And the bread thing earlier up thread is such a tell because if even now this dude was doing his own grocery shopping, he'd know that sourdough is both more expensive and less available than the Wonderbread type stuff he's mourning. He's mad his wife is not cooking like a perfect replica of his mom
either that or the one sandwich shop he's aware of now uses sourdough. or he cought covid and is blaming his fucked up sense of taste on bread. honestly, so many options
Yeah you are not wrong about any of this but the original bread poster is a British woman and brexit politician so there are other things going on here I think
I mean, the one calling sourdough break "woke" is a woman, but yeah.
*bread
He’s also apparently too much of a chicken/asshole to actually go to his wife and have the discussion about “hey, could we sometimes get the bread I prefer instead of always sourdough” or wtfever, she’s just supposed to read his mind and/or his pass-agg tweets about it
That person was at least presenting themselves as a woman
so to be fair the bread thing is a woman
No sorry does not fit my theory
good point, retracted
you were on a roll, ticky tack foul call inappropriate
Well technically it was more about loaves than rolls
I'll see myself out
And the least important part of all of this: sourdough is 100% better than regular ass white bread.
Speaking as someone who used to spend time in their chats, SO much of US contemporary fascism is a function of men assuming that the way adulthood worked was, you got a job and in exchange you got a woman to be your mom plus your sex toy. They are ENRAGED that they have a job but no sex mommy.
Oh yes. My first husband (born 1969) explained to me that he was promised as a man he shouldn't have to do domestic labor, and explicitly blamed his depression on my wanting help around the house. (The depression also "kept him" from working... my breadwinner didn't exempt me from his expectations)
I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
This was a common assumption among many men, they just became embarrassed to admit it and now they’re roaring back. My hubby’s college roommate said he couldn’t wait to get married so he never had to do laundry or cook again. 1981. (Not for kids and definitely not for love.)
I just don’t get having that attitude in college. How hard is laundry for a single college guy? What was he cooking that was so hard to make? Honestly, kids are what make laundry and cooking a PITA. 😃
I was in college in 1981 and even then had no intention whatsoever of catering to a man. Gen Jones child of a single mom who went to law school while I was in high school, fiercely independent and undersupervised. I don't even like having a male boss.
I'm a guy, pretty sure it never worked like that. Also if I even so much as suggested it, my current girlfriend and pretty much every woman I've ever had in my life would punch me right in the mouth.
Like 90% of my parents generation have relationships exactly like that. There was *massive* social pressure on women to quit their jobs by a certain age, get married and become homemakers, and that was what the vast majority of men expected.
No, not as long as I've been alive and I'm 51.
Sorry but that's dangerously ignorant. Large portions of the country still operate this way, especially in deeply Republican and Christian communities.
I live in northern Michigan, the town my ex-wife is from is still kinda like that. But I'm here to tell you most families that are single income end up on welfare, which when I lived up there 25 years ago was still looked down upon.
You got married, or you could be a secretary, nurse, or teacher. That was it.
Honorable mentions go to hairdresser or nun
Notably all care-driven professions to some degree.
Many of those also allow enough schedule flexibility to bear the brunt of childcare when you’re off the clock (nurses can work nights and weekends, hairstylists can work part time and set their own schedule, teachers can take summer off)
It has been a *very* long time since society worked that way. At least 40 years.
Longer.
True and it is the expectation that drives behaviour. Whether or not the expectation is tethered to reality is largely irrelevant.
Men's expectations should not drive women's behavior.
I did not mean to suggest that they should.
I was replying to Jenna, who said expectations drive behavior. When I reached adulthood in '81, my expectations were I could do, be, dream, expect anything. The expectations of men *of me* were irrelevant.
Also, the job was them in charge and very important.
"If given the choice between having a job and no sex mommy or having a sex mommy but no job, I should not hesitate but to choose the latter." —Benjamin Franklin
Best deliberate misattribution of a quote since someone said: "'Living well is the best revenge.' — Leonardo da Vinci"
Most of their jobs aren’t well paid enough to fund a “traditional family/ trad wife” so they want a wife who works plus housekeeper/nanny/bangmaid.
A “bangmaid” 😂😂
They want what I have heard called a bang maid
Yeh and they (men) need to get over it ..it’s not all about them. And young women need to not allow themselves to be gaslighted into believing that being subservient to a man is the only thing that makes them worthy and valuable.
