy sentenced to 100 YEARS for child sex crimes
Note: #JeffLandry, then AG now governor, at the trial “Today, Cynthia Perkins admitted to her crimes and pled guilty in court. [S]he not only waived any right to appeal, and attempt to avoid conviction, but she also spared the victims from reliving her horrific crimes during this particular trial.”
This is so fucking creepy
It’s so awful, and we have to know that this is how people who seek authority in order to abuse it think and behave. It’s not a few isolated incidents. They are ALL trying to see how much they can get away with. That’s why we MUST believe women and we MUST believe children.
Figures the first statement to spew from this monster’s mouth includes the corker “Jesus Christ has forgiven me.”
Wut?
he authored the tx ‘trigger ban’ abortion law, it banned abortion of any sort & enacted huge penalties for anyone assisting in any manner with an abortion so to be accused of paying for any abortion shows his hypocrisy, he just got endorsed by trump & while ending his campaign is refusing to resign
what the fuck
🤢🤢🤢
Kink shaming is wrong a BUT
Not this time
"kink" isn't having strangers - and CHILDREN - unknowingly eat your jizz cookies.
This isn't kink, which is consensual: this is abuse. Shame that all you like, it's just wrong all the way.
Exactly.
I'm going to be sick..wtf
Always a right wing white thing
Normal day in Texas republican politics
La mejor baza que tenemos para ganarles a estos malnacidos es que la mayoría están podridamente degenerados.
JAJAJAJA JAJAJAJA 🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Another MAGAt scumbag
I just. I don’t even know what to say
Here is Giovanni Capriglione with the HUD Secretary Scott Turner at the White House last month. www.instagram.com/goldmancraig...
I can only imagine…like the drumpf Epstein video
Is there a psychologist on this thread who can explain why predominantly Christian voters elect such sick mofos? (Yeah, sorry, I *do* kink shame when unwitting victims are involved).
Sexual assault isn’t kink. Kink is consensual. So you’re good.
#Republicans
Staunch conservatives, man…
Make America Gag Again
This is the most underrated comment of the day
🙏
omg!! 😱
Oh….
THATS FUCKING NASTY
Always the GOP with the sickest shit.
Guy, get help.
GOP Nazis are pedophiles, perverts, fucktards, and degenerates.
This is who they have always been. I was born and raised in Texas.
Thank you. Context is helpful.
Reminds me of a hentai manga I read. Difference being, REAL people are being forced into this jackass's fetish. Turdpublicans are truly loathsome creatures.
That’s an interesting answer to the question: what would Jesus do?
I’d prefer he didn’t
Kink shamer
Yup
Jesus Christ what the fuck is wrong with him. Excuse me while I go throw up.
Wow. That is a special kind of sick. How twisted can you get? Don’t answer. That was rhetorical
What. The. Fuck!?
when you read this and you realize that this GOP freak is still far from the worst of Republicans
Between this and the lawyer in the Texas AG's office fantasizing about his coworker being anally raped by a cylindrical asteroid it's been a banner year for Texas Republicans insane fetishes
And yet, Texas voters keep reelecting this scum.
Well, TX elections are rigged. One ballot drop box per 100-mile-wide county, limited early/mail-in voting, gerrymandered districts, and you have to register at least 30 days before an election. Red states have been purging voter rolls less than 30 days before elections.
They've been tightening more and more their control for over 30 years. The state is the main lab for the rest of the country. People refused to listen throughout that time. Current experiment is taking over control of the 3 massive blue islands of Houston, San Antonio, & Dallas, especially Houston.
These are just ordinary Texas republicans. They’re all like this.
It probably is a banner year every year. We just don’t hear about it 😊
We still don’t know what Ken Paxton did.
His soon-to-be-divorced wife does.
I hoped this was that guy, but nope. It’s *another* GOP freak.
Gross Old Perverts
I think we should assume this is they way 99% of them are.
And this too. Being a pervert is a prerequisite for MAGA politicians bsky.app/profile/bgru...
Hold on I'm sorry what
This sounds like if Chuck Tingle used his powers for evil
What
But anyone dressing in a fursuit is a threat... state of epic hypocrisy.
I forgot about that!
god i wish that was me
I missed that one the first time around. Excuse me while I go cry in the corner.
of course you did. because it reflected badly on your republican friends.
