I once again find myself explaining to my husband the baseball concept of being “half a game back”.
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I once again find myself explaining to my husband the baseball concept of being “half a game back”.
Every night this dog eats dinner, then goes outside into the backyard and gets a pear off the pear tree to bring inside and eat on the bed. Like dessert. I love her dork ass.
Observe my shocked face.
I was going to take a picture of my lunch, burrata with fresh basil, olive oil, balsamic reduction with prosciutto and rounds of bread soaked in butter and olive oil before broiled crispy, but I forgot and just ate it.
I watched a documentary about how a pair of screen worn ruby slippers were stolen from the Judy Garland museum in Grand Rapids, MN, and at one point I apparently lost every bit of my knowledge and connection with reality because I said, out loud, “Why is everyone in this documentary gay?”
I’m re-reading an old Nora Roberts romance and editing it in my head as I read, which is my brain telling me it’s time to go write something again, but I promised my family I’d do the laundry and catch up on housework first, my brain doesn’t seem to care.
The kids are all right.
The midwestern sound I just let out
I once pronounced façade as “fah-cade” because how the fuck would I know and my dad laughed when correcting me and it was 40+ years ago and I still might not be over it.
I just listened to the competence porn episode of fated mates, so I’ve been thinking about this a lot.
Oh, ew.
Ok but like, I need it.
What the fuck?
The new rug for the kiddo’s room should arrive today—the 1st thing I ordered, last to arrive—and that means I might finally soon be done with Operation Middle School Kid’s Room this weekend. Depending on the shelf brackets I need, and if Home Depot truly has them in stock. I’m not holding my breath.
Trying my hand at pork belly on the smoker tonight. Hope it doesn’t go wrong. Set aside some under seasoned pieces for the kid (brown sugar and salt only), hope she eats them. My backup plan is popcorn.
I have, 51 from Michigan
I am in my 52nd year and I find myself doing as my mother did—blaming her farts on the dog.
Every word of that post was wild. WILD.
I have filled out an application to adopt a dog. Because I have nothing better to do than to make work for myself, apparently.
I am mostly unbothered by TS/TK news, but I saw some of the recent New Heights podcast and they seem to have a healthy relationship with their fame/the media and they seem to thoroughly enjoy/respect/get each other and I’m rooting for their HEA.
I bought 10 notebooks for my kid’s school year (among other things) because that’s how many they said she needed, but she also doesn’t have a locker? So she’s going to be schlepping all her school supplies PLUS A LAPTOP around in a backpack all day? I don’t understand your reasoning, Middle School.
I have to go to Walmart the day before school starts. Your thoughts and prayers are appreciated.
lol when I told my kid @ 10ish about how babies were made she was so grossed out and then sad she’d never have kids because she’s certainly never doing THAT so then I explained artificial insemination and IVF and she was like “thank GOD someone thought of a better way!”
When my kid asked “what’s trans?” I said “you have a girls body, do you feel like a girl on the inside?” she said “yes”. I said, “then your outsides match your insides. But some people’s outsides don’t match their insides, and that’s what being trans is”. She said “oh, ok. Can I have ice cream?”
Dinner.
We have also cleaned out—and cleaned the inside of—the fridge. Send all the cocktails.
We washed the dog. Send cocktails.
Yes
Most of the back to school shopping is done, and the kid’s bed is put together so she can sleep in it tonight. These accomplishments bring my week of physical labor to a close. Tomorrow I will be reading and eating and that is all. Maybe I’ll have sex, but only if I don’t have to do any work.
I was going to make baguettes and tomato soup tonight but with bed assembly and back to school shopping on my agenda that’s just not happening. Tomorrow, I guess.
My husband made me stop putting the kids new bed together last night at 9:30 because he said I looked both feral and on the verge of collapse, so I have to finish that today. And also take the child back to school shopping. Wahoo.
It took me like an hour to unpack the kiddo’s new bed and make sure all the parts were there. My hope for having it ready by bedtime dwindles, yet I persist.
