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Steve Lambert

@madeofsquares.bsky.social

Illustrator and web designer. It'll be all art, video games and food. And swearing, probably. https://linktr.ee/madeofsquares He/him

created September 20, 2023

160 followers 281 following 569 posts

view profile on Bluesky

Posts

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Just... abysmal. Day after day it just gets worse!

1/9/2025, 8:26:49 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Jim Rossignol (@rossignol.bsky.social) reposted

This is very good.

1/9/2025, 8:10:52 AM | 63 19 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I feel your pain Trand!

30/8/2025, 7:58:28 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture John Cullen (@nellucnhoj.bsky.social) reposted

our recently lost equine greats ------------------------------- patreon.com/nhoj

6 panel comic P1: Title in large red text reads
29/8/2025, 4:09:06 PM | 133 34 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

I reported that Israeli propaganda YouTube ad I saw the other day. Not sure what I expected, really.

A really concerning my YouTube ad report, basically saying Israeli government propaganda saying that they're not starving Gaza isn't against their terms.
29/8/2025, 3:55:46 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Disgusting. They should be made to require age verification before anyone looks at or enters a branch. Think of the children!

29/8/2025, 12:35:40 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Those are just two exceptional cases. It's there on the gov.uk website in black and white. So, no, you're wrong. In answer to your question, the UK public get a say when they vote. It's how our democracy works.

26/8/2025, 6:16:02 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Sorry, you are wrong. This were special cases. It's right there on the gov website. I've included a handy screenshot...

image
26/8/2025, 5:19:37 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

There are no safe routes. Currently you can only apply for asylum in this country once you make it here. That's why they come over in small boats. Make safe routes with a solid application procedure, remove the market for small boat gangs.

26/8/2025, 5:08:30 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I don't care. I am fine with immigration and we need a functioning asylum procedure. The only way to stop the boats and "smash the gangs" as you put it is to make safe routes for asylum seekers and process the huge backlog of asylum claims.

26/8/2025, 3:30:31 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

WELL THERE'S A SURPRISE

Info on the advert from YouTube:
26/8/2025, 3:23:52 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

What the fuck is this YouTube ad I just saw??

Screen grab of the final message in an absolute horseshit YouTube ad claiming
26/8/2025, 3:22:27 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Also, this will not stop the boats!

26/8/2025, 7:24:07 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Fucking embarrassing racist arseholes.

23/8/2025, 5:40:59 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Still can't understand a word you're saying.

23/8/2025, 2:35:51 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I didn't understand a word of that. Take Bezos' dick out your mouth and try again.

23/8/2025, 12:28:32 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

The CEO of Starbucks is also not a brain surgeon.

23/8/2025, 12:26:00 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

I was looking for red condiment.

Photo of some bottles on a shelf in a Sainsbury's supermarket. The label reads:
22/8/2025, 9:08:12 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

👀

21/8/2025, 9:18:39 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Vile. Utterly vile.

21/8/2025, 5:49:05 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Designer Hasan (@designer4hasand.bsky.social) reposted

Horrific scenes unfolded yesterday in Gaza’s Sheikh Radwan neighborhood, as an Israeli airstrike deliberately targeted civilians near a makeshift phone charging tent, leaving bodies in pools of blood, some still gasping for breath, with devastating injuries & body parts scattered across the street.

21/8/2025, 7:37:49 AM | 16 20 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Perfection!

21/8/2025, 8:06:01 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Fuck you Labour

20/8/2025, 9:08:32 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

"chicken" fuck sake

20/8/2025, 7:23:53 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Chicken on this hoping it would be Zardoz. Was not disappointed! Unfortunately I sunburn way too easy!

20/8/2025, 7:16:53 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Ahhhhh (@nerdjpg.com) reposted

Hmm. Turns out the evil and the lesser evil people have evil solidarity. Drat

18/8/2025, 6:13:09 PM | 1494 290 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

DON'T TRUST THIS. I just tried it hoping to find a bottle of gin in the freezer but now there are frozen peas all over the floor and I slipped on them and now I have a concussion.

19/8/2025, 6:30:21 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

None of these things were ever exclusively enjoyed by men. Not even close. Except maybe men's clubs, but who in their right mind would enjoy that?!

19/8/2025, 6:19:58 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture good hyuck, babe! (@markpopham.bsky.social) reposted

I am fucking begging people to go to this website and do what it says and get rid of the AI summaries tenbluelinks.org

19/8/2025, 3:11:02 PM | 940 580 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Looks like the bloody Crypt Keeper!

19/8/2025, 8:22:57 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture J. L. Westover (@mrlovenstein.bsky.social) reposted

much better

image
18/8/2025, 2:00:03 PM | 1904 356 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Tim & Eric you say? I'll have to check this out... Also, do I see DJ Doug Pound on there?

