i told her to practice writing prompts in chatGPT to give her a reading list on stoicism and recommend a nootropic stack. anyway im single now
Who's the worst cartoon character? I vote Henry, the dad from Dennis the Menace. He's a mask deliberately invented to whitewash the identity of his creator, Hank Ketcham, one of the worst men to ever make comics. It's gonna take a thread.
I demand Sid Meier's Alpha Centari 2
My “I did a good deed and then got in an unrelated car accident” press statement is raising a lot of questions already answered by my “I did a good deed and then got into an unrelated car accident” press statement.
universe loading the bases for a walkoff grand slam
im constantly getting flagged down to help women victims of domestic violence by the side of the road
Rudy Giuliani crashing his car while shitfaced and getting blown by an escort? That I’ll entertain
More like OFF Manning
Them: “Cities are all rotting hellscapes!” Cities:
My favorite evergreen Molly Ivins quote: "I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag."
see, this is an impressive level of cursed, too many of you are resting on your laurels when it comes to imagining the horrors
A little good news, ADVOCATE, Book Three of THE WARDEN SERIES is $2.99 on all ebook platforms for the next several days! Meet Aelis's mentor, her friend (with occasional benefits) Miralla, her dad, her eldest sister! www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/...
Do this. Y'all will thank me. I'm very bad at ranking things. My brain just has a YES button and a NO button, but this series is exactly what I want from the fantasy genre.
[Bill Cassidy looking down at corpse of chicken he has fucked to death]: That chicken should not have been fucked that hard
Dying at the book he's reading
Tim Walz: "Think of how easy it would be to be a damn Republican. 'Oh, what should I wear today? This stupid frickin' red hat. What should I say today? I don't know, just make sure it's cruel. Who do we listen to? That guy -- the felon in the White House.'"
Walz says Harris "would have been a fantastic president... we wouldn't wake up every day to a bunch of shit on TV. We would wake up to an adult w/ compassion & dignity doing the work, not a manchild crying about whatever is wrong with him. May his fat ankles find something today. Petty as hell."
In 2024, Harris, the DNC, and the SuperPACs scrupulously followed Shor's advice to achieve a decline across every metric and every demographic. Urban, rural, college, non-college, young, old—you name it and Shor's mealy-mouthed centrism produced a loss. So of course Dems still listen to him.
If the recommendation to Democrats was to speak plainly, casually, like a normal person having a real conversation rather than like a politician stumbling through jargon, they’d be gushing about Mamdani and telling Dems to be more like him. But they’re not, because they really mean something else.
A golden age for butt fumbles is on the horizon.
Joe Flacco? Really?
I miss the kind of fantasy books I have been reading in the late 90s. They were suitable for teens but they weren't "teen fantasy". And there was some romance but it was never the main (or even secondary) plot. And now I've read 3 books of the Raksura series by Martha Wells and yes! Just like that!
first they came for john bolton, and i said nothing, because he's a piece of shit who sucks
normal people don't say "triggered" or "heteronormative," they say they gave their life to christ in a cracker barrel parking lot
denmark rocks bc theyll notice that only 80% of their population is currently laying in the grass in a park with a six pack of 8% beer reading a book while on a 3 hour lunch break from work making $50/hr selling croissants at a cafe called GOBBO or FLUUZ and their government will spring into action
James Dobson dedicated his life to evil and the world is worse because he made it so on purpose. defector.com/james-dobson...
Sam Altman: I see humans achieving omnipotence using dark matter by… 2030 maybe? That’s if OpenAI is given a quadrillion dollars Theo Von: Yeah Altman: Or, we may become a race of slaves, genetically modified to be harvested by robot spiders. That’s if OpenAI doesn’t get the money Von: Right
Me: These people, they are your family. This is your history. Your past is your future. This is what has made you the person you are. This is what you will pass on to your children. This is your legacy. My children: look at all these uncs
100%! Its a brutal industry and you need to eat! But, if at any point you feel compelled to write them, know that you have one sale in your back pocket.
