Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Before tonight I did not know how bad one would have to fuck up to get 250 rushing yards out of a Mumme protege.
Grandson of slain Game Warden Bill Pogue. Veteran of Afghanistan and Iraq. Featured in Jake Tapper's THE OUTPOST: AN UNTOLD STORY OF VALOR. Combat Action Badge. Disabled vet. Father of four. Fears no coward. Go Cubs
981 followers 546 following 2,117 posts
view profile on Bluesky Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Before tonight I did not know how bad one would have to fuck up to get 250 rushing yards out of a Mumme protege.
No Escalators (@noescalators.bsky.social) reposted
Bill Belichick thinks 48-14 is unacceptable. Lucky for him the teams didn’t score one more touchdown each because 55-21 would be a healthy adult relationship.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Fuck it. Hire Phil Jackson to coach your football team, Duke. This is a brave new world. Step boldly.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
...But Alabama has a football team. Might not be a good one, but it definitely is one. North Carolina is taking "basketball school" to new exciting places
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Danielle, infamous Current fan ︽✵︽ (@likethe309.bsky.social) reposted
This is extremely funny to me
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
The North Carolina radio team is giving constant, AND I MEAN CONSTANT, clock updates. They are not enjoying their jobs this evening
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Page 88 of Bill's Big College Football Glow Up Manifesto says you can't be mad, tar heels. Please clap.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Lol
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
*There is still a quarter to go.*
Holly Anderson 🍇 (@hollyanderson.bsky.social) reposted
[dad standing on screen porch observing thunderstorm] we needed this
Craig Calcaterra (@craigcalcaterra.bsky.social) reposted
Jordan Hudson and Bill Belichick later tonight.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Will TCU burn a redshirt just to really rub it in?
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
It's grim rubbernecking, but when will anyone get a chance to see something go so badly (on purpose? This seems to have been the plan?) again?
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
North Carolina looks much much worse than Boise State and that is not an endorsement of Boise State's skill at football in any way, shape, or form. Woof
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I got good news, Coach
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
As far as I can tell, Christian Jacobs turned his clout into actual friendship with Mark Mothersbaugh and then used that friendship to sell a show where he could excuse getting paid to hang out together, and that is the correct way to cash in the chips life gives you
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
My god bunchanumbers racing, my favorite team
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Every online race gonna be a Dick Trickle DieHard 500 Simulator. Wrecking myself, driving around on a rim, car on fire, skipping pit row for reasons unclear to myself or the pace car catching up to me. Pretty stoked.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Allen Bitterbuck's execution is the best part of The Green Mile, as weird as that is to type. Everything in that movie hinges and hangs on that sequence of scenes. Man, he was great.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
:(
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Done damn deal
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
I have seen this exact double get hit more times in my life than I can count. He's crazy good
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I'm gonna end up buying NASCAR 25 on my Xbox because of you fuckers, smh
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Look at these posers acting like they don't spend all their time making fun of Boise State for starting as a blue collar school.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I watch the famous YouTube NASCAR people and watching them try to explain but then give up is pretty fun since it makes me feel good in my ignorance. But I do know about the Matt Kenseth rule now
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Seems kinda fucked up to transport him around in the presidential hearse
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Stand in large part due to
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Post-WWI, the wheel on the stamp became a clock face. The Komotau factory was built in 1890, so it isn't older than that. It's likely from closer to 1910, but serial numbers are no help for Kienzels, so some things will remain a mystery.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
That logo is a stylized wheel and wings of mercury. This clock was made at their secondary factory of Komotau, in Bohemia. We know this because Komotau moved the non-stylzed Mercury and the wheel to the pendulum, which this clock has. Pretty awesome.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
About to start repairing a real old wall clock. How old? Well, according to the stamp on the back, it's a Kienzel from between 1890-1910. It is not rare, they were the most prolific clock makers in Germany. Post-1910 clocks have KIENZEL as part of this stamped logo. But wait, there's more
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Chris, the lead singer of Empire Dropouts, is a cool dude. Must chill human ever created when not raging onstage.
John Cullen (@nellucnhoj.bsky.social) reposted
"Bluesky is dying" Oh yeah? Then explain why this GIF always does numbers.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
They're gonna find little pieces of Boise State's corpse on the moon after the Notre Dame game :(
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
I DON'T WANT ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THE TABLES
Etrigan (@etrigan.bsky.social) reposted
“Upon further review, the play was sick as fuck.”
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
The next person to open the disco room door after I tripped in there earlier:
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
As an outsider who has never been there, this is the most treasured long-running tradition New Yorkers have. Seattle had it for a while too, but it ironically moved to Portland
The Gurgling Cod (he/him) (@thegurglingcod.bsky.social) reposted
Boise State volleyball player Nora Hayd has been called a "Gothlete." This implies the existence of Gothletic directors, which is now the job I want. www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic...
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Pearl Jam - Do the Evolution Peter Gabriel - Sledgehammer Doomtree - Beacon Missy Elliot - The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I have no doubt he's alive so how is he so bad at acting like he's currently right now alive?!?
Marisa Kabas (@marisakabas.bsky.social) reposted
Must be Gruden’s favorite golf outfit since he wore it last week at Trump’s club in Virginia.
Andrew Lawrence (@ndrew.bsky.social) reposted
rip to everyone whos become delusional after talking to chatgpt but im built different. like actually different. according to chatgpt im some kind of god. the one who decides
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Resurrect Dead: The Mystery of the Toynbee Tiles is on YouTube. Link in the follow-on post, just think the cover sells it well.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Finally, the best version of Why Go, original included
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
It's Jake's stealth covers thread within Porksweats' covers thread! It's just two songs. First, J-Punk.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Fucking love the Rollo and Sister Bliss remix youtu.be/GGsilBQpeVY?...
