You need to be this wretched to get invited on Charlie Rose

I found chicken bones and other unspeakable things in keyboards before they became too inexpensive to bother with cleaning.

Nature Valley granola bars

I thought I was gross for only cleaning out my keyboard once every couple of weeks. This makes me feel better.

Normalize buying a new keyboard every year.

When I did IT back in the day, a remote location put their keyboards though the dish washer.

Yikes!!

I’d just buy a new keyboard 😳

Oh dear God....I feel like so....dirty...

Is this guy mostly just famous for writing a bad essay?

It was not a terrible book, actually. It's just that people only know or think they know what's in it from word of mouth.

Well, since he's tried to distance himself from the neo con movement, doesnt endorse a lot of what he wrote anymore, & many of the liberal democracys in the former warsaw pact have had limited success as being either/both liberal & democracys one could say it was a bad book. Prolly jumped the gun.

The End of History guy, yeah.

Bad books, but yes

Bruh, are you serious? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Imagine Luke Skywalker not having read Darth Vader's book. Ya'll are laughably ignorant.

There's a lot of books one must read lmao. Why would you even bother with Fukuyama? He's washed. It's been decades since he was proven laughably wrong.

He's not laughably wrong, his thesis is still valid.

*gestures broadly at literally everything* Okay lol

Ok, but his thesis is still valid. You don't know what his thesis is bc you havent read it either and you're ignorant like the dimwit I replied to.

I have transcended liberal bullshit. One day, may you too.

Ha! Ok dude, have fun learning about socialist power structure irl buddy. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Remember to never vote bc that's liberal bullshit that you've transcended. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

What's he eating? Sawdust?

You couldn't have waterboarded me into posting a screenshot like that what in the sweet thundering christ

Definitely right about the oats, with or without Joyce Carol.

Mine is full of crumbs and eyelashes

Ew

Who names his keyboad Das Keyboard, like seriously. Is his dog named Der Dog? * Der/Das = The.

😂😂

Fuk that end of history bullshit motherfucker.

You should know it didn't mean the end of history as in the end of interesting things happening.

No, it was the fallacious suggestion that liberal democracy (which has been objectively failing for decades) and neoliberal economics (&c) would lead us back to Eden. Fuking dumb.

rather than confront the crumbs, I went with stickers (what I don't know won't gross me out) #lazy

Now he's making history happen himself.

That's not eating That's a food fight 🤣🤣🤣

You think that’s bad, wait until you take out wall to wall carpet! You’ll never let THAT horrible stuff in your house again!

Gosh, it makes me like granola even less.

Lol I sure a lot of them look like that lol mine included

They have to be eating those Nature Valley bars. 🤢

Mmm, crunchy!

fukuyama has cherry browns presumably because he needs to balance his gaming and typing needs

Omg he never once shook his keyboard upside down in years?

I know, right? I do that at least once every 2 - 3 weeks.

Sometimes a bit of coffee or something sweet and it starts to stick 😁. I actually remove the key caps from time to time, out them in a soap bath and clean the remaining mess with a Q-tip. Afyrewaeds I put yhrm back on.

Cherry MX Browns are the end of history, got it, mm hmm

it's good to see he's getting his fiber I guess

well he’s not getting all of it

because some of it went into the keyboard. i feel like some of you aren’t actually getting this. the keyboard has some of it which is why he’s not getting all of it

You waited an hour and 14 minutes, just to return and explain the joke?...

hey, the joke explanation was itself another joke, hope this helps 👍

See? The other dude is just stirring the pot! I told him you won't think I'm piling on! Right on!

i think a pile on is three people minimum and it was only two of you, so. you squeaked by

why are we doing this everyone, let it go, we've all been there where we weren't sure if the joke landed or not. come on

I'm not piling on. I was seriously curious.

didn't come across that way at all lol

Not enough LOLs and emojis? How do you not pile on? Sad emojis?...

Um, we did actually understand that without your further clarification. Please power down your brain, wait ten seconds, and power it up again. Thank you.

bsky.app/profile/fatt...

hey there's no need for that

PhDs gotta PhD

if none of it went into the keyboard then he would be getting all of it. but alas,

I think granola bar makers could discount the average amount of crumbs from their nutritional info in good faith. "No FDA, those calories aren't bioavailable. They're on the floor."

Of course he's an MX Browns guy

It also helps if you clean your keyboard like... ever.

it’s so easy not to tell people things like this

Do you not realize I have had diarrheas since Easters?

While working tech support back in the day, if a caller would piss me off, one of the troubleshooting steps was to hold their keyboards above their head and give it a good "smack" on the side.

didn't have my glasses on and i literally thought this was a refrigerated display case of hazelnut truffles

guess i should wear my glasses, i'm lucky to be alive

not the end of history but the end of bad eatinghabbits

To be fair, this is just the aftermath of trying to eat one nature valley crunchy bar

😂🤣😂 I immediately thought of the same thing. Same brand even!

I've completely cut people out of my life for less than this.

There is no #alttext on this picture of a truly disgusting sight of a crumb-filled keyboard with the keys removed and that IS A GOOD THING. I may never look at a biscuit in the same way again.

Either went to the sawdust factory or has eaten exactly 3 Nature Valley bars

Shake that over a mug of hot water - keyboard Cuppasoup. 👌🏻

history has now ended thank you for your time

This looks like the floor of a joinery shop

Spend $20 and get a new one. That is disgusting.

That's a $100-150 keyboard if I recall correctly

Money well spent!

what the fuck, this is real

There’s enough to build another sandwich