15/8/2025, 10:05:10 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Caræsten 🇵🇸 (@cara.city) reposted

continue to be pleasantly surprised by Steve Wozniak managing to be one of the only big names in tech who isn't an enormous piece of shit

Re: Sold his stock (+1) brunes69 4 days ago Woz is worth over 100M. He's not sitting in the poor house. Reply Share Flag Re: Sold his stock (+5, Informative) SteveWoz 4 days ago I gave all my Apple wealth away because wealth and power are not what I live for. I have a lot of fun and happiness. I funded a lot of important museums and arts groups in San Jose, the city of my birth, and they named a street after me for being good. now speak publicly and have risen to the top. I have no idea how much I have but after speaking for 20 years it might be $10M plus a couple of homes. I never look for any type of tax dodge. earn money from my labor and pay something like 55% combined tax on it. I am the happiest person ever. Life to me was never about accomplishment, but about Happiness, which is Smiles minus Frowns. I developed these philosophies when I was 18-20 years old and never sold out. Reply Share Flag
15/8/2025, 5:30:27 PM | 2532 512 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture The IMEU (@theimeu.bsky.social) reposted

Israel has made Gaza the deadliest place in the world for journalists — killing 270+ reporters and media workers in the last 22 months. Israel cannot continue killing Palestinian journalists with impunity—it must be sanctioned.

15/8/2025, 8:41:56 PM | 73 42 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Wow! He looks fantastic in that photo.

14/8/2025, 6:11:44 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

The noise Ripley makes when she sees Parker and Lambert is just perfection!

14/8/2025, 12:10:50 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Andy Kelly (@ultrabrilliant.xyz) reposted

Due to POPULAR DEMAND I'm doing another print run of my Ridge Racer Type 4 fanzine. - 40 pages, 7 original essays - Deep dives into the game's visual design, soundtrack, storytelling, and more - Printed on 170gsm silk paper stock with a heavyweight 350gsm cover 🔗 ultrabrilliant.etsy.com

Three copies of One More Win on a white background. A feature titled GARAGE TALK. A feature about the Namco JogCon. A spread detailing the game's tracks.
13/8/2025, 3:59:03 PM | 175 56 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Really enjoyed Perfect Organism, and this looks beautiful but missed the first run. No hesitation this time!

13/8/2025, 8:12:37 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

A classic. The "dork ass losers" always makes me giggle

12/8/2025, 8:30:26 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Man, it sure is wild to see the "left wing" party doing more nazi shit that the Tories.

8/8/2025, 5:25:27 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Horny as a box of frogs

8/8/2025, 12:20:47 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Truly, they are gods amongst us.

6/8/2025, 7:40:18 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture alternate ending (@jamiroqueer.bsky.social) reposted

“Uh, no, when you were on the roof they were shouting ‘Trump! Trump!”

Smithers lies to Monty Burns that his boos are people chanting “Boo-urns.”
5/8/2025, 3:22:50 PM | 3572 799 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I guess this is what happens when you're a rich idiot surrounded by yes men. You think the most basic, obvious shit is a stroke of genius. He's at that money/power level where there's never anyone around him to stop and say "hold on, that idea is bad and you should feel bad".

5/8/2025, 6:54:39 PM | 23 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture John Cullen (@nellucnhoj.bsky.social) reposted

cyber mondays

8 panel comic P1: A puddle of what may be blood on what looks to be a pavement, rendered grey-purple by the night P2: a foot elwewring abrown shoe enters the frame and steps hard in the liquid, disturbing it-- P3: --before just as rapidly lifting output the puddle, exiting the frame, leaving ripples in its wake P4: A wide Dutch angle shot, revealing a backlit silhouetted figure running from headlights. A dark and ominous city rises skyward in the distance P5: we reveal the owner of the foot. It is a panicked and disheveled looking Jon Arbuckle. He is running forward, but looking back over his shoulder at some unseen pursuer, before-- P6: --BAM! He suddenly slams into a silhouetted figure P7: POV is now over Jon's right shoulder. Sweat beads his face as he backs away from a playoon of Judge Dredd like police. The one in front clasps an electric baton on both gloved hands. A butnjng sting of blue crackles at its pronged tip. The lead cop --all jaw and gristle-- scowls beneath a helmet shaped like a cartoon orange cat P8: skyscrapers loom and dominate the red sky. Two of them have large signs with the apathetic face of The Cat. They both have captions which read
2/12/2024, 9:51:13 PM | 691 125 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Nature (@nature.com) reposted

This surprisingly relaxing footage is from SIX MILES under the ocean – and it’s the deepest ecosystem yet discovered

31/7/2025, 3:38:50 PM | 14329 3456 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture hartsfleurs.bsky.social (@hartsfleurs.bsky.social) reposted reply parent

This 👇👇👇

image
31/7/2025, 10:29:34 AM | 7 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Yep. That rictus, ultra-white teeth grin is an instant nope.

