Writer & Host of Internet Today w/ @eliotetc https://YouTube.com/InternetTodayTV
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Please Trump don’t die while I’m in Florida it would be so annoying. Lifted trucks would be driving around at half mast and shit. Sir please hold on till I’m back in California 😇 🙏 Sir
Looking healthy and normal sir 🫡
This future sucks
Watching everyone online fight about dark money knowing we’ve never touched that stuff. Just your standard cringe podcast ads for us thanks! (And our beloved paid subscribers of course)
imagine being so maniacally racist that you side with the fire over the firefighter
In honor of sandwich guy getting out of his legal pickle, here is the original video synced with Freedom - George Michael 1990.
Making them wear high-visibility vests over camo is such a good joke you couldn’t write it
YouTube yassified us without our permission!
Gotta assume we were number 26 better luck next year I guess
Is there a shirt brand and model# you like? Check some shirt tags and lemme know and I’ll see if the company offers them
They’re gonna get that Christopher Columbus from the PragerU videos to direct the new Harry Potter
I guess we could… idk
:)
Lol
Pritzker: This is not about fighting crime. This is about the President and his complicit lackey, Stephen Miller, searching for ways to lay the groundwork to circumvent our democracy, militarize our cities, and end elections.
Full episode youtu.be/0iPbIKis8VA
Uh oh
I hope comfort colors but I have to see how the print looks and the cost because they’re way more expensive and people might not actually care. But I love comfort colors
I have ordered samples and the store is set up. As soon as I check out what looks and fits best I’ll bring it online.
Humiliation Ritual
if i had to wake up everyday and pretend to care about “wokeness” in ads or whatever mentally brain dead rightwingers have to do everyday i think i would eventually kill myself. reading their words is so tiring. i imagine pretending to care writing them is much worse
I have actually legit started working on a merch store for us after 5+ years of no merch simply because I need this design on a tshirt.
One of the most remarkable and impactful transformations of all human technology and civilization in history is happening right now!
Omg
“Wow it sure is hot down here in Heaven”
In that case I’d just get regular ice cream
Insanely worse than you've been told. Well over 1.5 MILLION Africans died just coming to the Americas. Those Africans were taken on to boats and left at the bottom of the ocean.
Media outlets seem to have soured on the AI hype machine.
Marathon Internet today Livestream coverage
My name is Graham Platner and I’m running for US Senate to defeat Susan Collins and topple the oligarchy that’s destroying our country. I’m a veteran, oysterman, and working class Mainer who’s seen this state become unlivable for working people. And that makes me deeply angry.
"You know, the MSNBC name is kinda dated. Microsoft was part of it originally, but they divested like twenty years ago!" "You're right, let's drop everything but the MS."
Incredible. Magnificent
We r so cute in this
“Sound”
I unironically love this
Saw the sandman 🤘🤘🤘
@rickyftw.bsky.social Just watched the most recent episode! Great job! but now i've stared at labubu's for so long i will see them in my dreams and I don't think I will ever recover from this. Anyway can't wait til the next one! #internettoday #labubu
😭😭😭😭😭😭
You just know it smells crazy in there
Loading sandwiches into a tshirt cannon 💨
Blessed every day to have real friends instead of whatever the hell this is
Hahah I get it too sometimes I’m just gonna private it at this point. I think it means you’ve reached the end of content so - thanks!
Trump has federalized Roku City
Black coffee, no eye contact, staring at a wall
NEW — Video taken by a witness and shared with me tonight from DC’s Trinidad neighborhood shows FBI and Secret Service agents patrolling by foot and peering into cars with flashlights. (Per witness, residents made fun of agents, saying they can't get women and that's why they were doing this lol)
You’re laughing? A jackbooted thug took a footlong to the chest and you’re laughing?
Sitting at the coffee shop unperformatively
Damn Eliot’s whole collection got busted
"you know I had to do it to em"
Just utterly out of words to describe what we’re seeing. www.theguardian.com/world/2025/a...
I like the song and the look
Song of the summer
Father Time comes for us all
The new AFI song is actually really good and this is by far the coolest he’s ever looked so there’s that
This was the first thing I said about this soon-to-be death camp on our show back in June
In no particular order Eddington The Naked Gun Weapons Superman Sinners
You can’t game an algorithm when the people in charge of the algorithm are putting their thumb on the scale to keep your content from being seen, dumbass
It’s a bootleg 🤫
It’s kinda crazy how good this year has been for movies but I just saw Weapons and it might be my favorite so far. Perfection 🍿👌
lol I did not bid but I’m glad someone with artistic sensibilities is taking this auction seriously
someone hacked the audio system and started playing circus music as she was talking and i am WHEEZING
🆒
big day today for the republican party as they strategize how to cover up donald trumps involvement with the worlds most notorious child sex trafficker
Washington Post: “Is fascism bad? The answer may surprise you” Teen Vogue: “Here are three fun tips you can use this summer to disable an armored personnel carrier”
Liz Warren to her absolute credit shows up on CNBC and is willing to call everyone a stupid piece of shit in a way that even Bernie would refrain from
Congrats! Love your work
Yes
Sure
Naked Gun is fantastic and you absolutely need to go see it in the theater and laugh alongside other humans. I’m begging you to enjoy this rare moment of collective joy
Why is there a dvd logo???
Jingling keys
Yeah dude it’s awesome go subscribe @theonion.com
Nothing like holding and reading a physical copy of the newspaper!
HODL
Oh I read it as soon as it was released. Insanity
We did tech on the tech show… we made fun of everything but we still did it! youtu.be/Bexi-DpbMk4?...
Also brands don’t matter, the people doing the work matter and this is a lesson that every executive seems to have to learn the hard way. It’s infuriating
Colbert isn’t the news! It’s a comedy show. It’s not in the news division.
Exactly! These people are so fucking stupid and the only reason they are even in positions of power is because they’re all sociopaths.
Average CEO brain at work because AI absolutely can ask for a raise and go on strike because the company providing the service is going to raise rates constantly forever and drop your ass if you don’t pay.
I get what this question is doing rhetorically, but it’s noteworthy that this is the first time that Trump has acted like a scandal is something to be afraid of and it got everyone’s antennas up
The vibes at the Tesla Diner are unmatched
Rep. Massie: "Ro [Khanna] and I carefully crafted this legislation so that the victim's names will be redacted and no child pornography will be released...It's the president's own AG, FBI director, children, and vice president who said that these files need to be released."
How about you get kicked in the balls instead
Acab includes us
Vibes are good but humidity was really getting to people yesterday
Ran around NYC this morning. Cute lil city
I’ve come to realize that the entire MAHA movement is just grown ass adults tricking themselves into thinking that junk food is healthy because a random dye was removed.
i CANNOT stop watching this
dumbcat 
