*wearily loads rifle*
*wearily loads rifle*
Get a job ya bums
No thanks pal
Tempus fugit, eh bitches?
Speak your German truth
Oh, lonely death on lonely life! Oh, now I feel my topmost greatness lies in my topmost grief.
Admiral Halsey will be devastated
A butter pie?
TRY THE VEAL
GRAB SAND, DICKWEEDS
Yeah it’s a trade. Wise up, poindexters!
I think “posse comitatus” sounds pretty cool actually
Never used
Only if you are AGE VERIFIED
Must be huge relief the scots never got involved in any of that business
Don’t even feel like invading anywhere 😔
My fiends and me hate bad grimoire
PUT ME BACK ON THE BIKE
“Great bunch of lads”?
Patriotmaxxing
I have tattooed flags on the inside of my eyelids so that I even see them when I am sleeping
Urgh can’t see any flags right now. I HATE this
What about MACE?
You luxembastard
An S in Spelling Bee? Weak!
Oh cool you have to burn the house down now
Authentic sausages
Guerrilla documentary of your (highly eventful) life
Take my name and number out of your whore mouth
I wish James Norton would keep his filthy Saxon hands off Edith Swan-neck
I would have it garnished with an entire suckling pig
Trump looks vivacious
I haven't had a flag in hours
I had heard that about you
it would be amusing to see you try
I always sit in front of a Union Jack as I feel it makes my features 'pop'
the stock u take is equal to the stock u make
time to bring in a blairite
there has been a terrible mix up
I have temporarily relaxed my grip on delivery
I am getting a grip on delivery
the ungrateful dead
So happy to be back at work I am smacking myself upside the head with a wireless mouse on a zoom
September Weptember - CRY MY PRETTIES CRY
RUSSIA
So happy to be back at work I could puke
🤔
Can’t believe the woke BBC have put up a trigger warning before episodes of King & Conqueror for people suffering under the Norman Yoke
Once again you have hurt my feeling
Just summoned some fricassee chicken to my private domicile
Haha look at that irreverent still photographer
Replace the Sunday fear, spare the Sunday child
just have a beer m8 #jhabm
I STUDIED THE BLADE
My dog rolled in something unspeakable in Sussex, stunk it up through Kent and now reeks in Essex
Dirty Diana deeds done dirt cheap
The weeks of mawkishness afterwards on all media platforms created the perfect level of boredom that led to the accidental creation of my eldest child
Performatively reading Dan Brown and drinking a can of Monster Energy drink in public
BINS
Good morning I must strongly contradict any rumours that may have been circulating vis a vis me not waking up
Just being annoying in the liminal spaces like they told me to
Oof. Forewarned is forearmed old son
Happy Skynet Day to all who celebrate
The only way I voluntarily go to a doctor will be like the end of Carlitos Way but well played old so.
Zabadak?
Haha just got the work fear real bad #friyay
These goddamned guys man
this is going to be fine
or those nerds talking about ghostbusters
You are correct though. Picking something from our collection of tote bags is like playing Russian roulette with both my comfort and dignity
That would have been a decent house down-payment in 2010
It made you the strong resilient girl you now are
Daniel has turned his gimlet eye on another modern menace
Pre ‘86(?) when cane/slipper etc were banned
This sounds like a lie but isn't. Schools are weird places
the other thing that stopped before I got there and which I am grateful for missing was the practice of having to do a round in the boxing ring with the RE teacher if you annoyed him enough. He seemed incredibly wet but had been an army Featherweight champ
the classic first year project was smelting and casting the base of a lamp. Weird Kent experiment of technical schooling that had become a standard grammar in the mid 80s when I went. Very extensive metalwork facilities
The White Heat of the technological revolution clearly requires children to master the forge
Technical High School/Grammar (just post official end of corporal punishment): holding piece of chalk between nose and wall metre ruler 'pinged' into back of head standing on one leg on the science lab benches cleaning out the school forge
Hey boss I designed that sheep numbering system real fuckin sexy just like you asked
BUMFIT
just behind the next cotton candy cloud
Dear god
Get a job ya bum
Tl;dr
‘Oo remembers our skeumorphic youth?
Just seen a season one Girls episode and the original iOS icons seem WILD now
Never fear! They have an endless supply of racist children
Totes Yummers
Cracking the ‘fish’ cypher on the bombes at Bletchley
Easy for you to say
Should have taken a picture of the (virginal) five mini roundabouts in one we had to cross to get here
I am in the People’s Republic of Wivenhoe where there is some intra union flag beef going on
I will catch up with this and send you a carefully selected emoji
Urgh I am being deported back to Kent for spraying the WuTang symbol on the castle
autumn's roadies are on the stage
I have become radicalised after spending years painting the Breton flag on roads and nobody noticed
right, these roundabouts aren't just going to daub themselves