31/7/2025, 8:00:19 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Porn: Bad, must show us your face Nazis: Okay. Carry on…

31/7/2025, 7:57:28 AM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Oh wow, I love the look of this. Chunky with a pinch of retro!

30/7/2025, 8:31:53 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

*struggle 🙄

30/7/2025, 6:23:08 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

What media player do you use out of interest? I would like to do this, but article to find a good player.

30/7/2025, 5:58:39 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Money wins again

30/7/2025, 7:36:15 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Oh wow, I'm 16 again!

29/7/2025, 9:17:06 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

This is shit. Love Brick Lane. Had some great curries there in the past. And my degree show was at the Truman Brewery (were going back a couple decades of course)!

29/7/2025, 12:19:00 PM | 1 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Hogarty (@misterbrilliant.bsky.social) reposted

Streisand Effect in action with this online age verification thing. I've just found out what "porn" is (pictures of people shagging!!) and it's brilliant. A real own goal for Keir Starmer if you ask me. But don't bother asking me, I'll be too busy enjoying "porn"! 😎

28/7/2025, 5:43:44 PM | 460 116 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Emily (@emilyonhere.gay) reposted

i CANNOT stop watching this

25/7/2025, 3:28:47 PM | 12819 2714 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

To be fair, Kahn is, generally, decent and tends to be on the correct side of things. Wes Streeting, however, is a horrible shit who's popularity has been steadily nosediving!

24/7/2025, 8:24:02 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Andy Kelly (@ultrabrilliant.xyz) reposted

The audio version of Perfect Organism, my Alien: Isolation companion book, is out today! - Learn the story behind the game's creation - Play along with a huge mission-by-mission analysis - Professionally narrated - Unabridged (8 hours 37 minutes) 🔗 www.audible.co.uk/pd/The-Perfe...

24/7/2025, 11:58:30 AM | 76 20 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

I was always shit at parrying in souls games. Always dex build, always dodge roll for me. Bloodborne though made the parry a gun, so if you miss you still shoot the bastard! Inspired move.

23/7/2025, 9:01:37 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

"Do I have to gotta go fast?"

22/7/2025, 7:22:27 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Aaron Bady (@zunguzungu.bsky.social) reposted

There was a time when you could describe Gaza as an "open-air prison," and people would scoff at the ludicrous hyperbole, and now we're at "Gaza is an open-air death camp" and that's just ... true.

20/7/2025, 12:26:47 PM | 1768 726 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

This is so intensely embarrassing it's giving me hives

19/7/2025, 7:13:03 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Needs a trigger warning. This is scary!

18/7/2025, 9:08:23 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

This one is so ridiculous it *has* to be a parody, right? RIGHT?

18/7/2025, 3:23:02 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Anonymous (@youranoncentral.bsky.social) reposted

Israeli teens refuse to commit genocide and war crimes in Gaza, they are burning their draft papers and protesting against Netanyahu and the IDF. “Never again for everyone” #3E #EndImpunity #FreePalestine

17/7/2025, 9:23:14 PM | 3985 1283 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Oh shit, also Hiroyuki Sanada!

17/7/2025, 6:55:37 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Ah I missed that — was reading quickly as at the end of a lunch break. Honestly would have thought the opposite, but also was wondering if this is something trans kids are going to for advice/support they're struggling to get elsewhere.

16/7/2025, 1:23:18 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I didn't see it in there, but would be interested to see a gender breakdown on this.

16/7/2025, 12:47:35 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Kate Compton (@galaxykate.bsky.social) reposted

hey who wants to see the worlds most sinister hotel sink

12/7/2025, 9:06:05 PM | 1428 483 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Everything, even the name!

15/7/2025, 1:37:58 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Chuck Groenink (@cgroenink.bsky.social) reposted reply parent

The less often mentioned women of Lord of the Rings: Goldberry, Lobelia Sackville-Baggins, Rosie Cotton, and Ioreth of the houses of healing in Minas Tirith.

I’m assuming all those corded ware pots Tom took from the barrow downs. Obviously Lotho painted Lobelia’s toenails Stout and buxom Tolkien gave her a name that literally meant ‘old woman’
14/7/2025, 1:41:48 AM | 213 59 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Pee-Wee Merman (@amagire.bsky.social) reposted

14/7/2025, 4:43:35 AM | 908 143 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Found an old exercise book at the car boot this morning. Love looking through this kind of thing!

