'ARE YOU THE BOY FROM THE SIXTH SENSE?'
'ARE YOU THE BOY FROM THE SIXTH SENSE?'
I miss the old brand #CDC
I AM YOUR MUSE
Pleased to report I think finally LinkedIn has reached peak up-its-own-arse-ness
“Hey Jim, I’m gonna need one more square block to fill that order. Yeah, yeah, we got all six … remember I told you about that new guy? Got a story for you about him”
There's been one game. And Chelsea played last night so they're top. Otherwise great work.
New episode just dropped
It'll never fit in the toaster.
Replace them with some tights filled with blancmange and an egg. Nobody will know.
Hoping you flee hastily to a hot country but have chosen the ham hand so have no sun cream. Then when the police catch up will you the headline is 'Police find Red Herring'
Don't like shitting if there's someone else in the work toilet. On discovering a locked cubicle door when I enter I will divert to the urinal so it's not a fully wasted trip. To make myself feel better about this I sing 'I'm poo shy shy, hush hush eye to eye' in my head while pissing.
Love Gloss Johnson
Slightly diminish a band: The Heavy Petting Pistols
This bloke's dog shagged another dog and somehow he's turned it into dog wank on LinkedIn.
Doing my tiny bit for humanity by automatically blocking any site that changes 'Says thing' to 'Breaks silence', 'Reveals truth' or 'Confirms real reason'.
'What are you in for?' 'Waving a sign saying blowing up babies is probably a bit wrong' This government is a shower of absolute twattery right now
Dread to think how many I've missed by not signing up for this.
Expected HAL9000, Got ED-209
Taking it next to the level.
Thanks AI, this historical timeline is incredibly useful and will really help my students...😑
I give it two weeks before it starts claiming moat expenses and saying 'Let me be absolutely clear about this'
Yeovil Ninja going to have to retreat further into the shadows. youtu.be/7vgceytHzCI?...
These are the top replies, being financially rewarded for posting this stuff, and the explanation offered by the site’s own AI for why it’s like that. Anyway just flicking through the Sunday newspapers reading about some minor content infractions that Ofcom might look into at the BBC/Channel 4.
Just can't believe that the proposed simple solutions to complex problems continue to fail to pan out. Good news is that it's always somebody else's fault.
Jezbollah. Can't see anyone taking issue with that.
What if they strapped a bomb to a baby though?
'Wrong Message Here'
Drunk Yoda on the traffic signs today
50 years since Rocky Horror Picture Show hit cinemas, Why not celebrate with a complete set of HappyToast RHPS prints? 5 A5 for £25 inc p&p. Only 5 sets available, DM me. www.theguardian.com/film/2025/ju...
Your ball really did swell didn't it?
Sausage_Capri is entirely on message
I'm now at the point where I repeat 'Russia Russia Russia' to the tune of' Gimme Gimme Gimme a Man after Midnight'
The Goonies bill passed with ease I seem to recall.
If you've worked in Scotland then that's practically a degree in knowing the Scottish.
He makes a Gaywood style coffee at the beginning and I was in from that point.
I watched The Amateur last night and it's basically what would happen if someone stole @penllawen.favrd.social 's meat thermometer.
Just showed Bluesky my face for age verification and it asked if I had drank from the wrong grail. Rude.
I feel like the imbecile I am now.
The politics understander is here to explain everything. Phew.
'I've got 104 missiles'
Read the letter, thought 'That's lovely' then the penny dropped and I thought 'Lovely, but sticky'
Needs a never ending series of smaller ants riding on the shoulders of the ants in front holding onto the handlebar antenna. An Anthill Mob, so to speak.
He also seems surrounded by more yes men and women than previously, so tempering his worst excesses seems less likely.
Peak Bluesky
I've got a wheel and pedals on a stand that folds away and a sofa for my racing seat, that's all I could negotiate with the wife. This is like a Bullseye 'Look at what you could have won' for me.
It's not his worst crime, but he could really use the odd paragraph to break his wall of dribble up a bit.
They should get James Gunn to make the next one. I reckon that will unite everyone on the internet.
When you live such a pious life it's only right God directly intervenes and directs the bullet into an innocent bystander.