Wha?
They hate toys in the bedroom without men.
In front of his kids! Don't forget that tidbit. He wanted his kids to see him anally raped by the cylindrical asteroid.
What?! Why is it so complicated for (cons.) men to leave the kids out of it??? 🙃
GOP = Gang of Pedophiles
oh yeah forgot that part
Wait what??????
Fucking monsters walk among us.
Good god. 🤢
Back up. What did I just read?!
Oh just your average republican
Here you go. futurism.com/texas-politi...
"During the debacle, Stone described using said asteroid to sexually assault Webster while his wife and children watched." Republicans are disgusting human beings.
These ppl should not be around children let alone be able to run for any sort of government position
There's always kids for these freaks
The way I read it is that he wanted her children to witness her being rapes by the asteroid
That's the correct reading yes
Actually. They are both men.
I’m sorry what?
this man has argued cases for the state of texas before the supreme court www.404media.co/texas-solici...
SO many yikes! Wow. I don't know how I missed that.
Now republicans are ruining random space objects with their perversions too! How messed up does your brain have to be to leap from "space rock that killed the dinosaurs" to this usage?
Holy fuck
There's one other redacted before that one that also got me stuck for a minute trying to figure out what it might've been. Still no idea on either redaction.
Okay after mental rolodexing past 1) bus, 2) call, 3) period, I’ve concluded (based on the later redaction) it’s something like “dose”
Paging Dr Freud, stat!
as one does
Jesus Christ.
Not a drag queen. Not a trans person.
And there’s this from Oklahoma state schools superintendent, right wing media whore Ryan Walters: www.kgou.org/education/20...
Please everyone - consider running for office. You are better than this guy. And please vote, bc there are ppl out there who know this about this vile human and would still have voted for him.
Yes. See @runforsomething.net
🤦♀️
Most moral Republican
The protein-enhancement crowd has gotten, er, out of hand...
Yuckkkkkkk
Whaaa?? I… Whaaaat? Like, how do these dudes come up with this? Whaaaat?
Not a drag queen
This is a terrible day to have eyes
brb gotta tell the kids we're not making cookies today. banana bread, maybe
Banana?? Poor choice of your fruit.
Nobody wants eggplant bread🍆🍆
😂
Next on Fox News: “Girl Scouts woke for refusing to sell cum filled cookies”
Da Fuq? I'll repeat... can the wives of these republican men please fuck your significant others like you have a temperature above 98° and an active pulse... I know it may be asking a lot, but maybe they'll stop trying to fuck the rest of us & our kids...
Doubtful
Listen. I am well aware that a majority of today's GOP politicians are lowlifes. There is absolutely nothing that these scumbags can do that will ever surpr.... 😳 😱 🤢
yeah, the cookie thing actually did surprise me. any other weird sexual thing? nah, expected. cookies at a bake sale for children? who they're related to? that is brain breaking.
Something ain’t right with this party. There some real evil in it.
That’s a real special kind of fucked up.
What the fuck? Jizz in a sock or in your underwear and use some TP to clean it up like a decent human being ffs.
I assume that Many Texan Bake sale aficionados are now checking to see if Giovanni Captiglione lives in their Bake Sale attendance zone …
“Men” are a problem
Okay there might be something to this PedoCon theory….
Denny Hastert and so much more
Crikey
"Giovanni Capriglione" just your typical Texan is every way
These people are fucking weird. And disturbed and belong in cells.
I think at this point there's more than enough evidence for the Dems to just run with "they're the Party of Pedophiles" from now on but they're too cowardly to do so
I'm not usually here to kinkshame but in this instance....yeah, I'm kinkshaming. wtf.
This is not a kink. That would be assault.
*sigh* yes. DOING this would be assault. Fantasizing about it is a kink. Words are important to me, too.
I didn’t mean sound pedantic, sorry. I was just shocked and reacted about the vileness of such an act.
Kink requires consent.
I would give this a like, but it would throw off the ironic math...
Well, now it's been recorded for posterity.
Did he actually *do* it, or just fantasize about it? The fantasy is the kink. Which is gross enough on its own, imo.
