Private Eye Magazine
@privateeyenews.bsky.social
Britain's best-selling news and current affairs magazine with a unique mix of jokes and investigative journalism. Website: https://private-eye.co.uk Subscribe: http://subsonline.co.uk
created October 13, 2023
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Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Hot on the heels of Mr Bates vs The Post Office, Toby Jones now stars as former Guardian editor Alan Rusbridger in ITV’s new drama, The Hack, which details the phone-hacking scandal. Want to know who Toby Jones will be playing next? Read the Eye. New edition in shops and with subscribers from Weds
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: The Definitive Guide to Private Eye After 10 years and 150 episodes, Adam, Helen and Andy have finally got around to recording an actual introductory episode for Page 94, including a guide to the podcast and Private Eye magazine. pod.fo/e/31fa6d
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“I still yearn for the good old days…” From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
North American Animals: How They Have Changed… From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Subscribe to Private Eye today and get the next issue delivered straight to your door. ➡️ Get 26 issues for just £45. Subscribe: checkout.private-eye.co.uk/SingleItem?I...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
We will not tolerate aggressive, abusive or threatening behaviour… From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“Was it a mistake, killing five journalists?” From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
PLUS news from the Rotten Boroughs of Leicester, Lambeth, Enfield, Tunbridge Wells, Somerset, and Durham in the new Eye. AND a Reform round-up.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
More families took the Tory-led Surrey county council to tribunal for failing to meet SEND duties than any other local authority in England – 2,295 between 2021 and 2024, according to figures revealed by ITV News (the next worst was Hampshire, with 1,329 cases).
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
Full story by ‘Slicker’ in the latest magazine, out now. 🧵3/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
Figures last week from the Office for National Statistics show seasonally unadjusted imports fell in the April-June quarter to £283m, compared with £343m in January-March, and were down almost 15 percent on the first six months of 2024, when imports totalled £735m on a similar basis. 🧵2/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Public opinion may already be reflected in the decline in Israeli goods imported by the UK. 🧵1/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Estate agent: Gen X / Gen Z From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
A small number of ChatGPT employees jumped delightedly in the air as all their hard work was rewarded with top grades all over the country. From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Daylight robbery ‘out of control in London’ From the new Private Eye, out now.
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The Arse of the Deal The new Private Eye is out now.
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It reduces emergency admissions, unnecessary investigations and mortality rates, and raises patient satisfaction. Maybe that’s where the government should be putting its money. ‘MD’ on the NHS summer of discontent, only in the new Private Eye, out now. 🧵2/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Patient satisfaction with the NHS is at an all-time low, often because people struggle to see any doctor, never mind the same one. But continuity of care in general practice is more powerful and better value for money than many drugs. 🧵1/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Lucy Letby’s trial by television: Every terrestrial channel is offering a take on case, so which can you believe? MD's latest on the Lucy Letby case, only in the new Private Eye, out now. ➡️ Read all previous parts of our special report online: www.private-eye.co.uk/special-repo...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“If I said I was wearing a Palestine Action T-shirt would you get here quicker?” From the new Private Eye, in shops now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
The Arse of the Deal The new Private Eye is out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
A retired headteacher was arrested for carrying an Eye joke at a march in July. To hear more about Mr Farley’s arrest and release, tune in to the Summer Free Speech Special episode of Page 94, the Private Eye magazine podcast.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Another bombshell announcement from Taylor Swift… IT’S PRIVATE EYE WEEK! New edition in shops and with subscribers from Wednesday.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Private Eye is going to Cheltenham Literature Festival! Join Ian Hislop, Andrew Hunter Murray, Adam Macqueen and Helen Lewis for a live recording of our podcast Page 94. www.cheltenhamfestivals.org/events/priva...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Not making a dog’s dinner of things… This week's Eye workies, Callum and Ella, with the front covers from the fortnight they were born 👀
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: Scot Free Ian, Helen, Adam and Andy discuss the new memoir by Nicola Sturgeon and its effect on Scottish politics, the risks of falling in love with ChatGPT, and the rise in British columnists phoning it in from abroad. pod.fo/e/310fc6
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“Thanks for your concern, but I’m actually queueing for an ice cream” From the latest Private Eye, out now.
