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Topher Lane

@topherlane.bsky.social

Snark is my love language. Educator, filmmaker, and writer. Fierce ally to women, LGBTQIA+, and animals! Colorado dude.

created November 10, 2024

532 followers 1,471 following 371 posts

view profile on Bluesky

Posts

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

President Donald Trump confirmed crimes against humanity were committed under his direct order by carrying out deadly U.S. military action against Venezuelan cartel suspects in the Caribbean Sea.

3/9/2025, 1:09:47 AM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Allllll of this!!!

1/9/2025, 3:38:20 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

tl:dr - If the Covid vaccine really worked I want all the credit, if not I want all the credit for exposing it.

1/9/2025, 1:39:52 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

When the announcement is made, I’m going to…

1/9/2025, 1:50:23 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

31/8/2025, 1:56:50 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Real question… When will we finally have a coed professional sports league? I would freaking love to watch coed soccer or basketball or hockey or volleyball. I know mixed doubles exists, but I want a full on, league based sport that is coed!

30/8/2025, 6:37:34 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Have you been in a Walgreens in the last 10 years? I don’t know how you would know if it’s “being run into the ground” when every store always looks like a war zone already.

30/8/2025, 4:41:01 PM | 31 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Or leaving 🍊💩ler in charge of a teen beauty pageant.

29/8/2025, 1:29:23 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

May her grave be blessed with fecal tributes on a daily basis.

28/8/2025, 10:34:41 PM | 13 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

What if, and hear me out, Taylor bought his shitty company and fired him?

27/8/2025, 1:29:37 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Weren’t these the things they railed against?

image
27/8/2025, 1:27:43 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Yeah, that’s…that’s a different thread, my guy.

27/8/2025, 1:24:37 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Yep, ain’t no damn lakes in LA!

27/8/2025, 1:22:57 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Can the congestive heart failure please work faster?

26/8/2025, 11:35:17 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

I demand the Utah Jazz move back to New Orleans because there is no fucking jazz in Utah!

Original New Orleans Jazz basketball team logo
26/8/2025, 11:33:43 PM | 22 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Garbage collectors don’t pick up litter 🤷‍♂️

26/8/2025, 11:29:48 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

At least they are doing something that is actually useful! You know, instead of civil rights violations and such.

26/8/2025, 11:28:58 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

How about we all try “loud as fuck cracking”? Just start wailing in every meeting, cry all day, bitch loudly about not being paid enough so everyone in the cube farm can hear you! Go full-fucking-toddler until we break their minds!

25/8/2025, 1:11:54 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

It’s as if he is trying for “the greatest depression”

8/8/2025, 1:04:47 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

I agree completely, but they jailed Al Capone for tax evasion and not all the mob shit. If this works, it works.

8/8/2025, 12:59:44 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

I love this idea. Watch all the southern, Republican held states shed population totals by the shed load! 🤣

8/8/2025, 1:01:46 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Cause of course they fucking did! The party of trump ALWAYS lies.

8/8/2025, 12:00:51 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

“Viagra Falls”

7/8/2025, 2:12:18 AM | 35 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

What? He lied???

4/8/2025, 2:15:34 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Maybe all the democrats should flee to a country that values democracy. You know, like all those republicans who whet to mother Russia on July 4th to embrace their descent into dictatorship?

3/8/2025, 8:57:56 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

As soon as they started pledging pro bono work to him, the entire profession went into the depths of hell

3/8/2025, 8:54:52 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Clearly, he has never used a flashlight 🔦

31/7/2025, 2:03:09 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Do the “poop-in-a-box” test annually. It can detect problems far earlier than a colonoscopy every five years.

28/7/2025, 4:32:11 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Do it. With camera rolling. In prime time. And let him expose EVERYTHING he knows as his “deathbed confession”!

28/7/2025, 4:30:08 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Look at that, the mob boss in chief delivered after his blatant threat was heeded.

24/7/2025, 10:21:13 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

When ANYONE wants to hold hands a pray at the dinner table? Nope! Imma eat my food quietly and y’all can do your thing, but I have NO obligation to participate in YOUR religious activities.