'Who remembers neo technofascist surveillance capitalism? What was all that about?'
Great stuff
Give it 5 years and we'll get animated remakes of the live remakes of the animated originals.
These days, if you're a working class man with a direct manner...
As a working class man with a direct manner I'm so glad I was spared the dangerous territory of having a national TV show and earning millions. Lucky escape.
Rhyming 'gem' and 'item' really sets the tone.
I'm not saying the world has been absolutely fucked by right wing lunatics, but actually yes I am.
'Sir, this Epstein bonfire won't go away' 'No problem, let me just throw some petrol on it, that should fix it'
Yeah well you're using words and anyone with a working knowledge of history knows the Nazis also used words. Shame on you.
REPORTER: Yesterday you said you were not sure who ordered the munitions ordered to Ukraine. Have you figured it out? TRUMP: I haven't though about it REPORTER: What does it say that such a decision could be made without you knowing? TRUMP: I would know. If a decision was made I will know.
Don't think I've ever recovered from my progeny asking about something that happened to me in the 1990s by preceding it with 'You know in the olden days..'
There's a vacancy at MasterChef I think you'd be perfect for.
'Fear not Humans, I am wiv da angles now, not even touched any of them yet'
It’s not grok’s *worst* offence (by quite some margin), but its quality of writing is dire. Just the most grating faux-edginess imaginable. It’s like if a writers’ room full of evangelical christians tried to write a drug dealer character for a public awareness film.
Grok4 is just going to compose Hitler fan art 24/7
Look, there's an easy, cost efficient way to fix all this that was predicted a while back.
What may actually undermine Trump in the end will be his underlings inability to carry off his very specific style of bullshit.
I reckon it's Big Snooker trying to take you down.
The standard of discourse in the Trump era is worthy of Oscar Wilde
Only thing I ever really use the Hey Google thing for is setting cooking timers. Recently it's adopted a tone like it's a toddler that's done a successful poo in the potty. '*I've* set a timer for 15 minutes' Well done you.
I like how this couldn't be any more wrong. It lists all the tracks that aren't in it and none of the tracks that actually are. GO GO AI.
Stop using it. Stop using it. Stop using it. It doesn’t work.
America now being run by Alan Rickman's Sheriff of Nottingham.
'Everyone has access to oxygen'
'Ken Dodd just got found guilty of transportation for prostitution' 'Did he?' 'Oh yeah, that's who I meant'
I knew him well and the whole arrest thing, but somehow still didn't put the two together. My mate has never let me live that one down. Which is fair.
That makes me feel conaoderably better. Now please also tell me you didn't realise Not Now James, We're Busy was about James Brown until a friend said it in passing.
Knowing the song but not the esteemed Mr Moore's work, I told people with great confidence that he read out the football scores for *way* too long. Considering Def Con One I don't think I could be more ashamed.
I'd say 'total bummer' but then I'd end up with a PG rating
The longer the quote, the taller the Gandhi.
President Karen
Nailed it...
DocuSigh
Dog's just wanked itself off so hard it has fully deflated.
At some point a 'Big Beautiful Death Star' is going to be announced and Republicans will back it to the hilt while Democrats organise a stunning leaflet campaign.
It's not like the most comically evil villain in cinematic history foreshadowed it
Sequel : ZOMBIE MUM: 'How long does this summer holiday last?'
A moment of honest-to-god genius from two years ago, which came to me with no identifying label as to the perpetrator. If you're out there, please identify yourself so I can a. give due credit and b. applaud you roundly for what was referred to back then as "The Final Boss of Dad Jokes"
Not sure about the gender swapped Fleabag follow up.
I had to turn it off when he began the chant about 'Death to the white-trousered morons' Also on researching this for accuracy, Google AI absolutely nailed it
It's not like '2 get U through' would have made WAY MORE SENSE or anything.
I was intrigued as to what Tommy Cannon would be like at the Hull one, having grown up watching them on a Saturday night and he was great value. Following Bob Mortimer seems almost impossible but it played out funny, interesting and poignant. It's the ones that surprise me I like best, ie Mark Addy.