We can shame a (fantasy) kink, just not ban it
Every single GOP SOB lawmaker is a fucking hypocrite!!!
sounds about right
Great. File one more for the Pedocon Theory books.
I don’t think these string of words belong in proximity with each other, I have to believe this
Seriously there is no low for these a$$holes.
Hoping Mr. Fields never had this thought.
The level of disrespect is pathological.
Texas did you hear this? You fucking asshole representative is a demented pervert! What a sicko!!
Texas Penal Code - PENAL § 22.09. Tampering With Consumer Product. “Consumer Product” means any product offered for sale to or for consumption by the public and includes “food”
Enjoy your meal 😝
No wonder the Republicans welcomed him with open arms 😬 🫣
😳🤮
... excuse me but what the fuck?
...I would like to unread that, thanks.
the natural harvester piece. (ask your bois on the now more than ever podcast about that.)
Vomit worthy
What kind of a damaged person do you have to be for your thoughts to even go in this direction?
Its this logic I want to do something bad and get away with it, its person that never faces consequences, doing stuff just to feel a trill, the fear that he might face a consequence is what makes it exciting or fun.
Secretly putting human biological fluids that are vectors for infection into a food item sold to unsuspecting victms, is technically biological terrorism, and could at the maximum, be prosecuted under US Federal Law as a terrorist act. If the Justice Department wanted to.
This is sick.
😂
But it’s Texas, so sure to be re-elected.
This is really particularly disgusting but really doesn’t surprise me. They are all hypocrites and disgusting human beings. Release the Epstein files and the report on Matt Gaetz as well! GOP = Gang Of Pedophiles
And these are the ones saying queer folk are damaging to kids.
If post-Musk Twitter taught me anything, it’s that most conservatives only pretend to care about the wellbeing of kids to attack LGBT people. After Musk, it seems like they got comfortable enough to say what they really think, and it’s really creepy.
Yup. It's classic Conservative dogma. Hell, it goes back to Dr Kellogg making cornflakes to stop wanking and all that shit.
Your usage of “dogma” is such a funny coincidence because I was just thinking about this example of a Brazilian conservative guy (somewhat internet famous a few years ago) who was ranting on Twitter 2 years ago about how according to Catholic dogma it’s fine for adult men to marry 14-year-old girls.
And just to be clear, his rant was DEFENDING the dogma and the notion that these types of marriage are correct. The same conservative guy who is against consensual relationship between two adult men/women lol
Again, very Conservative. It's the same shit Matt Walsh argues, that the idea of kids getting pregnant from nonce adults is only bad because they aren't married.
i remember watching a video of Walsh reading his transphobic beaver book to a group of children who were probably 5 or 6. Matt was in persona as Matt, and the children were a mix of ill at ease and mildly horrified. I felt bad for them. Matt was oblivious to their reactions. as expected.
Republicans are the big tent party for a people of certain kind. Trump has been the best evangelist in this matter.
How does a guy named Giovanni Capriglione wind up in Texas politics, anyway? His personal and campaign sites as well as Ballotpedia don’t discuss anything about him before college.
Pedocon strikes again
GOP yuck 🤢
Pedocons
Oh cum on!! Obviously a lie!!
Where does the GOP find these people?
These people find the GOP. The Republican Party has been their natural home since Ford decided to wipe Nixon's slate clean. It's the place to go if you think you're beyond the consequences of your actions, no matter how dangerous or stupid or depraved. It's the party of no personal responsibility.
@szyszka.bsky.social vindicated once again
Oh what the fuuuuuck
gang of psychopaths
open.substack.com/pub/joneseli...
GOPervs eddmarv.medium.com/party-loyalt... & eddmarv.medium.com/birds-of-a-f... 47 = ring leader open.substack.com/pub/joneseli... & trumpfile.org MarALago = Crime Scene www.politico.com/story/2019/0... CPAC www.cnn.com/2024/03/27/p... Free(dumb)Caucus www.politico.com/news/2022/03... @thehill.com
Yeah the alpha male. 🤮
Putting your white stuff into what..? Tips here, if you have such a fetish, maybe the best way is just keeping it to yourself. Why you want others know that?
Republican party is a magnet for the sickest, most perverted bastards around. They elect and aggressively defend their career criminal pedophile rapist president. These are sick, sick people.