I'm done painting the kid's room, but her new bed arrives today, so I'll be putting that together. Then there's the new rug (ordered), new loveseat (ordered), the bookshelves, desk chair, desk lamp (Ikea tomorrow) new school clothes (also tomorrow), and it's all very exciting and exhausting.
I bet this makes cult documentaries look like a Sunday walk in the park.
I had so much blue paint on me yesterday it looked like I murdered a Smurf.
Sing hallelujah I think I’m done painting.
I slept through my hair appointment this morning. Probably because I took two muscle relaxers last night. Also, I forgot I had a hair appointment this morning. Anyway, back to painting. This time I’m doing the trim first, so my arms won’t be dead from 3 hrs of rollering. Trim is hard with dead arms.
Speaking of painting, does anyone have any ideas what I can put around the edges of the ceiling in this child’s room to cover the absolute shit job I’ve done cutting in? Strings of lights, maybe? I’m not above trimming it in fur.
I’ve just got into the tub after a day of painting, and it’s a fair bet I’ll need help to get out again.
OH MY GOD
First coat of new paint is up in the kid's room, minus the trim. I had to take a break for lunch, which was two bell peppers and an ice cream sandwich.
Out Today - Going Deep is the 3rd and final romance in the Odyssey trilogy! books2read.com/u/3yyyKV
This article reminded me of the one and only time I went to an RT Booklovers Con, and the very icky vibes re the cover model contests.
I’m taking a break from painting. It’s all done bit for the upper trim, and that’s just gonna have to wait u til after I eat.
Ok, I went to the recycling center, discovered most of my stuff can’t be recycled, went to the dump IN FLIP FLOPS, did the Costco run (where I lost my receipt buying a slice of pizza for the kid and had to have them print a new one so I’d be allowed to leave) and now I have to paint a bedroom. Help.
How’s my day going? I wore flip flops to the dump, that’s how it’s going.
It’s Paint The Kid’s Room Day and I’m procrastinating.
I wrote an epilogue for the FILTH series, and I can either: 1-keep series in KU, release epilogue as separate title 2-pull series from KU, keep them as individual titles while also releasing them in a box set with epilogue as bonus material 3-do box set from option 2 in KU Which would you do?
uh….what?
I spent all day cleaning my kid’s room and taking apart her old bed and tomorrow I have to take everything off the walls and wash them so I can do primer on Monday and paint on Tuesday and then take her back to school shopping on Wednesday and this is where true love gets you.
Forever by Judy Blume.
I've had a tab open on my laptop with Gordon Ramsay's recipe for scrambled eggs for…I dunno how long, and I'm never going to make these eggs. Because you need a non-stick pot. I don't have a non-stick pot. Non-stick pans, yes, but not a pot. And still, I keep the tab open.
I am not currently writing or editing anything and I sincerely do not know what to do with myself.
But we *can* all agree on it.
This is a beautiful story.
My number one rule when I was dating. That bar is in the basement and you can’t clear it? No. Bye.
Oh, they don’t want to give it to you because they’re sadists who’d rather you have to drink a gallon of lemon pledge that’s lived in the oil pan of a ‘72 Dodge Dart for the last 50 years, but there’s a pill.
I mean, the massive jug of powdered hell is cheap so that’s what they want to give you, but fight for that pill.
My favorite was when he said “you know, it would help if you lose weight” and when I said “oh, is that going to magically make cartilage grow back into my joints?” and my husband burst out laughing they scheduled the surgery.
I feel like the answer is carnations. I don’t know why.
Yeah, that was why they wanted me to wait. And I was like, you see how much ibuprofen I’m taking just to literally walk, you think that’s better? I just want to walk my kid two blocks to the park without needing two days to recover, do the damn surgery.
The prep is by far the worst part. The procedure is just a great nap. When you get around to it, ask for the pill instead of the drink. They’ll fight you on it—god knows why they’d rather you drink a gallon of greasy lemon pledge than give you a pill—but that may help ease your anxiety.