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Full story online and in the latest issue: www.private-eye.co.uk/street-of-sh... For the rest, including cartoons, Pseuds, Dumb Britain and all the other regulars, you’ll have to buy the magazine.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
David Dinsmore, the Murdoch exec who ran an aggressively hostile campaign against "Red Ed" Miliband's Labour party and denigrated Keir Starmer following the phone-hacking scandal, is now in charge of the Labour government’s comms, leaving both No. 10 and News UK baffled.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Number crunching: Monthly cut to universal credit for newly sick and disabled claimants from 2026 From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“No one will recognise Palestine after I've finished with it” Subscribe to Private Eye: checkout.private-eye.co.uk/SingleItem?I...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Why Dubai is finished by Our London Correspondent Isabel Cheapshott From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“Not effin’ football again!” From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
As the Gaza famine death toll rises, UK imports of Israeli fruit and veg have soared - £51.3m in just three months, up from £29.1m. While Palestinians starve, Israel’s agricultural exports to Britain are booming. Full story by ‘Slicker’ in the latest issue.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Students studying abroad. Pure indoctrination! From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Poetry Corner: In Memoriam The Late Show From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“We’ll share out the booty after we’ve allocated a percentage to our CSR schemes” From the new Private Eye, out now
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The Eye asked the Centre for Migration Control for more information regarding its employees, funding, research methodology and third-party validation, but received no response. Full story in the new Private Eye, out now. 🧵 2/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Who’s behind the Centre for Migration Control? This so-called “research organisation” has been cited in The Sun, The Telegraph, The Times and Express - but it appears to be run by one man with a Brexit campaign past, publishing opaque and selective data and wild claims about migrants. 🧵 1/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reposted
Starmer: UK will recognise Palestine The new Private Eye is out now.
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➡️ Read all previous parts of our special report into the Lucy Letby case online: www.private-eye.co.uk/special-repo...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
On the Lucy Letby case, MD writes: the conclusion of the UK’s most senior neonatologist on last weekend’s ITV documentary was clear. You don’t need to invent a murderer, or methods of murder, to explain how these babies died. MD's latest on the Lucy Letby case, only in the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Number crunching: Brits who think new online age verification laws won’t work v rise in demand for VPN services. From the new Private Eye, in shops now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Starmer: UK will recognise Palestine The new Private Eye is out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
With The Naked Gun back in cinemas this week, it’s a timely reminder of the importance of supporting decades-old satirical institutions full of in-jokes. In completely unrelated news… IT’S PRIVATE EYE WEEK! New issue in shops and with subscribers from Wednesday.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
And now, an important message... ➡️ Subscriptions and gifts: private-eye.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Lucy and Anuk, this week’s Eye workies, with the front covers from the fortnight they were born 👀 (Also featuring our occasional office hound, Luna)
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“We will set up offshore migrant hubs in a safe country” From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: Protests, Placards, Palestine and Private Eye. The story of the Eye reader who printed out a joke from the Eye, took it to a march… and got arrested. Page 94 interviews the man at the centre of the story. pod.fo/e/305323
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Flexible working From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
The Yorkshire (lack of) water region: some affected places From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Summer quiz: Why are migrant hotel locations kept secret? From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
From the latest Private Eye, out now. Subscribe today to get the next issue delivered direct to your door. ⤵️ 🌐 checkout.private-eye.co.uk/SingleItem?I... 📞 01858 438850
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Prince Harry follows in mother's footsteps Subscribe to Private Eye: checkout.private-eye.co.uk/SingleItem?I...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Something for the weekend.... Gregg Wallace diagnosed with "awfulism" From our cooking correspondent AR Fryer in the latest Eye, in shops now! Or subscribe here: www.subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
In the latest Private Eye: Elon Musk fails to control his AI chatbot Grok after it self identifies as Hitler and has an antisemitic meltdown 🤖 Read more online here: private-eye.co.uk/media-news Or subscribe here: subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
No #PMQs today as the entirety of Westminster has disappeared off on holiday 🏖️ But you can still get your political fix of news, jokes and investigative journalism with our brand new issue out today and throughout the rest of the summer! Or subscribe here: www.subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Part 24 of our Special Report into the Lucy Letby case is now available to download from the Eye website here: private-eye.co.uk/special-repo... Part 25 by Dr Phil Hammond is also available to read in the brand new issue of Private Eye which is out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
The police have confirmed there will be no further action: however, even when no charges are brought, being arrested under the Terrorism Act leaves a record potentially affecting travel and employment. Read the full story in the latest Private Eye. Or subscribe here: subsonline.co.uk 2/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Are Private Eye jokes now... criminal? PALESTINE Solidarity campaigner Jon Farley was arrested during a silent march in Leeds last weekend. What egregious act had prompted the police to act? He was, er, carrying a Private Eye joke piece as a placard! (1/2)
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Government tackles water crisis - time for a U-turd? Brand new Private Eye is out now, featuring your favourite emoji 💩 (...and yes you can do all the poo jokes you need to do) Available from all good newsagents Or subscribe here: www.subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Hooray, it's Private Eye week 🎉 Will John Torode and Gregg Wallace be featuring in a follow up #Masterchef cover to issue 1638 from December? You can find out this Wednesday, available from all good newsagents Or subscribe here: www.subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
London heatwave. Those underground stations in full: From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: The Epstein Fails Ian, Helen, Adam and Andy discuss the schism tearing apart the MAGA movement, ask Jane Mackenzie about the goings-on at Bangor Cathedral, and enjoy a special Fictional Memoir quiz about the biggest story in the book world. pod.fo/e/2fc712
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Abbatoir From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
The children’s publishing world was rocked this week as a book was released by a new author who wasn’t a celebrity. From the latest Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
Full story online and in the latest issue: www.private-eye.co.uk/in-the-back For the rest, including cartoons, Pseuds, Dumb Britain and all the other regulars, you’ll have to buy the magazine. 🧵 2/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
It is now 18 months since the European boss of Fujitsu, which supplied the crap Horizon system and whose officials lied to sub-postmasters and to courts about it, accepted moral responsibility and said the company would cough up. Yet it still hasn’t handed over a bean. 🧵 1/2
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Subscribe to Private Eye today and have the next issue delivered straight to your door. ➡️ Get 26 issues for just £45. Subscribe: subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
A weep in politics Subscribe to Private Eye: subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Trump: the comprehensive Mexican food acronyms From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“I’m just saying we’d collect more nectar if we weren’t in meetings all day” From the new Private Eye, out now.
