ew fuck off get a life loser
Writer, millennial, certified baby whisperer. My phone has been on silent since 2011 and everyone can just deal with it. What Would Jim Larkin Do? sports alt: https://bsky.app/profile/robadelphia.gobirds.online
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ew fuck off get a life loser
jerry no
shoulda gone with full-time bangs
siri iceland iceland siri
we don’t know that chris maybe it’s just that i’m a millennial and never had anything to hoard
telling others to lay off the booze when your team is literally the brewers
i’d be like that one dude who got drafted and immediately retired like what are we doing here
bridget jones’s gary
delete delete
something something anal bleeds
SECRET SERVICE: earlier today a post was made from your account saying "is this the day trump dies on a toilet" did you write that ME: yup SS: ME: SS: ME: oh my god shut up
mfer said gotten
how dare you does the RH stand for Really Hwrong gotten
may ben shapiro step on a lego (i’m doing my part)
don’t you alt text me
Bluesky every day:
no no i’m also against community building everyone leave me alone
gotdang cheeto in the white house
queenest of shit
don’t assault me for my preferences ok i have rights
😭
pro-candy, don’t get it twisted just not rly pro-scary stuff
why is my nickname not big salsa all i want for christmas is my nickname to be big salsa
(risky) i’m not really into halloween
the ass of fate is what i call myself
you really are your mother’s son
thanks for following you’re muted
everyone should be this kind to themselves that’s what i say
how dare a non-follower speak to me in this way
yeah and that fan is your mom boom goes the you’remyson
my butt: manosphere me: a manosopher
my onlyfans currently 40 percent off
the manosphere is what i call my butt
😭
i’ll get a matching tattoo where they touched my butt
no duck lips what is this AI
pretty jealous of people with the addicted-to-working-out coping mechanisms, like at least you’re hot i’m stuck with the would-rather-sit-here-than-flee-a-fire disorder
more to the point northern delaware is a surprisingly interesting mix of people. i do consider it part of the nation of philadelphia but you don’t get native hoagiemouth here, at least not away from the border
i’m not even joking it can get southern in a hurry you would be surprised no you’re not going to mistake them for mississippians but they sure as hell aint city folk
first of all if i drive five minutes south or west banjos start playing
that’s just not true and frankly is an attack not only on delaware but on america
that born in the 50s and 60s northeast philly is just down the reauxd montco
my aunts and uncles are mint condition montco tho
i left montco for delwear in 99 idk what i sound like, just some generic east coaster
- buy puppy - leave it on neighbor’s doorstep - ask neighbor if you can play with their new puppy
no true alf hog
bottom text be like “juicy”
something something unity something join our colleagues across the aisle
but not now obviously bc there’s stuff in my hair
i should take it back to 2001 and buzz my head
the problem with putting stuff in your hair before you run out to do errands is that you come home and now there’s stuff in your hair
apologies for anything i said or did while drinking but also i’m probably gonna do it again all week
i mean, yes, but also the philadelphia phillies have been playing baseball in philadelphia since 1883
how about july 31 2024 what was the number on that date
ice water is a healing elixir
i have a lot of nephews so i can curse them with it
an old friend’s dad is named rob and every time i saw him we’d go hey rob/hey rob and that was pleasant
hey rob
i have this same issue with my own cards i haven’t looked at them in like 20 years and i know they’re mostly worthless but
if bluesky is dying why does everyone keep talking to me i’ve been working night and day to throttle my engagement on here and people are still like “hi rob!” honestly it’s infuriating
only one?
what were the numbers last year?
if you can’t admit harry styles has put out some bangers you need to grow up
is it bad if i just remember him for the diary entry ok but like bad bad or just regular bad
that old chestnut
definitely gonna get powerball tickets today if i subscribe to your onlyfans it means i won
slightly groggy
seems unlikely i showered today
i can’t give advice but for what it’s worth i acknowledge your predicament
are you posting bc you’re worried
i assume anyone who misspells things whilst drunk posting is doing it on purpose
if i close one eye i can see better what does that mean (it means alcohol is what it means)
It’s a little weird to demand people vote for a candidate as a necessary lesser evil three years before you even know if they’re going to be the candidate
i just refrained from posting another asinine comment i should be given a nobel peace prize
i can’t promise anything
often but not always and that’s an important distinction
ngl i am INEBRIATED
in an alternate universe i would teach a college course on this interpretation of beanie babies in this universe i merely don’t know what you mean
my superpower is that i often self-censor even whilst inebriated and frankly you’re welcome
ok i am reveling
this is speciesism
ANIMALS CAN BE BABIES BRYAN
the scene in american beauty where he’s crying about the plastic bag except it’s this post
this is objectively one of my better ideas i mean obviously i can’t be objective but
❌ this site is full of bots ✔️ this site is full of (ro)berts
purchase about 1000 prominent bsky handles and conduct a months-long slow reveal in which everyone discovers that this app is mostly just me talking to myself
ok something is stirring in my mind, it’s possible i’m not into sandalwood? idk maybe i’ll go do some research at the mall
not to be a cishet caricature of a man but i couldn’t articulate a single preference when it comes to perfumes i definitely have preferences i just can’t even imagine them offhand
i don’t give a damn for the whole state of michigan #ally
can you dab some perfume on it like we’re characters in pride and prejudice
no i cannot support that maybe write tyler a nice letter
i’m more of an outervention guy
i did NOT sign up for this
i don’t know what the odds are that the woman flagging down rudy giuliani was actually an inflatable tube man outside a used car dealership but they’re not zero i can tell you that
turns out zombies are allergic to helping women
cars are the worst
the desire to engender suffering remains beyond my comprehension
so glad
“eda-mommies” this better not awaken anything in me
oh idk (probably) i was just having an instinctual reaction to “my don jr”