Every time you mention this, I will feel compelled to state that *I* want to read future warden sequel novels.
I still think it’s a middle ground where they’re deeply unpopular incompetent idiots that will accomplish nothing lasting but will nevertheless cause massive domestic and international harm through sheer malicious willpower
Every voice adds to the choir. Good luck!
Sue the fuck out of them
JD Vance Booed By Own Reflection In Mirror theonion.com/jd-vanc...
Stephen Miller Tears Up As Son Says First 14 Words
AOL To Discontinue Dial-Up Internet theonion.com/aol-to-...
Besides the point, but why does Columbus have a Spanish accent?
jigsaw the throat goat's depo has to be an all-timer, gonna have to read the whole thing at some point
No you read this and then spent the next 5 mins mucking around with a shit bit of Javascript to test the idea out
Violet was adopted today!! 🎉🥳👏
BEST NOVELETTE/NOVELLA goes to…The Butcher of the Forest, Premee Mohamed, Tordotcom #AuroraAwards2025
Personally I hope we find out that what Gollum was doing while wandering about looking for the ring was either solving a series of cozy murders (Precious We Wrotes) or performing in an incompetent hobbit amateur dramatic troupe (The Ring that Goes Wrong)
We sometimes get "This is a landmark case!" Sir, please pay your child support.
I love these ridiculous boys. Chicory & Satsuma are both looking for a home and they would sure love to go together. They’re a perfect pair and they have formed a great connection.
The dust on mars smells like fuck all nothing because there is no atmosphere
Speaking as a 56-year-old man I think you’re going to have problems swelling the ranks of ICE with 59-year-old men. Like I can probably leap out of a panel van in a Nazi suit to chase brown people in a Home Depot parking lot ONCE before my knees are going to give out and I’m on medical leave
Say what you will, but Republicans are pretty consistent in their attitude that children should be treated as consenting adults.
Report: 250 Million Americans Still Need Guests On Their Podcasts This Week
We all have that one friend..You know the one. Could be described as a bit “quirky.” Marches to the beat of their own drum. Refuses to adhere to convention. If this doesn’t sound familiar…we hate to break it to you but chances are you are that friend. On the bright side you’re in excellent company
I don’t know how long I’ll have signal. If I go dark, either we’re in a dead zone or Crystal took us all to hell with her. Remember me as I lived…turning minor events into lengthy sagas on Bluesky.
Figured out that if I really quickly heat up my raw milk, a lot of the bad stuff goes away but you still get all of the same benefits. This is crazy.
Why Your Team Sucks heads west to roast the 49ERS, who just paid their little tiny dipshit QB too much money. defector.com/why-your-tea...
You pull your screaming child away from your beloved but now elderly cat, and tell him to be quiet. Magnus smiles sympathetically. "Is the boy always like this?" He nods towards the lion enclosure. "We also accept larger donations."
call me old fashioned, but I prefer to see humanity get its comeuppance from atomically-mutated animals rather than brain-rotting chatbots and drug-crazed billionaires whipping up algorithmic incel jihads
"they said have you tried turning her off and turning her back on again, i said, how about i meet you halfway"
They Came From Planet Happiness existentialcomics.com/comic/614
PA Renfaire: our tickets go online in..February? March? They remain pretty easy to get for months at a time. MD Renfaire: they are available for 30 seconds, one day of the year, IF the ticketing system we contracted to works, which it won't.
socrates: so his congress with the heteira Lois is impossible, for his semen would cut through her like the farmer scythes through wheat
*burying head in hands* they didn’t open the fucking envelope
I can't afford to go to 5 cats or I would :(:(
A very kind donor has offered a $150 Chewy/Petco gift card for anyone who adopts Chicory & Satsuma together. Located in Elkton, MD, apply here: form.jotform.com/crits4cats/c...
Can confirm! I really enjoyed the series. In fact, I’m lobbying for Daniel to extend/ expand it. #BluSkyBooks
i don't think i've seen a single person actually freak out about the ad, but i've seen 7000 articles and posts from pundits about people freaking out about it
In my defense my wife was watching America’s Got Talent and that always gets me in a kind of Lovecraftian mindset.
insidehealthpolicy.com/daily-news/f...
