Tattoo of a penis

You take the weekends off?

Maybe the addition of a waterfall?

The rest of the tattoo doesn’t even make it look less like a dick! Perfection

I love the idea of every time they try to fix it, it only makes it more phallic

If you follow Reddit tattoo subs you will see accidental dick about once a month. It’s wild

None of them are accidents

Yup! Those tattoo artists are *really* dicks! 😂

What is it supposed to be, an intentional dick??

bsky.app/profile/mari...

hahaha!

Talk about false advertising

He needs to wear shorter shorts lol

Isn't this always the answer???

Show off those whole legs! Solve your accidental dick tattoo problem! Two birds and all

Lol two birds and two stones pajarito - Wiktionary, the free dictionary share.google/nQNskmvPxDdu...

lmaoooooooo thank you for sharing what a gift

Or longer. Bermudas, maybe.

Tell him to transition. His shorts will get shorter.

anyone suggest she add a pearl necklace yet?

Someone PAID for that. They paid! 😬

While I think some look amazing, I'm personally not into tattoos for myself. It might have been during COVID lockdown; I binge watched a show called Tattoo Nightmares. I was very scripted but interesting to see how a really bad tattoo could be fixed.

He could go the other way and have the 'head' laser removed, terminating the neck closer to the chin.

Yes, ivy vines at the bottom are exactly what it needs…omg.

I thought he was just bragging.

This bit specifically makes one wonder how anyone could consider it to be anything but

Just tattoo a Speedo over it

White vines (or really any color) erupting from the center of the base would make it pop

🤣

Will you take time off laughing for the long weekend, and pick up again on Tuesday?

I’m looking at it every which way and it looks like a penis. Period. In fact, no clue what it’s supposed to be.

Longer shorts???

This is the full tattoo. It was posted here. Most people recommended adding a plinth. www.reddit.com/r/tattooadvi...

"I call it 'Dangle'."

Clearly the solution is to wear sluttier shorts. ^_^

oh no

And that it emerges from his shorts like that 🤣

Accidental Dick sounds like a delightful comedic detective series on the BBC

In Scandinavia it’s called Oops Cock!

I just literally LOL’d.

That's a horse cock.

What was it meant to be ?

I thought he said Ivy Veins 😂

Gaffaws on weekends.

thinking a bunch of ivy vines, preferably sprouting and branching out from a source at the dead center of the piece's bottom

Oh no don't apologize, I'm still smiling!!!!!!!

Yeah, 'ivy vines' will work ... especially if the tattoo artist hears 'veins'! 😂😂😂

what even is this other than a penis

^^^ A question wives have asked about husbands since time immemorial

Hey, at least 0.1% of all husbands give a scratch when their wives are itchy/have bug bites (this statistic includes the husbands who entirely scritch the wrong spot)

Dudes, it’s not that hard to buy a dry erase marker, for the record. You can find the spot no matter how bad you are at “hubband”!

yeah every attempt to imagine what the covered up bit looks like is just "more shaft and some balls?"

I was going to say "Portrait of Dwayne The Rock Johnson, Artist Unknown" but the person said they wanted to "add vines" which would be strange

I can maybe make out a neck and collarbones and a chin with a dimple. I’ve been drawing some Luke Skywalker lately and what little I can make out looks a bit like him.

But it took some work for me to get there. Mostly it looks like a pee-pee

Hard agree. That can only be a human glans.

i hit like on this before i even looked at what you were replying to, sage

I did too.

bsky.app/profile/lole...

i love that his conclusion is like "i know what will make this look less like a penis: adding big fat ropes spurting out of it"

looks like a bust (heh) but we can't see anything above the chin because of the shorts

it's probably a portrait, most likely some kind of roman statue that every basic white guy gets. what you're seeing is the bottom of the chin and the neck and the artist made a very funny choice on how to end the neckline on the tattoo

The base of a bust A bust base, if you must

I was thinking of the end of a squid but then I turned the phone around

bsky.app/profile/lole...

oh gross he got the fashy marble bust tattooed. he fully deserves this outcome & i hope it makes him miserable every day. :)

I suppose you've figured this out but the tip is someone's neck. We are witness to a bit of chin, leading up to a face concealed by the shorts.

no i did not figure that out lol

Squid? It's literally my only guess

"hey guys do you think if I add shooting ropes to my accidental dick tattoo it'll look less phallic?"

Genuinely laughing at this

I’m an old lady who hasn’t seen a duck in years so my eye saw a sweet dog’s head.

Enjoy!

Why aren’t we posting Reddit 😩

Solution is short shorts

I've never laughed this hard at 8:00 a.m. Thank you

I thiiiink we're seeing the neck and chin of a portrait tattoo, but it is so hard to see anything but hog

bsky.app/profile/lole...