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PLUS news from the Rotten Boroughs of Redbridge, Ashfield, Lincolnshire, Devon, Northumberland, and Warwickshire in the new Eye. Plus a Reform round-up.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
South Ayrshire council’s leader and its chief executive have both stepped back from their roles after secret recordings showed them favouring firms with lucrative building and demolition contracts in Ayr town centre.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
London is Over, Finished, and Washed Up By Professor Matt Goodwhinge From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Bucket hat sales soar as Oasis tour. From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“I’m confiscating your phone...” From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
The Telegraph slammed the BBC for “championing” Bob Vylan…. But the Telegraph forgot to mention it gave Bob Vylan a glowing four-star review last year and trumpeted that they “had somehow established a mood of feel-good catharsis." Full story in the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reposted
TWO-TEAR KEIR! The new Private Eye is out now.
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MD's latest on the Lucy Letby case, only in the new Private Eye, out now. ➡️ Read part 23 of our special report into the Lucy Letby case online now: www.private-eye.co.uk/special-repo...
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
On the Lucy Letby case, MD asks: What in baby O’s medical records led defence experts to conclude this was a case of gross negligence manslaughter, not murder? How did prosecution experts miss a series of glaring medical errors so clearly documented? Will Police now investigate?
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
How charity works, 1985 vs 2025 From the new Private Eye, in shops now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
TWO-TEAR KEIR! The new Private Eye is out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Some Might Say IT'S PRIVATE EYE WEEK! New issue in shops and with subscribers from Wednesday. Here’s some of Liam Gallagher’s Diary from issue 1575 (June 2022), as tweeted to Craig Brown…
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
“Keep your voice down…”
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Just weeks after the Eye questioned Scotland Yard's reluctance to consider compelling new evidence around the death of Mark Blanco at a 2006 gathering attended by singer Pete Doherty, detectives closed the case. Full story online and in the latest issue: www.private-eye.co.uk/in-the-back
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reposted
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: Labour, Heatwaves and Glasto Ian, Helen, Adam and Andy discuss Labour’s first year in almost-power, Britain’s recent unseasonal warmth and what might possibly be causing it, and what you can and can’t shout at Glasto. pod.fo/e/2f356d
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: Labour, Heatwaves and Glasto Ian, Helen, Adam and Andy discuss Labour’s first year in almost-power, Britain’s recent unseasonal warmth and what might possibly be causing it, and what you can and can’t shout at Glasto. pod.fo/e/2f356d
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Research finds using AI makes you stupid From the latest Private Eye, out now.
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…or asking for a royal commendation of Ed Miliband’s green agenda (read aloud at an energy summit last month), Brian has been eager to help Starmer out. Full story online and in the latest issue: www.private-eye.co.uk/news 🧵3/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social) reply parent
Prime minister Keir Starmer can’t believe his luck. Whether it’s getting permission to brandish a “confidential” letter to Donald Trump for the cameras, using Brian’s support as a cover to push through potentially risky changes to the Crown Estate (to help fund Great British Energy)… 🧵2/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
King Brian’s willingness to engage in politics has set alarm bells ringing at the palace. 🧵1/3
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Media commentators across Britain have reacted with outrage to something said by an Irish rap group named after the practice of shooting people in the knees. [From issue 1649, May 2025]
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
America at war Subscribe to Private Eye: subsonline.co.uk
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Lookalike: Spinal Tap and Sabrina Carpenter From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Bezos wedding. Dump gifts here. From the new Private Eye, out now.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Real photo of the week From the new Private Eye, out now.
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PLUS news from the Rotten Boroughs of Surrey, Horsham, West Berkshire, North Northants, Warwickshire, and North Tyneside in the new Eye. Plus a Reform round-up.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Croydon’s crisis-torn council hired Adam Wilkinson as interim head of planning, only for him to leave within weeks after it emerged his consultancy had been dissolved following a winding-up order by HM Revenue and Customs for unpaid tax.
Private Eye Magazine (@privateeyenews.bsky.social)
Victims of the child grooming gang scandal say they’re looking forward to seeing the damning report from the national inquiry announced this week by Keir Starmer, and then nothing happening as a result of it. From the new Private Eye, out now.