22/7/2025, 9:20:08 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Reaching out to say, “If you forget everything you know and burn any records, we’ll get you out of prison. If not, maybe you get to see Jeffrey again real soon” like any good mob boss does, through his consigliere.

22/7/2025, 7:57:43 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Where else would the white supremacists in government turn for their AI needs?

15/7/2025, 1:32:46 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Now is when she should release EVERYTHING she has on EVERYONE who was involved. She is going to die in prison one way or another, she has absolutely nothing to lose.

14/7/2025, 11:52:50 PM | 3 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Way to be well behind the headlines on this one, Chucky. Maybe you can send a strongly worded letter or change the name of a bill instead of doing literally anything useful. Retire. For all of us.

14/7/2025, 11:50:30 PM | 14 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

It’s funny that he thinks that schools would receive the same funds with fewer students enrolled. They are comically stupid and fully evil.

12/7/2025, 12:41:22 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Next up, they are going to file lawsuits against mirrors and scales.

11/7/2025, 1:21:10 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

11/7/2025, 12:25:12 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Anyone still on that hellsite is implicitly supporting this. Fuck the “followers”, fuck the “reach”, fuck it all and shut down the accounts, or own you part in supporting this.

10/7/2025, 1:52:01 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Would love nothing more in life than to see him and his family arrested by his masked goons, thrown into an unmarked van, and placed into one of those kennels in the swamps.

10/7/2025, 1:42:38 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

You are right, it’s not hard to do. It is tedious and the absolute perfect thing that AI should be applied to handle automatically.

10/7/2025, 1:39:34 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

9/7/2025, 10:19:24 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

They were the better team. Nice that they were able to win in front of a home crowd.

7/7/2025, 1:09:27 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Seems like the answer is white on the tip of everyone’s tongue 🤔

7/7/2025, 12:24:41 AM | 8 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Man, I’m watching the CONCACAF Gold Cup Final between the US and Mexico, and most of the crowd is behind Mexico. Wouldn’t it be nice if the #USMNT could play as the home team at games on US soil for once? Do better and engage your fans and you might experience that one day! The #USWNT always do!

6/7/2025, 11:42:49 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Love me some shrimp pork and I live in Cornolrado!

6/7/2025, 8:20:40 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Trumptastrophes

6/7/2025, 5:16:26 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Just like how the Nazis sent children to Auschwitz, the unbelievable horror is the point.

5/7/2025, 1:07:58 PM | 4 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

States should withhold all federal taxes until they pay.

2/7/2025, 9:17:23 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Just sittin’ here crying in my coffee now 🥲

29/6/2025, 12:48:26 PM | 11 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Has anyone asked him if he can define a woman?

27/6/2025, 3:45:44 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

24/6/2025, 1:20:42 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Jose Padilla is the new Four Seasons Landscaping

21/6/2025, 1:22:20 AM | 3 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Yeah, that’s pretty pathetic to have an account with ZERO posts or engagement

21/6/2025, 12:46:10 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Do they all wear unnatural levels of eyeliner like JD?

21/6/2025, 12:43:56 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

He wants to do to see the “big boom cloud” more than anything

19/6/2025, 11:04:02 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

As soon as he started, they should have either turned around or walked for the exit. The team does not have the right to force them to be props like this.

19/6/2025, 9:31:56 PM | 1 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

If this goes through, asbestos should be immediately installed in every Republicans office without their consent.

19/6/2025, 9:29:27 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

We learned about it in Texas history class because it was essentially a semiofficial state holiday. I never met anyone from another state who learned about it until the last decade or so.

19/6/2025, 2:41:49 PM | 5 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

He will cause generational death, illness and misery with his fantasy based decisions.

19/6/2025, 2:38:09 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Yep, it’s a place where people value honest dialogue and accountability. So it's only fitting that you're here, where your record and rhetoric can be met with the thoughtful scrutiny they deserve. Can’t wait to see how your idea of “common sense” holds up in an environment less curated for applause.

19/6/2025, 1:25:10 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

18/6/2025, 1:20:13 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

17/6/2025, 11:18:47 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

17/6/2025, 10:56:42 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

I’m m sorry, but this is Wendy’s

17/6/2025, 8:26:36 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

How much did “the church” pay for Tommy’s Oscar? It’s like McDonalds being awarded an honorary Michelin Star because of the number of burgers they have sold.