I had both knees replaced at 44. The ortho told me they were so bad I could’ve qualified for disability, then in the same breath advised waiting 15 years to have surgery because I might have to have them redone. Like bro, I’m not looking to run marathons, I literally just want to WALK without pain.
I KNOW! And it had a cute little duck face on it. I'm not okay.
AND I cut my finger on it.
I broke my favorite bowl yesterday. ☹️
In Dolly we trust.
Sometimes my child is my greatest cheerleader: “Mom, if anyone tells you they make Kalua pig better than you, don’t you believe it! Yours is the best!” And sometimes she’s that bitch: “You have really big bags under your eyes, don’t you have makeup?”
Making decisions about the FILTH series today. It's in KU, and I have to decide if I want to keep it there. I'm publishing a series epilogue in Nov, so I want to do a box set for it in e and print, and I'd like both to be available wide, so I'd have to pull it, but… I don't know. I suck at this.
I made a meal my kid actually ate tonight, please applaud.
This is the update, but there’s an in video li k to the first one bsky.app/profile/ingl...
Yes, hang on I found it somewhere…
I saw that after I posted. I do not have the time.
That was my parents’ “song”. I come from weirdos.
A 22 year old author acting a fool, apparently. I dunno.
Do I have time to get into the Audra Winters mess? Do I *want* to get into the Audra Winters mess?
I have done the grocery shopping, cleaned the fridge, dinner is in the oven, lunch is on the stove, the paint swatches are drying on kiddo's wall so we can see which one she likes best, the dishwasher is still dishwashing, it's fucking wild how much I do around here when I'm not on a deadline.
Going Deep, the last book in the Odyssey Trilogy is out next week (Aug 19) and is available now in NetGalley: www.netgalley.com/catalog/book... Go get it!
Sometimes I’m on Reddit and people will post a video of their pets interacting and be all “is this playing or should I stop this?” and I’m like sir, your cat is showing belly and your dog isn’t bleeding, or it’s two pitties and neither is dead, stop making up shit to worry about and go make dinner.
Every year I wonder what I’m going to get, and every year it’s a crap shoot. Sometimes I get these stringy, leggy plants and I don’t know why, sometimes I get this bumper crop where I’ll be making and freezing pesto for a month, and I don’t know why.
I ignored my basil for two days because it was 95 degrees and I wasn’t going out there in that heat and this is what at found at 6:15 this morning. Ridiculous.
The dishwasher is fixed, so I'm going to go load it.
That's a great idea!
We’re redoing my kiddos room this week and next—she’s going into middle school, so the pink little girl’s room is getting an upgrade—and we’re going to be donating a lot of books she’s outgrown. I don’t want to do a goodwill dump—any ideas where I might take/send 100+ children’s books?
Abso-fucking-lutely.
I feel like writing ridiculous shit is the only way to go right now.
I'm getting really tired of the "I have video of you wanking, send money or I'll show everyone" emails. Look, I respect the hustle, I do, but you're barking at the wrong squirrel, because A) I don't *watch* porn to jerk off, I *read* it, and B), if you have video of it, I don't care. I just…don't.
I'm so late with ARC for Going Deep, I don't even know if I should put them up on NetGalley. Like, I'm a week from release! Is it even worth it?
Yes, please. I hate this SO MUCH.
I made soup but I don’t wanna eat it.
I went to Costco for Better Than Bouillon so I can make soup this weekend, spent $147, and forgot the Better Than Bouillon.
My husband will re-watch it, but I can't. Once was enough.
Dig, bitch.
I cried a lot at that series, but that scene was gut wrenching.
Ew.
I want to hate it because my kid has it on 24/7 rotation but it’s a fuckin’ bop.
I've been working 8-5 hours plus OT on this WIP and it's fucking exhausting. I've got two more days. Two more days and I can have a nap.
I'm not going to lie, I *LOVE* previews like a puppy belly rubs, but these days even I'm like, "I paid for a movie, right?"
I have two empty ones and one full one, does that count?
Sometimes a Shady Facebook Guy experience is like a Run Down Hole In The Wall Diner experience: the food you still talk about years later.