The right wing is big mad because women are telling them no. You can tell because of the whiny articles on how feminist women need to suck it up and date right wing men. And the laws trying to force us to have babies.
Right wing hypermasculine men are just wasted space.
Women need to not let themselves get trapped into such a life. It’s one thing to want children .. but it’s another to have that that forced on them.
@gwensnyder.bsky.social its such a WEAK engagement too. They have no idea how the world works or people function. Theyre enraged at not being catered to.
One example I see at work is paid parental leave. Wife takes it after pregnancy. When wife is ready to go back to work hubs takes his. It allows for an extended period. You combine that now with the structuring of 2 days work from home and you can have mom or dad at home most days during the week.
Part of their fury there is that the mom shouldn’t work at all in their view and women should be dependent on an exact pipeline of parents’ care next to husband care ONLY they want that pipeline down to a specific day and date And they want single “femoid” life to be utterly impossible on her own
My job has 50% remote, and both my boss and his wife work for the same company. They have two young children, and this summer, that means someone is always home with their kids, or able to take them to appointments for an hour or two, rather than taking the whole day/afternoon/morning off.
(And for young people, seeing that your (male) manager does things like 'taking an hour of family leave to go take his daughter to the pediatrician while he's working from home' reinforces that is a parent job, not a 'mom' job.)
Ok but have they tried being nice to women and treating them like fellow human beings?
It worked for me.
Don't be absurd! Other people are not worth that!
That might mean a little bit of work and thought on their part and that doesn’t mesh with their entitlement beliefs.
Turns out actual human beings with their own equally valid wants and needs don’t make great sex mommies
They find the idea emasculating and self-abnegating
What? No! No, why on earth would they do that???
That may get you a loving adult partner. In an adult relationship. MAGAs spit on that. They want a sex mommy who is legally chained to them and has no rights.
But they also want sex mommy to be an 18 year old virgin who has never left her parents house so not sure where they think they’ll get the emotional support from
Whoever they end up cheating on the wife with.
Bingo!
Speaking from personal experience their idea of emotional support is emotional abuse and domestic violence to express their negative emotions and keep their wifeservant (and potentially kids as well) obedient
No. Instead, they teach babycare to 12 year old girls in public school in Texas. Grooming institutionalized. Rapists pick the mother of their children.
The problem is that some of them exclusively want to r*pe kids 🥴
This is brought to you by RELIGION. The non religious men don't think this way. Why do you think that is? 🤔
I’m sorry but some of the New Atheist guys were the first on the “anti-SJW” bandwagon, complaining about feminists, etc. To think that eliminating religion would eliminate patriarchy is naive & optimistic.
You've read an awful lot into my statement. This is also part of the problem.
You said “non religious men don’t think this way” and some absolutely do. You’re saying that this is brought to us by “RELIGION” and I am offering a contradiction.
Religion has absolutely been a huge force in codifying and enforcing this expectation: Christianity and Islam (among others) explicitly define women’s roles as wives, mothers, and servants of the family.
Religious teachings often emphasize women’s “duty” to care for husbands, children, and homes, while men are positioned as leaders. Marriage ceremonies, religious laws, and clerical interpretations have historically reinforced male entitlement to women’s labor and bodies.
Truthfully, I’ve only ever really dated non-religious men and they all still believe this. They don’t say it of course, they pay lip service to feminism, but they have the same gendered expectations (mommy bang maid) as the religious ones.
Don't date those guys. Help them remain lonely.
*whoooosh*
4B
*whooooooooooosh*
Amen!💎
🎯
You could, be, just not a tremendous insufferable bore, guys. Take up a hobby and mow the damn lawn. Clean the bathroom. Start making hot sauce. It’s really easy.
That twisted very tight with “having exceptional killing power makes you king and being king gets you a sex mommy” from video games
And that’s also part of why other cultures and groups make them furious. They idolize Patrick Bateman, a cruel and vicious man who tortures and butchers people, because they want a do that. Where a key point in the story is that all these hideous men have shut down all sense of their true self.
These awful real world men gave up all joy and all sense of self. When they see people sharing cultures, they’re livid cuz they have none (that’s why they shriek “VIKINGS!” and “WESTERN CIV!” And queer or disabled people make them angry too! “YOU SELF ID? YOU ENJOY BEING YOURSELF? BUIUURN!”
I didnt realize this was a thing. I feel guilty if I cant pull my own weight.
Then they complain about Islamists and others without often realising their attitudes towards women are scarily similar?