17/6/2025, 7:07:50 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

This is how I imagine she would have dressed up if she had been invited

image
17/6/2025, 7:03:33 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

No idea, but since laws no longer matter and the rules are all made up, I say go for it.

17/6/2025, 6:35:31 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Hope the states use Eminent Domain and let claim to it before the sale.

17/6/2025, 4:50:14 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Gotta show off his big boy signature to the cameras.

16/6/2025, 11:15:51 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

It’s amazing that he has launched a hundred money making grifts in office, but still only has an “idea of a healthcare plan”

16/6/2025, 12:57:43 PM | 8 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Mike Johnson looking at that sign would trigger a porn alert to his son

15/6/2025, 11:07:52 PM | 5 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

This it the 10 year anniversary of my stroke. I’m glad he survived and I hope he continues to live a great life.

15/6/2025, 7:57:57 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

“Today’s military parade provided by Wish.”

15/6/2025, 1:22:42 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

All that empty grass to orange shitler…

15/6/2025, 1:15:18 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

All those empty bleachers to dear leader…

15/6/2025, 1:12:34 AM | 9 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

14/6/2025, 4:51:48 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Are you trying to crowdfund for said treatment, because I’m in!

11/6/2025, 12:54:26 PM | 1 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Holy hell! The #USMNT are once again putting on an absolute travesty of a performance, this time against Switzerland. 4-0 after 35 minutes is garbage. We have got to get it sorted. No way is this team # 16 in the world.

11/6/2025, 12:43:30 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Wow. After all of Ronaldo’s bitching about this Ballon d’Or the week, he isn’t even the number one choice for boos in the #UEFALeagueFinals Cucurella is the clear fan favorite there 🤣

8/6/2025, 7:25:28 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Again, I am not willing to give them a pass. They have consistently underperformed, full squad or not. As a fan, I demand better of them for all the quality they have to pull from.

7/6/2025, 11:02:30 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

As long as they are wearing that uniform, they are “real players”. They have to do better. That was garbage, and I’m not going to offer or accept excuses for it.

7/6/2025, 9:58:53 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Another absolutely middling performance by the #USMNT against Turkey. 2-1 loss after scoring a ripping goal 60 seconds in. This is the most underperforming team of all time!

7/6/2025, 9:39:44 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Anybody else see this video expecting to see Ukrainian drones to start blowing the tanks up?

7/6/2025, 6:28:41 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

7/6/2025, 4:00:59 PM | 2 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Musk is listed as 6’2” and 🍊💩let claims to be 6’3”? 😬🤥😬

6/6/2025, 9:18:03 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

They should never be allowed in leadership positions because of it.

6/6/2025, 9:14:16 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

So much drama!!!

image
6/6/2025, 2:43:56 PM | 8 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Anyone who still own a Tesla at this point 100% knows what is coming.

5/6/2025, 11:22:38 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

5/6/2025, 11:21:07 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

So Musk supported a known pedophile and Trump supported a known illegal alien? How weird.

5/6/2025, 11:20:30 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

We got rid of ours in January and we could not be happier. Bought it in ‘19, but we have two other EVs now

5/6/2025, 9:23:46 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social)

Y’all, this entirely predictable mess between Orange Shitler and Elonia Muskrat is the absolute lifeblood that I needed today!

5/6/2025, 9:17:36 PM | 1 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

He is an apartheid douche nozzle. He will not join us.

5/6/2025, 8:16:19 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

5/6/2025, 8:15:23 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

It’s so good

5/6/2025, 8:14:31 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

How long until he cuts off all of Muskrat’s government contracts and subsidies?

5/6/2025, 4:03:47 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

All he did was claim repeatedly that he had absolute PROOF that fraud was committed. That is a little different than “talking”.

4/6/2025, 2:16:50 AM | 10 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

Isn’t it nice when a men tells every woman he knows exactly what kind of macho asshole piece of shit he is? Just selflessly tearing away any and all pretense and putting it right out there so all women know exactly who and what he is.

1/6/2025, 10:47:57 PM | 17 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Topher Lane (@topherlane.bsky.social) reply parent

1/6/2025, 6:59:07 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view