Anti-alpha on that sugma gindset Certified Grimace milker Consciously adopting a positive perspective Masterful Gambit Sir
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Seeing JK speak about woman-hood like a curse shows she doesn't see being a woman as something to be proud of, or desire But something to resent No wonder she "hates" Trans women more-so They openly express what she hates most, with complete joy no less Screams James Potter bullying young Snape
it really doesn’t matter if someone is in america illegally or not. who cares, grow up
nobody ever lets me piss in their mouth :(
Does anyone remember a few years ago The Times had a headline something like "636 trans women in UK prisons for sex crimes" and then it turned out they had just assumed all women in prison for rape were trans based upon nothing, and then they quietly retracted it? Can anyone remember the article?
Nazuna
Making video games is (very) hard work.
The Gaza "war" ???
#BookSky
This is exclusionary against all non-wars!
War is bad.
Summer time 🏖️
The way that guy said, "Were you jus' doing your jaahhhhbb???" 💀
New Yorkers scream out each officer’s lawsuits against them for excessive force and more upon their city, right to their faces while protesting.
FBI Warns Second California Senator Still At Large theonion.com/fbi-war...
History will not be kind to Speaker Johnson. Nor should it be.
Here’s a video of Stephen Miller in high school screaming that he’s “sick and tired of being told to pick up my trash, when we have plenty of janitors who are paid to do it for us.” This is the sociopath shaping our immigration policy and so much more
This is good advice!
We’ve uncovered fraud, waste, and abuse! ICE has now exceeded its congressionally approved budget. ICE is violating the Antideficiency Act by spending beyond Congressional authorization.
Good morning welcome to Tippetty tap tap Thursday You weren’t made to blend in — you were made to belong, just as you are. Belonging isn’t about fitting the shape of others. It’s about being seen, just as you are
You can totally de-arrest your friends, even in the US.
Haze. 🌞
Musk Weighs Return To Politics After 60th Death On ‘Elden Ring Nightreign’ Tutorial theonion.com/musk-we...
When The Onion writers quit and go work for Disney
The grasshopper gets it — divide and conquer. Today’s robber barons use the same playbook. But together, we have all the power. Watch.
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Who is appreciating what now?
headline construction masterclass
Choking my ChÏbìs
the way god intended
Wise Oracle Proclaims To All At Barbecue That He Felt A Raindrop theonion.com/wise-or...
the thing about embarrassing yourself is that it IS the end of the world and you SHOULD have a public meltdown over it
Good morning✌️🍀
zionist politicians love being like “i endorse committing war crimes and assassinating american citizens ❤️”
i don’t have a gender but if I did it can best be explained by this video
He passed out after failing to open that bag of food.
🤣🤣
A clowns nards should be called jesticles
Marriage becomes invalid when we are populating Mars with superior, Ketamine addicted little shits
Hasn't this guy ever been to a guttural moaning seminar before? CUMbaya ma'lord!! CUMBAYA!!
when your girlfriend cums and your first thought is that she didn't learn that from you
the fact that this does not say "ex boyfriend" is insane to me
You could all stand to be a little more cunty
At this rate, gay people are going to act homophobic just for kicks
the developer of your favorite game isn't conspiring against you to make you have no fun while playing it. you just need cognitive behavioral therapy
Oh, look, this Cybertruck got the aftermarket Roman customization package.
pride month is over
men have moved beyond thinking it's gay to wash your ass, they now think it's gay to touch water at all
happy pride to all the little gay people in my phone
every company from june 1st until june 30th
“We’re not in love with the law” is a pretty good motto for this group
Still out here sketching.
Nice shirt!! 😂 Correct answer: d
Looks like he's got some plans. Not good ones.
Dr. Who is a terrifying premise. Don't like the idea of an alien that can go any where any time but still chooses to mostly hang out with the British.
Hepeating and he never got invited back…
🍜らくがき
THESE are the tattoos we should be worried about… Valknut: historically Norse, used by some white supremacist and neo-Nazi groups.
My autism was mislabeled as... #latediagnosedautistic
So Do I! We All Should!!
Now more than ever
We live in clown time
"Sorry bud, I can't stop cutting off your fingers while you hang onto the edge of this cliff - painfully leading to your certain doom - because you will die in your sleep anyways in like 70 years."
Joni Ernst, at her town hall last night. When the crowd said people will die due to Medicaid and SNAP cuts, she said: "well we all are going to die." 🫠🫠🫠🫠
you gotta be faster
how it sounds arguing with die hard capitalists.
Hair Loss: Myth Vs. Fact theonion.com/hair-lo...
Musk should be asked about this in every interview he does now and forever. To ignore it is a dereliction of duty. www.nytimes.com/2025/05/30/o...
logging on
A Southern elephant seal makes a surprise visit to the residential neighborhood of Gordon's Bay in Cape Town, South Africa, and triggers an almost nine-hour rescue effort to return him to the coast.
quick question: wtf
You can’t be “addicted” to a human right.
Scoop: Texas police used Flock's license plate cameras to search *nationwide* for a woman who had a self-managed abortion. Claim it was "about her safety" www.404media.co/a-texas-cop-...
From The Archives: I Don’t Vaccinate My Child Because It’s My Right To Decide What Eliminated Diseases Come Roaring Back theonion.com/i-don-t...
Haven't seen anyone say it so clearly as the reality like this
Whoever made this deserves a medal.
The war on science and expertise is now in full swing.
private equity taking over and immediately creating Discorb, the real life texting micro transaction that everyone will hate, is a little too on the nose
Just a few of the random thoughts that bounce around in my brain. . . 🧠