I feel sorry for the reporters having to actually write that.
When are these reprobates doing their job?
If we ever save the republic and topple MAGA I think we need a massive investigation into every last Republican. The men anyway.
Include the women. They're supporting these males.
Look at the DV map of the US. Most concentrated MAGA country
Why is this showing up in the MLB feed?
He's an Astros fan
Wait, wat?
Jesus Christ what the fuck?!
I don’t care as long as he protects my kids from books about penguins having two daddies!!!
I know some people have affairs and are kinky, but WTF dude your daughter’s bake sale?!?
what the motherfcking fck is wrong with the gop scum? who even thinks this??? “Giovanni Capriglione, a right wing state rep in Texas who had an affair with a stripper, reportedly told his mistress that he wanted to ejaculate into batter for cookies that would be sold at his daughter's bake sale”
Good on her for ratting him out. The things men tell strippers…
LISTEN. A few of my friends are strippers or ex-strippers and they all could probably get credits toward a psychology or sociology degree given how much they listen to men and have to navigate male egos and fragility. Strippers could write anthropology books on men.
I bet it would sell too. Societal service.
I haven't had lunch yet 🤢.
Whyyyyyyy do they always involve kids in their shit
Dominance? Establishing that children are property?
what an odd thing to say
Reel it in, bud.
Fuck that guy. It’s ALWAYS the ones with extreme views that end up being guilty of the very things they are against. POS.
Exactly. So effing twisted.
I hope a reporter will ask him: “ Did you jerk-off into cookie dough so that children would eat your semen?” Maga is fucking weird
Beyond weird... Totally demented.
MAGA are pedophiles and abusers.
So, not a drag queen.
That would be sexual assault of minors
Americans are disgusting.
Holy fucking shit, that is the worst, most disgusting thing I have ever heard in my entire life Excuse me while I go projectile vomit
Everytime I think Republican politicians have hit rock bottom and can't go any lower, somehow, they do
I'm absolutely an optimist who always tries to see the best in humanity, and I don't want to think it this way, but man, Republicans like this really are just, irredeemably evil
And I don't wanna hate Texas either, but *why* is it, just......like this
Are they ALL this awful? Good god these Republicans.
www.dailykos.com/stories/2019...
🤮🤮🤮
I had to re-read the sentence to make sure I read it right... even by weird standards, that is weird...
That’s not weird that is serial killer type sick! This guy has got serious mental problems.
We now see proof that sexual pervert-ness (perversion) is a public health concern. When not dealt with properly, it turns into a national security threat.
Yeah... I think a better description would be "nuts!". As with many things, it's probably just the tip of the iceberg... 🤯
Nuts…
Between this and the ryan walters story I am convinced they are ALL a bunch of sex freaks. I'm serious. This isn't run of the mill kink (feet, spanking, etc) this is disgusting, adolescent boy shit.
uh what
Same state that thinks furries are a threat and view us as predators. Meanwhile these sickos do stuff like this...
I'm genuinely asking: what is WRONG with men?
My first thought
Like the guy who caped his own semen- WTF?!?! Who even thinks about this shit let alone does it?
O.M.G!! WTF?!!!! I had to look it up! Do men think their semen is a superpower? So narcissistic www.abc.net.au/news/2019-01...
Again--what is wrong with men!?
A daily question I ask myself
I just...I don't know any women that would even consider something so gross.
Let's take it further than that...that would even come up with the idea
And then there's "The Pony Cum Jar Project". Please don't look that up if you ever want to look us in the eyes. Yes, men are not OK.
Dude.
I know, dude. I KNOW. We're not OK.
May YOU be the change we want to see in the world. 😭
They are mostly disgusting.
Right?!?
🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢
Andddd that's enough internet for today
I just can’t…. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
During the (AIDS) eighties that would be considered attempted (mass) murder.
How do Republican men get this sick?
“Maybe me not the real monster here”
Fantastic choice of reaction! ❤️
😂
Best laugh all day thank you. This reminds me of old Twitter. It was awesome.
😂
Well played
No. Just no. Too crazy. Going back to sleep and will see if things are better when I wake up.
I see.
The GOP: the party of family values!
Stripper was 18 and alleges he paid for several abortions Which he denies.
The Epstein Party strikes again.
