I'm sorry for the pain you must have gone through. With the understanding that laughter is the best medicine I prescribe a review of some facts of life.

LOL Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to respond. I needed that today.

I am also very sorry that this happened to you, as it happened to me, too. That said, I did not choose to spend 45 years perpetuating religious hate... I figured out in my teens that the church &/or the patriarchy it upholds was the problem & I've been working to smash it ever since.... 🤷‍♀️

CW:DV IDGAF when you left. Your circumstances weren't the same as mine. Did you hide in closets to keep from being humiiated by your abusive mother, or have her defend the pedophile she married when he started messing with your genitals? If not, either be supportive or shut the fuck up.

You have no goddamn idea what it's like to be terrified to do anything because it could result in a beating, degradation, humiliation, and/or emotional abandonment. I lived in that hellhole for 18 years, which provided the perfect grooming enviornment for my abusive first marriage.

He beat, insulted, degraded, raped, and sodomized me. He had friends watch me when he left the house. I was beaten once for changing the sheets in the evening while he was out of the house because he thought I had time to fuck someone else while caring for a 2 month old baby & 15 month old toddler.

I had a plate of food thrown at me when he got home several hours late and dinner was overcooked. He killed several of my pets. He threatened me -- and our children. When you've walked in my shoes, feel free to insult me. Until then, take your opinion and shove it right up your arrogant ass.

You have not read a single response, huh?

Nope.... I don't think you have.... 🤦‍♀️

Wow. I've been gang-raped by a priest, his son & their friends. Passed around like a collection plate. I guess I'm lucky in that my brain broke in half from it. And my father gave them gifts & forgot their names... I get it. I do. I know your pain. Do you still choose to believe?

I am genuinely sorry you went through that. Sincerely. That is what the Bible teaches. Oppress women.

That is categorically untrue.

Yes.

You are allowed to be angry with such insensitivity. Those who were never under the churches thumb do not realize the strength it takes to leave completely whether you were forced to arrest as a child. I fell for evangelicalism in my 20s to my 50s...

One could say it was a choice. I had gotten so involved and deeply entrenched that I believed it all and felt terror of ever leaving. Then, a new church decided that my mental illness was from demons. They did two 'demon cleansings' and kicked me off my volunteer work.

It all ended when they ended my marriage. No one knows the power of the churches' influence. Many radicals are only following along because they are afraid of all the losses that come with leaving. There has to be a way to reach them.

Thank you. As a abused & unwanted child, church was a safe place for me (In retrospect, maybe not so much, but I was young). I didn't recognize the spiritual abuse for decades. In fact, even after I realized something was wrong, I still couldn't identify it... Until I left & began deconstructing.

There were good things about being in church. I loved it most of the time. It was my last church who mentally abused me so much that I stepped back and saw how deeply wrong I was to be following the Bible literally. I lost my friends and church when I divorced. There was no reason to stay

There were some good things.....the sense of community, even if I was mostly on the outside looking in (never got invited to people's houses, didn't fit with the singles as a single parent or the marrieds because I wasn't, etc), but I started making excuses for what I was seeing ..... (cont)

.../2 at least a decade before I left, because I didn't know anything else. I didn't drink, smoke, or have extramarital sex, so I felt out of touch with unchurched people (I'm sure that's deliberate, too). My kids had friends there and enjoyed the activities they offered (when I could afford them).

/3 I was tolerated, and feared having nobody at all if I left, so I excused or ignored things that others would have seen as spiritually toxic and abusive. 2016 changed it all. I couldn't join with the crowd cheering on a narcissitic, racist, hate-filled man. So they gave me a choice -- (cont)

/4 -- reconsider my position and fall in line with church teachings, or leave. So here I am. I don't regret leaving, but it's been hard as hell. I'm lonely. I don't have anywhere to go - especially with Covid still tear-assing around. This is the deep South. There aren't many like-minded people.

I understand. I have no friends, I don't know how to make any. I was super involved, and love children, so families or just the kids hung out at our house most days. I volunteered all week, but Wed., Sat., Sun. We're the busiest. 2012 started me out, 2015 sealed it

We were in the middle of it all. Music ministry. Prayer. Women's meetings. Children's church. Bible schools. Youth group. Retreats. Retreats. Prayer vigils. Church camp for the kids. Cell group leadership. Special music. Revivals. I went to Bible college. I led worship for several years.

I did special music at other churches. I participated in concerts and musicals. You name it, we did it. And when we left, it was like we dropped off the face of the earth. Total silence. We were shunned for leaving. So much for "love your neighbor as yourself."

You're describing my life. Only difference is that I was 'born-again' when I lived in Albuquerque. I got homesick & returned to Vermont. I went from evangelical churches on every block to two within 50 miles of home. Unfortunately the one we chose severely messed me up. It still took 10yrs to leave

There is not. Religious zealousness is a diagnosable mental health disorder according to the DSM-5.