When I was in college, I was engaged for a while to a guy who lived with his parents and WHOSE MOTHER STILL MADE HIS BED EVERY DAY. So glad I dodged that bullet.
When I was in college I dated a guy whose mom blamed ME for his failing grades. As if he didn't choose to skip class and homework on his own.
And then they either hate they job they have or have none at all, and end up living in their actual mother's basement.
They forgot that the other half of the deal was that they have to earn enough money that their sex mommy can be a homemaker as her full-time job. But very few people can support a family on one salary anymore. So women have to work full time jobs too, and aren’t available to just be bangmaids.
Not that it was ever really a good deal for the women. Sure, some couples I know make the breadwinner/homemaker labor division work, without it being a bangmaid thing. But that “not being a bangmaid thing” is key to it working when women have other options.
But, to the main point, there was supposed to actually be SOMETHING in it for the woman. Not just servitude to a manchild while she has to pay bills too.
If she’s gotta pay bills either way why should she babysit your lame ass, bro? She’s not getting anything out of it! You’re not paying her bills and she probably has more and better orgasms solo too. You can be replaced by a hitachi and a hitachi doesn’t demand to be cooked for & cleaned up after.
What happens to that woman with no work experience, bank account or credit history if her husband leaves her or dies?
If you read the whole series of posts, you may notice that in the second one I mention that it was still a raw deal for the woman. I am pointing out that it’s even MORE of a raw deal if you have to do TWO full time jobs instead of one.
This is pretty much what happened to my first marriage. He told me that he was OK with sharing chores and everything and as soon as we started living together I was doing University, working, cooking, cleaning, washing and paying the bills. And he became violent very early. I wish I had left sooner.
God this is so true.
Well the 'sex/mommy' thing does sound pretty awesome, but yeah, probably not something you should be counting on.
Very well observed.
their right hand stopped having sex with them?
A bunch of them can't hold a job either, which (of course) is somebody else's fault.
I do feel that, growing up in the 80s & 90s male coded, this is the exact messaging I was given by society at large. It was a lie, of course, but this was the normalized messaging. But you, you know, grow up, realize it was a lie, & learn to live in the real world. Not regress into childhood.
Great point. The sad fact is that the last quarter century almost everything is being marketed through nostalgia and companies want people, especially men to stay in a childish mind to keep buying the same toys that they bought forty years ago when they were kids.
Less of a comment on the men being told they would get a job & have a wife who is a sex servant part, but on the specific nostalgic images OP is replying too. This is a photo of my bedroom I just took. It's... honestly, not substantially different from those paintings. No one took this away.
Mind my bed. I am washing my sheets as we speak.
now if we can just erode womens' rights enough, they'll prefer to be that, rather than eke by in abject poverty like it's 1920
Not all of them have jobs, at least not good ones. But ... your point is valid. We have been a patriarchal society (though that oversimplifies the power dynamics of many relationships). That's starting to change, and yes, loss of privilege feels like oppression to many men.
The same system that used to hand them sex mommies also used to hand them jobs that paid decently without them having to actually work to do well in school for it
I think a lot of racism is about this too. A kind of self-infantilization.
And they’re too dumb to recognize that their voicing this attitude shrinks the pool even further for them leading them to get more frustrated & stridently misogynist shrinking the pool… ♾️
So my take on the bread thing is actually that this is a rich person who only shops at wholefoods because they are scared of the poors, & so doesn't realize Wonderbread is everywhere. Either way, both interpretations get you to the same ultimate outcome.
Actually the bread complainer is a woman. But I think a woman doing a bit. To own the libs or whatever.
There's long been a distrust of "fancy" food by many people in the UK (one of the reasons British food has a bad rep), in the 90s it was columnists/comedians moaning about sundried tomatoes and so on, this feels like an extension of that, coupled with a bit of the "anti-elites" culture war stuff
Right, except takeaway curry and spag bol are also claimed by the British now. Read an article today about Dublin "spice bags" and the British writer who was visiting Dublin talked about "classic Chinese takeaway chips" and I am just ...
Oh yeah there's no logic as to what is and isn't "fancy", basically anything out of the ordinary seems to frighten/upset/annoy some people.
Remember them mocking Obama for asking for Grey Poupon mustard like it was some incredibly elite stuff, and remembering that my mom had it in the refrigerator, in Ohio, in the 1970s.
White bread rager is a woman
I feel like he was mad about sandwiches at places like Panera not being like the cheapass sandwich wedges from the roach coaches