Accidental dick is a mood

😆 we've all been an accidental dick sometime

i'm not sure adding v̶e̶i̶n̶s̶ vines will help

Oh yes bro. Go add those ivy vines. Get back to us

How do I follow this man’s tattoo journey?

Genuinely think the tattoo is perfect. No edits.

Accidental Dick has to be an unreleased Morrissey song.

I think you'll find that Morrissey is very much a dick on purpose.

He does it so effortlessly, it's a gift

There is a link to a bizarrely on theme Wikipedia page in that thread.

Gotta just learn to swagger

Nah, just invest in good short shorts or live with providing a little mystique for the occasional ogler

This is hilarious

I can’t stop laughing at this the comments are 🔥

Accidental Dick is the name of my Ska band.

Oof I feel bad but lmao

A few years? It would have taken most of us few minutes to realize something was amiss.

Just posted this to my d&d slack which also includes my tattoo guy. Thank you for your service 😃

I think adding vines might make it worse.

I do love it’s “how do I get another tattoo” and not the obvious solution of raising or lowering your shorts inseam.

wait, but what IS it?

neck and chin of a statue bust

bsky.app/profile/lole...

A snickers bar

that's probably it

It looked to me like a child bending to crawl up his pants

Not actual size (too bad)

Ivy veines?

Wtf was it supposed to be? I've zoomed in, zoomed out.. it's a dick. Maybe get a condom tattooed over it and claim to be advocating safe sex?

bsky.app/profile/lole...

Maybe a crew-necked T-shirt saying “Release the Epstein files”.

I mean that is a neck and chin right?

I recommend Daisy Duke shorts going forward.

Ivy vines will not help.

Well dont tell reddit that

Mairzy doats and dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey

Now hold up let’s hear him out on this

Vines, veins, so similar.

💯💯💯💯👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼💯💯💯💯

Some spike right at the chin line would look boss.

People are endlessly stupid

what if they're like thick ropes?

Fig leaf it is.

I saw this one too lmao it’s so good

Is it the back of a dog’s head? 😆

bsky.app/profile/lole...

Yeah … cool art but not really a great leg tattoo

i guessed that too 😭

Do we know what it's supposed to be?

Is it supposed to be an upside down shark? This could be a fun guessing game.

Looks like someone from the neck up. Right near the shorts is the chin

Looks like a portrait bust with a stylized cutoff at the neck to me.

looks kinda neat but lol

This was a mistake.

Oversight by artist if you ask me

now I want to do nothing to it except caption it “retvrn to innocence” in a Roman font so at least when you’re staring down at the Roman penis you’re also thinking about Pure Moods

Nah, should say "No Regerts"

Well, most sculptors work with water… so maybe if he added a few drips of milky run-off at the bottom of the marble that would help let people know it’s a sculpture?

You missed a trick there. It should have been "Looks kinda knee-t..."

Incredible

none of my shorts cover that much thigh, ez solution.

Would never in a thousand years have been able to predict this was the rest of it

It is simply a very bad location. Still, add full shoulders.

So it's a dickhead.

gtbae

Somehow this makes it twice as funny

A literal and figurative dick head

Head .·˙ pɐǝH

"Let me get something real classy, so people know I'm quality."

I wonder if he's one of those "Classical western culture" people.

lol he should the guy in a fucking tank top

with a dick on it

That’s actually a pretty cool idea

i am losing it that is a penis

wrong kind of head

So it’s one and a half heads

lol he should just get the neck made more veiny

Just add the pectoral muscles

It’s a marble bust/sculpture if I’m thinking of the right Reddit thread

I once tried adding ivy vines to my dick. I still have nightmares.

I'm not even following this subreddit but got a notification for it *weeks* ago. It pleases me to see it surface here so don't apologize! This is gold lol The comments are also quite amusing.

i am almost crying laughing dude like that is nothing but a cock

that’s a good idea, he should totally add veins to this

I think the solution is to wear shorter shorts

What is it though, actually? It’s kind of hard (lol) to see anything else

I think it's the bottom of a Greek or Roman bust

Yeah, turn it so you're "standing" at his knee. You're seeing the bottom of the neck and the chin of the statue

Thanks to you I actually see it now!

Haha glad I could help 👍

Like the base of a statue? Have you seen a lot of statue bases shaped like dicks? I mean no judgement, I'm sure there's a museum somewhere.

bsky.app/profile/lole... Incredible 😂

Haaaaaaaa omg why! I reverse my earlier suggestion of a condom. Get that thing covered with giant full color chrysanthemums or something. Dude must have been high AF.

I’m thinking the artist may have done that on purpose 🤭