Old exercise book cover Inside of an old exercise book Inside of an old exercise book Inside of an old exercise book
13/7/2025, 1:48:14 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

With you 100%!

12/7/2025, 8:52:41 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Alasdair Beckett-King (@misterabk.bsky.social) reposted

When I found a pub with an inverted normal map. (If you understand what this means, you have to repost.)

A whitewashed pub wall, with mortar standing proud of the stones.
9/7/2025, 10:21:05 PM | 1871 907 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture ApocalypticaNow (@apocalypticanow.bsky.social) reposted reply parent

Oh the Charlie itchy anus post is fake but I'm keeping it up because it feels true and I got to repost that Hegseth story

4/7/2025, 8:59:23 PM | 20 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Charlie Kirk apparently doesn't eat burgers, wash his hands or wipe his arse properly!

4/7/2025, 9:24:34 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

This is like when I found out there no statutory sick pay in the US!

3/7/2025, 8:03:55 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Yep. It was a silly mistake to get caught saying it, but he certainly wasn't wrong!

3/7/2025, 7:51:17 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Always enjoy that 2 second bowel cancer scare I get the morning after eating beetroot for dinner!

2/7/2025, 10:26:24 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

1/7/2025, 8:13:02 AM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

I started following her off the back of that video (hasn't previously heard of signal), and lastly agree with what she said -- but if I'm honest with myself, you're spot on here.

30/6/2025, 7:16:29 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

COASTERS, PEOPLE

29/6/2025, 8:42:07 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture PJ Ó Raghallaigh (@pjoreilly.bsky.social) reposted

Not that galling, absolutely fucking brutal, information like this will make a single western leader step in and stop them. Which could happen any fucking time they decided it. Absolute shitshow of cowards and murderers.

27/6/2025, 4:17:52 PM | 7 4 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

TATANGA!

27/6/2025, 2:35:29 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Used to work near there - lovely place to sit and eat lunch!

27/6/2025, 12:12:13 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Was going to say he can never fuck it, but honestly, we all know it's only a matter of time!

26/6/2025, 8:06:38 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

The other day I read an article about guys who had FALLEN IN LOVE with a.i. Were doomed!

26/6/2025, 7:45:23 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Shut the fuck up Wes

22/6/2025, 7:30:50 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Ah wait it's the 2014 Robocop remake, decision made!

20/6/2025, 8:26:40 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

There are some films that if you notic they're currently on TV you just have to watch. Currently RoboCop and Jaws are on. WHAT TO DO?

20/6/2025, 8:25:30 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Stephen Collins (@stephencollins.bsky.social) reposted

british fan chat

cartoon for the guardian by Stephen Collins - script as follows: [Scene is a darkened LOFT. Amongst the boxes and junk are FOUR KNACKERED OLD FANS - three tower fans and one circular, with cracked grey plastic and buttons missing. One fan, TOWER FAN 1, is a bit taller than the others, and is addressing them] 1 TOWER FAN 1: Right lads, get ready. 2 TOWER FAN 1: This is our time. 3 TOWER FAN 1: The time when we remember who we are, and why we’re here. 4 TOWER FAN 1: We are the four crap fans in a British person’s loft, and we are here to make absolutely no difference whatsoever. 5 TOWER FAN 1: I know what you’re thinking, lads: 6 TOWER FAN 1: Surely this will be the year they finally replace us? 7 TOWER FAN 1: Our plastic’s gone all brown... I haven’t oscillated since 2018... 8 TOWER FAN 1: Dave here sounds like a spitfire and blows like a sad cat’s sigh… TOWER FAN 2: Cheers mate 9 TOWER FAN 1: But no. These people are British, and every year, they forget the sun exists. By the time they remember, new fans will cost *four million pounds* on Amazon. 10 TOWER FAN 1: So we’ll be back down there... shovelling thick air across the moaning faces of a species that cannot comprehend the concept of air conditioning, or even just closing the curtains when it’s hot out... 11 TOWER FAN 1: ...while they incessantly bang on about normally hot countries which this country is now temporarily a bit hotter than. 12 [The loft hatch opens and a person comes up the ladder] PERSON: APPARENTLY IT’S HOTTER THAN GREECE, LISA
14/5/2025, 12:20:41 PM | 3187 1229 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Focaccia dough in a baking tin, nearly ready for the oven. Someone is pouring olive oil over the top. Not too be confused with creepy billionaire Bryan Johnson's gross abs.
17/6/2025, 9:31:35 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social)

Stomach like an unbaked focaccia

17/6/2025, 9:26:28 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Given that there are a thousand great stills they could have had from Jaws, you can have this one!

13/6/2025, 8:34:12 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Steve Lambert (@madeofsquares.bsky.social) reply parent

Absolutely yes

13/6/2025, 8:28:04 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view