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
"How did Boise State do in their game?"
BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL (@edsbs.bsky.social) reposted
To make it clear, a catch begins sometime in the Cretaceous period, where it dies, is covered by sediment, and slowly becomes a part of the geological strata, overtime compression and gravity, transform it into a semi-catch, which over millions of years will one day solidify into a full catch
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
LSU fans gonna go full FSU for a week if they lose because of that
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Five lifelong B2B Sales Lessons from Week 1
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
He's smooth (feat. Rob Thomas)
Hyperlexic (@hyperlexic.bsky.social) reposted
They’re doing all this to prevent people from MEMORIALIZING A MASS SHOOTING
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
So after Bill Buckner did the thing he's remembered for, he came out to Idaho and opened a car dealership in a place called Emmett, a place he spent the rest of his life. Congratulations, Emmett on getting yourself a new DeBoer Ford dealership
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Coaching the next game from witness protection somewhere in Indiana
Patrick Valentine (@koushiroizumi.bsky.social) reposted
Lucy Rohden (@lucyrohden.bsky.social) reposted
This is the best sport in the world
Brendel (@brendelbored.bsky.social) reposted
Deeply fascinated by the new wave band Trent Reznor used to play with in the 1980’s and how everyone looks so incredibly 80’s except for Trent Reznor who looks exactly the same as he always has to the point where he might as well have time traveled
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Bama looks better than Boise, they've got that going for them I guess.
Matt C. Shoot (@confirmedshoot.latenightgrin.com) reposted
Ryan Day having 6 straight wins against AP Top 5 teams is fucking hilarious
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Okoyesque
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Listening to music in the rose garden with the president of the United States Donald j Trump, who is definitely rocking out with me just out of frame
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Now see this suddenly feels dumb enough to be real
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I've come to cut your funds!
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
He hasn't been seen by anyone in the past two days and his press office just put out that he has no public appearances at all before at least Tuesday. And so the people (me, I'm the people) find hope
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Solid damn answer
Mikey in DFW (@mdwdfw.bsky.social) reposted
GEORGIA TECH WINS THE 1990 NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP!!!
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Mark Morhersbaugh giving doodling lessons in Yo Gabba Gabba
Holly Anderson 🍇 (@hollyanderson.bsky.social) reposted
Actually I was wondering
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I'm imagining prime just standing their mumbling "these nerds have hands" to himself in utter disbelief
Evan Sutton (@evansutton.bsky.social) reposted
JD Vance is a skin-suit for Peter Thiel. Thiel has been sewing him together for years, grooming him, preparing this empty husk for the moment when Thiel could step into it and run the world.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Why do the young die so soon
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
This is some incredible failing up, holy shit
Kickback Committee (@kickbackcommittee.bsky.social) reposted
🚨 Delivery Notice! Idaho scouting report is in.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Information is a virus 💕
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Like those one. Scott done fucked up real bad. youtu.be/cq01YsE2GYc?...
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
Wonder why they'd fly a plane begging people to move? You should definitely search YouTube for "Florida housing market" lol.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I love you, Mom
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
There are a lot of elected Congress-rats very excited to find someone to blame for the sinking ship they will be fleeing
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Shit yeah just fill your entire life with little swords of Damocles to keep it spicy
Consumers for Auto Reliability and Safety (@autosafety4all.bsky.social) reposted
Great reporting by @faizsays.bsky.social. Sheds light on heartbreaking tragedy caused in great part by #Tesla on #Autopilot. Bravo to the hacker who finally found telltale video, despite Tesla's claims it was not accessible. TRUTH is powerful when it comes to light. @tesla-takedown.bsky.social
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
But you know what will fix it, Alex? That's right, even older elected officials
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
He'll be the one to bring the affordable eggs, I'm sure of it
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
What a fun awful sentence I get to read today
Jeff Yang (@originalsp.in) reposted reply parent
Worth noting that Yokeley was put in place after NC Republicans seized control of the state elections system and purged its ranks of anyone who refused to embrace “Stop the Steal” denialism
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
The child is merely designed to look like former NBA great Rajon Rondo
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Liz, I think someone is about to learn some hard lessons in the non-fungibility of charisma
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
Strangely enough, Won't Perdue played for Perdue
Super Nintendo Chalmers (@snchalmers.bsky.social) reposted
I fucking despise Chuck Schumer
Chris Kluwe (@chriswarcraft.bsky.social) reposted
Enjoy your Friday!
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social)
And the effects of the tariff stupidity are only this rn:
Boise Autonomous Solidarity Hub (@bigbash.bsky.social) reposted
A similar recent situation out of Boise: Boise PD and Idaho State Police used footage provided by a far right group to target and charge an abortion activist. Three years later, a mistrial is declared when withheld video, apparently, shows battery and instigation by the source's group.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
But boy howdy the Broncos have work to do everywhere. Maybe work on not fumbling the danged football, literally everyone in the backfield
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I don't want him carrying 30 times a game like Jeanty, but I bet Gaines could handle more than 3 carries a quarter. He felt much closer to hitting a home run than Sherrod did. Sherrod to me came off as a third down back confused about participating in these weird mythical first and second downs.
Jacob Whittaker (@vonfunkenstein.bsky.social) reply parent
I don't understand why there was an OR on the depth chart re: Gaines and Sherrod. They did not feel like equals in any way. The box score seems kind to Sherrod, honestly.