Ironically the reason President Trump can’t fire Pam Bondi is that she now knows what are in the Epstein files.
The so-called "writing staff" has taken me aside to tell me to stop ordering the $5 Dunkin' meal deal several times a week because it's "making everyone sad" and they're "worried about me" and "the grease from the bag never fully comes off the table," all of which is illegal workplace harassment.
Median writing workshop be like
The most disheartening thing about America’s descent into fascism has been the abject cowardice of virtually all the people and institutions that could have stood up and refused to comply.
he's going to brazenly pardon maxwell, she'll publicly say he's never so much as looked at a woman in his life, and they'll jail obama for the two treasonous hoaxes. you know it and i know it
These two are still not eating great on their own and are getting regular tube feeds, but their energy is definitely back!!
Imagine being a Columbia alumnus and watching Linda fucking McMahon, the pedo queen of pro wrestling, take a victory lap like this because the other pedos in the administration dogwalked the university and made them eat shit and now they're all having a big laugh about it
Bradley Edwards, attorney for Epstein survivors, says on MSNBC that the executors of Epstein's estate are in possession of the birthday book containing Trump's letter and would be willing to turn it over to authorities
I hate agreeing with Musk but he was right:
close the schools
The absolute presidential immunity established in Trump v. United States should extend to every brush with pedophilia Trump and his advocates have had. by Alan Dershowitz
There's a bombshell story about New York City elites running a sex trafficking ring patronized by the president from New York City and other New York City elites but the New York City elites that run the New York Times say there's no story there so hey, it's all settled, ha ha, hey what's over there
I hope we survive long enough for the people behind this to be prosecuted. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
Sir Thomas Browne in the 1600s: Immortality any day now, boss! Paracelsus in the 1500s: Immortality any day now, boss! Geber in the 800s: Immortality any day now, boss! Really ancient alchemists the world over: Immortality any day now, boss! DO WE SEE A PATTERN YET
If you are having anxiety about something, you'll often dream about it. But if you aren't having anxiety about anything in particular, your brain reaches deep into the anxiety backlog and it is like "okay okay what if a gorilla kidnapped your wife? That would be stressful, huh? What would you do??"
Doing my part to make Tor (why aren't they on bsky?!) pay @soundingline.bsky.social to write more books about Aelis and maybe @sachinteng.bsky.social can draw them some more too
A Nazi owns Twitter, right wing billionaires own the Wall Street Journal and the LA Times, and CBS is run by a right wing nepo baby who just fired one of the network’s biggest stars for criticizing Donald Trump. Here’s why America has a left-wing media bias problem.
im going to make solar illegal. no trans in sports. college athletes shouldn't make money. rupert murdoch is too woke. it's like that twilight zone where everyone is terrified of the little kid with godlike powers except the little kid is a bitter old man with a failing cardiovascular system
Congrats to Stephen Colbert for never bending the knee.
Kid in math class: "when will I ever use this??" Teacher: "you will use this every Sunday at the bar, when trying to reason with idiots about what the greatest Wide Receiver season of all time was."
Things have been iffy for a while but suddenly got dire. We’ll surely be ok but currently need a bit of help. Thank you to everyone who has donated, it’s such a relief and we’re shocked at the response. Thank you!
She is still waiting, not a single app for this incredibly silly, sweet baby girl. Here’s some new pics to share around!
We have two incredible kitties that just can’t seem to find their people. Chicory wants a home with another friendly and playful cat friend to wrestle, and Violet would 100% want to be your only pet. We gave the perfect black cat accessory for you! Located Elkton, MD. Apply crits4cats.petfinder.com
CEO of Oreo Cookies: the oreo cookie is as important as oxygen
this review of Chuck Schumer's book (and through it, his entire moronic ideology) is actually extraordinarily good jewishcurrents.org/chuck-schume...
