every interaction i am forced to have in this economy is with some variety of debt leveraged middlemen or information broker in sheep's clothing waiting to fleece me the second i let my guard down
you rockin with bad boy summer⁉️
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every interaction i am forced to have in this economy is with some variety of debt leveraged middlemen or information broker in sheep's clothing waiting to fleece me the second i let my guard down
if i accidentally ran over gavin newsom, i would back up to make sure that i got him
Cuomo running as a Trump Democrat in the NYC mayoral race is one of the funniest things I've ever seen in politics.
our lives were better with Yabushige!
i constantly think about this post
UBER DRIVER, ASKING IF IM HIS FARE: are you Christian? ME, CHUCKLING: heh heh heh quite the opposite, my friend
if i were plundering an ancient Egyptian pyramid, i simply would not awaken the evil cursed mummy inside
lmao
it’s going to be so funny when they run Hillary again in 2028
I thought the whole point of international waters was that everything was legal.
phew
ok sorry
Probably the worst 2nd half for a movie in the history of cinema
i can tell that Paul has not progressed to them going backstage yet
who up timbering they shivers?
you should have to pass some sort of competency exam before you are allowed on the internet
they should build a bridge across the Atlantic Ocean to make it easier to vacation to Europe
i met anubis in the realm of the underworld, big strong guy by the way, had a dog’s head, i’m not so sure about that. and he said to me, mr president, you’ve got the heaviest soul we’ve ever weighed down here. can you believe it? they’ve never seen a soul that heavy in all of duat
“Im an alive human”
im being Normal about Sydney Sweeney on the internet
Mark Hamil’s “Hark, Mammal!”
his corpse will be pieced out and sold to the highest bidder as collectibles
that day is right now
Fart attack
he forgot to vaccinate against a fart attack😭
Eric is inconsolable
Donald Trump has died
it should be at least 400 times harder to get a driver's license
Our enemy isn’t China; it’s Rahm Emanuel
i have built a model that will 100% predict the future accurately, unless it doesn’t, which i can attribute solely to random variance
there's no reason to listen to the gambling addict stats nerd
I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by Computer
yeah it pays $2/hour plus whatever you make in tips from the babies
im asking for $12 million in exchange for 1% of my company
i am simply filling a need in the marketplace
im the CEO of a company that goes around and steals candy from babies and resells at exorbitant prices
line go up!
obvious clone
How dare you be out of my favorite treats, what is this communist china???
Labor Day is all about screaming at various minimum-wage service workers for things that they don’t control
we went a couple years ago for one of ours birthday and had a great time!
oh yeah I like the great wolf lodge!
planting my flag on him being a star
Paul Walter Hauser for president
basically whats happening is FOXDIE is killing them all at the same time
Taylor>Marissa
Rudy Giuliani has been released from hospital after doctors realized he just looks like that
with trump and giuliani edging right up to the border of death, the comedic rule of threes now screams for blood
(interrupting small child singing) Yeah, i know what a teapot looks like, thanks
Mood
i know a clone when i see one
of course the guy who stole the hat from the kid at the US Open is a CEO
happy birthday, jesse pinkman, wherever you are
I only wear cargo shorts because i can fit a Rotisserie Chicken into each pocket
Like this if you still think Trump is dead
i know a clone when i see one
if I could go back in time I'd probably just play halo
That’s Hawaii, flat earth CONFIRMED
Open the schools!
the first clue that Arch wasn’t any good was that he couldn’t beat out Quinn Ewers
Circle of life
Garfield knows
It was played off as a joke but Garfield was fucking right about lasagna
here is lego watto smoking a bong
He died
manifesting
😏
Labor Day is a holiday where we celebrate how great America is
Florence Pugh and David Harbour are too talented to be wasting around doing this shit though
I was amazed that it was actually somewhat ok (joining Black Panther and Thor Ragnarok as MCU movies that didn’t suck ass)
only so many words you can put in a headline but the whole response is loud and proud support for the trans community and worth reading
scrunch #scrunch
BREAKING: Mark Cuban has died (suffocated while trying to suck his own dick)
Can confirm
Mark Cuban wears a wig
I'm ready for lunch
takes a real idiot to be the worst shark on Shark Tank
yeah, it’s been going downhill ever since you showed up, bozo
this is Dean Cain erasure
they really want it to be illegal to dislike them
Mark Ruffalo: Male Juggalo
If Gavin Newsom isn't a Scientologist, how come he administered the test to determine my thetan levels?
Day 10 of trying to be hired by Andrew Cuomo
guess im just built different 😤
putting an “i survived 9/11” bumper sticker on the back of my car
remember when he survived 9/11
I know where you can get some if you’re willing to hike
i will buy an ai that just gives me al bundy
al bundy was right
Why are comedians doing a better job of cutting through the bullshit of politicians in their desperate attempt to justify a genocide than any journalists?
this is the news
